Chapter 12-
May 26th, 2013
Kellins POV:
"Are you sure you don't want me to teach you how to drive? Because you're in high school, and in this time people your age drive. Like Vic." Kevin said.
"Well i'm not gonna be in 'this time' for much longer, so what does it matter?" I said, putting air quotes around 'this time'. I saw Jaime use air quotes once and it seemed to amuse everyone so I figured I could try it and maybe it will work. I rolled my eyes and frowned at the words I had just said. It's not like I wanted to leave this time period anytime soon, but was it really my choice?
We pulled up to Vic's house and I got out of the car, "I'll ask Vic to drive me home." I said. Kevin gave me a thumbs up sign as he drove off. I walked up to the door and knocked on it. Mike opened it up blasting music on his phone.
"Hey Kellin." he said.
"Hey." I answered back cheerfully.
"Vic's upstairs." he said pointing upwards.
"Thanks." I said. I walked up the stairs and tried to locate Vic's room. I heard commotion in one room so I opened the door. It was Vic's room. I walked into the room and closed the door. Vic wasn't in his room but there was a door connecting to it. I'm guessing it's like, the bathroom or something. I heard noise coming from inside the door.
"Vic?" I said. The noise and commotion stopped for a second then continued. It sounded like he was crying. I heard the soft whimpers and it made me really nervous. I walked to the door and turned the door knob. When I walked in Vic looked up. His eyes got wide when he saw me. I looked down at his arm that he was holding out in front of him. As I took a closer look at his arm I gasped and put my hand over my mouth, with my eyes as wide as they could get.
There was blood streaming down from the horizontal lines on his arm. He had a sharp blade-like object in his other hand, which also had blood on it. There was also blood splattered around the sink. Seeing all this blood reminded me of war times, where I was originally from. I started tearing up and when I looked at Vic he had already been crying, and judging by his face he had been crying for a while.
"Kellin....I...what are you doing here?" he asked.
"You told me to come over... but Vic what are you doing? What the fuck is this?" I asked. I started crying and he tried stepping towards me, but I backed up.
"Babe, don't be scared, i'm sorry." he said. He looked like he was dizzy from the blood loss.
"We will talk about it after I stop the bleeding." I said. Without any thought, I rushed over to him and ran his arm under the water. He screamed a bit, i'm guessing because of the pain. "Do you have a first-aid kit?" I asked.
"Under the sink." he said. I opened the cabinet under the sink and pulled out a box that said 'First-Aid' in big, orange letters. I knew exactly what to do because when with my dad, he would sometimes teach me how to save people when they were injured.
I opened the box and took out a bandage wrap. I took out the disinfectant spray and quickly sprayed it on Vic's arm. He cried a little more do to the pain. I wrapped the bandage wrap around his arm. When it was fully covering his wounds, I tied it up and looked into his glassy-looking eyes. I have never had to deal with something like this before. I have with the injuries, but self-harm and the pain I saw in Vic's eyes.
***VIC'S POV:
"How..... how did you know how to do that?" I asked, sniffling from my crying.
"I don't really know much about a lot of things..... but I know a lot about injures. But it doesn't matter. You're okay." he said. He grabbed me and hugged me. I could hear him crying even more which made me break out in tears.
I didn't want to tell Kellin about this, because I didn't want him to get worried. I never really said anything about this to anyone. But there was a lot of shit going on in my life. Mostly bullying. I was made fun of for being gay, all the time. Sometimes people would even beat me up. Mike and the rest of the guys knew, but I never wanted to tell Kellin. He's too innocent. I mean like, if he found out he would try to play the role of the heroic boyfriend and he might get himself hurt. I wasn't expecting him to do that.
He didn't seem like the kind of person that would get bullied. All the stories he told me about his old town made it seem like no one really cared about what he did. I wish that was my life. The first time I came out, it was to this guy that was supposedly my friend and he told everyone about it. And for some reason, people hated on me for it.
"It's okay Kellin." I said
"No! It's not okay! I thought I lost you!" he said.
"You wouldn't have lost me. I have done this before." I admitted. He pulled out of the hug and looked at me.
"How many times have you done this?" he said seriously. I frowned and let out a sigh. "How many fucking times have you done this?!" he yelled. It scared me a lot, to be honest. I never imagined Kellin to scream like that.
