Camila's POV
"Okay, mom. Slow down!" I heard a girl yell-whisper.
I stretched and turned left where I could see Lauren's silhouette sitting on the bed, holding her phone to her ear.
"What...are you serious?" she breathed. "God.. okay, I'll be home in less than 20 minutes." she said.
"Right, but please, don't freak out, I'll be right there and we'll figure it out." she calmed her mom down. "I love you, Mom... yeah, bye." She ended the call and sighed heavily.
"Ugh.." she groaned.
"What's wrong?" I made my presence known.
"Oh, you're up. Hi," she greeted and smiled.
"Hey," I smiled back and gestured for her to lay next to me.
"Only for a little bit, though. I have to go home." she explained regretfully.
"Alright..why?" I asked timidly.
"Um, my dad and Taylor are on their way." she answered skeptically.
Am I missing something? Who's Taylor?
"Okay.. who was Taylor again?" I finally asked. She chuckled lightly.
"My little sister,"
"Oh, is it that bad that they're coming?"
"Depends on how you'll look at it.. I'm excited to see my sister, because I miss her, but my mom is scared." she explained.
"Scared?" I questioned.
"Uh," she started. "During one of her episodes, the bad ones.." she trailed.
"Yeah?" I encouraged her.
"She almost hurt her really, really badly. She..she lost it, Camila. My dad had to take mom away from both of us. They wanted to put her in a hospital for people mentally ill. I didn't want to live with my dad, so I made my best to encourage her doctor, and dad, especially, to let her stay with me. Otherwise I'd have to leave Miami and move in with the two of them. But that was the last thing I wanted-" she was cut off by my abrupt question.
"And why's that?"
"Hmm?" she hummed.
"Why do you repulse him so much?" I asked bluntly.
"He's not as perfect as he seems to be.." she revealed timidly.
"But wh-"
"Camee, I really have to go. My mom needs me." Now she cut me off.
"Of course, I'm sorry." I apologized.
"No problem, cutie." she answered holding me tighter for a few seconds and then getting up. "I'll miss our morning cuddles, though." She said with a pout.
"I'm pretty sure we'll catch up soon." I assured the girl smiling.
"Maybe you could come over today..or better tomorrow, you'll meet my sister-"
"And your dad?" I stopped her again.
"If you insist.." she replied not so surely.
"Ok, I like the idea." I said as I got up as well. "Let me know when you want me to come, also how things are going with them."
"Alright," she nodded. "I'll go change now."
"Sure," I only added.
I prepared us quick breakfast, Lauren devoured it within a minute or two. When she gathered her things, I walked her to the door, we hugged goodbye and she was off
It was ten o'clock when she left and I went up to Sofi's room, to see if she's even there. Mom wasn't home, she probably went grocery shopping and she could have taken her there as well.
I opened the door quietly in case she was still sleeping (not really possible) and I peeked inside. My little sister was sitting with her back to her bed, facing the window which was in front of me. That meant she still didn't see nor hear me and I decided to make my presence known.
"Hi monkey,"
She jumped slightly but didn't say anything nor make a move to greet me, which seemed weird to me.
"Sof?" I questioned as I got a bit closer.
"What?" she mumbled.
"What's up?" I asked, now standing on her left. Now I finally saw what was wrong.
She was clutching onto her stuffed unicorn and she was.. crying?
"Sofi, what's happening? Are you hurt?" I asked alarmed.
She only shook her head no and wiped her nose with her right hand. I kneeled by her side and made sure not to make any abrupt moves that could scare her.
"Do you want a hug?" I suggested quietly.
She started moving to the right instantly, coming closer to me and snuggling up to my chest. I put my arms around her securely and rubbed her back.
Still clutching onto her stuffed animal, she started sobbing. Hearing that made my heart ache, but if she needed that, then I'd let her do it until she was ready to talk.
Maybe fifteen minutes later my little sister calmed down and I helped her wipe the still remaining tears off of her cute but now puffy and red face.
"Do you want to talk about it?" I quipped.
She furrowed her eyebrows and looked at the window again. A little bit later she nodded skeptically.
"I had a dream," she started.
"A nightmare?" I made sure.
She shook her head once again and I was quite shocked.
A dream," she corrected me.
"Ok,"
"About old life." She continued.
"Old life?" I asked.
"Yeah, Mila. Old life," she confirmed and looked me in the eyes. There was pure sadness lingering in them and I never hated being helpless as I did then. I wish I could have helped this little girl.
"Alright, was that a bad life? The old one." I decided to get the answers myself when I understood she wouldn't give them to me.
