"Sunshine, you have to come to this." Tyler says, following me downstairs.
I sigh.
"I know, I know." I say, tripping on a toy at the bottom of the stairs.
I catch myself with my hands, picking up the toy, tossing it to the side.
"Somebody needs to take Emly to gymnastic, Tyler."
"Let my Mom do it." He says.
"No, I can't rely on our parents for everything." I say, passing Declan, who is six years old now. He's all dressed in his little league outfit. Ethan is at track.
"Mom, we need to go." Emily says.
"I know, hold on." I say.
It's been two years.
Only two years. I'm thirty three, and my life is complete chaos.
Toys litter the house, it's impossible to get somewhere on time.
And to get all five kids in the car?
It's insane.
Noah and Nathan are playing in their diapers, two years old, giggling and laughing.
Emily is eight, Ethan is seven, Declan is six, and the twins are two.
"Momma, please, if I'm late again, I might have to sit bench." Declan sighs.
"Carmen." Tyler insists.
"Alright, okay." I sigh, thinking.
I wish I could be five places at once.
I have to drop Emily off for gymnastics from 3:30 to 6:30, I have to pick up Ethan from practice at four, and then I need to bring Declan to his baseball game, which is from 4:00 and it'll probably end around fifty twenty or five thirty.
Tuesdays are my least favorite days because all the kids have plans.
Emily has gymnastics every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday, Declan has Baseball every Tuesday, Thursday, and Saturday, and Ethan has basketball every Tuesday and Thursday and Friday.
It's Tuesday.
"Momma, please." Emily sighs. "I can't be late."
All the kids start talking at once, how they can't be late, how they need to be there on time, and then Noah starts crying because Nathan took his toy, and Tyler starts insisting that I come to Declan's game.
"Alright!" I yell over them. "Emily, go get in the car. Nathan, don't take things from your brother, and Tyler, I'll be there, alright, I'm just trying to do this!"
Tyler has to take Declan to baseball.
When people used to say that you get more unafraid when you have the next kid, I always thought they were wrong.
Now I have five, and I have literally reached into Noah's mouth while he was choking, swiped the cracker out of his throat, and put him in the car seat.
I've handed the kids off to strangers while I go pee places.
It's almost summer. Only two more weeks.
Declan is in kindergarten, Ethan is in first, and Emily is in second.
I pick up Noah, pulling Nathan with me. Tyler follows with Declan.
We sold the Mustang.
We had to. We needed two big cars, so now we have a Range Rover with seen seats, and a Land Rover with seven seats. The Range Rover is mine and the Land Rover is mine.
I buckle the twins into their car seats in the front.
"Please Carmen, Declan really wants you there." Tyler begs. "You said you'd be there the last three times."
"I'll be there." I say.
"Alright." He kisses my lips. "Drive safe. I love you."
"I love you too." I sigh.
In the middle row I have Declan's booster seat in the middle, Noah on his left, and Nathan on his right. Ethan is in the back right, and Emily is in the back left. I peek back there to make sure she's buckled, and she is.
Tyler has the same arrangement in the Land Rover.
I start the Range Rover, backing out before Tyler has even started the Land Rover.
I drive to Emily's gymnastics.
I hate that Tyler has to beg me to come to Declan's games.
I want to be there, but Declan is never ready, and then something will happen with one of the kids, where a twin will puke, Emily will get hurt, Ethan will take forever getting ready.
My life is hectic, but I wouldn't trade anything.
I love my life. I love my children.
I just get stressed.
At least I've managed to keep my body up. I work out when the kids are at school. I have the start of abs, and I've got the kids eating healthy.
I stop the car outside Emily's gymnastics, parking. I get out, unclipping Nathan's car seat from the base. Emily climbs over the seat. I put the seat back into the car, shaking it gently to make sure it's stable. I kiss Nathan's forehead when he grins at me.
"I love you baby." I smile.
I turn to Emily who is standing in her pink leotard and a pair of jean shorts and flip flops. Her long wavy brown hair is up in the ponytail I put it in when she was getting dressed.
"Okay, bye sweetheart, I love you."
"I love you too." She says. She wraps her arms around my waist. I crouch down to hug her properly. I kiss her cheek. "Bye."
