(Sadia's POV)
I was alone in the big room and was folding my sari, that I wore in the lunch party. The room was completely silent and dimly lit. As I noticed that, I started feeling a little restless. Why this room scares me so much? I asked myself. I quickly folded the sari and kept it on the table, intending to go out of this room as soon as possible.
Suddenly, the open window became shut, making a loud slapping sound, as a blow of air started whistling outside. The other windows also started hustling, along with the force of the wind. I gulped down and thought I should go and close the windows, after all it was just a storm outside. There was no point of getting so nervous.
As I walked to the window, for some reason I felt the same rush of impatience like I once felt when Maruf was waiting outside, leaning against his motorbike. My heart was again beating abnormally fast, as if I am going to look out of the window and spot Maruf there. My hands trembled, to open the half closed window and the moment I did, it totally moved me to see the same Maruf standing there.
I immediately stepped back, pushing my head backwards against the pillow. My eyes opened wide and I found myself on the bed. I rose up and looked on my side, to not find Abrar there. Without waiting for a second, I rushed to the study, where I knew Abrar would be.
~~~~~~~
"Abrar." I opened the door of the study taking his name. He looked at me instantly from his laptop, when I entered. I sighed a deep breath of relief seeing him there.
"What?.... Are you okay?" He said after looking at me for a while. I started walking towards him. "You were sleeping right?" He got up from his chair too, keeping a file on the table, which was most prolly on his lap.
"Can you come and sleep now?" I said clutching the sleeves of his hand. He steeped towards me too, extending his hand to cup my face but stopped right before he touched my face. He took his hand back. No. The back of my mind screamed, I wanted him to console me, touch me and make me feel that he was there. For the first time I felt as if I shouldn't have taken that promise from him.
"Okay." He said calmly, shutting the laptop with his other hand. I moved my hand from his and turn around but again look back to make sure that he was coming. He then dilated his eyes eying me to go.
~~~~~~
"You go in first." I said as we stood outside our bedroom. Abrar looked at me bewildered, opening the door. "Can you also close the windows?" I said as we entered the room.
"Windows? They are already closed. Did you see a bad dream?" He said going to the bed. I rushed to the bed too behind him.
The windows were open in the dream. Thank god it was a dream, it was a pretty scary one though. I would never want that to happen in real life.
The idea to think about Maruf seemed wrong now. I knew why I had this dream today, after so many days I heard Maruf's name, which was taken by Fairooza auntie and I thought way too much about the matter. She told Abrar something about him, I don't know what. I heard a bit when she said Maruf came to her house. Then they started whispering, leaving me to imagine what they might be talking or what Maruf might have done.
"Are you going to sleep? I am leaving in five minutes." Abrar said breaking me out of my thoughts.
"What? No. It's three in the morning, how long do you want to work more?"
"I really love the quote of Kammons Willson, 'I like to work half a day. I don't care if it is the first 12 hours or the second 12 hours."
"Who is Kammons Willson?"
"CEO of holiday inn."
"Never mind. What do you have to do with him? You have me right, so you should sleep as long as I sleep."
"Really? Are you a kid Sadia?"
"I am not a kid its your room that scares me Abrar, even in my dream, I am like why does this room scares me so much?"
"Oh what did you see in your dream then apart from the open windows and my scary room."
"Dream? It was a nightmare and you don't have to know Mr. Sherlock Holmes.
"Why?"
"Why do you want to know everything?"
"Because I don't want you to hide anything from me." When he said that, somewhere it did touch my heart for a moment. I realised even more that I was bounded to someone. I was Abrar's wife and I was married to him. It falls in my duty to be loyal in this relationship and to him and I expect the same from him too.
"Abrar should I believe you for what you said about Taniya in the car?"
"Sadia I wouldn't ever lie to you." I looked at him. He looks so good when lying on the bed, extremely hot. And now when he kept his hand between the pillow and head, his biceps became the centre of attention. Girls must have died on him in his college and university days. I still don't believe he belongs to me and someone like him is my husband. I didn't expect so much.
"You might have a lot of girlfriends in your college right?"
"That's why you brought me here? To chitchat in the middle of the night."
"Fine goodnight." Arrogant! He doesn't even let you talk to him. I closed my eyes turning my back to him.
"I was too busy in college with extracurricular activities. I didn't have girlfriends but I had a girlfriend."
"Oh really. Who was she?" I turned back immediately to him. The way he said that felt as if she was someone special. Doesn't she have to be? After all she was the one and only girlfriend of the hottest entrepreneur Abrar Ahmed.
"Why you want to hunt her down?" He said with his little rude and cocky tone.
"It's insulting talking to you Abrar. Good night." I turn my back this time with the strong intention of not opening my eyes anymore. It was a while of no one talking and of pure silence. I thought he slept.
"Sadia." But then he didn't, as he called out my name.
"Hmmm." I said almost drowsing back to sleep.
"Do you still love him?" As soon as the words reached my ear, I felt all my sleep just vanished in a second. Like a plane of paper flying through the window. Why did it even matter anymore now? I was Abrar's and that's what mattered. There was no point of talking about Maruf.
"What should I think of this silence?"
"Nothing. Does it even matter? Things won't change Abrar."
"And if I say that things can change." I felt the lump in my throat, as he said that. Without any second thoughts one thing that I was very sure about was, that this marriage was all that was important to me now. Maruf was my past and there was no space of him in my married life anymore.
