Around nine thirty, I wake. I go downstairs, the kids still asleep.
All the girls are already down here. The blanket is half off of Tyler, flashing one of his ass cheeks.
I sigh, staring at him.
"You're not gonna fix it?" Delaney asks.
"No." I say, sitting down with them on the fireplace ledge. We're all in our PJ's.
I open the blinds.
The girls start laughing.
I sit back down on the ledge to the fireplace.
And we wait.
Around ten minutes later, I hear a low groan.
I grin.
Shaun moves his arm, lifting his hand to his forehead.
"What the fuck." He moans.
"There's a bucket at your feet." I say loudly.
"Ow." He grumbles. "Shut up, Carmen."
He leans over the couch, picking up the bucket.
He throws up.
"Holy shit." Blake mutters. "Holy fucking hell."
He too, throws up in his bucket.
Slowly, they all start waking.
We each take care of our own husbands, so they've cleaned the buckets and given them back and given them coffee and medicine.
Tyler is still out cold.
I wait.
The house is silent.
Tyler moves his head first, and then his arm.
"Ow." He mutters. "Owwwww."
I watch, not moving.
He lifts his head, and then he opens his eyes, looking at his body. "Why am I naked?" he asks loudly.
"Shut the fuck up." Cooper mutters.
"I'm naked." He sounds confused. "I think I might throw up."
"There's a bucket." Cooper grumbles.
Tyler peers over the edge of the couch.
He pukes into his bucket. When he stops, he rests his cheek against the couch.
"Why am I naked?" he asks. "What happened last night?"
Everyone looks at me expectantly.
I say nothing.
He looks at Cooper.
"Coop." he says. "Why am I naked? Where's Carmen?"
He grabs the blanket lazily, pulling it over his ass.
"I don't fucking know."
"Did I sleep with somebody?" he mutters. "I'll kill myself. I will kill myself. I'm going to kill myself."
There's a short pause.
"CARMEN?" he yells.
"Shut the fuck up!" Blake yells, throwing his phone at Tyler. He dodges it, and it clatters to the floor.
Tyler sits up.
"I need to find her. I gotta find her."
I walk into the kitchen, getting him coffee and advil.
It's too bright in here. He probably can't see.
He's panicked and I know his head hurts. I yank the blinds shut, leaning over the back of the couch. He turns around.
Silently, I hand him his coffee and his meds.
He drinks thirstily, downing his pills.
"Why am I naked?" he asks.
I sigh.
"Just drink your coffee, Tyler."
"No." he says. "Why am I naked? Carmen, why am I naked?" he's panicked.
"Relax." I say. "You're fine, okay?"
"But why am I naked?" he whispers. "Did I cheat on you?"
"No." I shake my head.
"I didn't?" he asks, relieved.
"No."
"Okay." He looks scared, but he drinks his coffee. "I love you." He mumbles. "Where's my underwear?"
"On the ground." I say.
He leans over the edge of the couch, peering at his boxers on the floor.
"Why am I naked?" he mumbles. "Did I drive home?"
"No." I say.
He looks afraid, but he pulls his boxers on, laying on his stomach, face down. He lets the blanket drop to the ground, and I can't help but stare at the curvature of his ass.
I pick up his puke bucket, dumping it in the toilet, holding my breath. I flush it and go outside, spraying it with the hose.
I set his bucket back down.
"Why was I naked?" he asks.
"What happened last night?" Shaun mutters.
Nobody replies.
"Somebody answer!" Blake says.
I grab the camera, connecting it to the TV.
I turn the volume down enough so it doesn't hurt their ears.
It starts in the living room.
"This was at four in the morning." I say quietly.
They all watch Tyler scream into the phone, the Uber ride, and then Shaun picking me up and running me across the parking lot, all of them in their underwear, Tyler screaming at people, refusing to give me the keys, yelling at me any time I did something, Shaun picking me up and running me across the parking lot, him reaching me for and me body slamming him against the Land Rover, them throwing me into the lake, me calling Delaney, manhandling Tyler into the car, and all of them, Tyler putting it in park on the interstate, us getting home, Tyler going pee and refusing to let me follow him, yelling at me to go find myself, all the guys in their bed, Tyler ripping his pants off, me yelling at him, him climbing onto the couch, refusing to sleep until I go find myself, and then me saying okay, and then it turns black.
Everyone is dead silent.
"We threw you into a lake." Tyler mutters.
