Song attached- Crazy in love ( FSOG )
" It's the way that you know what I thought I knew
It's the beat that my heart skips when I'm with you
But I still don't understand
Just how your love can do what no one else can • • • "
"Sometimes, a person who sees black shade of every thing, needs to be shown, everything in a white light. From always, I had been one of those persons, who fights to prove everything wrong. I have always seen the black side of every thing first.
However right now, when I was surrounded by nothing but white ambience of flowers, white fog and white tombstones, I felt like an idiot to find black inviting more than white.
White was demanding my soul to regret my decision.
I fell on my knees on the grass near the grave where my brother lies, letting a ear piercing scream escape from the bottom of my throat.
Why was I like this?
Why couldn't I let myself believe in love for once in a while?
Why couldn't I trust him?
I wanted answers to my silly questions. My life seemed like a fantasy to me.
How could two persons dream about each other at same time? It was beyond my understanding.
"Ever heard about Cupid stunt, little dear sis?" A voice snapped me back from my train of thoughts.
I looked up at the owner of voice, only for confirmation; because I couldn't believe he was here.
Crawling up on my knees, I moved closer to him and looked up at him with teary eyes.
"Bro?" I softly asked.
He nodded and lifted his hand to wipe those tears.
A familiar wave of comfort and security washed over my senses.
My brother was with me.
I stared at his black eyes, which were shining with a peaceful spark in them. There was a little smile pasted on his face. He was wearing a white shirt paired with white pants.
I noticed he was sitting on his own tombstone.
"What I'm doing here? Am I dead?" I asked puzzled by my presence with him.
He chuckled and flicked my forehead playfully.
"Still a dimwit, I see." He grinned shamelessly.
I frowned. When he was alive, he used to say I was a dimwitted tube light who can't catch anything by my brain easily.
"I am here to answer your questions Ellie." He sighed.
Gulping down an invisible lump of my throat; I asked, "How do you know?"
"I know because may be we are the cupid here." His lips curled up to side and he gestured me to turn back.
I turned back hesitantly and a shocked gasp left my lips as I stared at the girl sitting on the grave parallel to my brother's.
Starlight.
First thing I noticed about her was her eyes, they were of same color as Noah's. Her green eyes sparkled with warmth and care as her gaze met mine.
I was beyond confused now. How come my brother and his sister, acted like cupid?
"What's cupid?" I asked confusingly.
They both shared a laugh and bro pulled me up to sit next to him.
"Cupid is someone who initiates your relationship with your soulmate." He told me stressing on each syllable, as if explaining a thing to toddler.
Frowning over my situation, I narrowed my eyes at him and asked, "You mean you two played Cupid in my case?"
The girl sitting before me giggled and I noticed my brother staring at her with the same emotion in his eyes, which Noah has when he looks at me.
"We didn't play cupid. We simply prayed for our favorites to be together," She smiled at me.
"What is that supposed to mean?" I looked between them, with confused eyes.
"You see when we die..." She sighed trailing off on mention of death but continued once my brother gave her an assuring nod; "We become God's favorite. So we can pray them for our loved ones to be happy. Me and Ronald, we wished for you and Noah, to be happy again." She explained.
"I watched you, as you pulled a dull pessimistic cover on your eyes. It pained me to see my little sister like that. Never giving shot at happiness." Ron sighed, looking at me with painful expression.
"But how you can control my dreams?" I asked my one and only question that haunted me endless nights.
He chuckled and ruffled my hairs playfully.
"We didn't control anything. We just prayed. Consider it as a game of fate." He smiled cheekily.
"But then-
He interrupted me and intertwined his fingers with mine, "No if's, no but's. Because sometimes it's not about the story and how you met...it's about your happy ending." He tried to assure me.
"You never got your happy ending, bro. You too were in love, but it didn't pay off in last. You left me alone!" My voice cracked in the end, as I talked and remembered what caused death of the best person in my life. It was love, which was responsible for every disaster happened to me.
He merely shook his head and said, "who said I didn't get happy ending?" He grinned at me cheekily while looking at Starlight at the same time.
I noticed her smiling back at him as they shared a knowing look.
"Even you don't get happy ending, you will always thanks for the time given with him. My brother loves you from when he discovered he is a boy and his heart beat increased when he saw a girl in the park." Starlight joined in, making me blush by the mention of Noah.
"And if it's not happy in last..." My brother trailed off and kissed me on forehead; "It is not the end." He smiled at me.
He took Starlight's hand in his and they got up.
