This chapter is dedicated to LunaMoon365 :) Thank you so much for commenting on my chapter! I hope you enjoy this one!
Disclaimer: I don't own the material in this story, it belongs to J.K. Rowling. I only own what I come up with.
IMPORTANT: In case you didn't see my comment on the last chapter or didn't see my status... I uploaded 4 more pages onto chapter eight... last chapter... so if you didn't read those you should go back and read them, if you don't you will probably not understand what went on between Ava and Draco. SO PLEASE GO BACK AND READ.
I won't keep you waiting any longer... please vote and comment :)
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Chapter 9
I felt a gentle squeeze on my hand and looked up to see Draco's usually smirking face looking down at me tenderly.
" Ava." He said simply... longingly. He didn't need to say anything else, I could feel the emotions emenating from him in our intense little bubble.
He leaned in causiously to see whether I wanted to kiss him, and to prolong the moment.
I leaned in not wanting any more space between us. I didn't care that Draco still needed to break up with Pansy and technically had two girlfriends, I didn't care about Petar... not in the way I cared about Draco... not nearly as close. I didn't care that the 2nd task was only 2 days away and Harry still hasn't figured out the hint. All I cared about was Draco, right here and right now.
Right when I was about to let our lips meet, I started to fall.
I fell hard in a dark room, falling especially on my knees. I cried out in pain, and held in the tears in my eyes.
I couldn't see anything. It was like I was in a dark black hole.
I could only hear a voice, my father's voice, in parstletongue. His voice seemed to echo every sentence he said at least twelve times, it gave me goosebumps. I was truthfully, for the first time, scared of my father.
" Ava.... You shall be in my grasp soon." His voice echoed through the blackness.
" Where are you?! Why am I here!?" I screamed sounding pathetic next to my father's echoing dark voice. My voice didn't even echo.
" Have fun at Hogwarts and with your mother as much as you can, sweetheart, because you will soon be away from there. You will be with me. You won't have a reason to stay with Potter or the rest of the scum your with. You will be strong. You will be feared. You will be like me. Voldemort." My father's voice echoed. His voice seemed to grow louder with each word until I had to put my hands over my ears to keep my ear drums from bursting.
I started to cry. That was my worst fear. I could never be like him. Never, never, never, never.
" No! No! No! No! NOOOO!!!" I started to scream into the blackness " I won't be like you!!!"
" Ava!!" Hermione shouted worriedly at me.
I opened my eyes and instantly realized it was just a dream. It was ALL just a dream.
I looked up to see Hermione perched on my bed staring down at me with wide and worried eyes.
I sat up slowly and felt the cold sweat. My shirt was clinging to my back and my face was sticky.
" Nightmare." I said simply and so quietly that I thought Hermione wouldn't have heard me, but she did.
" You scared me to death! You were screaming like a maniac!" She breathed out slowly.
I watched as the worry in her eyes slowly subsided into concern.
" Are you alright?" She asked quietly.
I hated her tone. She made it sound like she was talking to a two year old that had a nightmare and like I was about to start screaming again.
" Yeah I'm fine." I said stiffly.
Hermione seemed to realize that I wasn't in the mood to talk and smiled at me before walking out of the dorm.
I huffed and fell back on my bed hardly.
I stared up at the canopy of my bed and thought of my dream. A dream that started out so perfect and was intensly ruined by my father.
Was it a real dream.... or was it somthing more?
I couldn't tell you how long I layed in bed just thinking about my dream. It made shivers go down my spine. I have never been threatned by my father's presence, not toward me anyway. When we were in the chamber, he was quite sweet to me.
Of course I wasn't fearful of my father, that is ridiculas. I'm fearfull of what he said.... I would be like him.... No. I refuse. I won't ever let that happen. I would have to much to lose by joining him and being like him.
I sat up slowly and looked at the clock on my bedside table and groaned.
It was noon. I've missed half the school day!
I sighed and went to take a shower. I didn't see the point in rushing to get to class, the day was already half over.
