Matthew ran blindly behind the gurney with kaylyn's body splayed stiffly across. Doctors were walking briskly at her side, muttering incoherent syllables Matthew could not process. And even if he tried to, it would be a hard task because his thoughts were flying frantically around in his head, unsure of a solid foundation in which to land. His thoughts were chaotic...his body was numb. He felt useless...
But just like the doctors he walked alongside the bed, clutching her hand in his and reassuring himself that all would be fine. The tears created a dam in his eyes, waiting on the permission of a blink to fall - To flood his face and attempt at drowning his sorrows. And so he let it fall, knowing it was bound to.
"Ev– everything will be fine, I want you to know that Kaylyn. I want you to be strong," he muttered against her ear, while placing a kiss on her ashen forehead.
"Blood pressure is a bit high. We need to prepare her for surgery now," a doctor exclaimed, and just like that everything crashed into Matthew.
The chattering, the wheels running along the tiles, the cling of equipment. Matthew sucked in a breath, and in that instant he could feel how hard his heart hammered against his chest. A chest a hand was suddenly placed on, barring him off.
"Sir, you need to stay out here," one doctor told him firmly.
"I– I need to be with her," he explained still moving with Kaylyn.
"You can't be in here," the doctor exclaimed again.
Just like that, the gurney turned a small corner and Kaylyn's hand slipped from his. His heart tightened suddenly and just as he was about to go after her, a door closed in his face.
"We'll keep you updated, but for now you just have to be patient while we make your wife better," the doctor consoled, placing a reassuring hand on Matthew's shoulder before she disappeared into the room.
Matthew leaned against the cold wall, sliding to the floor as sobs broke away from him. When he was sitting on the hard surface with his knees to his chest and his head resting against them, it brought back a feeling of déjà vu.
"I'm fine Matt," was what Marsha had weakly said when her first contraction had resulted in Matthew rushing her to the hospital.
Matthew had been so confident in her words that her death had come as an absolute shock to him. It was until he had seen her body that the truth resonated with him.
Now here he was, placed in a similar situation, but this time he felt worst, because he was more connected to Kaylyn. With the possibility of death hanging over him like a dark cloud, Matthew couldn't help but feel lost at the prospect...
But he also knew he had to hold on to that small kindle of hope that told him everything was going to be OK. It had to be.
Still on the floor with the tears flowing from his face, he used the back of his hand to uselessly wiped away the tears from his face, but in that process, he also recognized that his hand was still stained with blood. Kaylyn's blood...
His hands suddenly began to tremble, but another hand was suddenly placed on his in reassurance. Faith hovered over him, with a flushed face and red and puffy eyes. Matthew sniffed and swallowed hard, reminding himself that there were other people who needed him.
Wordlessly, faith stooped beside him, clutching his bloodied hands in hers. Her lips trembled and her eyes watered, but still she managed a shaky smile.
"S– she's strong," she croaked, nodding her head profusely to convince herself of the words she spoke.
Matthew tightly clenched his teeth and averted his gaze, wanting something to distract him from another sad person. However true Faith's words were, he still had to worry.
"She's a fighter and that's what she'll do today. I know she will Faith," trailed off and placed a hand at her mouth to stop herself from crying.
With a blurry glance, Matthew nodded, knowing that he was too weak for words. And for some passing seconds, they sat there until he finally decided to say something.
"Sapph–"
"S–she's with your parents. I called them to be with her. She wouldn't stop crying and..."
"Thank you," Matthew managed as he began to stand.
With rugged hair, a flushed face and a breaking heart, Matthew looked at Faith. "I– my hands," he held them up, before walking aimlessly through the halls, in search of a bathroom.
When he was alone, his face to the mirror and the sink being his support, Matthew fixated his gaze on the person staring back at him, and all of a sudden his thoughts took him back to the past.
"I'll be fine Matt."
"I'm scared."
"We'll be fine, I promise. We'll be fine."
Marsha's words, Kaylyn's words, his words. They all came rushing back to him like a tidal wave, ready to topple him over. The tears of sadness began to stream down Matthew's face again and the words kept replicating in his head, wanting to drown him in more sorrow.
With a yell, Matthew slammed his fist in the mirror and the glass before him shattered, the pieces making distorted versions of him, while his heart felt the way the glasses looked.
His sobs then came out short and raspy, but soon a hand was wrapped around his shoulder in comfort. John Mayhew took his son in his arms and allowed him to cry against his shoulder. He had been there for Matthew with Marsha and now he knew he needed to be there for him with Kaylyn.
"Everything will be fine my boy," he reassured gently, feeling his own eyes burn with the impendent tears, but knew he had to be strong for his son.
#
Matthew and John joined the others in the waiting area some minutes later. His mother's sadness was evident, even more so when she saw Matthew approaching her. If it wasn't for a sleeping Sapphire in her arms, she would run to him, but the love that exuded from her eyes was enough reassurance Matthew needed.
