My Life As An Escort (The Beginning) Book 1 ~ (Completed)✅.

Chapter Thirty- Seven- Engagements and Reflections

Cadence POV

After putting on my clothes at the hotel, I came home and called Evan but unfortunately he didn't answer. I went to the wine chiller and poured myself a glass of wine. The white wine was smooth as it eased down my throat.

"Awe," I said as I twirled the liquid in the glass.

The house was empty so I just laid on the sofa, kicked my shoes off and turned the television on. One of the late night celebrity news shows was on. I was half paying attention until I saw a newsflash that Robert had proposed to some high society socialite name Bebbie Cartwright from Texas.

Of course she didn't look like me, but was the perfect type to suit his image. Ms. Perfect had long blonde hair, baby blue eyes and she looked like she could hula through a Cheerio. She looked older, mature, classy and polished. Of course I wasn't anything close to that.

The picture of them together looked forced. It wasn't love but probably more of a business transaction. Beb, as the newscaster called her, family owned a few oil wells and real estate. They showed them getting on a helicopter traveling to who knows where. He wasn't going to be happy. He would just keep going through life trying to figure out what he wanted.

It had finally dawned on me when I said those words, that I wanted him to give me himself, at that point his whole demeanor changed. I thought I had done something wrong but in fact I let myself fall for him. It was such an idiotic ideal. A young girl crush was what it was. The first man to show me some type of affection, I get all giggly eyed and think the world revolves around them.

Yes I am still young but I didn't have to be stupid. I had learned that once I chose this lifestyle I needed to be equip to roll with the punches. Until I left this world of indiscretions, I was what men wanted, a fantasy girl that would give them something that they couldn't find in a girlfriend or a wife, but a distraction from the real world. It was okay to live my life but I needed to keep my heart guarded. This was the time I should be getting to know the real Cadence not the one that had been walking around with her head in the clouds. This was the real world and in this world you either make it or you don't.

It was funny that I wasn't mad or jealous when I saw Robert on television with Beb. Just a little surprised. He didn't love her and she didn't love him. She would never give him the happiness that he wanted. It sucked to be him, but I still believed I could be happy. I had a feeling that maybe one day, I would find my Prince Charming. He would except me for me and the lifestyle I chose to live. I could still get my happily ever after, right?

Going to counseling had really helped. It was time for me to stand on my own two feet and take control. Starting when I woke up in the morning it would be a new day and a new attitude. I poured another glass of wine and leaned back on the sofa. They were showing the non-existence romance between Robert and Beb.

I watched as they held hands and walked red carpets of galas in Texas. They looked like night and day. I wondered if her stuff was dried up like the desert? I couldn't help but laugh. Maybe I needed to put the wine down.

I guess I knew deep down that things between Robert and I fizzled the night I left that hotel. I think I had grown attached to Robert maybe because he was older and I did feel safe with him, but deep down inside he could never possibly give me what I wanted. The sex was good and he was my first, but it was nothing but sex to him.

I was hurt in the beginning but the funny thing was that I ran to another man's arms. Why didn't I just call my best friend, Emily?

I had ran to Paul unknowingly. He basically told me to get over it. He didn't sugarcoat his words and that was what I needed. Paul was a great lover and he made my body sing, but the real question was if he could see more than a call girl? He was an awesome fuck yes, had me where I couldn't walk or move but could there be more? Paul liked control, and I really didn't mind him having it some of the time. But the question remained would he let me have some of it?

Paul reminded me a little of my father whenever it came to control. Also he was a lot older than me. I also felt safe in his arms but when he didn't get his way he dropped me like a hot potato. Who knows he could be in Dubai screwing some rich princess while I'm here with Mr. I Have No Dick. Maybe I did still have a soft spot for Paul. The what have, could have, should haves were coming out and it was time to turn them off. Hell it had been six months but who's counting.

I wanted a man to give me pleasure and let me have control when it was called for, tell me how much he loves me and always be there for me not only physically but emotionally.

Evan never tries to control me. He held me when I had my breakdown and never disrespected me. He wanted to be my friend and then a lover. I had actually experienced many firsts with him.

The way my body responded to his soft touches was out of this world. He let me do what I wanted to do even with his hands tied he gave pleasure. He never rushed but gave me mind blowing ecstasy. He made me learn my body and to not be afraid of it.

That night at the ball he rocked my world without even penetrating me. How many men do you know that can do that? Those hazel amber eyes were panty dropping. I could see why so many want him. He was more than a sex god but one of the sweetest guys I know. He was wealthy like the others but he didn't have to flaunt it.

Evan and I share an emotional connection but I wasn't sure if it was the right time for us. With so much going on with his daughter I would never want to be the cause of him never getting a happy ending.

Every little girl deserves to be loved by her first real love and that is daddy.
The love of a father shows how that daughter will in turn love another man.

It takes a real man to love a child that wasn't his. I tipped my hat off to Evan. He was even willing to fight for her and it made my heart warm. I wished my father would have shown just half of his love to me.

My dad and I weren't really close. My mom had put him out so many times, I didn't know they were actually married. I think maybe when they first met there was love. Who knows but I would like to think so. Unfortunately I didn't have the typical father daughter relationship.

I didn't know if Cupid shot his love arrow in my ass I would know what it was. I see Marci with Frank and I can see the love. I can even see the affection Ben has for Lilly but she is too stubborn to see it.

Love was a word that many threw around even if they didn't actually really mean it. The word should be a violation if not spoken with sincerity. The police should issue a ticket and lock you up for disrespecting the word.

The rules of being an escort shouldn't be difficult. It's just the emotional aspect of it that drains you. It doesn't matter how many times they say don't get attached, you give just a little of yourself. Even Chief Little Dick, got a pebble of me. But there can be times when one or two maybe even three will take a bite and leave you wondering with unsolved questions.

Usually people come into the business because there is something missing like money issues, family problems or even sexual inconstancies. You know my reason, but now I wondered if the other two didn't play a part.

I got up, turned off the tv and headed to my bedroom. I pulled out my briefcase and grabbed the pictures. I sat them side by side and took another drink. The resemblance was remarkable. I ran my fingers over both pictures almost hoping some magical spell would reveal the unknown but of course it didn't.

The reflection of myself in each picture sent a calming vibe. There was a kinship and maybe one day I would find out. There had to be a way to know. When Lilly decided to come back I would ask. Maybe like the old saying goes, "everyone has a twin."

I jumped in the shower and washed my hair. I guess I could call this night a driveby fuck. My meal should have been on the 99 cent menu. Hell, I should have paid him not to ever pull it out again. I see why the General had to use help, that thing was so small no woman would ever be satisfied. I couldn't help but laugh. Since I was home alone I just decided to sleep in my undies. Before long I had fallen to sleep with an empty bottle and an empty glass. Peace.