***
It's okay to be a glowstick;
Sometimes,
we need to break before we shine.
***
Nellie and I set about to prepare the pack dinner after coming home.
I ended up burning my palm in the process. But three years of training told me that it was best not to cry. I told Nellie I needed a minute and went to bandage my left palm.
The dinner was just as usual. The pack members thanked Nellie and me for the dinner by throwing a lot of insults our way.
"Hey fatty!!" one of Aden's lapdogs yelled. Yeah, that one was for me. "You don't want to eat the leftovers do you? A bit of a diet won't kill your bulky stomach."
I bit back the urge to roll my eyes.
Fatso? Me?
They better get a good look at themselves. Evan Luke, Aden's supposed best friend was as lean and lanky as a blue whale. Oh but then that was just 'puppy fat'.
The pack soon finished dinner and left but not before ruining my face with the cake I had spent two hours baking for dessert. Apparently, they wanted to see me with a bit of makeup.
Scoundrels.
I said nothing while I cleaned up the mess they made and went to wash the cream off my face. Nellie, I and a few other omegas supped on the leftovers and washed the plates.
Once everyone went to sleep I sneaked out for a run.
I looked back at the dark pack house and barely contained a smile. All day long, slogging and serving these ungrateful people, now was the time I could actually do what I wanted.
Zara seemed delighted as she took control. Bones cracked and fur grew out of my skin as I morphed into my lupine form. My furry tail swished with excitement.It had been a week since I went out for a run. Of late I always felt someone watching me sneak out. My nerves prickled and hackles on my back rose. But for some reason, Zara was always at ease.
Relax, she'd tell me. If he was a rogue, I'd know. Instincts never lie.
I ran ten miles in my wolf form along the perimeter and then a few in my human form. As the moon climbed higher, my pace slowed and I took a detour to the gym. Unlocking the door, I made my way towards the long row of punching bags. Wearing a pair of black gloves, I drew in a deep breath. Put distance between my feet and angled my body forward.
I pictured Alpha Jason's face in my mind.
BAAM!
My fist shot out like lightning.
A zing shot down my spine as the chains rattled. Adrenaline pumped through my veins.
I pictured Evan Luke.
BAAM! The next one.
Then another as Nicole Sanders appeared next.
I ignored the sweat trickling down my forehead. The salt made my eyes itch and water, but I was undeterred. I needed this—the thrill of the punch, the power flooding through me. I might not be allowed to train anymore—but no one could take this away from me.
The fire in me hadn't extinguished. Not yet.
So I hit, one after the other, until my bones protested and my heart was pounding in my ears.
I took a break.
Then, hit some more.
An hour later, I snuck back to the pack house, soundless as ever. Knuckles bruised and muscles aching, I was exhausted by the time I returned. My clothes were soaked in sweat as I tiptoed to my room. Halfway there, I looked at the clock as it chimed.
One AM. Long past midnight.
Somewhere in the distance, I heard the creak of a door and a sharp intake of breath. I froze in my tracks. My gaze snapped up, in the direction of the sound but whoever it was had already disappeared.
Blood thrummed through my veins. A chilling sense of dread settled inside me.
But a minute passed, and no one appeared.
No footsteps. No voices.
Silence.
I exhaled.
It couldn't have been the Alpha, I reasoned. If it were him, he'd already yelling my ear off by now. Whoever it was, didn't want to confront me about it.
For that, I was glad.
* * *
Next morning started as usual with me waking up early to make the pack breakfast. My arms were sore after last night and my knuckles were a little pink. Rubbing some of the leftover ointment on them, I padded up to the kitchen before anyone else.
"Hi, you're up early." Nellie commented as she drowsily made her way to clean the table.
"More like you overslept." I replied, rolling my eyes,
She yawned. "But it's only half past five now. Goddess, how can I be so tired? I just woke up."
I chuckled and continued dicing the vegetables. "You can catch upon your sleep in Chemistry today. You never pay much attention in that class anyway."
"Great idea. Sometimes I think, if silver can't kill us werewolves, Mrs. Reynolds lecture on polymers surely will."
We were laughing as the pack entered.
"Hey slut! Where is our breakfast?" That was Evan's way of greeting me good morning.
"Coming," I told him showing him humility he never deserved. His sick smile grew as he watched me work. My back was to him and his bowl was in my hands as I filled it up for him. Midway, I paused and turned back. He was talking to someone else.
Good. This was my chance.
I spat in his oatmeal.
I felt someone stare at me intently from the side and glanced in the direction.
That turned out to be Aden staring at me with an expression I couldn't fathom. His gaze was intense and unnerving that had me rooted to my spot.
However, as soon as he saw me look at him he turned away. He seated himself beside Evans.
Shit. He didn't see me spitting, did he? If he did, I was so screwed.
But if he had, he never mentioned it. His fist tightened underneath the table as I approached them. I shot him a sideways glance as I placed Evans plate on the table, but he never looked back. Not once.
Weirded out by his strange nature yet relieved at the same time, I returned to the counter and continued serving the pack breakfast.
As soon as I was done, I decided to leave. Quietly, unnoticed by people. All this time, my wolf was excited for no apparent reason.