"I would say I wouldn't need that change." I said being confident about my answer, in my calmest and lowest voice, being sure that he heard me.
"Go to sleep."
~~~~~~
I couldn't sleep even for a second after our conversation ended. My heart was beating so hard, with an unexplainable fear that I could hear it beating the entire time. That night I made up my mind that no matter what happens now, I would try to make this marriage successful. I would fulfil the promise, that I gave to dad, with all my want and dedication.
In the morning, I got to know that today was the voting day, for party election, so I didn't have any office. Abrar went to his office as usual, and I was left at home with nothing to do. Later, I thought I should go and meet dad. Today was a very important day for him and I wanted to stand beside him and gather all the wonderful experiences, that I can. Before going to dad I thought I should tell Abrar about it. It felt a little weird going to my dad's house without telling him. When I slide my phone open to call on Abrar's number, I realised I don't have his number.
I went down to mom, for taking Abrar's number. She was shocked at first as I told her I didn't know Abrar's number. There I also told her that I was going to my dad's house. She said okay and I thought there was no need to call Abrar anymore now. Though I thought what's in a call, that way I can also know if he was okay with everything, after last night. As I was definitely not. It felt as if I was going through a difficult and important phase of my life. I was still feeling heavy inside though I didn't exactly know why that was. A certain fear remained gripping my heart.
I named the new number that I typed, giant beast and gave him a call. Giant beast now felt sweet to me. It's meaning changed for me now, it no longer held the hatred that it did once. He picked the phone in a few rings, I could hear a lot of people talking on the phone. He was most probably in some meeting. I was thinking, if I did wrong calling him now, and should I cut the call. Then no, he spoke.
"Hello."
"Abrar." There was silence between us for a while before he spoke again.
"Yes."
"Nothing. I will talk to you later. You might be busy now." I said and cut the call immediately. People were talking about marking price and profit on the other side how I could I tell him stupidly that I am going to my dad's house. I would just make a joke out of myself.
Even a minute didn't pass, Abrar called me again. I really didn't want to pick the call up and there was no way I was going to. I decided to cut the call and I did. After cutting it, I thought what I did was wrong. I instantly texted him.
"Why are you calling me?"
He immediately texted back. "What's wrong with you? How can you cut my call?" Arrogant as usual. Wait let me show some arrogance to you too, I said to myself.
"Don't you have work? Stop texting me.😡" I attached an angry face emoji and pressed sent.
~~~~~~
As I reached dad's place, I felt I was in a different world. the whole house was crowded outside and inside. I took me a while to make my way to dad's study. As I opened the door, dad immediately looked right at me, from the television screen.
"Sadu.. you are here. I was going to call you to come here in a while." Dad then pressed the ring bell, and Kabir entered the room immediately.
"Get Sadu a chair beside me." Kabir then lifted a chair and placed that beside dad. Meanwhile I roamed my eyes around the room and saw a few group leaders sitting in the couch. Everyone was intently, looking at the television where the results were constantly being updated. In a while my eyes were there too. Dad and his opposition had approximately the same amount of votes, except that dad's votes were a little higher. The numbers on dad' s side then rapidly started to increase, while his opposition' s maintained the same slow pace. People became excited, I could hear people screaming outside in excitement.
"I don't think any one can stop us now." One of the group leaders turned towards dad and said. Outside drums already started to beat and people started cheering with dad's name. Dad then pressed the ring bell again and Kabir entered, who had a smile on his face. It was very rare seeing him smile.
"Yes sir."
"Tell them to not get excited so fast. The whole night is there to celebrate."
"Yes sir." He then left the room saying that.
"Why dad? Aren't we going to win now? Why did you tell them to stop celebrating?" I asked dad with curiosity.
"Another one hour Sadu. Then we will be completely sure. There is another division left where the opposition has a chance of getting a bunch of votes. If they are unsuccessful there, then we have the election in our hand."
All of these were so amusing. I wondered when I will be in dad's position. Seeing all these, I wanted to fight election as soon as possible, like dad. However I knew I had a long way to go. I am not yet experienced enough to lead a party. I had to make place in people's heart first and that's what I have been doing as the Vice President of Women Empowerment League.
I love my job, interacting with different people everyday, knowing their daily life, and the problems they are suffering. And after that making schemes and plans to get them out of their suffering.
I don't know how another one hour past looking at the television screen, and it then became completely evident who was going to win. Dad's opposition couldn't get enough votes from that division they expected from. Celebration then started on a grand scale. Dad then went outside and there people covered him with flower garlands around his neck. The entire place echoed with dad's name. It was then getting extremely crowded and I decided to go meet mom.
However I couldn't stay with her for long too, as mom had to attend a lot guests. I hugged her and then went upstairs to my room.
All memories swiped back in my mind. And unfortunately they were all painful ones. My room reminded me back of all the few days before my marriage. How I have cried in every corner of my room. I opened the window and stood in front of it. It was dark outside. The view outside was the same except for my life which was no more the same.
I stood there, breathing in the soft breeze outside, trying to not think about anything anymore.
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Hello everyone!! I know it has been to late that I haven't updated. I am really sorry for that. I had no other option but to stop writing for a few months, because of my studies. I had to give my board exams. But I am back now. You will get regular updates now inshallah every other day. So keep supporting like you all have always done and inshallah I will do my best.
The next chapter will have Abrar's POV. Hope you are all excited.
Do vote and comment.
Thank you.