Edited - 7/28/19
Luke
I never believed in love at first sight.
Although you could feel lust towards somebody first time you see them, or even be infatuated, you can't really feel love immediately. The thing about love is, it happens gradually. The emotions slowly build. One minute you're infatuated, then the next thing you know, you feel like you can't even breathe without them.
That was what it was like for me. Falling in love with Calum—it happened slowly.
At first we really only were best friends. Though I think, from the very beginning, I knew I looked at him in a special way. I was aware that best friends could handle being hours away from each other and not have it be a big deal, but I never wanted to be far from him. I knew best friends didn't get jealous when the other person talked about their crushes, but I did. I always knew he was something more to me, even though we just called each other our best friend.
Slowly, I began to notice. The way Calum's eyes had this shine to them whenever he laughed, or how he twiddled his fingers when he was nervous, or even the way he'd lock his jaw whenever he tried to stay quiet.
Then I noticed more of Calum, like how he was polite to everyone and how he helped anyone around him who needed it (I was jealous about it at first, until I realized how kind it was of him). I noticed how passionate he was about music and how excited he got when I told him that he played the bass and the guitar amazingly. I noticed how protective he was over his family, and I noticed how deeply he cared for animals and nature.
It was almost like falling in love with him was inevitable.
Even the little things, like the fact that he was insecure about his cheeks, or the fact that he genuinely listened to anything I said, wether it was relevant or not. He always responded someway too, so that I didn't feel like I was being ignored.
You could imagine my surprise the night before he went back to Australia to follow his dreams, the night when he kissed me.
For years I had to deal with him liking girls. I had convinced myself to accept the fact that he was straight and that we'd never have a chance, yet I never moved on. My heart had always been with him.
I told him that very same night that I was gay. He told me that he had no idea what his sexuality was, that all he knew was that he started liking me a few months before, and liking suddenly turned into something deeper.
I think the most painful thing about seeing him kiss Kayla was that I spent years accepting the fact that we could never be together. I had accepted the fact that even though I felt something towards him, those feelings would never be reciprocated. I accepted those things, but then he kissed me, and he told me he wanted me to be his boyfriend.
He gave me something to hold on to.
That night changed everything I had ever believed, and I was damn happy about it. Because it meant that he liked me back—maybe even loved me back.
He never said those words out loud. He never said I love you straight to my face.
"It's been five minutes and I don't think you've even blinked."
I glanced up, blinked, and turned around. Meredith was laying down on my bed, phone held above her head with her auburn hair all over my pillow. She glanced up, raising an eyebrow. "Nervous for today?"
Nervous wasn't even the right word to describe how I was feeling.
Since Calum and I posted those pictures of each other on Twitter, and two days ago he announced on the radio that he was dating somebody, more and more people had taken an interest to see if the rumors were true and to see if the two of us were an actual couple.
Dave hasn't told me when I would announce that I was dating Calum. Or whether or not Calum would be the one to tell. He hasn't told me much of anything besides that Calum's band and I were getting more publicity; although he didn't need to tell me that since I already knew.
Dave also told me that we should be spotted in public today. Maybe even stop to say hi if fans approached. We weren't allowed to confirm the two of us being together though. Not yet.
It's only been two days since Calum's radio announcement, but it had been the number one trending topic everywhere. Of course my mentions were filled with people asking if I was the person Calum was referring to, since he didn't say that he was dating a girl. I didn't reply to any of those.
"You think we could actually meet this boyfriend of yours officially?" Jake strolled into my bedroom, munching on some chips he found in my cupboard.
I met Jake and Meredith during my first ever acting job here in Australia. Meredith had been my stylist that day, and Jake happened to be there. Meredith and I had begun talking, and Jake was actually a bit wary of me talking to his girlfriend. I had told him I was gay, it really wasn't a secret anyway. After that, we all made small talk and they invited me to have dinner with them in a restaurant that night.
It had turned out that it wasn't only the three of us. Jake also invited his friend, Matthew, to dine with us. Matthew and I ended up sitting beside each other. He was actually a nice guy. He had mentioned how he loved football, and he lived in Australia all his life.
Meredith suddenly had to go to the bathroom and Jake got a call from his dad. That left me and Matthew at the table. It wasn't as awkward as you'd think, but I was completely oblivious to the fact that Matthew had been leaning in ever-so-slowly.
Once he actually kissed me while I was talking mid-sentence, I was frozen. I didn't know what to do.
I decided to kiss back, and just as I did that, I heard what sounded like a utensil hit a plate. I broke away, slightly embarrassed and expecting Jake or Meredith to be there.
Instead, I spotted Calum.
