♪-Chapter- 26
When darkness comes upon you
And covers you with fear and shame.
Be still and know that I'm with you
And I will say your name.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
“I’m switching what?” I ask dully, slouched in my chair.
“Sit up,: my mother commands, shooting me a displeased look as Carmina sits beside me, smelling like fresh rose out of a bottle.
My mother paces the kitchen, a magazine clutched in her palms as my father lounges on the kitchen island, typing away on his laptop.
“You’re switching schools with Carmina,” my mother repeats like I was daft.
“Why?” I snap. “I’m a senior. I can’t just switch.”
“Watch it Aria. We’ve put up with your desolate, sullen mood lately but no more. You’re switching and that’s final.”
“Why?” I repeat.
She slaps the magazine in her hand onto the table and involuntarily, I flinch.
On the cover, a familiar boy with icy grey ices and a handsome smile grins alluringly at the camera, a guitar perched on his knee. My heart stops and I suck in a shaky breath, my eyes prickling. It’s been three weeks and I’ve had no response from teegan. I was beginning to wonder if what we had was only a fleeting dream.
Only the faded picture of us convinced me otherwise.
The magazine page is titled, California’s Golden Boy to attend William Heights High.
Controlling my emotions, I force myself to glance up at my mother through my eyelashes; my lips form a straight line. “So…”
My mother rolls her eyes muttering something about stupidity but just as she is about to respond, I feel Carmina’s icy fingers latch onto my arm.
Grunting in surprise and discomfort, I try to detach myself but she clings tighter. “He is so hot. We would be so great together,” she gushes.
I clench my fists, tightening my jaw.
I close my eyes.
“I’m not going to switch highschool just for you to pursue your new love interest,” I growl out, roughly jerking my arm away so Carmina slips off of her chair.
“Carmina!” my mother exclaims, rushing to her.
Carmina waves her off, glaring at me. “You’re going to deny me my true love?”
Anger blazes within me at what she just called him. Love? Love?
I scoff, laughing at her. With three pair of eyes trained on me, I stand up roughly, my chair scraping back as I look down at Carmina and my mother on the floor.
“Aren’t you ashamed? Such shallow dreams, thoughts,” I cast disdainfully down at Carmina. “People.”
“Aria,” my mother snaps.
“I’m going to bed,’ I mutter, turning around to exit.
“If you don’t switch, we won’t fund your college.”
I freeze, grinding my teeth. Spinning around, I stare at my mother who stands up, dusting herself off.
“You want to get away, don’t you?” she asks me. I don’t respond. “You have nothing without us. All we ask is that you write the songs and transfer to this new highschool for your last year. After that, we’ll give you everything you need to go as far away as you want.” My mother tells me, approaching me.
I exhale slowly.
One year.
“Of course,” my mother continues, reaching up to cup my cheek. “We would miss you but you’re old enough to know the facts now.”
I just stare at her as she smiles softly at me, triumphant.
Placing my hands over hers, I remove her hand from my face, numbly turning around and exiting the room.
Stopping at the base of the stairs, I stare at the ground, my hand lingering on the railing.
One year.
Then I could leave this town for good.
No Carmina. No family. No lies. No Teegan.
With a small pang of my heart and a clog in my throat, I grab my house keys and leave through the front door.
~*~
“I missed you babe, but your killing me here,” Zach yawns, standing at his door.
“Shut up,” I mutter, pushing past him to get into his house.
“Come right in,” he says sarcastically.
“Thanks,” I joke halfheartedly.
Closing the door, he leads me to the kitchen.
“Hey Aria,” his mother greets me.
“Hello Mrs. Canter,” I say politely, following Zach out to his living room.
Turning around, he shuts the double doors as I sit cross-legged on one of his couches sullenly.
“Can’t sleep?” he asks me.
I shrug. “It’s gotten…better.”
“I can’t believe it’s been three weeks,” he mutters mostly to himself.
I don’t respond. It’s been three weeks. I haven’t seen or heard from teegan.
The worst was the first week. I waited and waited but he never came.
The songbook? I couldn’t even have the heart in me to hide it. It still lay on my dresser, the photo tucked away forever.
No explanation for why he left my life so quickly.
He never even broke it off with me.
“Aria?” Zach asks, waving a hand in front of my face.
“Hm?”
He whistles lowly. “You’re a mess.”
I only glare at him, leaning back on the couch.
“Do you want to talk?’ he asks me hesitantly.
I laugh.
“You? Talk?” I laugh harder. “You suck at emotional support. I just didn’t want to be alone right now and Blythe is probably sleeping.”
“She it,” he responds easily.
I wiggle my eyebrows at him and he ducks his head, embarrassed. “You would know.”
At least it was good to know Blythe and Zach were getting closer.
“Has he…said anything to you?” I ask slowly after our laughter dwindles away.
“Aria-,” Zach begins to warn me.
I cut him short. “I know. I know you don’t want me to linger on it but-“ my voice cracks and I feel like crying.
I stop.
All I had of him was the songbook, photo and a couple songs that he sang on my iPod that he had saved for me.
I missed him so much. I missed his embrace, his sweet smell, and his laughter. I missed everything.
I was so pathetic.
Zach wraps an arm around me, letting me rest my head on his shoulder.
“I’m not defending him right now, he screwed up, but he’s going through this pretty tough too.”
He doesn’t elaborate and I don’t ask further, allowing myself to just sit there and think.
“I’m switching to his school.”
“You mean or school?” Zach asks, excited.
“I guess,” I reply, blandly.
