--
Kaine
"Leigh! Can you bring me my shirt."
"Nig—Sir, I'm downstairs making dinner. Do you think that you can grab it yourself?"
I hope she did not forget that I was the one signing her check.
"It's downstairs, that's why I asked you Ms. Christian."
"Fight me Kaine Cole. I'm coming with your shirt now."
I heard a slight knock, "Come in."
"I see that you wanted to match me even though you didn't go to NYU."
She spread out my shirt then handed it to me.
It was true.
NYU was my dream school but instead I chose NC A&T and I finished at UCLA.
"Thanks for the shirt LC."
She eyed me as I put on my shirt. I caught her in the act leading her to immediately snap out of her dazed state.
"Ms. Christian to you.."
I walked toward her beautiful body. I towered over her with my 6'8 frame and her eyes shifted downward shyly. I fixed my mouth to say something to her.
"I-I gotta go finish dinner."
She rushed out of my bedroom.
I couldn't help but to laugh. It made me think of our first meeting—long ago.
...
Back in '09 I was the star wide receiver of Frederick Douglass High School. Fresh meat were entering the big bad world of Doug. My homeboys would always mess with the young Joans but I didn't want any parts of that illegal ass shit.
"Yo, son I think we found the perfect one for ya'." My teammate Frio pointed out, I was perfectly fine with my main bitch, Tori
I looked up and a tall, chubby girl, with braces, and glasses was walking in our direction. Her hair was curly and jet black, though, she was pretty, her face was full of red blemishes.
I laughed ,"What the fuck? You can have that...lil' Joan, she's not for me lil'nigga."
The crews laughs shook the main hall and they were so loud that a soft accented voice couldn't be heard,
"Excuse me."
"Aye y'all look it's Meg Griff'."
The young girl didn't respond to the joke—shit was pretty funny though.
"I'm not going to say it again, excuse me." She repeated calmly.
Everyone turned their heads and spectators surrounded us. We saw Derrick's facial expression and knew something was about to go down.
"Fat Bitch, who do you think you're talking to?"
I watched the encounter. The girl took off her glasses and looked directly up to Derrick.
"Nigga, You. Who the fuck are you anyways? Peon ass nigga, move out my fucking way, like I said. Rephrase that last remark,I dare you to. I gotta get to class just like everybody else."
It tripped me out that shorty had heart.
Frio, Derrick, Bobby, and Eazy circled around her—like I said I don't want no parts.
"Leave the young shorty alone.."
They all looked at me weird,
"What nigga? She didn't do shit."
"You buggin' Mack."
"Forreal son."
I glared at them they looked disappointed although I frankly don't give a fuck about their opinions—so I thought.
"I didn't need ya help."
I walked toward Braveheart,
"You couldn't have took four niggas who are way bigger than you on and you're a freshman, nobody would help you."
She was silent.
She fumbling with the lock on her locker. "What's the combo?"
She breathed out, "4-24-17"
I stood behind her since her locker was on top. She looked up at me and I admired her unique features she wasn't bad but she wasn't ugly either.
"Thanks...and I'm actually a sophomore."
"I'm Mack."
"Leigh."
--
That's how we met..
After that it all went to hell.
"Mr.Cole, dinner's ready..."
I loved the sound of that, it gave my home a—homey feeling.
Once I was downstairs, I seen Leigh making my plate. She didn't have to do that.
"There you go.."
As I looked at the table only my plate was there.
Why?
"Where's your plate Leigh?"
"Ka—Mr. Cole, I'm not eating with you. It's frowned upon in a normal sense to eat with your superior, unless it's a weird mandatory rule. I'll just take my salad upstairs. Plus I want to lay down with Noa.."
--
Leigh
Today has been long and eating with Kaine, reminded me of not only the kind of day that I had, but it reminded me of the general consensus of what people thought of me.
True, I didn't actually get an interview— he and I both knew I'd be capable.
But they didn't know that and there's really no true way to prove my worthiness, but our history, and nobody needs to dig those skeletons out of the closet
So, I don't mind staying low-key.
I don't know what'd I do if someone found out about our past.
Earlier today I was in the restroom and I heard my name pierce through the stalls, jealous female coworkers were spewing lies and fretting their own narratives about my arrival.
"I heard he got that new assistant pregnant and that's how she got the job. I mean look at her—she's using that baby as a way to get more money out of him , she just wants to look legit. That baby is like 18 months. That's when he went to South Africa. Came back real stressed."
"I did hear that the baby was his. But, baby can't be more than 24 months, he was all over the world then. But you can't deny that baby don't look like him."
"Boo. I think they're fucking. Do you see the way, he doesn't yell at her, he holds the door open for her, and everything. That baby ain't his. I know that for a fact."
"She's too fat. You know Kaine Cole only goes for the stick thin—damn near snow bunnies. And if she's pregnant now or if that baby is his, it had to be a one night stand."
"I had sex with him—I'm not a snow bunny. So that's not it."
"What's her name Lee? That's so country and manly."
I heard gasps, "Crystal you did not fuck Kaine Cole. He wouldn't touch your old ass with a ten foot pole. And you're right, you're not even close to one."
The women erupted in laughter.
I flushed the toilet and their conversation ceased.
I walked out of my stall in utter shock however I kept a straight face.
I smoothed out my dress and washed my hands, "Gon' head and keep talking, don't let my presence interrupt."
They didn't reply, remaining silent, they stared into space and in shock.
