Beth
"Have a seat," David says from behind his desk. I sink into a cushy leather chair directly across from him and observe my friend. He hasn't changed much since our college days. If his trim figure is any indication, he has continued his ritual daily run over the years. He has laugh lines and a few gray hairs in his dark, wavy mane, but they only make him look more distinguished. He's not quite as handsome as Isaac, of course, but I suppose I am partial. As expected, he's wearing a uniform of t-shirt and faded jeans. He likes to buck tradition that way.
"I don't know why you wouldn't just let me email the application," I complain as I scoot the paperwork to his side of his oak desk. He has a matching set of bookshelves lining the walls filled with business books.
David grins.
"All part of my devious plot to get you to visit me. Seems like you're always too busy now." I shrug. We are both busy, and neither of us has maintained our friendship as well as we should.
"Um, Beth?"
"Yes?"
"You have a little something on your cheek. You might want to wipe it off." He hands me a tissue.
I pull out the mirror I use to powder my nose and realize the little something is a large dirt streak up my cheek. Nice, Beth. Real classy.
I had known at some point Isaac and I would probably cross paths. It was inevitable, with his grandmother living in the same town and all. I just never imagined I would be in my ripped up jeans and looking like I'd been playing in the dirt, which is actually a fairly apt description of the joy I feel when I'm working with my plants. I quickly wipe off the streak.
"Just so you know David, I'm turning in the application, but I'm not sure if I will have time for the competition. We are in the middle of moving."
"Hire someone to do it," David says. Right. How would that be to be a billionaire and with a mere snap of the fingers, order the world around you? Never mind that we've blown through our money reserves. To be more accurate, my father and sister have. I'm about as low maintenance as they come.
"Maybe," I say noncommittally, changing the subject. "How are Carrie and the kids?"
He makes a face.
"Don't ask."
"Oh no, what are you in the doghouse for this time?" I laugh.
"Carrie's mad at me again. You wouldn't believe the guilt trip she's putting me through, just because I had a last minute meeting and missed Sydney's dance recital. I dragged my sorry butt to the last one, and do you know, the little stinker laid down on the floor and refused to dance! I told Carrie it's bad enough that I shell out $150 bucks each month for lessons, another $300 for costumes and another $50 per person just to watch.
"It's these meetings that fund those expensive tantrums. You understand, don't you Beth? You know the importance of what we're trying to accomplish here. You wouldn't expect me to miss an important meeting with a man who flew over 5000 miles and has a three hour window to meet just to watch my daughter throw a tantrum."
"Oh no, don't drag me into this," I protest. "Carrie is the best thing that ever happened to you. Parenting is tough. I think she's just hoping for someone who will help carry the weight and enjoys being with the kids as much as she does. Besides, other than my own nephew and niece, you have the most adorable children I know. I would have gladly paid that money to see Syd throw her tantrum, and I would have loved every minute!"
"I know you too well. You would get a kick out of watching me crawl under my chair and die of embarrassment."
"That would be the best part," I say.
"It is so good to see you again," David grins, reaching out and giving my hand a gentle squeeze. "It still feels wrong that you and Isaac aren't here living the dream with me and Heidi. Sometimes I wonder if you ever wish you could go back and choose differently?"
"It's funny you should say that. I was just thinking the same thing when I saw that Inc. cover again. The hard thing is I still can't see what I could have done differently. My family needed me at the time. I'm still needed. Until I can figure out a solution there, I'm stuck."
"It wasn't a problem, telling Isaac you're renting out your house, was it? You haven't found a renter yet, have you?"
I shake my head.
"We are moving to our summer house in Nantucket for the summer. Well, I guess if I do this competition, the rest of my family will be going there and I'll stay here."
"And how are you feeling about moving?"
Trust David to zero in on the raw nerve. It's my turn to make a face.
"That bad?" he says sympathetically. "Must be tough leaving your childhood home like that."
