It was a little after 3am when Krystal suddenly woke up. She lay in her sleeping bag on the ground for a moment, wondering why she wasn't in her own bed. But slowly, Krystal's dream-addled brain remembered the sleepover from last night, and she also remembered that her f(x) members were actually sleeping right next to her.
"Oh yeah..." Krystal said to herself sleepily. She sat up slowly and listened to the peaceful sounds of her members breathing deeply, each one still enchanted by sleep. To her immediate left, Sulli was sleeping soundly. After the difficult emotions that Sulli expressed last night, Krystal was grateful that her soul mate was able to sleep well.
To Krystal's immediate right was Amber. Or rather, it was Amber's empty sleeping bag. Krystal managed to roll her tired eyes at the sight of waking up and not finding Amber where she had left her. It wasn't anything new to Krystal.
In order to not disturb her sleeping members, Krystal quietly slid out of her sleeping bag and crept out of the half-open bedroom door. She was extremely tired, but she was also curious where Amber had run off to. The bathroom was unoccupied and there was nowhere else to go on this upper floor besides Jessica's room and her parents' room, so Krystal headed downstairs to the lower floor.
"Good morning, Princess-nim," Amber greeted her cheerfully after Krystal reached the first floor landing. The older girl was relaxing on the living room sofa looking quite awake even though it was very early in the morning.
Krystal gave Amber a sleepy glare and headed for the sofa. She threw herself onto its cushions and onto Amber, resting her head on Amber's lap and using it as a pillow. The two of them were used to this kind of skinship long before they confessed to each other, and Krystal had no reason to believe that this behavior would suddenly become uncomfortable to Amber. As if confirming that assumption, Amber reached down and began to stroke Krystal's hair while the younger girl lay in her lap.
"Couldn't sleep?" Amber asked, running her fingers through Krystal's long locks of black hair.
"Same to you," Krystal mumbled, keeping her eyes closed. "How long have you been awake?"
"Don't be mad, but... I never went to sleep."
"Whaaaaaaat?" Krystal exclaimed, very annoyed. She sat up and glared at Amber again.
"You're cute when you do that," Amber said with a playful smile, but Krystal's expression remained unchanged. Wordlessly, Krystal climbed onto Amber's lap and wrapped her arms around Amber's neck. Amber wrapped her arms around Krystal's waist, bringing them even closer together.
"You're still bothered by whatever happened before, aren't you?" Krystal asked.
"Maybe," agreed Amber, "but this is making me feel much better." Krystal pulled back from the hug and continued to glare at Amber even though Amber was smiling playfully at her. "Come on," Amber cutely pleaded, "smile a little." Amber poked her repeatedly in the cheek until Krystal cracked the slightest hint of a smile.
"Stop it," Krystal complained, pushing Amber's hand away after she broke the glare. "Be serious. Tell me why you were upset earlier. Was it what Jessica said?"
"No, but what did she say?"
Krystal hesitated, not sure if she wanted to repeat her sister's words since Amber hadn't heard it in the first place. "After I pretended to kiss you earlier, she told me to stop being gross..."
"I actually heard her say that." Amber admitted, "but it didn't bother me at all. It bothers you though, right? You wouldn't have brought it up otherwise."
Krystal quirked an eye at Amber, who knew her far too well. "It bothers me a little," Krystal admitted. She scooted off Amber's lap and rested her head on Amber's shoulder. Amber put her arm around Krystal and pulled her closer. "But should it not bother me? I mean, Jessica probably didn't really mean it, right?"
"Knowing your sister and how much she loves you, she didn't mean it like you think she meant it," Amber said. "She was probably just joking around because you were just joking around about kissing me."
There was something odd about the way Amber had said that last sentence. "You were just joking around about kissing me." Krystal caught the subtle difference in Amber's voice, and she quickly turned to look at Amber.
"Is that the reason you were mad at me earlier?" Krystal asked. "Because I was joking around about the kiss?"
"Yeah... it was the kiss," Amber admitted sheepishly. "But honestly, I wasn't mad at you."
Krystal scoffed at Amber's claim. "You were totally mad at me earlier."