"By the way, when you talk about someone in the restroom make sure they're not inside it. My name is LEIGH. L-E-I-G-H bitch. We're all grown here, you could've just asked me—whether it's your business or not I would've at least clarified a few things. But to talk about my innocent child is bottom of the barrel. So sad that now you're about to lose your jobs."
I laughed to cover my pain.
Afterwards, I hadn't told Kaine of this incident. I instead focused on trying to meet up with LeSane. We've recently bumped into each other here and there, nothing serious, but the way he looks at me ...
Luckily, I bumped into him on my lunch break.
"Dubai! Hey.."
"Leigh.. hey! Wanna grab some food with me real fast?"
"Sure, you sure your girlfriend wouldn't mind?"
"Nah.." he smirked, I became crest fallen.
"Ion do relations unless it's someone special, like you. Now let's go eat, it's on me."
—
Though I thought I got over my insecurities of being fat and ugly..
Women could be mean.
I couldn't shake it, in middle school I was ridiculed for being stick thin and then puberty hit and my weight shifted drastically. It continues to fluctuate today.
I grew hips, thighs, breast, and a muffin top with additional rolls.
"But, Leigh you made all of this food—
"Mr.Cole.. It'll get stuck in my braces."
"We're at the house now.. You know you can still call me Kaine, LC."
"You said employees aren't allowed to call you Kaine. In this house I'm still an employee of yours, no matter how long we've known each other or what we've been through."
He looked at me and just nodded,
"Typical of you to never say anything, I'll be upstairs if you need me, Mr. Cole."
"Leigh.."
He sighed, "Leigh! You've always done this. What am I supposed to say? You're a grown ass woman. You make me look like and feel like the bad guy for being fucking nice to your stubborn ass! How would you like if—if someone pulled that type of shit on you?"
I continued to walk away, I didn't want to hear his bullshit. He was the bad guy and that's what he will always be in my heart, mind, and soul.
Til the day I die.
He ranted on following me very closely,
"You're still stuck in the past! You're never going to find anyone or get anywhere with that kind of thinking! Or that fucked up ass attitude! I am not the same Kaine, I was back in high school. I'm a grown ass man now. I'm not the enemy. Clearly. I'm helping you. How many times do I have to say that I'm sorry?"
"First, if you wake up my child, you'll be the one staying up all night. Not me. You never apologized for your actions. In fact I don't need nor want it Kaine. There's someone out there for me, a way better option than you. Friend, lover, enemy, or boss. I spent my last years in school hating you, hating myself, and everybody. I was miserable! You're so stuck in the past because you think that I'm that same naïve ass little girl that you can bully and manipulate and confuse. Well—I'm not. "
I exclaimed,
"After you left.. I thought that I was finally going to be happy that you were gone..Unfortunately I didn't have anyone to protect me anymore from bullies but you were like the main one doing the bullying at the same time, it was so confusing and I--"
"And what!"
"Stope yelling. I--I can't have this conversation with you. You confused me. It's over and done—it happened and we can't change that."
I ignored him calling my name. I didn't give a damn about his apology, he can keep it. He didn't feel bad then and he sure doesn't feel bad now. Nobody knows what I went through because of him in addition to with him. Kaine put me on this ride—an emotional roller coaster. It's odd that he can still have this affect on me...
--
Kaine
How did we even get here?
I ate my meal alone. I didn't have time to feel bad about something that happened when we were children.
I have bigger fish to fry. I have a business to run. White executives trying to destroy my company, no social life, and I'm not getting any younger.
If she wasn't over it by now maybe..she's the problem.
Maybe my friends and I did have an affect on her self esteem and ultimately her whole high school career.
Just maybe.
I wrapped up all of the food and washed the dishes.
As I walked up the spiral staircase I heard weeping.
I peaked into Leigh's room, she had her head phones in while under the cover and she had a glass of Chardonnay.
"Leigh."
"Leave me alone.."
"I just want to talk. You don't have to say anything. Just listen."
"Leave Kaine."
"Let's just start over. Clean slate."
I stepped closer until I reached the end of the bed and I sat. As I tried to pull the covers back she only pulled them back with more force.
"We can't start over because you caused me so much pain. It still hurts Kaine. It's sad that I continue to think about it everyday looking in the damn mirror. It's hard enough that you're my boss. Would you like it if someone talked about you and tortured you during the most developmental years of your life? Pulled a you on you? I used to drink so heavily, pop pills , smoke weed, and even fasted very often in order to feel—perfect."
"I even bought weed from your boys. Thinking it would help me lose weight and someway, somehow get me in good with the crew. Never smoked it though."
"You were suppose to stay away from that shit Leigh. I only did the things that I did to protect you."
"Fucking liar. To protect me from what? From you? You never did."
"You know that's not true.."
"Maybe, maybe not. You fed me so much bullshit that you started believing in your own lies. You couldn't see the real friend that was right in front of you, the eyes from behind you—me. Though you treated me terrible, I loved you for you and you hated me for it."
"I--"
"Only because I could see right through you unlike all of the fakes who were your so-called friends. Because I didn't look like your typical bitch."
"So from now on its boss and employee—no LC and Mack. Goodnight, Mr.Cole."
The truth hurt. I did some pretty fucked up shit.
However, I did it all to protect her from the street life, other niggas, and from myself.
For myself. For my sanity.
And for my own laughs—immature I know. It got worse and worse but she seemed so unaffected.
She could love me or even despise me for it. All I know is that this conversation isn't over but now that I've heard what she's feeling I kind of understand.
"You're right. We'll--uh, we'll talk about this some other time. I need you to reschedule my meeting and email the board. I'll be in my study."
"Take Noa. He's awake. I keep my promises. You woke him up."
--