We need to take Edward and Bella and feed them to Voldemort!
Voldemort: You bring news, Severus?
Snape: The instructions say to cook at 325 F for 5 1/2 until done
Bellatrix: My Lord, I would like to nominate myself for this task
Voldemort: I must be the one to carve the turkey
Official Nose Size Scale:
|----------|----------|----------|----------|----------|----------|-----------|----------|----------|
^Lord Voldemort ^ Average ^ Nigel Thornberry
Team Edward? No
Team Jacob? Nuh uh
Team Voldemort? HELL YEAH!
Leading Hand sanitizers claim to kill 99.9% Of germs
Lord Voldemort can kill 100% of whatever the fuck he wants!
Except Harry!
Thats 99%
Therefore: Voldemort is a hand sanitizer