"Oh no, it was fantastic!" suddenly Sofia cheered up and smiled. Hearing a 5 year old say 'fantastic' was something itself, but seeing her real smile again was what made me feel a tiny bit better. I still wanted to know what caused her to cry, though.
"Yeah?" I played along. "Well, tell me all about it, boo!"
"Okay!" she clapped her hands. "So it was in our old house. It was Cinco Me Dayo-"
"Do you mean Cinco de Mayo?" I stifled my laughter.
"Yeah, that!" she ignored her mistake and kept going. "And grandma with grandpa visited us. Mommy made lots of food, and you ate all of it, Mila! You ate everything that was on the table." She giggled.
"No way.." I trailed jokingly.
"I'm serious, I'm not lying, Camila.." she said seriously.
"Okay, okay.. that's actually a lot like me, isn't it?"
"Yeah," she laughed. "And then Daddy.." her voice broke and she was forced to stop talking.
So that's what made her cry, I assumed.
"Go on, cutiepie." I distracted her.
"Okay.." she whispered and took a deep breath. "Daddy was there too, and he brought those hats, um.." she put her hand to her chin and thought really hard on what she was about to say, instantly forgetting about crying. "Sombreros! He brought sombreros for all of us and took us to the parade."
"That's great!" I added as my own throat tightened when I realized Sofi's dream was what actually happened. I didn't think it was possible for her to remember this, but I let my sister continue.
"It is! So we went to the parade and I never saw so many people in one place. Everyone was happy and singing. And everyone had sombreros or those huge dresses that I don't know the name of. But when you dance wearing it, the dress is everywhere."
"Everywhere, huh?" I said giggling at her description.
"Mhmm," she nodded. "And then you said you wish you could dance like that, and then Daddy bought two dresses. The big ones. One for you, and one for me. We were really happy." She finished.
"I don't doubt it, monkey."
"You never learned to dance like this, Mila." She stated.
"I thought you said it was only a dream?" I made sure.
"Oh, right." She chuckled.
Sofia actually dreamt of something that has happened when she was three years old. And she almost realized that.
"But I'll tell you a secret," I started.
"Yay! I love them." She squealed.
"I know," I giggled and pinched her cheek playfully. "You could have dreamt about this last night, but this happened, a while ago. Dad gave us those sombreros and I ate everything that mom and grandma prepared. Though I did leave some for the rest of you, don't worry." I revealed and stuck my tongue out.
"And we went to the parade?" she asked after laughing lightly at what I'd said.
"We did," I said with a smile.
"And.." she hesitated. "And was everyone happy? Like in my dream."
"Yeah, Sof. Everyone was really, really happy."
"Are we unhappy right now because Daddy is gone?"
I had to stop myself from gasping and letting out a sob.
"Are you unhappy, Sofi?"
"I don't know.." she thought. "No, I'm not unhappy. Sometimes I'm just sad, because Daddy is gone."
"I'll tell you two things-"
"Okay, first one?" she rushed me. I giggled and looked at the window.
"First one, Daddy isn't actually gone." I started explaining.
"But how? He's not around anymore." She furrowed her eyebrows.
"He's not physically here," I started but was stopped by this little impatient human being I called my sister again.
"What does that mean?"
"That his body isn't here. You can't really touch him anymore,"
"Or hug him," she added.
"Exactly, but it doesn't mean he's not with you. He's right here," I said as I caged her small hand between my two ones and guided it to her heart. I released her hand she spread it on her chest willingly.
"Here?" she knitted her eyebrows again.
"Mhm, he's in your memories." I nodded. "But he also watches you every day and every night. He falls asleep with you, he smiles at you when he sees you playing with Abby, he makes sure you're safe, he's always with you. You just don't realize that." I explained carefully.
"Can I talk to him?" she asked suddenly.
"Of course you can." I answered simply.
"Do you?"
"Yes, I used to do it pretty often, when I was sad most of the time."
"I hated it."
"What did you hate, cutiepie?" I asked puzzled.
"You being sad so much. It was awful." She replied.
"You're right, it was awful."
"But you're much better now, you seem happy most of the time." She confessed smiling.
"I do?" I whispered, scared my voice would betray me. I couldn't cry in front of her, when I was supposed to make her feel better.
"Yeah!" she agreed. "First, it was Lauren. it started to get better. And then Theo and Duardo came, that was even better. When they went home, you started to spend time with Lauren again. And it got even better." She explained simply. "You're smiling like the old Mila. You laugh like the old Mila. And you play with me a lot more, too!"
"That's probably the best part, isn't it?" I joked.
"No," she said shaking her head.
"No?" that actually surprised me.