"Yeah." I say. "You threw me into a fucking lake."
"I'm sorry." He mumbles.
"I'm sorry too." Shaun says.
They all start muttering apologies.
"I'm not mad. I was, but I'm not now."
Tyler looks at me.
"Why?" he asks.
"Because, even in your drunken state, you wouldn't let anybody touch you. Not even me. You thought that I was somebody else. You threw your drink on somebody because she tried to grab at you. So no, I'm not mad."
There's a short pause.
"That was hot." Tyler mutters.
"How?" I ask.
"You manhandled me. That was sexy. You're sexy."
I roll my eyes.
"Go back to sleep. You're hungover."
"Lay down with me." he says.
"No." I say.
"Yes." He begs.
"I can't." I say. "Really."
"Just for a while. Until one of the kids wakes. Please?" he begs.
I sigh.
"I'll be right back."
I go upstairs, putting on black sweatpants, a bra, and a loose gray t-shirt, and I grab him sweatpants, going downstairs.
I hand them to him. He pulls them on.
"Lay with me." he whines.
So I give in, and I get on the couch with him. He wraps me into his arms, burying his face in my neck.
"You smell like Jesus. My Jesus."
<><>
Around noon, all the kids were awake and fed, and all the hangovers faded, so now everyone went home, and now Tyler and the kids and I are at the grocery store after I made the list.
We follow the list. I scribble things off as we go.
"Emily, do you see where the sign that says bread is?" I ask.
"No Momma. I can't read any of the signs."
I look at her.
"What?" I ask.
She shrugs.
"It's blurry."
I can't see the signs either, because I haven't been to the eye doctor since I was eighteen.
My glasses and my contacts are completely out of prescription.
It's gotten so bad that I just go blurry because the prescription is so off that it gives me a headache.
Tyler wandered off because I asked him to get milk.
He reads the signs.
"You really can't see them?" I ask.
"No." Emily says.
I sigh.
"Alright."
I don't bother asking the twins, and Ethan and Declan are with Tyler.
They're two. I know they can't read it.
"Why haven't you moved?" Tyler asks, coming back with the milk.
I shrug.
He narrows his eyes.
I haven't mentioned my vision to Tyler because I know he'll make me to go the doctor.
"What's next?" he asks.
"Bread." I say.
"Alright, where is it?" he asks.
"Uh..." I trail off.
He knows.
"Where is it?" he repeats.
I shrug.
He sighs.
"You need to make an appointment, Carmen." He says. "Why didn't you ask Emily? She's eight."
I shrug again.
"I can't see it." Emily shrugs.
Tyler looks down at her.
"You can't see it?" he repeats.
"No. Is that bad?"
"No." Tyler says. "Ethan, can you find the sign that says bread?"
Ethan looks up at the signs.
"I don't know Daddy, it's kinda hard."
"Alright Dec, what about you?"
Declan looks up.
"No." he says. "I can't see it."
Tyler nods, glancing at me.
"We're fine." I say.
<><>
Later that night, when the kids are in bed, I get out of the shower, dressed, and walk into the bedroom, and Tyler is standing, digging through my dresser.
"What are you doing?" I ask.
"Looking." He says.
"For?" I ask.
"Your glasses. You keep them in the dresser."
"Oh, I haven't seen those in years." I wave him off, climbing in bed.
"What?" he asks.
"Yeah, I haven't seen them since we left Florida. I think I left them at the penthouse."
He sighs.
"You need to make an appointment."
"Nah." I wave him off. "I can see fine."
He nods, picking up a notebook.
He gets a black marker, writing something, and then he crosses the room to the fireplace.
He holds up the notebook.
"What does it say?" he asks.
I sigh.
"I'm tired." I say. I lay down.
"Carmen." He says.
"I don't know, okay? I can't read it."
"When is the last time you had an eye appointment?"
"Uh, I think I was eighteen." I admit.
"Well, you had one when Emily was an infant, remember?"
I nod. Now that I think about it, I do remember.
He puts the notebook away, climbing into bed with me.
"All four of you need eye appointments." He says.
"I'm not getting one, Tyler." I mumble against his chest.
"Yes you are." He says.
"No I'm not."
"Carmen, how do you even drive?" he laughs.
I bite my lip.
"I look at the colors. I know the area!"
"What if you're driving somewhere you've never been."
"Then I listen to the GPS." I say.
"And if the GPS doesn't work?"
"Then I call you because that means I'm lost."
