Amy POV
It's been three days, three days since I admitted to Ricky and Grace what happened to me. Ricky hasn't wanted to leave my side. I haven't been able to go to the old apartment yet. I miss it, but I don't think I'm ready. I love Ricky, for not wanting to leave me alone, but I need some time alone. I need to be able to take a shower without him in the bathroom with me, or pee without him being on the other side of the bathroom door. I need to be able to cry, in peace. I don't know how to tell him, that I need him to be normal with me again. The only time he will leave me alone is when my dad or Jack is around. Even then he is scared, because they don't know about my rape. Even then Grace is baby sitting me. I just woke up, my eyes aren't even open yet, yet I know Ricky is staring at me. Like he has been for three days, straight. Today is the day, the day I tell him that I love him but can't take it. I sigh, and open my eyes. Before I can say anything, I hear a knock on the door. Ricky smiles, "I'll get it." He says. He gets out of bed and heads for the front door. I get out of bed and put on my robe. "Amy, it's Grace." I hear Ricky yell. I walk out of my old room. "Hey, Grace." I say coming into the living room. "I'll make breakfast." I hear Ricky announce. He walks to the kitchen. I look at Grace and point towards my old room. I look into Johns old nursery, on the way to my room. I want to see my son, I think to myself. I close the bedroom door behind Grace. "I can't take it any longer. I need him out, I need time to myself. I need to cry alone, again. I need to pee in peace and shower in peace. I didn't know how he would handle the news, but this was one of my fears. I know he wants to protect me. But, I can't take it." I tell Grace. "Amy, you have to tell him, that. You have to tell him, you need him to give you some space and some power back. I knew you'd come to this feeling sooner or later, honestly it's sooner then I thought though." Grace says smiling at me and leaning in to hug me. "I'm gonna go, I just wanted to check in. Call me...if..." Grace trails off. "Sorry, I'm doing it too. We just don't know how to act." I smile at Grace and hug her. We walk out of my room and she leaves, I go to the kitchen, "Grace left." I say looking at Ricky. "Oh. That was fast." Ricky replies. I just smile at him. We eat breakfast in silence. I go to do the dishes. "I want to go see John." I inform Ricky, "and then after you can bring me back, drop me off and you and John can hang out today." Ricky looks at me confused. "Ricky, I love you, but I need some space. This was one of the possible reactions I was afraid of from you, either you'd see me different and you'd disappear or you'd see me different and hold on tighter. I'm sorry but I can't be babysat 24/7." We spend the next four hours with John, when it's time for his nap, Ricky and I go to the car, "Can I just go to the apartment?" I ask Ricky. "Sure, Ames. If that's what you want. How'd you like being with John?" Ricky replies. "It was nice, I'm not sure how I'll feel if I'm alone with him. Or how I'll feel as he gets older. I'm gonna try, one day at a time. For now." I reply.
Ricky POV
It was so nice watching Amy with John today. So far, so good. I know I'm holding onto Amy too tight. I know, I need to give her space. Which I'm going to do. I knew she was going to tell me I was holding on too tight, I think that's why I did it. So she could tell me. I need her to tell me what she needs, I think she needs it too. I think she needs to see, I care about her and her needs. I'll do whatever she needs. I really do love her. I hope she can see that. "Daddy, I love you." John says pulling me out of my thoughts. "I love you too buddy." I tell my son. "Daddy, I don't want a new Daddy!" John tells me. "What John? Who said you're going to get a new Daddy? I'm your Daddy, nothing will ever change that." I tell my son, confused. " Martin, my friend at day care. He says Mommy left to find me a new Daddy." John informs me. I frown, just when I think things can't get worse. "John, its late, we need to go home, get you a nap, and then it's dinner time. We will talk about this with Mommy later. Don't worry about what Martin said. I love you, John." I put John in the car and we leave the park. John falls asleep on the ride home. I carry John upstairs put him to bed and go to talk to Amy.