"The best part about it is me not hearing you cry anymore. And I'm glad you don't sit in the bathroom for so long anymore and hurt yourself." She answered with ease.
"Sofi.." I breathed. I didn't realize she knew what was going on with me.
"Why did you do it?"
"Why did I cry?" I ignored the second part purposely.
"No, why did you make blood come out of you? I thought it only happened on accident. But what I saw, didn't really look like an accident to me." she explained.
When was I stupid enough to do it and didn't make sure I was alone?
I was stupid enough to do it whatsoever, no surprise someone saw me.
"You don't have to answer. That's probably one of those adult topics that I won't understand or can't know yet, right?" she added.
"Kind of.." I whispered as I put my shaking hands to my face and wiped some tears already threatening to fall down.
"Don't worry, I've got you." the little person said whilst climbing on my lap and hugging me tightly.
"I love you, Sofia."
"I love you, Karla." She imitated.
"Well aren't you in a funny mood?" I chuckled.
"I am," she stuck her tongue out at me.
"But seriously, Sof.. what I did was stupid. And besides you, only Lauren knows I did. And I want it to stay that way." I hinted. "Do you know what I mean?"
"You mean we're having a secret with Lauren?" she asked excitedly.
"Exactly. No one else can find out about it, ever."
"Okay, I promise you no one will find out." She held her pinky up. I linked our pinkies and kissed them after my sister did the same.
"I also want you to promise me to never do what I did. It's not good for you." I spoke up.
"Then why did you do it?" she asked confused.
"I thought it'd help me and I didn't realize how bad it was for me until I learnt to stop." I explained. "And also promise me that if you ever feel like doing it or start thinking about it, talk to me, or Mom..or any of your friends that you think will help you. Okay, baby girl?"
"Okay, I promise you I'll do exactly that." She said proudly.
"You're the best, thank you." I confessed.
"What for? I was crying and you made me feel better, thank you for hugging me." she excused herself.
"You helped me more than you realize, monkey." I said kissing her forehead. She hugged me tightly and her stuffed animal fell off my lap to the floor.
"Oh no, he fell!" The little girl exclaimed.
"He seems fine, he's not hurt." I said after picking it up rubbing its head caringly.
"Phew.." she breathed and took it from me.
She examined it and turned it around in her hands.
It's not very big. it's probably as tall as Sofia's two hands.
"Here," she spoke up shoving it in my face.
"What?"
"It's for you,"
"But it's your favorite stuffed-"
"I know, that's why I want you to have to. You're my favorite person in the world, you deserve it." She explained.
This girl knew exactly how to get to me, god. This time I couldn't stop the many tears streaming down my cheeks.
"Okay, don't take it if you don't want it. Just don't cry, please." Sofia begged immediately.
"Nooo!" I dragged chuckling. "Those are happy tears."
"Happy tears?"
"Yeaah, I'm just super glad you're my sister. And I'd love to take your stuffed unicorn." I said wiping the last bits of tears and accepted the toy. "Thank you,"
"You're welcome," she replied smiling.
"Does he have a name?"
"No, you can come up with one now." She suggested.
"Alright, let me think..." after a minute I spoke up again with an idea. "I'd like to call him Ifos."
"Ifos? I like it!"
"You do? Me too," I agreed.
"It reminds me of something, but I'm not exactly sure what..." she wondered.
I chuckled quietly.
How adorable could a person get? This one has no limits, obviously.
"We should get dressed, missy." I suggested.
"Okay, but Mila?"
"Yeah?" I asked raising my eyebrows.
"Can we spend the day together? I love that you have so much fun with Lauren, but I miss my Mila time, too." she said sounding regretfully.
"Of course, little one! Wear something comfortable then, it's gonna be a long day." I said suggestively.
"Yaaaay!!!" she squealed so loudly that I had to cover my ears.
"Okay, leave some energy for the rest of the day." I laughed.
"I have plenty of that!" she called while I walked back to my room to change as well.
During choosing some clothes, I was trying to come up with some plans for my sister and I. Playground and the pond with ducks were the only things until I remembered a certain someone I met the previous day.
And that's what we're gonna do today, see a movie at the theater where Dinah Jane works.
Yes, great plan.
a/n i might have shed a tear or two (or like a gazillion) while writing it ha ha
8 days was long enough break. there's a lot of dialogue, obviously. and i focused on the siblings, just because i miss my brother and i have a siblings appreciation day today.
me is back from the netherlands but me is also back to school, forced to catch up for the last week lol fml
it's short and kinda sucky, but i wanted to give you something, because i doubt i'll get anything out anytime soon :( hope y'all are good.
stay positive lovelies x pola