You know those moments in your life when you simply don't know what to do?
Well, I pretty much felt like that as I stared wordlessly at the man in front of me. I just stared. He loved me... but he had kissed my sister.
He said he loved me... but he had touched my sister lips earlier.
What if I kiss him, I thought, and her saliva is still there?
I found myself thinking in the strangest things one could imagine. And then... the Cinderella story came to my mind.
If I was the ugly sister, why did James want to be with me? Maybe he wasn't the Prince Charming after all??
I shook my head mentally to take myself out of that reverie. Thinking about the Cinderella when the guy I wanted had just said he loved me!
"Lily?" James asked me as he, at last, let go of my arm. "You really don't have to say anything..."
Really now?, I thought, good, because I don't know what to say!
"What are you talking about?" A shrieking voice asked. We both turned and I was even more shocked than before. Maybe shocked isn't the right word. I was more like... speechless. Yes, that's it.
"Why are you lying like that? You kissed me!" I heard Petunia saying as both James and I stared at her. "How can you prefer that bitch instead of me!!"
James' jaw fell. What did you just called her?" he asked.
I smiled inside as Petunia was at a lost of words, "I... I... what does it matter??" she shouted at last "You have to love ME not her! She's ugly and fat and I'm... I'm... perfect!!"
I looked at James to see him shaking his head, "I should have believed Lily when she told me how you were. Now I know I picked the right sister. She's something you'll never be... she's not perfect, but I love her just like she is."
Petunia reddened in anger and I could swear that, just for some seconds, she seemed uglier than ever. Wow.
"I can't believe you did this!!" she screamed "She's just an ugly slut!"
"You can't talk about me like that!" I finally reacted.
She turned her angry glare on me, "You... you! You always wanted this, didn't you? Get something I wanted? Something that was mine? I hate you, witch!" she said, "I hate all wizards! You... you... freaks!" she screamed, before turning on her heel and running back to the house.
I stared after her incredulously.
And then I felt it. James grabbed my hand and led me back to the middle of the glade. And- the music in the house still being heard and the fairies coming back- he started leading me, dancing with me.
"Let's forget about her." He said "I'm happy this is over with."
He then smiled and approached his mouth to my hear, whispering, "I said I'd show you the fairies."
Those simple words sent shivers all through my body. "Mmhmmh." I answered half consciously.
Even after all I had heard from him, from my sister and all the dancing, I was still stuck in the part he said "I love you."
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James and I danced through the night, even when the music stopped.
When fatigue finally took over me, James took me home where- fortunately- the twins and my sister were already asleep.
No other word about us was exchanged that night, not did I answered him that I loved him as well.
"Bon jour, Evans!" I heard a perfectly trained chorus singing.
"Let me sleep." I mumbled to my pillow as I tried to get back to sleep.
"Oh, non, non, non!" someone said "Get up! We need to know where you were last night!"
Last night, I thought, as I tiny smile flourished to my lips.
"Lillian!"
"It's Lily!"
They laughed, "Just tell us. We are even making the sacrifice of speaking English for you."
I laughed too as I sat up in bed. "James took me outside." I said.
Their face hardened. "James? The same James who kissed Petunia? The same James for who you were crying in a bathroom? That James?" Mado asked.
I nodded, "Yes, that James." I said "He told me he kissed her because he was confused."
"And you believed?" Elodie asked.
"I don't know what to believe," I admitted. "But he said he loved me."
Mado shook her head. "You didn't believe him, did you?"
"I just told you I don't know what to believe in! And I didn't answer him as well. We just spent the rest of the night dancing."
They were silent as they took in the new information. "Don't believe him. Not yet." Mado said at last, "he might even be saying the truth, but I don't want you to get hurt again."
I shook my head. "You know I'm not stupid Mado. I won't fall to his arms just like that. But, if you want to know, Petunia heard him declaring himself."
Their eyes widened as a large grin spread through their faces. "What happened?" Elodie asked.
I frowned. "Well, she was completely hysteric and said he couldn't choose me instead of her and ended up saying she hated all wizards. Said we were freaks."
The twins laughed, "I guess she won't be marrying any wizard now." Mado said, as I laughed with her.
"Qu'est ce que tu va faire?" Elodie asked me. ("What are you going to do?")
I smirked, "What about the sacrifice of speaking English?" I asked. Mado punched my arm lightly as they pouted.
"Lillian!" Mado pleaded.
"C'est Lily!" ("It's Lily!")
They laughed, "Just answer." Elodie said.
My smiled got smaller somehow, "I don't really know," I said "I guess I'll just... wait to see what happens."
Elodie put a comforting arm on my shoulder, "It'll be alright, you know it. Il t'aime" ("he loves you.")