"Ames, we have a problem." I say sitting down on the sofa bed. Amy looks at me terrified. "What, what's wrong? Is John okay?" Amy asks standing up, I reach over and grab her arm, I gently pull her back down, "Physically John is fine. John informed me today...." I sigh knowing this is going to suck. "John informed me today that Martin, his friend at day care, told him you left to find him a new Daddy." Amy looks at me horrified. "That's ridiculous. I left for school, Ricky you know that." Amy says to me with tears in her eyes. "Ames, I know you're going through a lot right now, but we have to talk to John. John is scared." Amy has been crying for the last hour. She won't talk to me. She just lays on the bed and crys, finally she walks to the bathroom cleans herself up and comes over to me and sits down. "I'm going to go get John, mind if I go for a drive, with him? I created this problem, I want to try to fix it myself. He will be off his schedule tomorrow but this is important, when him and I get back we can both talk to him, if you want." Amy says to me. "That's fine, if you're sure." Amy looks at me, I know she's thinking about something, "what Ames? What are you thinking?" Amy sighs and I'm shocked by her response. "Why does he think he would get a new Daddy? A new Mommy is much more likely." I laugh. "He hasn't seen you much. He knows, I'm not with anyone. No woman has been around him other than the ones he is used to, at day care or family." I smile, at Amy and she shows no emotion. Amy goes to John's room, she sits in the room with him for an hour and they talk. I don't try to listen in. If she wanted me to hear this conversation or be part of it she would bring him out in the living room or ask me to come in his room. Finally they both emerge. Smiles on their faces. Amy picks up John and puts him on our bed. She sits down too and he get in between us. "Want to tell Daddy what we said John?" Amy asks John. "We said, I have the perfect Daddy, and nothing can change that. We also said you're going to school in New York, so I learn to follow my dreams, when I get older. And that we will always be a family." Amy looks at John, "And what else John?" Amy asks John. "That no one can replace Daddy, in your heart." Amy smiles at John. "That's right John. Now is anything else bothering you John?" Amy says. "I'm hungry." John says, I laugh. "Well Daddy got food while you and Mommy talked." I tell John. I stand up and go to the kitchen, and grab the plates of Chinese I ordered and dished out. I put them on the table and we all sit and eat. After we eat I tell John and bedtime story, but get interrupted in the middle "Daddy, you won't get me a new Mommy, will you?" Here we go again. "Ames!!" I yell. Not knowing what she said exactly to John earlier, and walk out of the room. I walk to the kitchen where Amy is doing dishes, "Now John seems to think he is getting a new Mommy. What exactly did you say to him, when you talked to him?" Amy turns around. "I told him the truth. So go try that. Whatever that is." Amy turns back towards the dishes. I go back to John's room, I sit on his bed and I put John in my lap. I tell him the truth, the story of his mother and I. "John, when I met Mommy, I didn't love myself. I knew from the beginning I had feelings for Mommy, though and it scared me. She had feelings for Uncle Ben, though. So I stepped aside. Little by little your Mommy found her way deeper and deeper into my heart. I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with Mommy last year. I also knew Mommy wanted to go to New York. I didn't want to go, so we stayed here, but now I think it's time we go to New York with Mommy. I love your Mommy and nothing will ever change that. Your Mommy is perfect and she completes us. You will never get a new Mommy." I smile at my sleepy son, I lay him down and stand up, as I'm walking out the door, John asks "Daddy, will you ever marry Mommy?" I sigh and turn back around, I kneel by his bed, "One day, I hope to buddy. I love you, go to sleep." I kiss the top of John's head and stand up and walk out of his room.
Amy is in the bathroom when I come out, I go sit on the bed and open my night stand and look at the engagement ring that used to be on her hand. I sigh, and close the drawer. I lay in bed thinking about how to get back to where I want my life to be. Where I thought my life was going before Amy left for New York. Amy lays down next to me. "How'd it go with John?" She asks cuddling into my chest. I sigh, "Pretty well, I think. I told him the truth. Which is basically the same thing you said to him." We go to sleep. Sleep is hard for me to find cause I'm worried about how to get Amy back.
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The next day
Amy, Ricky and John wake up late because of the late night they all had. They get breakfast and take John to George's wanting to spend the day without John around so they can talk alone. Amy and Ricky get back to the apartment and lay down, still tired from the previous night. They take a short nap, when they wake up they just cuddled into each other.
