FAITH, HOPE AND LOVE

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With all the strength that I possessed in me, I took my hands to his chest and pushed him away from me. What I had done started to get back to me. That was definitely not a friend's kiss, I thought.

"You can't just do this," I said, gaining back my senses "Push me into a room and kiss me like that!"

James smiled as he tried to lead in for another kiss, but I pushed him away. He frowned, "What's wrong?" he asked me, as I walked away from him.

"I'm not sure about this," I said, gesturing to the two of us. James frown deepened.

"What are you not sure about?" he asked me bemused.

"You did kiss her." I said rather lamely.

He groaned as he covered his face with his hands and, when he discovered them, he was looking me in the eyes, "I thought we had that figured out already," he said "I love you, what do you want me to do so you can believe me?"

I shook my head as I gave him a small smile, "I believe you already, you needn't do anything. But it's just... confusing."

"I don't get you," he told me as he sat down in a chair he had just conjured, "I know you feel something for me, and I won't believe you if you say you don't."

I nodded, "I wouldn't believe me too if I said that," I admitted "But I... I don't know James..."

He smiled "What's there not to know?" he asked me, walking up to me and taking my hands in his, "I want you, you want me. Simple as that."

I smiled as I traced his lips and jaw with my fingers. He was so handsome; that messy hair of his always sticking up at the back, as if he had just gotten out of his broom; his eyes, so green from such close proximity... it just didn't feel right to think he'd end up with someone like me.

I felt I wasn't enough for him. "Are you sure you do?" I asked, and his face was even more one of puzzlement, "What if this is simply... a thing of the moment?" I asked, "What if you-"

He silenced my protests with his finger, "this isn't a thing of the moment," he said "C'mon, after all that happened with your sister back at the ball you still think it could ever be?"

"I don't know..."

He smiled as he hugged me, "It's not," he said "You're still young, so I understand you may have some doubts. But I'm older, I'll be entering the real world. I know what I want."

I laughed, "Young? I'm just a year younger than you!"

He laughed too, "You know what I meant."

I nodded as once again pulled him away from me, "I'm... I'm not sure." I said.

"What do you want me to do? Announce to my parents that I want you? Tell the entire school, announce it on the prophet? Because if you do, just tell me, I'll do it!"

I shook my head, "no," I said "I don't want any of those things. Just give me time. To think."

He nodded and half smiled as he looked up at me, "Sure," he said "Of course."

I smiled too as I walked out of the trophy room with a confident walk, when on the inside all I did was shake. What was I doing? I had just said "no" to James. James. The guy I liked... the guy I loved. There must be something wrong with me, I thought as I finally walked to the Charms classroom.
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"You're quiet," Fiona noticed later that night as the two of us, Meg, Alice and Anna sat in the common room by the window. Charlotte was already sleeping and the Marauders were nowhere to be seen. I could almost bet they all had been avoiding me the entire day, for I hadn't seen any of the four.

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