I smiled, "I hope he really does," I sighed, "Moving on, what happened to you two last night? I didn't see you after leaving to dance with Tiago."
Mado sighed and Elodie smirked. "Okay..." I said carefully, "Why do I think something's wrong in this? Shouldn't Elodie be sighing and Mado be smirking?"
They shook their heads. "Elodie- how do you British people say it?" Mado asked as I punched her lightly. "Oh yes, snogged Remus!"
"What?" I asked, shocked. Elodie never, and I mean never, kissed a guy she just met. Mado, by the other hand, did it all the time. So you can imagine how that was a shock to me.
"Elodie!" I said, "You kissed my tutor?"
She smirked again. "I did." She said "And I cannot say I regret it."
I hugged her as I laughed. "What about you Mado? I thought you would snog Sirius as well! It's what both of you do!"
"Well," she started "I was. But then I spoke to Fiona and it didn't seem right to me."
I rolled my eyes, "That never stopped you before." I told her.
She shrugged. "No, but I was in debt with the girl. She took care of you after all."
"Thanks, then."
She nodded. "So," Elodie started "How about a breakfast like the ones we did in France?"
I rolled my eyes. "I believe it's a tad bit too cold for ice-creams."
She smiled, "It doesn't matter! C'mon! Please Lily?"
The twins both pouted at me and I had no other chance but to agree. "Fine, c'mon!"
Laughing, the three of us exited my room and made our way to the kitchen.
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Unfortunately for me, the weekend passed way too fast.
My sister- although she was always glaring at me and whispering "freaks" when she saw me- was nothing compared with the joy I had in having my friends with me. Charlotte too stopped by and met them.
On Sunday afternoon, the four of us- me, Charlotte, Mado and Elodie- went to the Potter's fireplace so the twins could travel to Beauxbatons and Charlotte and I to Hogwarts.
After saying goodbye and shedding some tears, the twins were gone. Minutes later, Charlotte and I arrived at the Headmaster's office.
"Ahh!" Professor Dumbledore said as he saw us, "I see you have arrived. How was the party?"
I raised an eyebrow at him, "Uh... sir, you were there." I pointed out.
He smiled, "Yes, I was. But the same party can be seen from different points of view."
I smiled too. "It's was nice."
He smiled knowingly, "You may go now," he said as his eyes twinkled behind the half moon glasses "I believe everyone else has already arrived."
Both Charlotte and I nodded as we exited the Headmaster's office.
We spoke animatedly about the weekend as we walked to our common room. Once there, Alice, Meagan, Fiona and Anna were sitting in front of the fireplace, and they all greeted us as we sat next to them. I couldn't help but feel sorry for Anna as I looked at her. She couldn't be with the person she loved. I caught her eye and smile, as she smiled back.
"So, how was the party?" Meagan asked me "Fiona and Alice have been telling me about it, but Alice can only speak about this Frank and Fiona about men who didn't know how to dance!"
I looked at Fiona and she smirked at me. I raised an eyebrow and she shook her head. I nodded. We had just made a non-spoken agreement of no talking about what happened to me.
"Well, I danced with this Ravenclaw guy, Tiago, who was a really great dancer." I told her "But other than that, it was a normal ball."
Meagan sighed, "Oh, how I'd like to have gone!" she said "Anyway, that Tiago isn't the one who has a crush on Fiona? I mean, since last year he has been chasing her! Stalking her, really. He's a quidditch player, you know? Plays beater for Ravenclaw. But Fiona won't give him the time of the day, all because she's so madly in love with Sirius Black..."
As Meg said that words, I looked at Anna to see if she had any reaction at all. To my surprise- for it was something I had never noticed before- she looked at the floor and gulped. Wow. She still liked Sirius! How could she be dating Shaun??
"Meagan, rambling alert." Alice said, "Anyway, you have to meet Frank. He's super cute and nice and he's just so sweet and-"
"Rambling alert, Alice." Fiona said as we all laughed. Alice blushed, but ended up laughing too.
The portrait hole opening made us change the focus of our attention. The Marauders were getting in. My eyes locked with Remus' and I smirked at him, making him blush. Then, I noticed Sirius, who looked once at Anna and quickly focused his eyes on something else. Peter was in his own world as well and at last came James.
I had done my best to avoid him during the weekend, and I must say I was rather good at that. So, as I saw him now and our eyes locked, all I did was bit my lower lip. He smiled at me and, as he passed up, ruffled my hair before continuing his way to his dormitory.
I locked eyes with Fiona who gave me a confused look. I remembered she still didn't know about what had happened later. With a movement of my eyes I pointed to our dormitory. She nodded discretely and I stood up. "Excuse me, girls, but I need to see my wonderful bed again!" I said.