Amy looks at Ricky and kisses him. "Ames, I have a question." Ricky announces, not sure how to ask. "What's up Ricky?" Amy says, knowing the real answer to her question, but not sure if that's what he wants. "When Grace asked you, the other day about sex..." he trails off. "Never mind. Sorry." Ricky starts to get out of bed, but Amy curls around him, and kisses his neck. He lets out a slight moan. Amy pulls Ricky back to bed, "I'm not sure if I'm ready yet, Ricky. I don't know, if I'll know for sure until after." They make out for the next two hours. All of a sudden Ricky stops their make out session and rolls over. "Ricky?" Amy asks confused. He ignores her. Amy pulls on Ricky arm he resists. "Ricky, what's wrong?" Amy asks. Ricky stands up and walks to the bathroom, Amy follows. Finally she see tears in his eyes. "Ricky, what's wrong?" Amy asks sternly. "I, I, I, can't help it I wa, wan, want you." Ricky says finally turning to her, Amy wraps Ricky in a hug. "Ricky, I'm not sure, if I can. But as long as I can say stop. We can, try." Amy looks up, and kisses him roughly, with a lot of desire. Ricky picks Amy up bridal style and carries her to their bed. He lays her down. "Are you sure? We can stop, anytime you need to." Ricky says. "We can try." Ricky kisses her neck, to that Amy moans. "Be gentle." Amy says. Amy rips Ricky shirt off, not careing that she ruined it. Amy kisses his chest, he moans loud. Amy removes her shirt, and tosses it. Then her bra. Ricky licks his lips and kisses her stomach. "Ahhhhhhh, Ricky" Amy moans. Ricky looks her in the eyes and moves to her breasts. "May I?" He asks, seeking approval for his next move, to answer Amy grabs his head and pushes him toward her. He sucks, gently on her breast. "Aaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh" Amy screams into the pillow. She reaches down and undoes his pants feeling his bulge. She removes his pants and boxers at the same time. Amy grabs his shaft and starts to play with it "Fffffuuuuucccccckkkkk!!" Ricky screams into the bed. Amy removes her pants, but continues to play with him with one hand. "I want you." Ricky whispers in Amy's ear. He positions himself at her entrance. "Wanna go doggie style?" Amy asks him ready to move. Ricky stops her, "No, I want to be able to look into your eyes, and know you're okay. The whole time." He sighs, "Please Ames. I want to know you want me too. Please." Ricky pleads. "Okay." Amy says. Ricky repositions himself at her entrance, he looks into her eyes, "You sure Ames? You're sure you're sure you want to?" Amy nods in approval. "Ames, I need words, please." Ricky says, still unsure if she's ready. "I want you Ricky. I need you. I'm ready." Ricky, about to go but stops. "I, I, I want you on top of me." Ricky finally says. "I'm sorry, but I'd be more comfortable if you could get off if you need to." Ricky explains his thoughts and rolls them over. Amy smiles at his politeness. Amy looks away and starts to slide down his shaft. Ricky moves so he doesn't enter her. He reaches up grabs Amy's face. "Look into my eyes, Ames. The whole time. I'm serious. I love you, I need to know you're okay." Amy looks into his eyes, he once again repositions so he can enter her, when she's ready. She puts his hands on her hips, and jams herself down hard and fast. "Fuuuuucccccckkkkk yyyyeeeeeaaaahhh" they both say in unison. They both instantly cum, for the first time in months together. As she feels him cum inside her for the first time, she instantly says, "really already?" He smirks, "I couldn't help it, I haven't you know, in months." She starts to get off. "You can't?" Ricky asks Amy. She looks at him confused, "you finished" she says. "Ames, I didn't finish it was just one a little early. I'm no where near done. If you aren't. If you are that's okay too." He says trying to reinforce that he isn't pushing her. She jams herself back down, and goes slow but hard at first. "God, I love you Ricky." She says to him. She goes a little faster. "Fuck Ames!!!" Ricky screams. They both cum another five times over the next hour. Amy rolls off of Ricky out of breath. She rests for five minutes. Finally she looks at him and says "We can go as long as you want, but I need a new position." Amy says to Ricky. "Don't tell me that, I could go all night. With you." Ricky smirks. "Me too." Amy says, biting her lip. At that Ricky gets on top of Amy, looks at her for approval and she nods. At that he jams himself back into her going hard and fast from the beginning. After another hour of having sex with Ricky on top, they crash down onto the bed, and fall asleep. They sleep for about an hour, get up make sandwiches then decide it's go time again. This time they decide to do doggie style. They go for another hour. They cuddle the rest of the night. All of a sudden Ricky looks at Amy, who looks like she's asleep. "Ames, I really am madly in love with you and I really do want to spend the rest of our lives together."