•[Not Edited]•
Harry's POV
1 month later
I got the plan. This is how I'm going to talk to Zayn, how I'm finally going to face him without any anxiety and nervousness.
I took a deep breath and knocked on his door. I waited about two minutes before someone finally opened the door.
"Harry?"
I slightly frowned.
"I know why you're here but unfortunately Zayn isn't here right now.. He's off traveling again, he said he needed some time alone and well.. As you can see, he isn't back yet." Doniya gave me a slight pitied smile. I looked away and sighed softly, maybe this was a bad idea after all.
"Do you know when he'll be back?.."
"He hasn't texted or called anyone, he'll probably be back next well but for all we know he might come back next month." Hearing that kept pulling at my hearts broken pieces. I tried getting better, my mom even tried helping me by staying as long as she could and taking me places but it just wasn't the same.
"Should I just give up Doniya? I mean, if he wanted to talk or even visit me he would've.. But he didn't." I was starting to feel the anger I should've felt ever since the call.
"No, no, absolutely not-"
"No? Everyone keeps saying no yet everything that's happening says otherwise! Zayn isn't here, he doesn't come to talk to me or see me, when I try he's never around or I chicken out. The world has turned against us and maybe I should stop trying and..." I cut off, was I really going to do it? Say it? I would hurt a lot more but it seemed to be the only choice. "Let him go.." I sighed. I shook my head and looked back at Doniya.
"Harry..."
"Don't. Just.. Forget it. Tell him, when he gets back, tell him that I came and that I want him to know that I had to let him go, I can't do this anymore. I tried, did he? I never saw him trying and honestly I'm tired, I'm really tired of love. I will never find it and I'm done hurting, I don't want to hurt anymore. I need sleep, I need to eat and hanging on to him won't let me because he's not even here. I'm not happy and I need to be so... This is it. Tell him that.. I cared." I finished using his last sentence from the call and left. I felt bad, terrible, empty even, but it had to be done. It was either live a lie or live with the reality that this was it and it that's all I was gonna get.
Goodbye Zayn.
***
"You let me go?"
I bit my lip nervously not knowing how to answer him. I indeed left him but not this Zayn, at least I had him.
"Not you, him. I would never let you go." I hugged him tightly.
"Letting him go is like letting me go Harry," he hugged back. "You can't give up, not like that anyway. Be brave and say it to my face. Say you don't want me, that you don't want to see me again." He pulled away and made me make eye contact with him. "Say it to his face. My face."
"I-I can't... Not really anyways.." I moved away and turned my back to him. I knew he was right, if I really had to give up on him I'd have to say it to his face but I couldn't.
"Yet you're letting him go. And why? Because he needs time to think? Let him think Harry, what if he's coming up with something great. You're letting something amazing go."
"I'm letting someone amazing and perfect go.." I whispered but he still heard since he wrapped his strong arms around my waist.
"Harry, it's not hard to call, text. Be the big person or the brave person since he's too chicken," he chuckled. "Ironically, it's me telling you what to do with well, myself. So do it, do you trust me?"
I turned around to face him and smiled. "Why wouldn't I trust you? You've stood by me like Liam has, I wouldn't all of a sudden not trust you." I kissed him, deeply. I missed Zayn, I missed his touch and kisses. I missed everything about him.
He didn't pull away until we both needed some air. We just stared at each other, he gave me a light nod and kissed my forehead. I knew what he meant by that but it was up to me to take that big step, was I afraid? Yes, but I believe, I think, that it's totally worth it.
"And Harry?" He caressed my cheek softly.
"Mm?" I questioned, leaning into his touch.
"I love you."
I jerked awake by the sound of my moms voice calling my name or more like yelling.
"In my room mum!" I sat up and rubbed the rest of my sleep off. I guess today I wasn't gonna get much sleep, people have been disturbing it this whole week.
My mom slowly opened the door and gave me a loving smile, it warmed my heart every time. A mothers love is nothing compared to any other.
If you catch my drift.
"How are you feeling sweetheart?"
"I'm fine mum, how are you? How was work?"
"It was okay, I'm exhausted really but I want to make sure you're okay and that you ate."
"Mum I'm okay, promise." I gave her a small smile of reassurance.
"Harry? You know it's okay to feel pain."
"Mum are you..."
"Kind of but don't worry I'm okay, you'll be okay after a while and you'll live with the pain. I'm not saying you have to though, I don't want you to. Zayn might be somewhere you're not but it doesn't mean he's not thinking of you, you have to be optimistic and not give up someone you love. You understand me?"
I nodded slowly and sighed. That's two people now who tell me not to give up, actually three I think, counting Liam. I'll have to text him.
"I understand mum, thank you."
She nodded slowly and left my room quietly. I sighed softly, maybe Liam would know what to say to me so I can have better direction. After all, Niall probably knows when Zayn will be back.
To Liam: Question.
To Harry: Answer.
To Liam: Stop :( I'm serious here.
To Harry: Alright mate, go right ahead then!
To Liam: So I had a dream about him kind of and something (or someone) told me not to give up on him and to wait it out until he came back from wherever he's at and say it to his face. Either tell him I give up on him or not. Then my mom came in my room and just straight out told me not to give up on love like she did with.. My biological dad. What do I do??
To Harry: You know what Harry? Follow your heart. Do what you think is right. The only person who can really stop you.. Is you. If you want to tell him you gave up, tell him. If not and you're trying to get him back.. GO GET YOUR MAN! Harry, you honestly only live once, if you don't do what you have to do, what makes you happy, then what life are you living? You'd be living a damn lie tbh. Tell you what, I'll talk to Niall, ask him what's going on with Zayn, when I get an answer I'll let you know but you have to be ready Harry. You never know what's going on so you have to be strong. I'll have your back no matter what and if you decide to give up on him then I'll be there for you through it all and if you decide to keep him then I'll also be there, but I know what makes you happy Harry.. Try. Fight for that love, fight for him.
To Liam: Okay Liam, I know what you're saying.. I got this. Thank you mate. <3
I placed my phone on my drawer and laid back on my bed. Well now I have to think this through, I'm really doing this, I really am going to go back. I need to tell Doniya to not say anything to Zayn. I think I'm actually in love with Zayn, I might not know him in person like I do in my dream but I sure as heck know what I'm feeling and this strong feeling is devouring me inside. It fills me up and brings me up, it makes me want to do stuff I've never done before, I am going to fight for Zayn, whether he says yes or no.
I will win.
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A/n: Ta-ta! I got so into this chapter guys, I hope it was good! So now you know what happened, I'm mad at Zayn for this omg. 😂 He just freaking left and didn't say when he'd be back. Dumb move Malik. Hope you guys are happy with the update!
School again, hectic, AGAIN. I'm really tired and I CANNOT wait for Christmas break. I don't even know what we're doing for Christmas but I can't wait.
QOTC: How old are you guys?? (I'm 16 & if I Asked this question then woopsie).
Love you guys!!
~Angie💜