I glanced at Mom and saw her looking at me. Her lips formed a small smile when she saw me looking and then continued with her breakfast. I watched her for a few moments and then left the room as quietly as possible.
The first class was English again and I entered the classroom with a sigh. A blessed way to begin the day with the slut and the brute the very same class.
"The handsome brute." my wolf muttered clearly upset about something.
What was wrong with everyone today? Zara was actually calling Aden the biggest brute, handsome!
Hormones are funny things.
The whole time during the class, Aden continued to give me those scary looks.
Had I been the old Kiara, I would have probably shown him the finger. However, as the new Kiara who always tended to be on mute mode, I kept quiet and forced myself to pay extra attention in class.
The bell rang and once again I grabbed my books and made a run for the door. I managed to reach the locker without any major accident and thanked my stars.
"Kiara," a deep and husky voice fell on my ears.
Oops .... spoke to soon. I knew exactly who that was.
"Yes Alpha?" I said looking at the floor. Well, would-be-Alpha, actually. But I wasn't going to be cheeky and risk a slap.
"Look up." he commanded in the husky voice of his that would generally send the girls swooning.
I would swoon too, but for entirely different reasons.
Oh well, looks like little old me is in trouble once again.
I hesitantly looked up into his intense black eyes.
Over the past three years Aden had grown up into a ferocious and fearful person. No one would recognize him as the shy Aden three years ago, he was Would-Be-Alpha Aden Carter now..
He looked at me for a long moment saying nothing. Jeez what was up with this guy today?
"You are my mate." He spat out finally, as though the words were poisoning his mouth.
"Oh." I mutter, trying to process the information he just gave me. My brain seems incredibly slow for some reason and it's only until ten seconds later that realization kicks in hard.
WHAT?
HOLY MUFFINS WHAT!?!?
Oh right, today was the day he turned eighteen and officially became our Alpha. Today was the day he found his Luna - and..and that was the pathetic me.
Of course, I wouldn't know this until I turned eighteen.
I opened and closed my mouth like a goldfish. My vocal cords seemed in no mood to function.
Zara, meanwhile, was tap dancing in my head. I bit my lip nervously hoping this was just some silly prank.
His eyes seemed to darken at my actions and I knew his wolf was struggling to take control.
"Look" I began nervously, "I really had no idea about this Aden-"
That did it. In retrospect, I should've known better than to say my mate's name the first time we'd bonded. It set off their wolf. Threw their emotions into a frenzy.
The rest of my words were cut off when suddenly his lips came crashing down on mine. I struggled against him for a moment but then gave in.
Rational thinking flew out of my head as primal need took over. Instinctive; done in the heat of the moment. Reckless and guilty as charged but I was not in my right state of mind to choose otherwise.
They were tender yet demanding at the same time. It was as if he was trying to convey a thousand words through those peppered kisses across my skin. His touching was scorching; it left me reeling; it had me begging for me. It was insane to think how much a kiss could affect me so much. A kiss was just a form of affection, a former of displaying feeling, yet with Aden it felt so so much more.
It felt wrong as well as right the same time.
If I'm going to hell for kissing him back, might as well be fully guilty of the crime.
I felt his hands wrap around my waist bringing me closer to him. I moaned and my hands went around his neck as he deepened the kiss. I felt myself lifted off the ground and a sense of complete bliss swept through me. Within me, I felt Zara was almost delirious with joy.
His lips moved against mine, the friction creating sparks of tingles between us. I pulled him closer, unable to get enough of it. Within moments, I had discovered what I was likely to get addicted to.
We split a moment later for air and I gasped as I realized what I had done. I had ended up kissing the very guy who made the last three years of my life pure hell. No, this wasn't how I wanted my first kiss. Or even who I wanted it with. There was so much I needed to sort out before this. So much—
My hands presses against his chest as I pushed him off me.
But he didn't budge.
So I did the only thing I could think of next.
I slapped him hard.
Really hard.
Shock registered on his face the same time. I watched a thousand expressions flit across his face—from disbelief to surprise to sheer anger.
Even Zara was beyond pissed at my actions.
He snarled as he pushed me further into the wall. I struggled to keep myself from cowering.
"What do think you did?" He spoke deadly quiet.
I could see I had hurt his ego which he wouldn't take lightly. Even Zara shut up now wary of the fury building up inside.
"To think I had feelings for you! To think I defended you even at the cost of getting beaten up by my own father! God, how was I so fucking dumb to not see it!? Of course, you would play around with my feelings. This is because of him, isn't it? Him. The letters he never replied to—three years have gone by and you're still hung up on him—" He took in a deep breath. His eyes were still obsidian as rage and pain and turmoil all swirled beneath the surface. "Never mind, I know what needs to be done."
"Aden, please don't." I begged him. "Control yourself. You've gotten this all wrong."
My eyes burned with hot tears and it took me everything to control a sob.
But he was relentless.
"I wish we hadn't met. I wish I never fell for you. It's a shame it took me this long to figure it out. I don't want you as my mate, Kiara." He drew himself up to his full height. Gaze cold and hard. An unreadable glint flashed through his eyes before it's gone. "Never have. Never will."
* * *