He was sat a few tables away, I didn't know who he was exactly but they were a bunch of older people. Probably members of his management.
Calum looked pissed. And he was looking directly at me. I think I looked mortified.
I remember that he had stood up, said something to the people with him, and walked right past our table without even glancing at me. I excused myself from Matthew, who looked confused at the whole thing, and followed Calum towards the bathroom.
I still remember every word we had both said.
"Stop following me, Luke."
"I'm sorry, I-"
"You're sorry?! You're sorry for what? Ignoring every call or goddamn text I sent you? I left voicemails saying how sorry I was even though I already told you that night at the party that Kayla was just some girl! I would've went to your place if I knew where you lived. I said I was sorry so many times and you just ignored me."
"I had no other choice! I have a job here, Calum, and whenever I think of you I want to break down all over again. I had to ignore you because I was losing my mind!"
"I was losing my mind, Luke! This past week has been an absolute nightmare, and tonight when I saw you enter those doors, I had to actually restrain myself from going up to you. Then you kissed that guy—"
"I understand that you're mad at me for ignoring you, but you can't seriously be mad at me because I kissed someone when we're not even together."
"What are you—"
"You did it first, Calum, just in case you forgot."
"You know what?! Fine! Don't want to talk to me? Well, good. I don't ever want to see your face again."
Calum then walked into the men's room and I had to clench my fists to stop myself from punching the wall because of how frustrated I was.
It turned out that we weren't as quiet as we hoped. Meredith had heard everything, and when she got out of the ladies' restroom, she asked if I just wanted to go home. She told Jake she'd drive me home in her car and Jake just said to take care after he saw my expression.
On the drive to my old apartment, I had broke down and told Meredith everything. I haven't seen Matthew since that night. Jake, Meredith and I have been best friends ever since.
"You going to drive out to meet Calum?" Meredith asked, suddenly running her hands through my hair. She currently worked at a high-end beauty salon, I think fixing people's hair was more of a habit for her.
I nodded and turned back towards my reflection. I was wearing a plain white shirt and a dark jean jacket. "I'm going to drive to a Starbucks in town. We'll meet there."
"Okay, well," Meredith sighed, smiling sympathetically. "Good luck, I guess."
"Call us if you need anything," Jake added.
---
It wasn't hard to spot Calum once I parked a few blocks away from Starbucks. He had a security guard with him, and he was taking pictures with three girls.
I slid on my sunglasses since the sun was shining brightly today, and I waited until the girls got their pictures taken with Calum. Once they finished, I slid out the driver's seat and locked my car, walking towards him.
He spotted me and smiled. He had his sunglasses hanging on the collar of his blue fitted shirt and he held out his arms once I was a few steps away.
I put on my most convincing smile and accepted the hug. His arms wrapped around my waist and mine around his shoulders. Sometimes I forgot that I was about two inches taller than him.
"What's with the greeting?" I asked through my gritted teeth, still wearing a smile.
"The girls' cameras are still out. Patricia said that paparazzi will be here soon." He replied in a whisper. I didn't feel his mouth moving, so he must've been doing what I was.
I looked a few feet away and surely enough the three girls who took pictures with Calum had their phones out pointing towards us. One girl had a hand to her mouth and the two others were squealing. Since I was wearing sunglasses, they seemed oblivious to the fact that I was looking at them.
Calum and I let go at the same time, and we were still smiling at one another. He slid on his sunglasses and I turned towards his bodyguard.
"Hi, I'm Luke," I said, extending my arm out. Maybe he already knew that, maybe he didn't, anyway I still wanted to introduce myself formally. He shook my hand, nodding. "My name's Chris."
I put a hand on Calum's back, leading him inside Starbucks. The smell of pastries and coffee hit my nostrils, and I smiled. I liked coffee, a lot. I couldn't function in the morning without caffeine.
We walked up to the cashier. For a Starbucks located in the city, it was surprising how there weren't much people here. The girl behind the counter looked way too surprised to see both of us.
She shook her head, breaking for the trance as I gave her a smile. "H—Hi! What can I get you two?" The girl, whose name tag said Charlie, gave a nervous smile back. I told her my order and Calum told his.
"Um, name please?" She asked, and I actually could see her hand shaking a bit as she held the sharpie towards the cup. I didn't know if it was because she was nervous of me, Calum, or both of us.
"Please write Skywalker."
I turned my head towards Calum who was smiling at the girl. I heard her laugh. "Alright," she mumbled.
"You think you're funny?" I raised an eyebrow at Calum, but my voice had a joking tone. He laughed, going as far as to wink at me.
"I know I am."
"Right." I scoffed and he lightly elbowed me on the side. It was all for show, obviously, and I guess it worked since the girl was biting her lip, trying to stop the giant grin on her face.