She turns around and walks inside, her gym back over her shoulder.
I wait until she comes back to the door and gives me the thumbs up to tell me she's okay. I nod, waving at her, and then I get back in the Range Rover and drive to the elementary school.
Ethan does track at school with his friends. When he gets out of school, he goes to the PE court and they go to track. It's a really good track team. He does track from 2:30 till four.
I pull up to the school at four on the dot, sitting in the car circle.
The car circle is empty.
"Momma!" Noah squeals.
"Yes baby?" I ask, twisting in my seat to look at him.
He giggles.
"Hi!"
"Hi sweetheart." I smile. I reach over and pat his leg.
At 4:15, I see Ethan and some of his friends enter the car circle.
He says goodbye to them.
I see him with a girl, and he's holding her hand.
He kisses her cheek, and she's giggling.
He walks over to the car, opening the passenger door.
"Hi Momma." He smiles.
"Hi." I say, suspicious.
Using my phone, I sneak a picture of the girl.
"Just sit in Declan's seat for now." I say.
"Alright." He says, climbing over the middle console into the back. He sits in Declan's seat. I watch as he buckles his seatbelt.
Lord, please let me get to Declan's game without any problems.
I drive cautiously.
When I make it to the baseball field, I could scream with joy.
I get out, freeing Noah and Nathan from their car seats.
Ethan climbs out.
The game is just starting.
I sigh in relief, holding Noah and Nathan's hands, telling Ethan to walk in front of me. I lock the car and follow Ethan.
He walks to the bleachers.
We scan around for Tyler.
He left seats open in front row.
I walk up to him. He smiles.
I see Declan look at us through the fence, and he's grinning. I smile, waving at him. He's hitting, he tightens his grip on the bat.
"Your son has a girlfriend." I whisper to Tyler.
He looks at me.
"What?" he asks.
I pull up the photo of the little girl on my phone.
"This is her." I zoom in. "He was holding her hand. He kissed her cheek."
"Carmen, you took a photo of a little girl." He whispers.
"She's dating my son!" I whisper.
He smiles.
"We'll talk later." He says, kissing my cheek.
I sigh, nodding, and pay attention to the game.
People tease me about being a soccer Mom, but I'm not worried.
I am a major soccer Mom.
I yell when Declan hits the ball, me and Tyler screaming from the bleachers.
Ethan is playing with Noah and Nathan, and I watch as he points to toys and asks what color it is.
A kid gets him out when he's halfway off third, almost to home base.
"No!" I yell. "You stupid rag, let him get the homerun!" I stand up, throwing popcorn at the fence.
"Hey!" a man behind me says. "That's my son you're calling a stupid rag!"
I whip around.
"That's because he is a stupid rag!" I yell at him.
"Don't call my kid a stupid rag!" he stands up.
"Then teach your child to-"
"Alright," Tyler says, laughing. "I'm sorry about my wife. She's...special." He yanks me back to my seat. "Sunshine, you can't call six year old's stupid rags."
I cross my arms.
"Maybe if your kid was better, he'd have made the homerun." The guy grumbles.
Tyler whips around.
"My kid let your kid off! He's going easy! He's the best player on that field!" Tyler yells at him.
"Yeah!" I say.
The guy stands up.
"Tell your son to up his game! It's going to take a lot for him to beat my boy!"
"Declan!" Tyler says. "Stop being easy! You can do this!"
I watch as it goes around the clock.
Declan gets to the front.
This hit decides the final score.
This decides it.
The score is tied 20-20.
I hold my breath.
"Come on Declan." I say. "You can do this."
The kid throws the ball. It's a shit throw. Declan doesn't swing.
"Strike one." The announcer says.
The kid throws again.
Declan doesn't swing.
"Strike two." The announcer says.
The entire field is silent.
The kid throws.
Declan swings.
The ball goes flying. Decan drops his bat, running.
"Yes!" I scream. "Go! Go!"
The other guys punk ass child is running after the bal.
It hits the fence.
Second base now.
"Come on!" Tyler yells.
Third base.
The guys stupid kid gets the ball.
"GET THAT BOY OUT! GET HIM OUT!" the guy is screaming behind us.
I stand up.
"LET'S GO DECLAN!" I yell.