Zach scoffs at me. “At least try to sound happy that you’re going to see me.”
I roll my eyes. “Forgive me your highness.”
“Off with your head.”
A comfortable silence settles between us and Zach stands up, throwing a pillow and blanket at me.
“Sleep a little,” he tells me.
“Your mom-“ I begin.
“You’re like family now. It’s not the fist time you’ve come here,” he reminds me.
He was right. I was coming her often.
I smile wearily. “Thanks Zanch.”
“Watch is Cadence. You may be sad but I can still kick your butt.”
“Sure you can,” I reply, yawning.
“Night you little twerp,” he tells me, ruffling my hair before slipping out.
I lay there for a couple moments, fingering the sheets.
After a few moments of debate, I grab my iPod and plug in my earphones. Finding the song, I close my eyes and just listen, his soft voice filling my ears.
My heart clenches as I hear his voice again. Singing smoothly over the words and notes, Teegan’s voice brings a familiar comfort and I slowly to drift to sleep.
~*~
Teegan POV-
I hate everything right now.
I stumble up the steps to Zach’s house, pounding on the door.
I felt dizzy and giddy at the same time while trying not to puke. The door flies open and Zach stands there tired.
What time was it? Two in the morning?
“Hey,” I slur, leaning on the doorway.
“Drunk? Really? Again?” Zach growls out.
I laugh hard. He was so funny.
A hard fist connects with my face, sending me flying back.
“What the heck man?” I burp, squinting with pain. That would leave a bruise.
“Aria can’t sleep. She’s hurting and you bring this drunk bull crap here?” Zach yells at me.
I stand up sloppily, stumbling over to him and grabbing a hold of his shirt within my hands.
“Don’t say her name,” I fumble out. How dare he speak about her? My heart clenches and I wish I had another beer.
“Why? You don’t own her?” he challenges me.
I laugh, shaking. “It’s for her own good, man.”
Zach scoffs in disbelief, shoving me off.
“tell me that after you see Aria curled up on my couch right now.
I blink, trying to regain my surrounding.
“She’s…here?”
“yeah.”
I think I am going to be sick.
Stumbling forward, I shove Zach aside, squinting hard and try to sober up.
I had to see her first, and then I would pass out in a puddle of my puke.
“are you crazy? Everyone is asleep!” Zach hisses behind me.
“It’s cool bro,” I slur, waving behind me as I run into a drawer.
Whoops.
Zach grabs my arm leading the way. Opening the doors, he lets me in before exiting them, closing them again for privacy.
It was just me and Aria.
I clear my throat, watching her peaceful, sleeping form.
I was no good.
Inching forward, I reach the edge of her couch, her curled up frame small.
Hesitating, I run the back of my hand down her temple to the base of her neck, stroking her cheek.
I missed this.
I missed her.
My throat clenches and my ears begin to ring.
How long would I have?
Two months? Two weeks? Two hours? Before my hearing left for good.
Who would want to help a deaf man then?
My eyes burn and I feel a tear escape my eyes.
I laugh quietly. What a wimp. Crying.
It was the alcohol.
“I’m sorry love. I’m sorry I couldn’t keep up together,” I whisper softly, stooping low to kiss her lips softly.
I pull back, my hands still on her cheek.
Man I was dizzy.
This was it.
Just as I begin to pull back, I freeze when I feel Aria’s hand move to clutch mine, holding it against her cheek.
Her eyes were still closed, her breathing steady. She was still asleep.
I just stare at her, afraid to move.
“Teegan?” she mumbles in her sleep, tossing.
She twists and I lurch forward, barely stopping myself from collapsing on top of her, my arm tucked underneath her.
“Teegan,” she repeats, the space between her brows furrowed.
Moon light streams through the windows, lighting her face, centimeters from mine.
“Teegan,” she repeats.
“I’m here baby. Right here,” I choke out.
She smiles softly in her sleep, clutching my hand tightly.
“Stay.”
Swallowing hard, I carefully sit on the cold ground, my hand held tightly to her chest as she steadily breathes in and out.
Closing my eyes, if I plugged my ears, all I could hear was Aria’s voice. It was her soft voice that always brought me comfort in the moments that I couldn’t hear. I was terrified of the dark.
In the dark, I couldn’t see…hear…
The buds of her earphones flop onto the floor and when I place an earphone in my ear, my voice plays along with my guitar. I stare at Aria, my heart sinking.
Clutching her hand tight, I press a small kiss against her skin, clutching my eyes shut.
In the dark, when I couldn’t hear, I wouldn’t be able to see either. Being suspended in that blank moment of time, being so vulnerable and open….
I grunt, Aria’s cold hand in mine. Aria would never be able to fully take away my fear of the dark, but lying here, right now with Aria’s hand in mine, I feel enough peace to slowly drift to sleep.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
If you forget the way to go
And lose where you came from
If no one is standing beside you
Be still and know I am.
Be still and know
That I'm with you.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
A/N- Hey everyone :) i apologize for any heartache out there but i know where i am taking this :) thank you for all your support and love, you guys are my inspiration to continue this story. The song is 'Be Still' by The Fray, i love this song and the meaning seemed to fit this chapter well so....tada!
i got twenty votes which is great but i got 8 comments, only two away from ten but i decided to just update :) As of today (6/8/13) Finding Aria is #63 in chicklit and #450 on romance so thank you guys so much.
i haven't done this for a while but please tell other wattpad readers/ friends about this story if you want, it would mean the world to me.
Just becuase this is already a long A/N, if anyone can make a FA banner or trailer, message me them, i would love to see fan art.
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