"I don't know. There's been to many times." I said. Kellin started crying even more. He paced back and forth like four times and then he stopped and looked at me.
"Why would you do it?" he whispered.
"You wouldn't understand." I said.
"Maybe I won't, but I want to. So please, just tell me." he said.
"Fine." I said. There was a pause before I spoke again, "Have you ever been made fun of, for like, what you are?" I asked.
"What do you mean?" he asked, raising a brow.
"Like, gay. Has anyone ever hurt you because of it?" I asked.
"Well, I never really told anyone." he shrugged.
"Well, I have been hurt and beat and made fun of for it. I tried to keep it from you so you wouldn't..... you know..... act like this." I explained.
"Well I did." he said angrily.
"I was also kind of embarrassed." I said.
"But why would doing this help you?" he asked.
"Because I feel like it's my fault! It's my fault for all the shit that happens! So doing this helps me escape the emotional pain." I yelled.
"It's not your fucking fault, Vic! You're gay! You are who you are! Are you not proud of that? Because i'm proud of it! I'm proud that you came out about it! Do you hate yourself for being gay?" he yelled.
"No, but if I wasn't then none of this would've happened." I said, tears still flowing down my face.
"Vic, no one should do this to you just because of who you are. And don't you dare change for people to like you. It's not like you will be with these people for the rest of your life. And if you change just because they want you to, you will regret it." he said. For an innocent, clueless boy, he knew just what to say.
"I'm sorry Kellin. I'm so so so sorry. Please forgive me." I begged. I still had my friends, but I couldn't have Kellin leave me. He was amazing.
"Vic. Just promise me you'll never do it again?" Kellin said. I looked up at him in surprise.
"Kellin...."
"Tell me you will never fucking do this again! This could really hurt you and you could cut a vein and possibly die!" he yelled.
"Well maybe i'm better like that!" I yelled. His angry face turned into a face of surprise. His eyes widened as he stared at me for a second. Before I could say anything, Kellin filled the space in between us and crashed his lips into mine. He put his hands on my cheeks and aggressively let his tongue explore my mouth. I returned the enthusiasm, but I was still wondering why he was doing this. He pulled back and looked at me.
"Please Vic..... don't ever say that. Ever. Please. I never want to hear you say that again. Do you know how many people would be upset if you died? I would be mortified." he whispered. He was crying harder then I was.
"Please Vic." he whispered once more.
"Okay." I whispered back to him. He hugged me tightly and cried on my shoulder. I tried to make him feel better by calming him down, "Shhh." I said, stroking his beautiful black hair. "It's gonna be okay." I said,
"I should be saying that you." he whispered in my ear. I chuckled a little at that comment.
"I'm sorry Kellin." I said.
"I forgive you. But don't scare me like that ever agin, okay?" he asked.
"I won't. I promise." I said. There was a moment of silence. "Kellin?"
"Yea?"
"Can we cuddle in my bed?" I asked. I really needed that right now.
"Sure." he said. We walked into the bedroom part of his room and we got under the blanket of his bed. I shifted around so I was faced with him. He looked into my eyes and I felt his arm slither up to my waist and wrap around it. He pulled me closer as I put my arm around his waist, a little higher up than his.
I kissed him softly and gently. He tensed up and then relaxed on my lips and kissed me back. I stopped the kiss and looked at him. He was so god damn adorable. And he was mine..... my boyfriend. "How did I get so lucky?" I said.
"What?" he asked. His cluelessness was so cute.
"You. How did I get so lucky as to have you." I said. He smiled and pecked my lips.
"It's not you that got lucky. It was me." he whispered. I moved my body closer to him so I could rest my forehead on his. We both closed our eyes. I moved my hand up and down his back so I could comfort him. I opened my eyes to see his reaction, and he was smiling warmly. It was so cute. After like, 10 minutes I decided to speak again.
"Kellin?"
"Yea?"
"Will you stay here for the night?" I said.
"Of course. I want to make sure you're gonna be okay." he said.
"Thanks babe." I said.
"I'm gonna tell Kevin that i'm staying here." Kellin said. He picked up his phone and started texting Kevin. After that was finished we spent the entire night in my bed. Just cuddling, and kissing and being all romantic.