Lauren's POV
"Oh, my god.." I breathed. "I think I might die of embarrassment in 3..2..-"
"Babe! That's nothing to be ashamed of..really!" Camila tried convincing me for the umpteenth time this evening.
"Yeah, you don't sound so sure." I called her out.
"I am, though!" she argued and my whole family laughed at her comment.
"Right.." I quipped unconvinced.
"Lauren, don't worry. Camila would've seen this anyway, it's not like you'd be able to hide this from her with me around." My dad winked.
"It's not like you're around anyway.." I mumbled but thankfully quiet enough. Only Camila was able to hear this. She comforted me by putting her hand on mine and squeezing it lightly, letting me know she was there for me. I locked eyes with her and smiled gratefully.
"As sorry as I feel for you, Laur, I'm still ecstatic about the fact that I got to see you like this." she smiled cutely.
"Well, no one, absolutely no one," I emphasized, "needs to see this." I gestured to the TV.
"Including you!" I added directly at Camila and pointed my index finger at her which she jokingly tried to bite off a second later. I quickly moved it back, so that it was out of her reach.
"Cutee," I heard Taylor whisper to herself. I casted a glance at her and she smiled.
"You mean, no one needs to see, hm, let's think-oh! A 4-yeard-old Lauren running around with her mom's bra literally shouting she wants boobs already?" Clara spoke up.
We all burst out laughing remembering the part she's just described.
"Shush, please!" I begged.
"I liked more the one when on Christmas morning she mistook the boxes and she took one that belonged to our aunt who was single and little Lo took out a dildo and-"
"Ok, Taylor, stop right there!" I stopped her. "That's enough, okay?" I asked pleadingly.
My parents chuckled and nodded.
"Okay, okay. Next time we'll torture Taylor. Too bad it's so late already, we could have watched the videos with her as well." he explained.
"Nah, it's too soon for Camila, she's just met me, she's not ready for that." Taylor replied.
"Baby videos are so important," Camila joined in.
"Speak for yourself. We'll see what's your opinion on them when I get to see videos with a 5-year-old Camila." I argued. "I can't wait to see it, by the way." I winked.
"You get to see my sister who's 5 and literally the same person, that's enough."
"No, it's not fair." I continued.
"She's right, now you need to show her some of your videos." Taylor said to the brown-eyed girl.
"I thought you had my back!" Camila gasped.
We all chuckled and suddenly the girl got up.
"I'm sorry guys, but I should get going now, I told my mom I'd be home for the night." She excused herself.
"That's okay, thank you for joining us. It was a pleasure to meet you." my dad responded.
"The same goes to you, sir." Camila answered politely.
"Please, call me Mike." He added.
"Okay," she chuckled and came up to him to shake his hand.
I stood up and got closer to the girl. I planned on going out, because I could bear spending time with my dad when Camila was around, but being with him alone was torture. Which is why I wanted to go out and wait until I was sure he was asleep, so he wouldn't bother me.
She bid my mom and Taylor goodbye, who she hugged and looked at me expectantly.
"I'll see you tom-" she started.
"I'll come with you," I let her know.
"Alright," she smiled happily. I smiled back and we started walking to the front door. I heard footsteps behind us though, so I turned my head to see who they belonged to.
"Lauren, wait," I heard my mom say before I got the chance to spot her a few feet away from us.
"What's up?" I asked.
"Do you plan on sleeping at the Cabello's place tonight?"
I looked behind me where Camila was putting her shoes on, unaware of the conversation I was having.
"I don't know, I want to." I replied.
"Don't you think it'd be better if you stayed? You don't get to see your father and sister often and I'm sure they miss you-"
"Well, I surely don't miss him." I cut her off harshly.
"Don't say such things. He's your father."
"He doesn't feel like one. I dread every time I have to call him my dad, that's how much I hate him."
"Lauren Michelle, how dare you?!" she shouted.
"I'm leaving." I countered.
"What about Taylor?" she asked defeated.
"By all means, she can come with me, but as long as he's around, I'm not staying."