"I was not!" Amber laughed. "I was... surprised I guess?"
"Yeah, right," teased Krystal. As Amber playfully glared back at her, much like Krystal had glared at Amber just moments ago, Krystal felt wonderfully at ease. All of her problems always seemed so simple when she was able to discuss her feelings with Amber. If only Krystal had been able to talk to Amber earlier when the kiss (or non-kiss) had happened, Krystal was certain that it wouldn't have made Krystal feel so uneasy earlier.
Krystal took Amber's hand, gently rubbing her fingers across Amber's wrist. "Just admit it, you were mad."
"I was not!" Amber claimed again, laughing. "Look, I'll prove it to you. Close your eyes."
"Are you gonna kiss me?" Krystal wondered. She was joking, but at the same time the thought made her feel nervous.
"I'm not gonna kiss you," Amber said, smirking. "Just close your eyes." Krystal obediently did as she was told. "OK, now I want you to think back to our debut stage."
"The LA chA TA showcase?"
"The LA chA TA showcase," Amber confirmed. "Think of the first time that we performed as a group for a live audience. Do you remember how nervous we felt as we were waiting for the performance to start?"
With her eyes still closed, Krystal nodded vigorously. She pressed her fist against her heart and scrunched her eyes shut. "My heart was beating so fast that I thought it was gonna explode."
Amber laughed gently. "Yeah, that sounds about right. And do you remember how we felt after we were done?"
"Yeah, it was weird. I was filled with adrenaline and I couldn't believe that we had debuted. I felt like I was going crazy. It was so surreal..." Krystal trailed off as she realized the point that Amber was trying to make. Krystal's joke of pretending to kiss Amber on the lips had made Amber feel the same as when they had first debuted. And as much as Krystal regarded their debut as a happy memory, she didn't think she could endure another experience that was as intensely emotional as that initial LA chA TA stage had been.
"OK, Am, I get it. Can I open my eyes now?" Krystal wondered, but Amber didn't respond. "Amber?" Krystal opened her eyes and was surprised to find that Amber had moved her face to within inches of Krystal's. It was an unexpected sight for Krystal, and she squawked in surprise before throwing herself backwards, away from Amber.
"Oh my god!" Krystal hissed at Amber, glancing towards the stairs to see if anyone had woken up from her outburst. Krystal turned and started punching a gleeful looking Amber in the shoulder. "What the hell do you think you're doing?" she whispered loudly through gritted teeth.
Unable to contain herself, Amber burst out laughing at Krystal's response. She held a finger to her lips to shush Krystal, but Amber's laughter stopped her from actually making the "shhhhh" sound. Still laughing, Amber accepted the first few blows before trying to catch Krystal's fists in order to stop the incoming attacks. They fought wordlessly for several moments with Amber's mischievous grin dominating Krystal's fiercely angry smile. In the end, they both gave up amicably out of fatigue.
"Sorry," Amber said at last as they both leaned back onto the couch and rested. "But I'd say we're even now."
"Even my ass," Krystal muttered, annoyed. "You surprised the hell out of me just now."
Amber smiled at her mischievously. "Did you think I was gonna kiss you?"
"Yes--no--I don't know," Krystal exclaimed in frustration. She threw herself backwards onto the sofa cushions, still reeling from the sudden surge of adrenaline.
Amber sympathetically patted her on the leg with a laugh. "Yeah, I know the feeling."
"I'm sorry I surprised you like that with people watching," Krystal apologized with complete sincerity. "I would have been upset, too."
"Thanks," Amber said, accepting the apology. "But honestly, it wasn't the surprise factor that upset me."
"Oh really? Then why were you upset about the kiss?" Krystal wondered. A coy smile broke across her lips. "Was it because we actually didn't kiss? Because we can fix that right now..."
With a look of mild disbelief, Amber held up a hand up a hand to stop Krystal from leaning into her. "Wow, and people thing I make jokes at inappropriate times."
Krystal laughed and bit her lower lip apologetically. "OK sorry, my bad. So why were you upset about the kiss then?"
"...promise you won't laugh?"
Krystal held up her hand. "Promise."