Matthew's gaze drifted to the side where he saw Patrick hugging his shoulders. His eyes were red, his face flushed, his body frail. Matthew slowly walked towards the man in his jacket – dressed for a dinner that was long forgotten.
Seeing Matthew approaching him, Patrick's eyes glistened with tears. Slowly Matthew moved forward and pulled him in for a hug.
Patrick's body trembled momentarily, but he quickly regained his composure.
"My baby girl is not a quitter Matthew, I know that."
Matthew nodded with a sniff, after which pulling apart and patting Patrick on the back.
#
Matthew didn't realize sitting was such a hard task until he was placed in the situation where sitting was all he could do. He wanted to distract himself, he wanted something that would take his mind off the situation, but he could do nothing but sit with his hands on his knees while his legs shook nervously.
Sapphire had fallen asleep in her grandmother's arms– drained from the task of crying for so long. Faith was pacing back and forth, her eyes fixated on the entrance the doctor would come through to give them the news they long awaited for. Patrick and John Mayhew was conversing silently in a far corner, with John's hand placed reassuringly on Patrick's shoulder. Matthew didn't want to look for long, he didn't want to see so much sadness and so he rested his gaze blankly on the off white tiles.
Minutes past with the same driving silence and dreadful anticipation, Matthew thought he'd go insane. He wanted to hear something... He wanted news about Kaylyn and the baby. Currently, he thought that if it was between two choices, he'd choose Kaylyn.
Kaylyn would probably give them other babies – they'd adopt even, but a baby could not give him another Kaylyn. He pleaded in his mind for her survival – He didn't know what he would do if she died. She had grown to be too important for him. He would lose himself if he lost her.
Tears pricked his eyes again, but before they fell, a hand was laid on his shoulder. Matthew looked up to find his dad.
"Son, we're going to pray," he informed softly.
Matthew was hesitant, but then he sat up, deciding that he would. They held hands in a small circle– Matthew held Patrick's and despite the frailness his body possessed, he still found the strength to squeeze Matthew's hand in comfort.
Matthew smiled, thinking that if such a weak man carried hope, then why couldn't he.
"Lord, you know our reason for calling upon you today..." John began, Matthew's throat tightened as he closed his eyes.
For a minute, the prayer continued and as soon as they pulled apart with the belief that God would work in their favour, a doctor arrived.
Matthew jumped out of his chair and moved towards the man. Soon after, the man in blue scrubs was surrounded by an eager family.
"The surgery was successful," he saw that they still held their breaths and so he continued. "The baby's oxygen supply was low and he's a bit premature but he's alright. We have him incubated for now. He should be fine with time," he smiled.
"So it's a 'he?'" John laughed. The doctor nodded.
Matthew sighed heavily but knew that he couldn't be completely happy just yet, although the news of the baby was refreshing. "W–what about Kaylyn? Is she OK? Can we see her?" he asked, somewhat afraid of the answers.
The doctor cleared his throat, his demeanour changing completely, but then a smile split his face. "She will be fine. She's resting now, still weak from the blood lost, but you can go see her in a while."
Matthew was left speechless after the information, too joyfully dumbfounded to even utter a word. His mouth was agape, his eyes wide as the pressure that had seemingly been resting on his chest, eased.
"S–so she's alright?" he choked.
The doctor nodded with a smile. "She will be. Congratulations on your baby boy," he exclaimed before stepping off.
For some passing seconds, Matthew still stood there, too overwhelmed to move, but when John Mayhew pulled him in for a hug, he gave in to his joy, hugging his father tightly as the tears of joy fell from his eyes.
"I have a baby boy...and Kaylyn," he whispered against his father's neck, repeating the words until he laughed at how happy it made him feel.
Hearing the sudden ruckus Sapphire stirred in her grandmother's arms muttering a barely audible, "Dad?"
Matthew tore himself apart from his father and took Sapphire from Rachel's arms. She was now staring at him with cloudy eyes.
"Daddy, what's wrong?" she asked in a muffled tone.
Matthew was grinning. "Kaylyn is alright and you have a baby brother!" he chirped mirthfully.
Sapphire smiled as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes. "Ewe, but boys are gross!" she announced, earning laughs from everyone in the room.
Matthew pulled her against his chest as he laughed, revelling in the fact that this was the best moment in his life.
He couldn't wait to see his baby.
He couldn't wait to see Kaylyn.
____________________________________
Hey guys!!! I'm so sorry I took so long to update. I think it's the longest I kept you guys hanging, but it was beyond my control.
Anyway, I hope your wait wasn't in vain. I hope you guys enjoy! OMG! I didn't kill anyone! Lol...yet! :p
There's just a few chapters left until the book is complete *cries*
But please tell me what you guys thought of this chapter! Please! ;)
OK, so I think that's it.
As always, thank you so much for reading and leaving wonderful comments! I love you guys!!!! Yaaay!
OK bye.