She looked at me, hurt and close to tears, then left the hallway. Now it was just the girl and I. I sighed deeply and finally looked up. She was watching me intently, confusion and worry written all over her face.
"Are you o-"
"Let's go," I cut her off yet again.
"Mhm," she nodded.
We left silently and got in her car.
"I'm sorry," I apologized as soon as we settled inside the vehicle.
"Okay," she said quietly. "Do you want to talk about it? Can I help you, Lauren?"
"Can we go somewhere else first?" I only answered, deciding I'd finally tell her about the problem I have with my father.
She raised her eyebrows and nodded eagerly. Was she that excited to find out about it?
"Is my place okay? My mom is asleep anyway." she suggested.
"Sure," I responded.
And so we drove back to her house through the empty streets of Miami as we listened to the songs on the radio. I noticed Camila glancing at me from time to time, checking up on me.
I was on the verge of tears by the time she parked the car, though I didn't even realizing I felt like crying.
"Oh, Lauren," Camila spoke up and quickly got out. She ran to the door of the passenger seat and opened it. A sob escaped my lips and this made me break down fully. I fell in Camila's opened arms and clutched onto her for dear life. I ended up in her lap as she was kneeling on the cold ground.
She kept whispering she was there for me and playing with my hair, rubbing my back a few times. She knew exactly what calmed me down and it worked. After I let all of the bottled emotions out and the sobs quieted down, I lifted my head which was buried in her neck. I looked at her shirt which was stained with my tears.
I looked her in the eyes and she put her palms to my cheeks. She stroked them with her thumbs and got rid of the remnants of the tears and kissed my nose.
"Should we get in?"
I nodded to her suggestion and got up. I offered her hand to take and she did exactly that. I leaned on it as I was standing up. We walked to her room in silence and I took a seat on her messy bed. I grabbed a stuffed animal which was new in the room.
I lifted it up and raised my eyebrows questioningly, not trusting my voice enough to voice my question.
"That's Ifos, it's a present from Sofi." Camila who had been watching me the whole time answered. She came up and took a seat next to me. "How are you feeling?"
"Exhausted," I replied.
"Do you want to go to sleep? Or we could just cuddle, we don't have to talk." She listed quickly.
"No, I want to tell you about him. But I won't say 'no' to cuddling." I answered while I was in the process of lying down.
"Unless I'll get to hold you," Camila added.
I smiled and agreed on what she said. We did what we've already repeated millions of times on all kinds of occasions. Putting my head on her chest, I linked our legs and she put her arms around my body securely.
"I caught him with another guy in bed two years ago." I revealed, wanting to get this off my chest.
"O-oh.."
"I know, shocker, right?"
"Yeah..What happened later?"
"Well, he covered his junk with a fucking pillow and walked me out of his and my mom's bedroom." I started. "He went to the bathroom and came out fully clothed again. I was stunned, I didn't say anything for at least 30 minutes. He suggested going for a walk and I obeyed, not being able to say anything else. He didn't even try explaining himself, Camila. Can you imagine that?" I asked starting to shake at the thought of the day itself. She got as close to me as possible and stroked my hair.
"Then he said what the guy's name was, and then, I started yelling at him. All kinds of things, really. Like, that I didn't care about this guy nor his fucking name, what he was thinking, or if Mom knew, if he was going to tell her and all that. He fucking asked me not tell anyone. How even-" I squeezed Camila's soft t-shirt in my hand as I tried to control the growing anger.
"Remember you're not obligated to tell me more, Lauren." she reminded me. I nodded and decided on continuing after taking one deep breath.
"So, he asked me to keep it from Mom, especially. Taylor still doesn't know." I started.
"Does your mom know?" Camila asked.
"Yes, I made him tell her." I replied.
"And...I'm sorry if this sounds bad, but.. she stayed with him regardless of all of this?"
"That's my question exactly! You've no idea how many times I begged her to leave him." I almost shouted. "But she has a good reason enough for me to stop bothering her. I mean, I'm not saying I'd do what she did, but I respect her decision."
