In the end, there was a guy whose job was going around with a huge dump truck collecting dead horses to incinerate them, I guess. It broke my heart to know that she was just getting tossed into a truck full of dead horses, but I made sure Liam and I were not at the house when he came and picked her up.
That was a week ago. It still hurts to think of her as being gone, and it feels like a part of me was gone. But we were moving forward.
I still couldn’t shake the memory of Liam crying—no, sobbing. It was the most heartbreaking thing….How many times had he just cried alone so no one could see? Girls weren’t like that. There was no shame in crying, especially in front of people. But guys didn’t have that luxury. It was like there was some unspoken code that guys never cried. It was unfair, and it pissed me off to think Liam thought that way, too.
Something changed between us that day. I guess we weren’t officially a couple, but I couldn’t shake the protectiveness I had begun to feel for him. I felt responsible for him, like I had to make sure no one ever hurt him.
It was so much easier, giving in to all my bottled up feelings for him. I didn’t shy away when he would sometimes unexpectedly hold my hand or smile at me in a way that I knew he wanted to kiss me.
We hadn’t kissed since prom, and my poor lips were beginning to ache in the absence of his. I knew all I had to do was say the word before I could feel his mouth again, but I was still a bit scared, I guess. It was still a little weird.
Lulu didn’t understand it; which was my fault, mostly. I couldn’t tell her everything anymore. It wasn’t that I didn’t trust her, but it was more I kept parts just for me to selfishly cherish.
“So, are you guys, like, dating now?” she asked me one day at school as we walked to our chemistry class.
I blushed. “No. Not really.”
“What does that even mean? Either you guys are dating or you aren’t.”
“We aren’t, then. And besides, what about you and Cameron? Are you guys dating?” I was desperate to get the subject off me.
Now it was Lulu’s turn to blush. “Yes! See? It’s not so hard to just say ‘yes’, Piper.”
I rolled my eyes, holding the door open for her. “Get over it.”
We took our seats, even though we were a bit early.
“And you never told me what happened at prom,” I pointed out.
“Neither did you,” she shot back.
“Okay, fair enough. I’m coming back to your house after…” I stopped. At Lulu’s house there was Kyle. I just wasn’t in the mood to “break up” with him today. I flashed a brilliant grin. “Nevermind. You’re coming to my house.”
Lulu rolled her eyes, reading exactly why I’d switched. “Fine. Whatever.”
As our teacher came in, I felt the need to whisper, “Are you mad at me?” Lulu and I had never really been angry with eachother before.
Lulu shook her head, pretending to be very interested in her chemistry notes. “No,” she answered in a sigh. “I’m not mad at you, Piper.”
But I wasn’t sure that I believed her. I think she was mad because she didn’t get to tell me about the rest of Friday night. If that was the case, it would be completely silly. And yet, I could still see the logic and suddenly felt very guilty.
“Sure you wouldn’t rather go down and jump your boyfriend instead?” Lulu commented after we got upstairs.
I rolled my eyes. “Lulu. He’s not my boyfriend.”
Lulu gave me this incredulous look that said she thought otherwise. She plopped on my bed. “Okay. So whatchya wanna talk about?”
I held out a finger, retrieving my messenger bag. “First thing’s first.” I pulled out a packet of Reeses Peanut Butter Cups—Lulu’s favorite, even if I hated it—some Chip’s Ahoy, and a Kit-Kat bar for me. “Snacks!”
Lulu grinned, sensing the direction of our conversation. “Oh, you cheeky girl!”
I plopped beside her on the bed, tearing into the cookies. “Yeah, yeah. Prom? You first.”
“Okay!” Lulu excitedly turned to face me. “Cameron kissed me!”
I had figured as much, of course, but I didn’t let it show. Instead I gasped like I was s’posed to and demanded, “Gimme details!”
Lulu’s entire face glowed and she just smiled to herself for a moment. Was that how I looked when I talked about Liam? “It was on the dance floor.”
“Wait!” I interrupted. “What song was playing?”
Lulu didn’t miss a beat. “’I’ll Be’.”
I nodded in approval. “Smart boy. Do go on.”
Lulu giggled. “I know! Anyway, he says to me that I look really beautiful tonight, and he apologizes.”
“What? For what?”
“That’s what I asked him. He says because he never asked me out before! And then he just leans down and kisses me!”
“Explain the kiss. Book description.”