I climbed in the shower and sighed as the hot water cascaded down my back. The hot water loosened my tense muscles and cleaned all traces of the sticky perspiration that clung to me. I didn't rush the shower. I needed to relax.
I only got out of the shower when I could feel the water becoming cool.
I sighed. The shower wasn't nearly as long as I had wanted it to be.
I clumsily put my clothes on and combed through my wet hair.
After I combed my hair I stared at my reflection in the mirror. I had huge bags under my eyes. I sighed and touched the bags. I really hated having nightmares, especially when they take a physical toll on me like this one had.
I lowered my hand from my face and started intently at the mirror. I raked my eyes over my face, that so resembled my father's. My face was one that provoked fear from the teachers first year. Who knew that one person could effect people to such a extent? People were so afraid of my father that they became wary of me! How absurd! I wouldn't hurt a soul, not unless they gave me reason to at least... but still.
I still stared at my relfection and watched as my face suddenly started to morph. My once pretty human face morphed into the inhuman face of my father.
I screamed and pushed myself away from the mirror roughly. I fell hard on the floor and I started to hyperventilate. I started to pat my face worriedly and sighed in relief when I could feel my nose, my plump lips and my long dark hair.
I curled into the fetal position and held on tightly to my knees as I started to cry.
I tried to stop the tears, for they were pointless and unneeded. But just the fact that it wasn't real, that my father's face wasn't my own, gave me such relief.
I could sense an underlying meaning. I could sense that these dreams were like visions, they were telling me something. The message was becoming clearer and clearer, and they were starting to scare me.
I started to sob harder, for I know what the message was, though I expected it all along. My father wants me to be like him... yes obviously... but what scares me is that my father always gets what he wants. What if it is inevitable? What if it's in my nature to become a cold blooded murderer? What if I never wanted to be like him, and he threatned the lives of the ones I loved?
The message? He wants me, and he will do anything to get me, even if that meant hurting the ones I love.
I couldn't grasp onto the concept of any of my friends... or mom, or Sirius getting hurt because of me...
I know what's going to happen, and I think I've known it all along. I'm going to end up with him whether I want to or not. I'm going to end up torturing people whether I want to or not. I may even end up killing a person or two, whether I want to or not. My father has made up his mind. I had no choice in the matter.
I started to get control of myself and stopped my tears. I still sniffled and wiped the evidence of the traitor tears that had escaped me. I hated to cry. I didn't like being weak.
" You know that crying isn't a weakness Ava." A wise old voice said from above me.
I looked up to see Dumbledore smiling softly down at me.
" Professor..." I said at a loss for what to say. I mean what could I say? We were both alone in a girls toilet and I'm bawling my eyes out whilst in the fetal position.
Dumbledore's eyes sparkled and he said " Ava.... don't be afraid to cry. It isn't a weakness. Crying is proof that you are human, that you feel pain, or happiness.That you can feel."
" I don't understand professor." I said confusedly " Crying..."
Dumbledore held his hand up to shush me and sat down beside me and took out some candy.
" Want some?" He asked
" Um, no sir, thank you though." I said as I continued to wipe at my eyes that seemed determined to leak tears no matter if I wanted them to stop.
" You were thinking of your father... yes.... You think that you are destined to be like him?" Dumbledore suddenly asked, though it sounded more like a statement.
I nodded my head confusedly. How could he know this?
" Your father never cried." Dumbledore mused " He had no feelings toward anything to do such a thing."
His sudden changes of subjects were making my head hurt.
" He's stronger than I am though..." I said aggrevatedly at myself. Why couldn't I control myself like him?
" No, no Ava. I do believe that you are much... MUCH stronger than your father." Dumbledore said as he analyzed a lemon candy before he popped it into his mouth.
" I don't understand professor. I could never be stronger than him.... I am just a girl, he... he... blimey... he killed Professor! He has so much power that people fear his name!" I said as I tried to understand where all of these ridiculas ideas were coming from. Please... Me? More powerful than my own father? Pssshhh... as if.