"May I know the reason?" Camila questioned timidly.
"She said my dad reminds me of Chris the most and except me who's very similar to him, she has nothing left of him, and so she kept him. I'm not even sure if she forgave him. She stayed with him because of that. But he left with Taylor anyway, so it's not like they spend a lot of time together."
"Yeah, do they visit often?"
"Taylor visits much more often than him. He keeps saying he's busy with work, but I'm sure he just feels unwanted here, so he sends my sister by herself. But it's still not very often, like every second month or something."
"Do you at least know why he..cheated on your mom?"
"No, and to be honest, I don't even care about that anymore, I don't care about him. And guess what! He's trying to repay for what he did by giving us money, lots of money. I don't accept any of it, but since Mom lost her job a year ago, she gladly takes the money I don't want. " I explained.
"I see.." the brunette added quietly.
"Thank you being there for me, I didn't know how much I needed to cry it all out and then ramble about that dickhead." I confessed and I could feel the girl flinch and the name I used to describe my dad.
"Always, Lauren." the girl squeezed my body. "Absolutely always." She added and I kissed her cheek. "Though I don't feel like I helped you tonight, I didn't say much. And that's because I'm genuinely stunned," she tried explaining.
"Camz, don't worry about that. You help just by listening and being here." I assured her.
"Good," she smiled, kissing my temple affectionately. Butterflies exploded in my stomach and I couldn't stop the face-eating grin spreading on my face. I squeezed her waist, letting her know one again how much I appreciate everything she does.
"I'm hungry," she admitted.
"When are you not hungry, cutie?" I chuckled. "Let's go downstairs, let me prepare something for you." I suggested.
"Okay," she got up excitedly. "You always prepare the best snacks."
"They're nothing special." I argued.
"Exactly, yet you still somehow make them look and taste delicious. It's magic," the brunette explained.
"Obviously," I answered nonchalantly, smiling smugly.
~
"Toasts at midnight are the best toasts," Camila spoke up with her mouth full.
"I'd hope so," I replied as I looked up at the few stars on the sky.
The night wasn't chilly at all and the both of us were up for spending some time in the Cabellos garden, so we went outside. the surroundings were anything but disturbing, it was quiet and peaceful. There wasn't possibly one thing that could ruin the moment we were sharing.
The feelings remaining for the girl who sat by my side kept growing stronger with each day passing. I accepted the fact that I was not only attracted to her, but also..falling for her. Deeply and madly.
It bothered me at the beginning, but I've grown to tolerate it. I was scared it'd ruin our friendship, and I wouldn't survive it, but things stayed the same, or got even better which seemed impossible at times.
I tried thinking of some ways that'd make the feelings stop increasing so fast, and the only one I came up with, was staying away from Camila, and there's no way I'd agree to this. To be honest, stopping the feelings isn't exactly the best idea in my eyes. Deep down, I 'm secretly and silently hoping for something more to happen between us. Maybe, one day, Camila will start feeling something towards me as well, and that'll be the day I'll cherish until the day of my end.
"What's going on in that little head of yours, babe?" the girl I adore asked quietly, getting me out of my daze.
Butterflies were evident once again and the nickname didn't fail to make me smile.
"Just thinking," I replied skeptically.
"Care to share?" she trailed.
"Maybe one day," I dismissed answering not wanting to reveal the truth. It could crush her, or ruin our friendship.
"Okay, I cannot wait." She smiled.
And that's one of the many things I admire about her, she's able to be caring, make sure I'm okay by asking questions, but still be tolerant about the boundaries. She knows exactly where the limits end and how far she can cross the line. She's not intrusive, nor pushy. I never feel the pressure of telling her anything, because she simply doesn't expect me to. Though I still know I can always count on her. And in my eyes, that's definitely something to admire.
A yawn escaped her mouth and I giggled. She scrunched up her nose and closed her eyes while she fought with the yawn and fatigue.
So adorable.
"Do you want to go to sleep?" I hinted.