Not too long later, our drinks were done and as Calum went to get them, the girl called my name. "Luke? I'm—I'm such a huge fan of you! And I love 5 Seconds of Summer too! Both of you are so incredibly talented."
That actually made me happy to hear. "Thank you so much! Charlie's your name, right?" I asked, taking off my sunglasses as she nodded.
"Well, thank you for the service!" Calum said. Her cheeks actually turned a bit red at that.
Calum handed me my drink and I shook my head at the word Skywalker actually written on my cup, plus Calum's cup. We both sat down across one another and Calum removed his sunglasses before running a hand through his hair. "Have you eaten lunch yet?"
"I think I would've puke if I ate before coming here." I grinned despite my statement.
"Oh? And why is that?"
I looked to my left and then to my right then I gestured Calum closer, leaning in. He did the same, raising his eyebrow before I whispered. "It's none of your damn business."
He looked so annoyed once he sat upright and I couldn't help but laugh, even when this whole thing wasn't actually making sense.
I grabbed my drink, bringing it up to my mouth when, "Wait!"
"What?" I asked. I watched as Calum slid his phone out, turning on the camera. "I want to take a picture of our drinks."
I gave him a confused look. "The name!" He answered. "It's too funny not to post."
I didn't even argue, just shook my head before sliding my drink closer to his.
"What is this drink called anyway?" I asked once he as finished taking the picture. "Iced Caramel Macchiato. You can taste it if you want." Calum shrugged.
I hesitated.
"Go on, it's not a big deal."
I know it was not really a big deal, but drinking from Calum's cup seemed like a big deal to me. It was like I was stepping across the invisible barrier again. It was stupid to even think.
I sipped some of his drink, and it wasn't bad. I nodded, sliding the drink towards him. "That tastes great."
"Anything sweet tastes great to you."
He was right about that. I did have a bit of a sweet tooth. I loved any form of dessert from ice cream to tarts. Chocolate made me happy too.
"So," I decided to change the subject. "Where do you want to eat? Also, I kind of want to buy Chris a drink since it's hot outside."
"There's a pizza place just a few blocks away? We could walk."
"Do they have milkshakes?"
Calum narrowed his eyes. "You want milkshakes? Dude, that drink alone looks like it'll give you diabetes."
"First of all, don't say the word dude ever again. And second of all, you're just not a big fan of anything too sweet."
"That's not true." He said, crossing his arms.
"It is." I crossed my arms too.
"Is not."
"Oh yeah?" I leaned closer and mumbled. "Then prove it."
---
"What in fresh hell is this?"
I said thank you to our waitress before I chuckled at the look Calum's face. He was staring wide-eyed at the milkshake, barely noticing the pizza in front of him.
"It's glorious, isn't it?" I sighed, leaning back. We were in the pizza place he was talking about, and when our menu was given, I immediately searched for the sweetest milkshake they had.
It was called Triple Chocolate Milkshake. The milkshake was milk chocolate and there was chocolate syrup drizzled on the inside of the cup and on top of the whip cream. There were bits of chocolate chips stuck around the rim of the tall glass. "I'm getting sick just by looking at it." He frowned then turned to look at my drink. "Why do you get to drink iced tea?!"
"Because," I grinned, taking a slice of pizza. We both ordered our own personal sized pizza since I wanted one with pineapples and he didn't. "This is your way of proving."
I took a bite and happily chewed the greasy pizza. Calum just looked at the milkshake, shook his head, and sipped through the plastic straw.
"Oh wow," His face scrunched together. "That's like eating a handful of sugar."
"It can't be that bad!" I couldn't hep but laugh at his expression.
"Really?" He narrowed his eyes, placing the near me. "You try it then."
I shrugged before taking the glass and sipping through the straw.
"It tastes awesome." I said, meaning it.
"Yeah, okay," He scoffed, chewing on his pizza. We continued to eat, both of us pretending like we don't see the paps outside or some people in the restaurant taking pictures of us.
"Luke, you got um," Calum pointed to his mouth. I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand, but he just shook his head. "No, uh, a little," He pointed to the corner of his mouth and I tried to wipe my mouth again, but he just sighed.
I was really hoping he wouldn't do what I thought he'd do, but he did. Great. He got a tissue and reached over the table to wipe my mouth.
We both sat in silence for a moment after that.
"Thanks."He pressed his lips together before replying. "Don't mention it."
I drank from my iced tea and Calum opened his mouth again. "Listen, Luke, I think-"
"Luke? Is that you?"
Why was that voice familiar?
I turned my head towards whoever spoke and had to stop muself from choking on my pizza.
"Matthew?"