" But like I said Ava... You father never cried." Dumbledore said, his eyes sparking at me in amusement.
I stared blankly at him " Isn't that a good thing? For him anyway? You would never see a poweful wizard crying as he dueled with another... that just doesn't happen."
Dumbledore chuckled and explained " Ava my dear.... your father is so far gone, that he has trouble feeling anymore... he barely has any emotions.... except when it comes to you...."
" I'm lost." I said as I rubbed my temples.
I loved Dumbledore, but sometimes he was so wise and confusing that he made my head hurt.
" Your father is a ruthless and cold hearted man Ava.... except when it comes...to... YOU. You have the power to sway him. YOU make him feel. Feeling is something new to him. Your the only one who had the ability to make him feel, not even your mother did, and he made love to her." Dumbledore said trying to get me to grasp the amount of control I had over my father.
" So I can control him... just by being me? But what does that have to do with crying and emotions?" I asked
" Quite a bit Miss Wilson. You see.... by you crying, it proves that you have emotions and feelings. Those are things that your father never had. You have people who love you that surround you and support you... something he never had, He has death eaters, but they hardly count... if he died.... they would go back to life as it was before he made life difficult, they don't love him and he certainly doesn't love them. They are just assets. So you see Ava? While he has no one... you have everyone. If you had no feelings you wouldn't be nearly as popular as you are now. You having feelings only proves more that you are very different from your father. You have the ability to see right from wrong and picking the good side. Something he would never have done." Dumbledore explained.
I nodded my head " I never thought about it that way." I stated.
" Well I'm glad I got to enlighten you. Now Ava, I sense that there have been dreams lately hasn't there.... you and Harry both seem to have them." Dumbledore said " Would you mind to enlighten me this time?"
" It's my father." I murmured softly while I looked away from him.
" I keep having dreams... My father wants Harry and I. He plans to return and when he does... he wants me with him, to be like him." I said with disgust. " And I fear that it's only a matter of time when his wish comes true and I'm with him."
Dumbledore soaked in what I have said with a grim expression " I have sensed your father as well, not by dreams... but nature reveals things to those who listen.... I don't think you should worry to much on these dreams Ava. It's unhealthy. You will be fine, your father loves you, no matter the consequence. You may end up in his grasp... I won't lie to you... but I'm happy to say that even if you are on the other side, the darker side... you can still do good."
" Are you saying that even if I'm on the dark side that I can still do good? How?" I asked eagerly.
Dumbledore smiled and stood up. " Now, I believe that I can enlighten you on that subject later. For now.... I'll give you a pass to excuse you from classes today. Rest, Ava. I have a feeling that I'll be seeing you very soon."
I said goodbye and watched as he left the bathroom.
What was he about to say! I really wanted to know!
I shakily stood up seeing as I have been in the fetal position and crying for awhile now. I walked back into the dorms and got my Pj's back on. I was definitly going to use that pass.
I got into bed, not expecting to go to sleep, I didn't want to have nightmares, but I surprisingly fell asleep quickly.
" Ava?" Hermione whispered with her hand on my forehead. " Are you sure your alright? You weren't in classes today... Draco was worried."
The sound of Draco's name alerted me and I sat up straight. " Oh, yeah I'm ok. I just decided to have a day in... I needed it."
" Ok, so you feel better?" Hermione asked again.
" Yes." I sighed as I sat up.
" Good.... then you can get dressed and walk with me to dinner... I bet your starving." Hermione said chuckling.
Right on cue my stomach growled. Hermione laughed.
I forgot that I was in bed all day, and didn't eat at all.
I slowly got up and looked down at my PJ's.
" I really don't feel like changing... I'd just change back after dinner." I said slowly as I stretched.
" I'm sure you won't be the only one in Pj's Ava, now lets go... you're not the only hungry one." Hermione said while dragging me out of the room.
I let her drag me and we made our way into the common room.
" Blimey, Ava... you don't look so good." Ron said as he traced the bags under my eyes with his pinkie finger.