"Mhmm," she mumbled and cuddled up to my side when I'd come up to her. "Oh, thank you for the toasts, they were delicious. Like always!"
I let out an airy laugh, "You're welcome,"
"Actually, Laur?" she started shyly.
"Hm?" I hummed in response.
"Can we stay here? As in..fall asleep here?" the chocolate-eyed girl finally let out.
"Uh, sure, cutie." I laughed breathlessly.
"Aren't you gonna question it?" she raised her eyebrow in surprise.
"It's you, Camee, how can I question you? You're crazy like that, and I love it." I confessed.
"You're amazing," she breathed clinging to my body. "No one would ever agree to this if I suggested it, especially so suddenly. Yet here you are,"
"Well, the rest simply doesn't know what they're missing on." I trailed thoughtfully.
"What got you in such a thoughtful mood, missy, I don't know..but I sort of like it." Camila spoke up.
"I don't think you have any other choice since you're stuck with me for tonight, you just gotta bear with me." I chuckled.
"It would be my pleasure, baby." she responded charmingly.
Ugh, she can't keep on doing that.
Ever since she started becoming more confident, she also became more flirtatious and charming. My guess is, it's not for real. With that, she only makes me fall harder for her; the feelings grow stronger. And I'm not sure if I'm ready for another heartbreak just yet. I'm only recovering from one right now.
I can only hope for feelings to ignite in Camila's heart one day. Soon.
"Let's get some blankets and pillows, huh?" she nudged my side with her elbow, gaining my attention. I nodded my head once and we head to her room.
A moment later, we found ourselves sprawled on the slightly wet grass with a bunch of things that'd keep us warm throughout the night. We were literally lying under the stars, and it felt marvelous.
"It's perfect," I whispered.
"I agree," Camila trailed, snuggling up to my side. "Do you know any constellations?"
"Oh, I know lots of them. Chris and I used to watch the sky every night and our grandpa taught us many things about the Universe." I revealed.
"Really? Was your granddad just interested in it or..?" she asked curiously.
"Actually, he used to study astronomy in one of the best universities. Though he never got to do it for a living."
"That's a pity, why?"
"Yeah. Uhm, well, my grandparents had a farm, a huge one. My grandma inherited it after her parents and she wouldn't give it up. And my grandpa, deeply in love with her, wouldn't trade anything for her, so he stayed. He gave up his dreams of becoming a famous astronomer and stayed at the farm with the woman of his life." I told her.
"Was he happy?" she only asked.
"Yes, he was the happiest man I've ever met." I answered as my throat tightened at the thought of him. I miss him so dearly.
My body started shaking and that's what's got the girl's in my arms attention.
"Laur, I'm so sorry." She apologized and she buried her face in my neck, her lips lightly grazing the skin there. I only nodded not being able to formulate any words. I tightened my grip on her and she kissed my cheek. "You know, in Lion King they said that, quote, the great kings of the past look down on them from the stars. And I'm absolutely positive, that your grandpa, and Chris got the brightest stars."
That was all I needed for a meltdown to take control over me. And so I sobbed and cried for what felt like hours, with Camila comforting me the whole time, never giving me less attention than she ever would have.
With my throat sore and eyes puffy, I exhaled and inhaled deeply. I looked up at the sky, and one particularly bright star caught my eye. It shimmered as if it was the queen of the Universe, as if it owned everything. And I smiled.
I smiled happily, contended with where and who I was with.
I glanced down at Camila, who immediately put her hand to my cheek and stroked it delicately.
"You're my star," she whispered looking straight into my eyes, and put her head on my shoulder straight after.
The blood pumped in my head and my heart beat against my chest, for sure hard enough for the girl in my arms to feel it.
"And you're my treasure." I whispered a moment later, thinking she was already asleep, but I swear I saw the corner of her lips curve upward.
I smiled myself and fell asleep under the stars with someone who meant much more than just a friend to me.
a/n (:(
going through some tough slash happy times, that'd explain the rollercoaster of happy and sad moments in this chapter.
feedback is appreciated, you guys. hope you're all good.
stay positive x pola