She still loved him.
She never stopped.
And she never could.
His reckless smile, and cold grey gaze that captivated and froze her feelings for him, but inside his coldness grew a small bomb that with passion and a burning desire could ignite the spark on his fuse making him explode into millions of beautiful pieces.
And Mia desperately wanted to be the fuel for his passion and desire but knew he was too guilty to ever get near her again.
"Nick." She said loud enough for him to hear her as he walked by the lockers that contained a large ocean of students.
"Yeah?" He asked turning back towards the 5'8 blonde.
"I, you look better than you did a week ago."
"I haven't fought, I actually got fired." Nick cocked his head and cracked an amused smile.
A smile that said he was planning something.
Mia knew this devious look of his all too well.
"Well I'm glad." She murmured shyly watching his eyes wander towards her scar, pulling it into her waist to hide it he looked down at the floor quickly.
"Nick, I hope you know that," She paused swallowing the saliva she had in her throat, "I hope you know that you can forgive yourself because I forgave you a long time ago."
"I can't, I hurt someone I," He looked back up, her blue eyes burning into his the eye contact weighing in deep on him, "I care about." He finished.
"You care about me?" She blushed, knowing Nick she knew he didn't really talk his feelings or show any kind of human emotion it took her by surprise and made him embarrassed to admit he actually cares for someone.
He nodded in response to her.
"Thank you." She said delicately, Mia embraced Nick quickly, people in the hall muttered among themselves because they knew the complicated history between Nick and Mia.
It annoyed Nick how everyone knew his business yet he was always a loner among himself, it annoyed him how he kept to himself, getting good grades and avoiding every fake person in his god forsaken highschool yet they all knew fragments of his story.
"Well I gotta go." Nick murmured, letting go of his body Mia nodded,
"I'll see you around." She said sweetly.
"Yeah." He said deadly, his attitude changing as he walked down the hall, the students making a path for him.
//
"Fired? Why?" Valerie said dramatically, almost knocking over the chessboard.
Nick chuckled, "Yeah, I asked for a raise and he said he could find another fucked up kid like me."
Flipping over the chessboard on purpose this time Nick sighed as the pieces hit the floor.
"That is bullshit." Valerie screamed jumping onto the white couch.
"Valerie get down or they'll tie you up again." Nick whispered harshly while he tugged down at her medical gown, dropping herself onto the couch she was now sitting on she gave a mere shrugged.
"So how is it in here anyways?" Nick asked looking around the room.
A bolted down TV playing an old black and white movie entertained mindless patients, while some other patients were being visited by their families.
"Boring, the only person who visits me is Grace but she's always face-timing her stupid French girlfriend and my mom doesn't come by because she's too busy fucking her tennis instructor while my dad is probably on a alcoholic binge."
"What about Wesley?"
"Ew what about the stupid jerk, he's probably with his ex girlfriend or something."
"You two broke up?"
"No." She smiled bending over to pick up the chess pieces she dropped.
"Valerie, I have to tell you something."
"Yeah?" She looked back up at him, putting the chess pieces on the couch.
"I'm leaving soon."
A nervous laugh escaped her mouth as she slowly shook her head, "No you're not, shut up."
"I'm serious."
"What why?" She questioned furrowing her brow and scrunching her nose up.
He stayed silent, not knowing whether to lie or not.
In the past month or two that he gotten to know her he liked her enough to consider her a friend, but didn't know if he should share his story with her.
The soft warm touch of her hand on his arm woke Nick up from his thoughts, Valerie offered him a small sympathetic smile, sighing he opened his mouth.
"I'm looking for my mom."
"Your mom?" She questioned,
"Yeah."
"Where is she?"
Nick shrugged, "I don't know, somewhere in Florida maybe."
"Why?"
"She left me and my dad when I was younger."
With no hesitation Valerie threw her arms around Nick's neck, squeezing him tightly in an embrace he wrapped his own arms around her body.
"I'm so sorry." She whispered in his ear, for some reason she began to sob.
Squeezing her tighter Nick didn't want to let go, he felt so safe with Valerie, she never judged him and she never talked down to him, slowly realizing how he was beginning to feel he let go of her.
She wiped her tears off with her palms and sniffled a bit, "I'm sorry Nick." She sniffled.
The urge to touch her again burned his hands and mind.
She was a raging body of flames that he wanted to melt the ice living inside of him.
"Don't leave, you're my only friend." She continued timidly,
"I have too." He snapped aggressively.
Taken back she threw a couch cushion at him, "I don't want you to leave you stupid idiot."
"Oh I'm an idiot?" Nick replied sarcastically,
"Yeah and, and, just fuck off!" She screamed standing up, quickly she rushed away and disappeared around a corner.
A nurse cleared her throat, giving Nick an annoyed look.
Smiling to himself, he realized that Valerie was his friend and he liked having her as a friend and that's why he had to abandon her before she abandoned him. His smile fell, standing up he navigated out of the mental hospital.
Running his hand through his flimsy hair he reached into his pocket for a cigarette.
"Each shortens your life." He murmured placing the cancerous stick into his parted lips.