Lulu didn’t even ponder over her answer. “Feather light. Sweet, but drove me crazy for more. It was like a first kiss kinda kiss.”
I’d had that with a certain country boy. “Okay. Go.”
“Then he just gives me this utterly sexy look.”
“Describe the look.”
Here, Lulu sighed, stuck. “I dunno how to explain it. It was beautiful, though.”
“Those are the best.”
“Right!”
“Anyway,” I encouraged.
“Anyway, he asks me if it would be alright if he could take me out after prom.”
“And you said yes.”
Lulu smiled for the world. “Of course I said yes! And then he kissed me again after he dropped me off at the house.”
“He walked you up to the porch, right?”
Lulu blushed. “But of course.”
“Good boy. I fully approve…..again.” Cameron had gotten my vote the second I saw him.
“Okay, now you.”
I wasn’t as excited to tell her about my prom experience, though. “It’s not as exciting as all that…” I felt tired just thinking about telling her about it. It felt like it happened decades ago.
Lulu snorted. “I highly doubt that. Everyone’s sayin’ you punched Tanya.”
I laughed. “I never punched her! I’m not promising it won’t happen, but I never touched her.”
“But anyway…”
I sighed. “Well, I was getting ready to leave—”
“You were gonna leave?” Lulu gasped.
I gave her a look. “I wasn’t exactly having the time of my life, but if you’re quite done…”
Lulu made a motion of zipping her lips and throwing away the key.
I nodded approvingly. “Anyway, that was when Liam showed up and pulled me on the dance floor.” I blushed, replaying the entire thing in my head. I guess now it seemed romantic. But at that moment it was aggravating. It was like watching a new movie. You don’t know where it’s going, so you can’t just relax and watch it. You have to analyze how you think it’s gonna play out. Now, though, it was like watching that movie again and realizing you liked it, after you could relax and enjoy it.
“And….” Lulu prompted.
I shook myself. “Well, he asked why we couldn’t try…and other stuff was said that I don’t really remember.” That was not true. I remembered everything that was said in great detail. “Then he gets real close, like he’s gonna kiss me. I tell him not to, but some jerk pushed me right into him and I accidentally kissed him. Then….we were…just….” I got lost in thought, remembering his touch…that passionate and yearning kiss. “….kissing….”
I mentally shook myself. “An then Tanya came and called me a whore in front everyone so I bolted and called my mommy.”
“And what about after I left your house? You were gonna tell him you loved him,” Lulu said after clearing her throat. She had the face of someone who had just watched a very romantic scene in a movie; completely absorbed in the screen.
Here, I got sad. I felt that familiar lump rise in my throat. I told her about how I found Molly, and how we walked her around for hours, and how the vet said she didn’t have long. I told her how Liam had stayed the night, and her brows raised when I told her I’d slept with him while he was shirtless. Then I told her that Molly left us the next day. I didn’t tell her how Liam had cried, though.
“Your horse died?” Lulu whispered. “Last week?”
I looked down at me hands, holding back the onslaught of tears. “Yeah….I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, I just didn’t really feel like bringing it up….”
“No, no! I completely understand! C’mere!” She wrapped her arms tightly around me.
I couldn’t quite catch the few tears that slipped away, but I was figuring out that it was okay to cry about it. I didn’t have to lock it all inside.
“Well….I’m a real mood breaker,” I sniffed, pulling back to wipe my eyes.
“You weren’t alone, were you?” Lulu asked, her eyes horrified.
I shook my head. “No. Liam was with me.”
Lulu sighed in relief. “That boy,” she said, leaning back against the wall. “is a mess.”
I grinned like a fool. “Yeah…but he’s my mess.”
I saw Lulu smirk triumphantly, but I was already off in my own Liam inflicted world.
A/N I know, I know. Not long. OMG, I can’t stop writing this story, though! It’s finally getting to where I’ve been itching to write, lol! I’m so happy! Everyone’s happy!!! Well, I mean, other than the fact of Molly being gone. But LIAM’S BACK!!!! And they’re unofficially together! You better thank “Shiver” for all these updates; it’s putting me in a very romantic mood. I wanna Sam, damnit! He is such a cutie! I can’t stop reading this book, though. It’s so awesome! Anyway, knowing me, there’ll be another update in Missed Me, but probably in nothing else for a little while. I’m sure y’all won’t be complaining, though.
VOTES?
COMMENTS?
TTFN,
Hannah
P.S Liam WILL be in the next chapter. Gotta make up for his long absence.