"I've always imagined having this perfect first kiss with you..." Amber admitted shyly, looking down. Her voice was soft, but clear. "We'd be hanging out alone together somewhere, just the two of us. We wouldn't be doing anything special, but at the same time it WAS special because we were together. And we'd be talking and laughing and having a good time, and all of the sudden... you would lean in to me and kiss me because you loved me. And it would be simple, and it would be easy, and it would feel more right than anything we'd ever done together before."
Amber slowly lifted her gaze and their eyes met each other. Krystal's heart melted as she realized just how beautiful Amber's eyes were.
"When you pretended to kiss me earlier," Amber continued, "I thought you were really gonna kiss me. And it upset me because I thought you were going to throw away our first kiss for a few laughs from our friends."
"Am, I'm sorry... I didn't mean to..." Krystal said contritely, feeling terrible for her inconsiderate actions earlier.
"You didn't," Amber told her reassuringly, "it wasn't a real kiss, so it's fine. But it was hard to get over the initial shock of thinking that THAT was going to be our first kiss. Like you saw, I didn't recover from the shock very well."
Krystal nodded sympathetically and touched Amber's face gently, still feeling apologetic. "You have to let me make it up to you."
"There's nothing for you to make up for," Amber said earnestly. "I definitely overreacted over nothing."
"No, you didn't, I shouldn't have done that to you," Krystal said. She jumped up in frustration, still full of adrenaline. "Come on, there's gotta be something I can do to make it up to you."
"You realize it's YOUR birthday, right?" Amber teased. "If anything, I should be the one doing stuff for you today." She got up and put her hands on Krystal's shoulders. "Besides, we're already even, right?"
Krystal rolled her eyes and looked at Amber with a pout. "I feel really bad though..."
"Oh really?" Without warning, Amber lifted Krystal at the waist and spun her in a circle. Krystal smiled and hugged Amber's shoulders. Krystal loved it when people did this to her, but she loved it even more that it was Amber spinning her now. When Amber finally set her down, Krystal felt considerably happier.
"You're the best, Am," Krystal said shyly, still clinging to Amber's shoulders. She felt the safest and most at ease when she was in Amber's arms. "No one takes care of me like you do."
"Obviously," Amber replied without any modesty. "A princess like you deserves the best servant, does she not?"
"What did I do to deserve you?" Krystal quietly asked, looking into Amber's eyes.
Amber smiled back at her affectionately and spoke so softly that Krystal barely caught her words. "I've asked myself that question every day since the day I met you."
Amber leaned in slowly, letting the tip of her nose touch Krystal's. Neither of them said anything, their eyes focused entirely on each other. Krystal parted her lips gently and Amber did the same. She closed her eyes and let her instincts take over. Krystal couldn't tell which of them initiated the next move, but in an instant her lips were pressed against Amber's in a warm kiss. Her arms were still around Amber's shoulders and their mouths moved together in perfect unison, like two halves of a puzzle that belonged together.
"Wow," Krystal breathed, resting her forehead against Amber's. They looked at each other shyly, trying to catch their breaths. "Is that how you imagined it?"
"More or less," Amber said with a playful smile.
"What came after our first kiss in your imagination?"
"Another kiss," Amber said, pressing her lips against Krystal's again. Krystal smiled, more than eager to receive Amber's kiss.
It was impossible for Krystal to describe how right it felt to be kissing Amber. She had only kissed two other people in her life, and both of them were actors from dramas. Those kisses had been scripted and awkward and had required many takes before a director decided that the kiss was "good". But with Amber, from the very first take of their unscripted kiss, Krystal knew that they had gotten it right from the start.
They collapsed onto the couch after a very languid second kiss feeling deliriously happy.
"I don't know how we've ever been anything but this," Krystal said, looking over to Amber with a bright smile.
"Me either," Amber agreed, looking just as happy.
"Come on," Krystal said, standing up and tugging on Amber's hand. "We need to get you to bed. We've gotta wake up soon."
"Wait, just..." Amber pulled her back onto the sofa and cuddled against her. "One more minute like this before we go?"
Krystal smiled and patted Amber on the head. "Yeah, anything for you."