Declan keeps running, and the other guys kid throws the ball.
Declan dives against the ground, the ball missing him by a millimeter.
The second after Declan's hand hits home plate, the kid touches his shoulder.
I stare, shocked.
"And Southampton wins 21-20!"
I start screaming.
"Yes!" I cheer. "You did it!"
The whole team goes running to Declan, hugging him.
Declan is grinning from ear to ear.
The team is chanting his name.
I grin at the guy.
"That," I breathe. "Is my son."
The kids exit the dugout.
"I did it Momma! I did it!" Declan grins, running for us.
"Yes!" I smile. "You did!" I crouch down, hugging him "You did so good. I'm so proud of you!"
He smiles, happy.
People start taking their kids and leaving.
A woman taps me on the shoulder.
"You came here with two toddlers, right? And another boy?"
"Yeah." I say.
"Well, they're gone." She frowns, walking away.
I whip around.
Noah, Nathan, and Ethan have wandered off.
"Oh god." I breathe. "Tyler, they're gone."
He picks up Declan, rushing around the fields with me.
<><>
I called the police.
I had no choice.
When Declan's team found out, they stayed and waited.
Mom picked up Emily for me, and our family is here with us, and Declan's team.
Delaney gave birth to a baby girl and she and Blake got a divorce, and Blake fought her hard. The baby girl was born with an addiction to meth, and they fixed her, and now Delaney gets the kids for one week but only in the summers.
I've been freeing out for the last two hours.
It's 9:30 now, and I refuse to leave the ball park.
Somebody snatched them.
I know they did because police officers are searching the area, and I already looked everywhere. Tyler has been sitting with his head in his hands, and Declan is sitting next to me, holding my hand.
The cops found Noah and Nathan's clothes in a pile on the side of the road, along with two full diapers. He asked if they were theirs, and I started crying.
I stare numbly at the backpack sitting on the ground.
Ethan's backpack.
My babies.
Emily is sitting on the bleachers next to Declan.
"Mommy, are they gonna find my bubba's?" she asks quietly.
Emily knows how to say brother's, but she doesn't.
She's been calling them Bubba's since she first started talking.
"I hope so." I say quietly.
It's pitch black now, and the only sound is people sighing, and the occasional sound of a police car passing.
I already tried to go out looking, but I didn't find them, and Tyler made me come back.
A car door shuts in the parking lot.
We all look over there.
"Oh dear god." Blake mutters.
I can't see who it is.
I look away, upset.
My babies.
"Come on children." A voice says.
I tense.
I haven't heard that voice in two years.
Blake ducks down.
A moment later, Delaney walks up.
"Uh, I found three kids wandering the street." She says, not really recognizing us. "And the oldest looks familiar, and uh, he said he was at his brother's baseball game. He won't tell me his name. The other two are in diapers, and I was hoping you guys knew anything about some random kids..." she trails off.
She's really fit now. She was just skinny before, but she's muscle now. Her blonde hair is long.
She's beautiful.
"You found them." Blake stands up.
"Blake?" she asks. "Why the heck-" she cuts off.
She looks around the bleachers, and her entire body pales.
"Oh." She whispers. "Did I find Ethan?" she asks.
"Yes." Blake says. "You found Ethan. You found Nathan, and you found Noah."
Delaney looks like she's going to burst into tears.
She's still wearing the wedding rings.
I stand up slowly, moving next to Delaney to look around the bleachers. I feel her eyes on me.
Nathan and Noah are butt ass naked.
"Momma!" Ethan says.
"What were you thinking?" I whisper. "Do you have any idea how worried I was! Ethan, we've been sitting here for hours hoping somebody didn't snatch you up!"
"I had to go potty, Momma, and I couldn't find the bathroom.
"You didn't ask!" I say. "You know better than to wander off!"
I feel a lump rising in my throat.
"Oh my god." I crouch down, crying now. "Come here, babies. I thought I lost you."
"I'm sorry Momma. You were watching Declan." He says.
The three of them walk into my arms. I hug them tightly.
Emily sighs
"Ethan, that was stupid!"
"Emily." Tyler stands up. "You are not his parent. Stop being bossy."
Emily is standing next to Delaney.
"Hi Aunt Delly." She says.