"As cliché as may it sound but yeah you only live once! Don't waste the things you get, only because of why's. May be somethings are just meant to be happened without any reason, just like your dreams. So be happy." He smiled and Starlight waved at me before they disappeared back into that thick white fog.
I wanted him to stop and never let go, but then I realized it can't be true; because you only live once."
********
I wiped my tears away with back of my hands, and sat up rubbing my eyes.
Bringing my knees closer to my chest, I hugged myself tightly.
It is not the end if it's not happy.
I'm not happy. It is not the end. Few tears slipped from my eyes, as I stared away in dark with aching heart.
From always, I kept my insecurities as my first priority. I hated idea of love and relationship, and when I fell for one I got scared and took a step back.
This is right. Not everything is supposed to make sense. Not even my dreaming. People say you dream about those things, which lingers in your subconsciousness. May be my subconsciousness was in search of love, which came in form of him.
I don't have any explanation, why he dreamt about me at the same time. May be as my brother said, it was the game of fate. May be when two souls are destined, nothing and no one can keep them away.
I don't know why I walked out on him like that. I just couldn't wrap my head around everything, because it was too good to be true.
But in the end, it always gets better, doesn't it?
My mom is going to get remarried, she moved on from Mr. Sperm Donor after a long time. Yeah, it took time but it happened in the end.
My brother may be died because of rejection by a girl, then again, he is in a better place now.
Noah knocked on my dreams when I was lost myself. He guided me to light back. He made me happy in dreams and his thoughts made me feel alive in real.
He was my comfort in my darkest days, even not being there; still he was with me.
His broken voice lingered in my thoughts, the way he had tried to stop me. I quickly wiped my tears and jumped out of bed.
There was no time for moping around when my boy must be sad!
It was close to midnight. But nothing can stop me from finally going to him.
I was wearing a loose tee-shirt and black shorts.
Nah duh, not appropriate uniform to make a boyfriend!
I agreed with my inner voice for once and rushed to my closet. Picking out a lavender colored dress, I pulled my hair up in a messy bun.
I stared at my reflection in the mirror. I was looking no less than a live wreck. I washed my face and tried to dab my eyes to make them look less swollen. Slipping on to the dress, I put on some sandles and tip toed outside the room.
No matter how much cool my mom was, she won't allow me to go for a hunt in midnight.
Even Cinderella went after her prince charming at midnight!
Yeah, but mom won't understand that. So I made my way downstairs as quietly I could and picked up the car keys from the coffee table.
I don't drive really, I lost my confidence when Ronald died. But now, when I'm ready to face my demons; let's start with this one.
Cool breeze greeted me as I stepped out of house and shut the front door quietly. I rushed to the car and zoomed out of driveway at full speed. I kept my concentration on the road and drove with my emotions in control.
I made my way to his house and parked the car outside.
Now what?
I stepped out of car and looked at his house, nervously biting my nails.
Yeah, now what? I came here now what I'm supposed to do?
Climb his window.
I snorted at my inner instinct... But then what are options left?
I can't ring the doorbell or his dad will wake up. I can't shout him to come outside. I forgot my mobile in haste at home.
Good going Ellie. You should write a book, "how to propose someone."
I took in a deep breath and picked up a stone that was lying beneath my feet.
Closing my one eye, I aimed the stone at his window and threw it. It hit his window. I waited for any kind of reaction. May be switching on lights of his room or coming out in balcony.
Uh...isn't this part where he will come and I will bend on one knee and tell him how much I love him too...
But my life never had been as expected.
I sighed when after five minutes, nothing happened. I looked around and noticed that his bike was missing. So means, he must be missing too.
I rushed back to my car and groaned resting my head on steering wheel.
Where he might be at this hour?
Where you met him first.
I contemplated my thoughts, where I met him first... It is possible that he was there.
He better not be sitting at your side of swing!
I giggled at my silliest childish worry and drove off to 'our' destination.
Here I come Mr. Romeo...
With a smile plastered on my face and a racing heart, I made my way towards my childhood handloom...
He was my sky, and it was about time I find my place in his constellation.
***************
Hello everyone,
I'm so sorry for late update! Had been super busy last week.
So I hope now it's clear why they dreamt.
It was indeed Cupid's stunt. I know people in real life who had dreams like these and end up with someone who resembles that someone of their dream.
Sometimes, things not need to be explained. They just happens, don't they?
Tell me your thoughts about this chapter!
Liked the dream sequence after a long time?
What do you think of Ronald and Starlight? Do you think they are in better place now?
Do you agree with Eleanor making first move by stepping out in midnight? 😛
How do you think she's gonna tell him? Or no words will be needed? 😳
• • • Thanks for reading • • •