"What if your phone is dead." He says.
"Then I sit on the side of the road until I'm marked as a missing person." I shrug. "Then somebody will find me."
He starts laughing.
"You're impossible. What if everyone you knew was dead?" he asks. "Nobody would know you're missing."
"I'll kill myself before I'm alone without you."
He nuzzles against me.
"Drama queen." He mumbles.
The way we're laying, his arm is under my head and his left hand is on my bare hip. I have panties on, but it's a thong.
He's gripping me.
I am very easily horny when I'm on my period.
I roll in his arms, facing him. The light is still on. I peer at him, into his eyes. His hand is on my side now, his thumb touching the bottom of my breast.
"I really," I begin. "I want sex." I whisper. "I want you so badly it hurts. It aches."
He just stares at me, searching my eyes.
Just the thought of him gets me going. My nipples are hard, and I can feel the heat in my abdomen pooling into my panties.
I'm on my fucking period. It's going into a pad.
I want him to put his hand down there.
"Do you want to have sex?" he whispers.
His hand is now moving up and down my side, up my hip, back down the curvature of my body, to the side of my breast.
"Yes." I breathe.
Even him moving his hand on my body feels good.
"But we can't." I sigh.
"I'll gladly get back into the shower." He murmurs.
"I can't." I shake my head. "I won't."
"Okay." He whispers. "I understand."
He leans down, kissing my lips.
I pull away from him, scooting back, out of his arms.
Moaning, I flop onto my stomach, putting my pillow over my head.
I hear his chuckle, and then the clicking of the lamp next to me.
He rustles around in bed, and then he stills.
I lay there, under the pillow, miserable.
He keeps moving around and then after a long time, he sighs.
"Are you awake?" he asks.
"Yes." I grumble.
He doesn't reply.
"Why?" I ask.
I hear him get up.
I peek my head out from under the pillow.
"Why are you going in there?" I ask.
"Because my dick is hard."
"Wait!" I sit up, fast. "Let me suck it!"
"What?" he asks, turning around.
He's filly erect.
"Let me suck it!"
"No." he says.
"Why not?" I whine.
"Because then you get nothing."
"I'll use the showerhead." I say.
"No." he says. "I'm not letting you suck it. Now when I can't touch you."
He goes into the bathroom and shuts the door.
I whine loudly, getting up, I follow him.
"Carmen." He says, warning.
"Please?" I beg.
"I want to fuck in the shower." He says. "And besides, you don't even know how to use the showerhead. You've never masturbated."
He's right. I know he is.
I cross my arms, stubborn.
"Let me suck it."
He leans his forehead against the wall.
"No." he says.
It sounds revolting, but I've been so horny lately and Tyler is erect and I'm way more sensitive on my period to everything.
"Carmen." He whispers. "Get out. Please, please get out."
Instead, I take my pad off, throwing it away, and then I turn the shower on, grabbing his hair, I pull his lips onto mine, backing us up, fully clothed into the water. It's still cold. It hasn't even heated up yet. He pulls the door shut, backing me against the wall, his lips moving frantically against mine. I let go of his hair, my hands in fists around him.
He grabs onto my hair, yanking my head back.
Rough.
He's being rough.
His lips move to my neck, licking and biting and sucking.
It's the most alluring thing in the world, how rough he's being.
He bites down on my shoulder. I moan loudly, gasping.
"Don't wake the children." He growls, roughly grabbing my breast through my shirt.
<><>
I could kill Tyler.
Last night we had sex four times in the shower, and I couldn't even get in bed after.
My legs were shaking so badly
I forced Tyler to drive the kids to school because my neck is covered in hickeys and bite marks.
Literal bite marks, along with my shoulder.
Mom just happened to insist today that we come to her house.
Everyone.
I yelled at Tyler for an hour for giving me so many marks.
I'm completely coated in so much makeup, but luckily, you can't tell.
I walk into Mom and Dad's living room.
Tyler has a long sleeve shirt on because there's so many scratch marks on him.
Everyone sits down.
I sit, wincing.
"What's up with you?" Frankie asks.
"Nothing." I say.
Tyler plops down next to me.
"Are you okay?" Mom asks. "You look...uncomfortable."
They thighs hurt so badly, it feels like I've had sex for the first time, but it was rough.
It's very painful.
Tyler feels horrible. He keeps apologizing.
"I'm fine." I say.
"Bullshit." Delaney says. "What's wrong with you?"
