"When you truly care about someone, you will make them smile, no matter how much in pain you are. It takes me to two conclusion. First, that he cares for me. Because his eyes holds a painful history, yet he does everything in his power to make me happy."
Second, I care for him too. Because when I see his painful eyes, I want to kill every reason that hurts him. I want to fill his world with happiness, because his happiness means the world to me"
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"My heart broke as I watched the sight in front me. All of a sudden, I started to feel sick. Tears prickled at corners of my eyes and an urge to protect him from everything took over my body.
I started taking little steps towards the boy who had been changing my life since a few weeks, in a good way. He was sitting on the ground; his arms wrapped around his knees, and head held in hands.
A lone tear escaped my eyes as I saw him there, all heartbroken. I had never seen him like this. He was always all smiles and sunshine. And no matter how much weird and crazy things his smile did to me, I would give up anything to see his smile once again. Because it killed me to see him like this.
With every step I took toward him, I felt my heart getting heavy. It was like someone was stepping over it again and again. It was crushing my insides.
I sat down beside him on my knees. He didn't move a slightest bit, oblivious to my presence. It was may be the first time, when I was this close to him but he didn't even look at me. From few places where we had been together, I was his sole attention; and I would be lying if I said I didn't miss it.
His silence was torturing me. He was there, sitting close to me, but yet I felt he was too far from my reach. I didn't prefer seeing him like this. I liked when he smiled at me. I liked when his green eyes looked at me with affection. I liked when his deep voice told me sweet nothings. I liked when he teased me, calling me Juliet. I liked when he was happy, and I would do anything to make him happy again.
"Hey!" I whispered softly putting my one hand on his shoulder.
He continued brooding in his own silence. The silence that was killing me. No matter how much I curse him for making me feel the things I am not supposed to feel; he had been always there for me when I felt lost. He pulled me back from darkness.
It was my turn now. I won't let him suffer like this.
I felt his shoulder shaking under my hand. I looked at him closely now, tears were streaming down his cheeks. I didn't waste any more time in making another move. I turned my body towards him and took his hands in mine.
He finally looked up. His eyes were cold, unusual from their warm tone. He looked so broken, so empty. I wanted to take him in my arms and make him forget everything. So I did.
I closed every distance between us and snaked my arms around his neck tightly. His body numbed over because of my sudden actions. I tightened my hands around him and bought him more closer to me. I wanted him to feel that I am here for him. I wanted to tell him that I am ready to take share of his every pain. I wanted him to know that I want to heal his every wound.
I have never felt this way about anyone in my entire existence. This urge to protect someone, possessiveness was new feeling for me. And it had to be him; it can be only him to make me feel this way.
His arms wrapped around my waist, and he buried his face in my hairs, sighing deeply. I felt him relax under my touch. I kept my hold on him, not wanting to let him go. My heart broke some more when I felt his wet tears on my neck.
I ran my fingers through his hairs softly and whispered into his ears, "I don't know what happened with you, but I promise whatever it is; it is going to be okay."
His arms tightened around my waist, hearing upon my words. Our bodies wrapped around each other, ignited the deepest corners of my heart. His touch felt like breathing of fresh air on a spring morning to me.
He was like a drug, and I was getting addicted to him.
He whimpered some more in my arms. My heart clenched at his state.
"I am so sorry..." I said in an attempt to make him feel better.
He slowly pulled away from me, but his arms were holding me still. He looked in my eyes deeply. It was not his normal warm stare that I started to love, it was as if he was trying to solve a puzzle in the depths of my eyes.
"Why you said sorry?" He asked me quietly. He sounded like a small child who asks his mother the reason for disappearing of stars in morning. The confusion in his eyes was adorable and cute.
I smiled lightly and held his face between my palms.
"Because I was not there to save you from this damage." I whispered tracing my finger underneath his eyes. His eyes closed on instinct, as if savoring my touch to his memory.
Maybe I should not have came this far. I shouldn't have crossed my lines. I stopped my tracing and started to pull my hands away from his face, but his hands stopped me catching my wrists.
He opened his eyes. I was scared to look at their coldness again. Because that was breaking my heart. But his eyes were no longer cold. They were taking a warm shade slowly.
I could not help myself from smiling after seeing that. To complete his look, I tugged his lips upwards using my free hand. Seeing my gestures, a boyish smile took over his features. The smile that sends my heart on overdrive.
I tried again to withdraw myself from his touch. I had no problem with our closeness. It gave me warmth of assurance, care and everything I knew I never felt before. But I was afraid that maybe he would not like it.
He sighed intertwining my fingers with his. He shifted himself and bent down, placing his head on my lap. My breath hitched at our proximity. But he continued playing with my fingers. My other hand involuntarily caressed his hairs lightly.