I feel a lump form in my throat at David's kindness and nod. Few people understand how attached I am to my home and my gardens, and he's one of them. It's the only house I've lived in, and to be honest, the only place I ever want to live. David sees my agitation and changes the subject.
"So, how are you feeling about the Next Big Thing?"
"I'm mostly a bundle of nerves. I mean, you, Heidi, Isaac—" I half choke on the last name and hope David doesn't notice, "you've all proven yourselves. I don't feel like I've accomplished anything. I have tried to start a few businesses over the years, but they never took off. If I was going to succeed, it would have been with you guys. I'm not the type that feels comfortable getting up in front of rooms and trying to convince people to give me money. I'm hoping I have it in me to succeed with this."
"Most people fail a few times before they hit on the right thing," he says. "Isaac is giving me a hard time, but he's wrong. Crazy is trying to invent rocket roller blades, which I'll have you know, seemed much cooler in concept stage. I still have a scar on my arm where I fell after my roller blades tried to spontaneously combust."
I am laughing so hard, my side hurts.
"This idea, on the other hand, is brilliant. It will give the company wonderful exposure. He'll see the light soon enough. See, it's giving you an opportunity for people to learn about your product. You'll find your way. Besides, it's too harsh to say you haven't accomplished anything. You've done so much to help your family."
"Maybe. But it's time to see what I'm capable of, and I'm hoping this is the opportunity where I finally make it. I just don't feel like I can go through one more learning experience. You understand, right? I'm done with always spinning my wheels and never getting anywhere."
"Yeah. I get it. Well, do what you need to do. We'd love to have you in the competition, but it's your decision. Speaking of decisions, though, there is one thing that's been weighing on my mind I wanted to talk to you about."
He drums his fingers on his desk and hesitates, as if weighing whether he should bring it up or not.
Now I am curious. David isn't usually at a loss for words.
"What is it?"
He seems to be struggling to place the words correctly.
"You know you can tell me anything," I say.
"If you could go back in time, would you have said yes?" he asks softly, his blue eyes probing mine.
I catch my breath sharply. Flustered, I disentangle my hand and settle it my lap. I hadn't expected him to bring up our history. Shortly after the gang sold Solere and Isaac had left for Africa, David and I had dated briefly. For me, it was a fun diversion with a dear friend. For him, it was so much more. I didn't even realize how serious he was until he was down on one knee with a giant rock in his hand, and I had to gently break it to him that I couldn't marry him. For a brief moment, I imagine how much easier my life might have been if I had accepted him, but it wouldn't have been fair to David when I had such strong feelings for another. My heart still belonged with the man I had walked away from, but it's not like David had any way of knowing Isaac and I had even been together since we had kept our romance private.
"David, we can't go there. The decision is made, and we need to live with it. Carrie and your kids, that's the life you chose."
"Only because a certain someone said no. It has occurred to you, hasn't it, that your family wouldn't have had to give up your home if you'd said yes."
I flush at the warm look in his eyes and look down at my hands. They tremble, and I clench them tightly in my lap.
"Beth, it seems no matter what I do, I can't please Carrie. I know being married to someone with a career like mine isn't always easy, but she has every comfort in life, a beautiful house, a new car. The kids go to the best schools in the area. Every day she just gets colder. Sometimes it would just be nice to feel a little warmth, a little kindness. What would it be like to receive a nice smile and hug when I come home, a little welcome, I'm glad to see you? The truth is, I didn't just forget about the recital, I skipped it on purpose because I knew there would be a big blowup either way, so I may as well do what I want to do. She's critical of every little thing about me. But you were never that way, Beth. It was always easy with you. You understood me. You cared about this business succeeding just as much as me. Carrie has never showed a bit of interest in it. I can't help but wonder how different my life would be if you would have agreed to be my wife."
I am shaking my head at this point, but I can tell David still has his doubts. Carrie is so similar to me, it's eerie. Even our physical resemblance is uncanny—we are both around the same height and have brunette hair that falls past our shoulders.