Delaney looks down at her. Her arms are crossed, and she's leaning against the fence.
I see so much pain in her eyes. She covers her mouth with her hand, taking a deep, shaky breath.
"Hi Emily." She says. She removes her hand, tears slowly sliding down her cheeks.
"Are you okay bro-thers?" Declan asks.
"We're okay Deccy." Ethan says.
Tyler hugs them.
Delaney clears her throat.
"They wandered into my bookstore on Main street." She says quietly. "I'm glad they're okay." She gives me a sad smile, and she walks away.
Everyone is off the bleachers now. Blake is staring after her.
We all are.
I watch her go.
I miss her so much sometimes it hurts.
"Go." Blake says. "I know you want to go talk to her. Go."
I look at Tyler. He gives me a sad smile.
"Go on." He kisses my cheek.
I stand up, jogging after Delaney. She reaches her car.
"Delaney." I say.
She stops, her car door open.
"Car." She whispers.
She's crying.
She's really, really crying.
I don't know what to even say to her.
"You have a bookstore." I say quietly.
She nods.
"Yeah, I uh, I needed something to make money." She says, smiling sadly.
I hesitate.
"You look well." I say.
"I spend my free time boxing." She says.
"Boxing?" I repeat. "That's a good thing for you."
"Yeah. Yeah, it is."
I'm quiet for a while.
"I was on meth, Carmen." She whispers. "I wasn't myself. Blake cheated on me." she whispers. "And I didn't...I liked the way Tyler treated you, and I was hacked up on drugs. God, I sound pathetic. I wouldn't forgive me. I swapped DNA samples. I tried to ruin your marriage. You should hate me. I hate me."
I study her for a long time.
"Blake cheated on you?"
"Yes!" she whispers. "And then he divorced me for adultery. He slept with some girl. When he was going to the city for the day for work, he was going there to sleep with her. I was up one night, four months pregnant, and I saw a text on his phone of a girl sending him nudes and she said because you asked for them and I went through the messages and he said that he only stayed with me because I'm the mother of his children. I broke, I was at the park the next day, and this guy offered me meth. I was there crying, so I accepted, and I got addicted. I saw how well Tyler was treating you, and I went crazy, and I tried to take him from you, and I'm sorry. I lost you, my family, my husband and my kids in a course of a few months. He doesn't take them to baseball games."
I look down.
"I didn't know."
"Yeah, well, nobody does. I promised Blake to go quietly, not because he asked me to, but for my kids."
I sigh.
"But now you're telling me." I whisper.
"I'm telling you because you're a soccer Mom. You bring your kids to sports. You have five kids. You have a family. Blake feeds them and takes them to school, but he's not raising them."
I realize she's right as I think to the last family function we had.
Cameron fell in the pool, and he's nine, and he didn't know how to swim.
Noah and Nathan are two and they know how to swim.
"I want to fight for my babies." She whispers.
"Sunshine?" Tyler calls. "I'm taking them home." He says. "It's late. They have school tomorrow. Do you want dibs on what kids to drive?"
"No uh, I'm gonna be a bit." I call. "Is that okay?"
"Yeah, that's fine." he says. "I love you. Drive safe!"
"I love you too!" I call.
He buckles the kids in, and just as he gets in the car, just as he reaches for the door, I remember something.
"Hey babe?" I call.
"Yeah?" Tyler calls back.
"When you put the kids to bed, Noah's baby blanket is on the slide outside. He left it out there after his nap and I forgot to grab it."
"Okay, thanks." He says.
He shuts the door to the Range Rover.
Delaney shuts her eyes.
"That is family." She whispers. "I want my babies. I've been sober for two years."
"Go back to the courts and fight." I say.
"How?" she laughs. "With what money? How am I gonna hire a lawyer? Blake took everything, including the money I got from my own business. He took my best friend, my kids-" she shakes her head. "Anyways, you've got kids to bathe and put to bed and lunches to pack. I'll get out of your hair." She opens her car door.
"Delaney..." I hesitate. "You know I don't like giving people money, but if you need anything, you know where I live."
She nods.
"Thank you."
I nod, hugging her.
She holds onto me, tightly.
"That is the first hug I've gotten since last summer." She whispers.