"You are wrong." He said after sometime.
"Huh?" I asked in a daze, still in euphoria of his touch.
"You were always there to save me from damage. Not by my side, but always with me."
I frowned in confusion but refrained myself from asking any further questions to him, as he seemed to be very content in playing with the little dangling hearts of my bracelet. He looked really cute doing that. His eyes were concentrated on the task of my hand too, giving him a really innocent look.
I wondered where we were. The entire place was covered in a white thick sheet of fog. Only the lush green grass on which we were lying on was visible. But this place gave a familiar feeling to me. I could not pin point exactly what it was.
"My sister died three years ago." He said, pulling me out of my thoughts.
"Oh!" I whispered. I didn't know what to say. Apologizing for that makes everything more worse. People usually don't need your pity. Neither I asked him how or why. Because people at their worst try to seek comfort in those one who don't take pity on you or ask you questions, they find the comfort in those who are always there for you without even telling you.
"And you were there for me to pull me back from my dark phase. You are here now too." He told me, his eyes dropping close.
I had no idea what he was talking about. I just kept caressing his hairs and smoothing the lines of his forehead.
He sighed and asked me in a sleepy voice, "do you promise angel you will be there for me, like forever always?"
I giggled at him. He was trying so hard to fight off his sleep.
"I promise." I assured him.
He smiled softly and held out his pinkie finger to me, "pinkie promise?"
I smiled at him and joined my pinkie with his, sealing the deal, "pinkie promise."
I don't know why but making pinkie swear with him felt like a déjà vu.
His smile remained in place and eyes started to drop to sleep. He kept my hand in his and placed them together on his chest, finally surrendering to sleep."
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Cold wind greeted me as I opened my eyes. My head was lying on a cold stone. I quickly jerked my head up and looked around. I was at a graveyard. How so I am here?? I frowned in confusion and closed my eyes to collect my thoughts.
Today was Sunday. 21st June. It was the third death anniversary of my brother. Ironically it was his birthday too, because he died on his 18th birthday.
Yesterday after coming from shopping spree with my best friends, I had kept myself busy in studies because I didn't want to think about the certain someone. At night I had slept late because I was on a Harry Potter marathon with my mom. We follow it as a tradition of my brother's birthday. He used to love HP movies. He would drag us to living room and kept us up until 3:00 a.m.
Today I left the house at 12:00 noon and came here to talk to my favourite guy in the world. I told him everything. The turn of events for me from last few weeks to making new step brother, everything. I guess in middle of telling him, I fell asleep on his grave.
I sighed as I arranged the flowers on his grave, "I have to go now big bro. I will come soon to see you again with Jacob may be. He will like to meet my another brother, right?"
I stood up and smiled reading carving on his grave " The best son and the bestest brother in whole universe : Ronald West "
"Happy birthday Ron..." I whispered wiping the tears from my eyes.
I turned to leave but something caught my eye. It was the grave lying beside my brother's. It was offering such a contrast to my brother's grave. It was covered in dried leaves, while my brother's was in flowers today.
I knelt down and wiped away all the dirt and leaves from that grave too. I picked up some flowers from my brother's grave and put it down on the one beside him. I wiped away the dust from the written carvings too. My eyes widened realising that it's same date as today.
"The best daughter and bestest sister in the universe : Starlight Taylor"
I smiled seeing the line. It was same as my brother's. It must be a beautiful coincidence. I calculated her age from given birth year and death year. She died at age of sixteen. My heart felt sad for her.
'My sister died three years ago' his voice came to mind.
Was it possible that..this may be his sister's grave?? No way this can't be.
Gosh!! There must be millions who must have died on today's date.
I shook my head for clearing those stupid thoughts from my mind but his green eyes filled with sadness haunted me.
I sighed and ran my fingers through her grave.
"I don't know who you are, but I know you must be a very beautiful person. Everyone is. Can you help me, though?? I have heard when stars die, they fulfill someone's wish. I have a wish to make, can you make it true??" I whispered absent mindedly.
"I don't know who he is, or where he is or even he exists at all or not. But yeah if he does, please make sure he smiles and be happy always. Because here is someone who is dying to see his smile." I said, a smile coming on my lips remembering him.
Damn it! Again no memory of his face.
A wave of disappointment washed over me on not having any memory of his face.
I got up to leave, looking at the two graves having same day of death. I smiled and closed my eyes wishing for their peace.
Ronald and Starlight, there was something beautiful energy between their graves. That kind of beautiful energy that you feel in a room when there are two people hopelessly in love.
I left the graveyard with too many questions, one new acquaintance and one memory of a dream to behold.
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