"Nothing." I say. I attempt to cross my legs, wincing again.
"What's wrong with her?" Blake asks Tyler.
He bites his lip.
"Nothing, she's fine." he says.
I move my hair to hide my neck, just in case I missed a few spots.
"What are you doing?" Delaney asks.
"I'm moving, what the fuck." I grumble.
"Come here." She says.
I stand up, following her out of the living room.
She walks with me to the kitchen.
"What's your problem?"
Caroline followed, and Ari, Frankie, and Miranda.
"Nothing." I say.
"Why are you wincing?" Delaney demands.
"I'm not wincing."
She rolls her eyes, getting a cup of water.
"Oh." She nods. "So you won't mind if I do this."
She throws the cup of water on me.
Oh dear god.
I look down, my shirt starting to stain with the makeup on my neck.
Their faces fill with horror.
"What the hell?" Delaney demands. "What happened to you?"
Panicked, embarrassed, I put my hands around my neck, and I run out the front door.
"Carmen!" Caroline calls from the step.
Delaney
I storm into the living room.
"What did you do to her?" I ask.
"Why? What did she tell you?" he stands up.
"She's got...finger marks!"
"What?" Mr. Schuler asks.
Everyone starts getting up.
Tyler shoves past me, outside. Caroline running after Car, who's running for her fucking life.
Shaun grabs the front of my shirt.
"What did you do to my sister?" he asks, angry.
"Relax." He says. "They're not fingerprints."
"Did you rape her?" Delaney demands.
"Are you fucking kidding me, Delaney?" he snaps.
"Alright, let's all calm down." Cooper says. "Seriously, Tyler doesn't hurt people, especially not Carmen."
"How do you know?" I shoot back.
Tyler
Shaun is still holding onto me.
"Let me go talk to her." Cooper says.
"No. You're his brother. You can't." she says.
"Shaun, let go of me. You know I wouldn't hurt her. Come on."
Shaun looks at me, hesitating, and then he lets go of my shirt.
"You can't go talk to her." She says. "You fucking scum."
She stands in front of me.
I jump to the right, and she moves to the right to block me, and then I dart around her.
"No!" she screams.
I run, and I hear her sprinting after me.
I rush past Caroline, reaching Carmen first. I grab her hand gently.
Carmen turns, her hands hiding her next.
"He hurt you!" Delaney says, angry. "Let's go, or I'm calling the police!"
"It's sex, Delaney." She snarls. "Rough, hot, sweaty shower sex. If you actually had sex, you'd fucking know." She drops her hands.
Delaney hesitates, swiping Carmen's hair out of the way.
"Bite marks." She whispers. "And hickey's. Holy shit."
"Go away." Carmen hisses.
Shaun
I can see the marks from here.
They're definitely fingerprints.
I walk across the driveway, everyone following me.
He hurt my fucking sister, and I'm going to kick his ass.
I walk up to them, swinging at Tyler. He ducks out of the way.
"No, stop!" Carmen says, shoving me.
When Carmen and I were younger, we used to fight a lot.
We've gotten into full on fist fights. Carmen has thrown shit at me, shattered things on my head.
We fight. We yell.
But I'm already mad at Tyler, and when she shoves me, I lose it, shoving her back.
Tyler
Next thing I know, Shaun's shoving my wife. She falls, and Shaun pins her to the ground. Everyone is screaming.
He starts raising his fist, and I lose it.
I grab the back of the neck of his shirt, yanking him off of her like he's a piece of dust. I hear him choking from his shirt, but I don't give a flying fuck.
I lean down, and in one quick movement, I grab Carmen's hips, lifting her up, standing her on her feet.
Blindly, I pull the keys from my pocket. She's shaking, and her palms are bleeding. Her chest rises and falls rapidly.
"Go to the car." I say. She opens her mouth to argue. "I'm not asking." I say quietly, looking at her.
She closes her mouth, taking the keys.
"He's my brother." She whispers, and she walks away.
Your brother just almost kicked your fucking ass.
I glare at Shaun, pointing at him.
"You stay the hell away from her." I whisper, taking a step closer to him. "I don't give a flying fuck who you are. I don't fucking care if you're Jesus. You stay the hell away from her."
It takes all of my strength not to put him in a coma.
He doesn't say anything, he just glares at me.
I start to walk away, but I stop, turning around. They're all watching.
"Hickies." I say, my voice low, calm. "I would never lay a hand on her. They're fucking hickies and bite marks."