"No, David. Listen to me. You may not see it, but it probably wouldn't have worked for us for the same reason that you and Carrie are struggling now. You have a strong personality, and you need someone who can tell you no. Carrie has let you call all the shots for too long, and now that's she's finally asserting herself, you don't like it. I can't help but sympathize with her."
"I thought you were on my side," David grumbles.
"There are no sides here. You are one of my best friends, but you would have overwhelmed me too. I understand how important this business is to you. It was important to me too. You've worked so hard to build it to this point, and I couldn't be more proud of you, but I know it's been hard on your family too. You and Carrie should sit down with a good marriage counselor and work this out. You owe it to your family. If you put it off too long, you might lose her."
David runs a hand through his hair and grimaces.
"That's not going to happen. Carrie doesn't believe counseling would help us. Who knows? Maybe she's right. Either way, I don't have the time to think too hard about it. At least the good thing about Carrie is she doesn't hold grudges and she always forgives me. Maybe I'm just overly stressing this. Things will work out, I'm sure. They always do."
"I hope so," I say, standing. I'm skeptical, but anxious to leave before David takes my hand in his again. It's especially unnerving after having just been in Isaac's presence and having those intense emotions from the past dredged up. I am still reeling from seeing him again. I am sorry David and his wife are struggling in their marriage, but the best kind of friend I can be right now for both of them is one who supports from a distance.
Then David casually says something that stops me in my tracks.
"By the way, Carrie and I are throwing a welcome home party for Isaac tomorrow night at our house. Dinner, dancing, all that jazz. You should bring the family; it will be fun. It would mean a lot to me if you would make sure Isaac stands up for a dance or two. The poor guy is still going through culture shock after spending so much time in Africa. Can you make sure he has a good time?"
David, David, David, if only you knew what you are asking of me.
"Sure, if I can make it, that is. There's still a lot of packing to do," I hear myself say, but I'm cringing inside. I don't know whether to laugh or cry at the cruel joke karma has played on me.
I remember too well the last dance I had with Isaac, and the way that night had ended in disaster. It's enough to make me want to run home and console myself in my garden, but it's all a painful reminder that soon I won't have a home or garden to run to anymore. I wish it weren't so necessary for me to enter this competition, but it is. Desperate times, desperate measures and all that.
The competition hasn't even begun, and I'm already in way over my head and sinking fast. I am shaken by the realization that if I do compete, I will be rubbing shoulders with two men who felt I had rejected them. Not only that, one is unhappily married, and the other is likely still angry with me.
Uncomfortable doesn't begin to cover it.
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Hola! Thanks for reading. Leave a vote on your way out please :)
I post a new chapter every Tuesday and Friday.
Sooo, there's another wrinkle, eh? Why do we authors make our poor characters life's so miserable - lol!
I need your help with something. So I'm getting mixed feedback of the use of images in the chapters. I am gathering feedback to make a decision on whether to continue using them in the text or not. To be honest, the biggest concern I have is one reader indicated she couldn't even read the chapter. Please share your honest opinion about what you think about the images. What device or computer are you using? Do the images show up or cause complications in your reading? Do you like them or not? Do you like them in the text or just in the media section? I would love to hear back from as many of you as possible!
Also, I am trying to figure out a possible choice for David. Thanks to @cristallee_02 and @sarahlprins for your suggestions. So far we have James Marsen, Ryan Gosling, Bradley Cooper, Ryan Reynolds and Shemar Moore. Planning to take a vote over on Facebook, so let me know your preference between these (or if you like someone else) below, or join us on Facebook at http://facebook.com/sarahbensonbooks!
Dedication goes out to my dear friend and fellow Wattpadre in crime amberkbryant! Thanks for all your support on this story chica! If you don't know Amber yet, join us on our Twitter chats every Tuesday night at 8:00 EST and get to know her. She's awesome, and one of those versatile writers who rocks every genre she writes in. I first found her through her Watty-award winning book "Unseen." She has been featured in the Romance anthology and her latest book "Blood King" is shaping up to be a cracking read. She hooked me on the first chapter and I can't wait to read more!