" Thanks Ron, you know I love hearing that." I said not even bothering to sound sarcastic. I was tired, which was weird seeing as I slept most of the day.
" Your hair looks like you stuck your finger in an outlet." Harry said grinning from ear to ear as he took in my hair.
I glared at him and said " WELL! Whenever you guys are done insulting my appearence, I would love to eat!" I said sassily as I walked toward the common room portrait.
I Could hear my friends chuckling from behind me and I heard someone catch up to me.
Harry caught up to me easily and put his arm around me.
" Ava.... are you sure your ok... you look dead on your feet." Harry said in my ear so no one could hear.
" Just tired... I had a bad nightmare last night that really shook me up." I said truthfully as I yawned.
Instead of saying something Harry gave my shoulder a gentle squeeze and rubbed my arm soothingly.
I sighed in contentment. It was always so easy to be with Harry. I could kiss him on the cheek, heck, I could kiss him on the lips and we would never think anything of it... unfortunately other people did, so it's hard to be really close when we are supposed to be broken up.
I smiled at Harry and rested my head on his shoulder for s short moment while we walked.
When we got to the great hall I sat beside Harry and used his shoulder as a pillow and waited for the food to appear.
I was about to doze off when I felt Harry shake me gently. " Ava, the foods here."
I opened my eyes reluctantly and put food on my plate and started to eat.
I mainly listened as my friends talked, I was to tired to supply any conversation or to egg it on.
" Ava..." Hermione whispered from my other side " Draco's staring at you.."
I looked up to see Draco giving me a once over. He saw me looking and he cocked his eyebrow. He probably was confused about why I looked like dino turds right now.
I fake yawned at him and he smirked at me before going back to his conversation with Blaise Zabini.
I sighed and continued to stare at Draco. I don't think I'll ever get used to how beautiful he is.
" Ava?" Harry asked suddenly.
I jerked my head toward him in surprise and blushed when he looked between Draco and I, as if he saw me staring.
" Yes, Harry?" I asked innocently.
Harry furrowed his brows for a moment, and glared toward Draco before answering me " Well, I was wondering if you could help me uncover what the hint means.... I went into the bathroom earlier for a bath, and the egg worked underwater."
" That's great Harry! Of course I'll help you." I said warmly trying to pry his glare from Draco.
" Thanks. We'll meet tomorrow night in the library.... right after classes." Harry said reluctantly turning toward me again. " And Ava?"
" Yea...?" I asked nervously.
" I.... I don't know how to word this... it'll make you mad..." He said to himself.
I instantly stiffed up. Suddenly nervous.
" Spit it out Harry." I said quietly with no volume.
" Ava.... I know I told you that I was ok... with you and Ferret face....." Harry said with a disgusted face." I just don't... I don't like... I ..."
" Harry, please spit it out." I said snarling a little bit.
" I won't go back on what I said... I'll let you two be... ick... ugh I hate saying this... I'll let you two be a couple... ugh... but I don't like him... you could do so much better, you deserve so much better than him."
" How did you know.....? How did you know we were a couple?" I whispered in astonishment.
" Ava, Please." He said giving me a disbelieving look " It's not that hard to figure out...Not only is my mind linked to your's, but I'm extremely observant when it comes to you."
I nodded in understandment. " Do you hate me?" I asked suddenly.
" I could never hate you, Ava. I love you. I don't like him.... not in the least. I think you deserve better, but I won't come between the two of you. It's your decision if you choose to go out with a ferret." Harry sighed.
" Good. 'Cause I really like him." I said taking a sneak peek toward Draco who was staring intently between Harry and I, whose head was centimeters from mine, due to our quiet conversation.
" Gross." Harry gagged " And don't expect me to be any nicer to him just because you two are having a fling."
" We aren't having a fling!" I said aggrevatedly.
" Sure, sure." Harry said while pulling away and going back to his food. He was signaling that our conversation was over.
I growled. I was not having a fling with Draco.
" Don't forget.... tomorrow after classes." Harry said smiling at me to get me to lighten up.
I sighed still a bit miffed and said " I won't Harry."