They laughed. "Go ahead Lily." Charlotte said, "I'll stay a little longer and wait for Sophia."
Sophia was her friend from first year. I nodded and started climbing the stairs.
Once in my room, I sat and waited. After a few minutes, the door opened and Fiona entered, sitting next to me. "Now," she said. "What was that all about?"
Then, in a heart beat, I told her everything that had happened after I had been dancing with Tiago.
She heard as she wrinkled her eyebrows in thought, "So, you didn't answer?" Fiona asked me.
I nodded. "No, I didn't."
She nodded. "And what are you going to do now?"
I shrugged, "I have no idea," I said honestly "I mean, he did kiss my sister."
"Yeah, and then he declared himself to you and completely humiliated your sister." Fiona pointed out, "he seems to know what he wants."
"I know..." I answered, "What would you do if it was you and Sirius?"
She smirked, "Jump on his ruddy self, what you think?" I smiled, "But you can't do that with James, he's different from Sirius."
I nodded, "I know."
She rolled her eyes, "Man, life's difficult for you." she said.
I laughed. "Don't do anything." Fiona said. I stared at her confusedly, "Just wait to see what he does next."
I nodded, "Yeah, you're right. That's exactly what I'll be doing."
We laughed again as we exited the dormitory and descended to the common room.
Who, in the beginning of the year, would say I'd be talking about love with Fiona?
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"Good morning." I looked up from my breakfast Monday morning to see the Marauders sitting next to me and the girls. As always.
"Morning." I said, as I returned my attention to my toast.
"So, was the ball eventful or what?" Sirius asked suddenly.
I almost chocked on my toast as he spoke. I had to take a large gulp of my juice to settle back. "You alright, Lily?" James asked me.
I cleaned my mouth with the napkin as Alice gave light taps on my back, "Yeah," I said at last, "I'm fine."
Sirius smirked at me. James must have told him about what happened. Idiots... I rolled my eyes, "But really Lily, those two friends of yours... you never told us you had friends like that!" said Sirius.
My time to smirk, I thought. "They are really great, aren't they?" I asked, "But I heard Mado rejected you..."
Everyone around the table snickered at that. Sirius pouted, "Yeah, I didn't get that. How come Remus snogged one of them and I didn't?"
Remus blushed profusely from his spot, but didn't say anything.
"I was surprised too!" I said "I mean, Mado's the one who always had one day things. Elodie rarely does that!"
Sirius shook his head, "The world is so strange..."
I laughed at him. "I never met those friends of yours, did I?" James asked me.
"Two aren't enough?" Sirius asked as I was going to answer.
My happiness was gone in that same second. Glaring at Sirius, I stood up. "I'll be going to class." I said.
"I'm going too." Anna said, also standing up.
James- who was sitting next to me- also motioned to stand up, but I put a hand on his shoulder, not letting him.
He, completely ignoring that fact, stood up anyways, picking up an apple to eat on the way. "I'll see you guys later." He said, then stalking me out of the Great hall.
Anna, seeing the tension between us, immediately said goodbye and went to meet Shaun in his table.
"Can I make you company?" he asked, as he ate his apple.
I rolled my eyes, "Would it matter if I said 'no'?" I asked with a smirk.
He laughed, "No, it wouldn't."
"Then I rest my case."
He was silent as he finished his fruit while I started walking with no place in mind, "Where are you going?" James asked me finally.
"Je ne sais pas." I answered him. ("I don't know").
He raised an eyebrow at me, "You don't know? What are you having first?" he asked.
"Charms," I answered quickly.
"Then you're not going in the right way."
I sighed exasperatedly. Didn't he get that I knew I wasn't going in the right way? Didn't he get that I just wanted to walk?
"Then tell me the way to the Charms classroom, please." I asked with as much sarcasm as I could.
"What have I done to you?" he asked me.
"Nothing."
"Then why are you using that tone on me?"
I sighed, "I'm not using a specific tone on you, James." I said, turning to face him "C'mon, lead the way if you will."
He nodded but kept stealing glances at me as we walked, "You never answered me." he stated.
I didn't say anything as we walked through the hallways, "If you don't like me back you just have to say it." he continued.
Again, I didn't say anything. I heard him sigh, "You could say something now."
We were arriving to the charms classroom, but, in a soft but quick movement, James pushed me into a room to our left. The trophy room.
I should've seen that coming, I thought. We were talking about James Potter after all!
"Kidnapping me again? Tsk, tsk... This is the third time, Potter." I said teasingly.
But he left me no space to talk. Smiling in a mischievous way, in a sharp move he grabbed me by the waist, pulling me closer to him and encircled me with his arms. His lips crashed into mine and I felt the world spinning, just like every time he kissed me.