I woke to the sound of the back door being inched slowly open. Quietly. I listened intently, instantly locating the one heartbeat in the house. Jamie.
Julia had also gone to bed and Chris was in his room with music playing loudly with his earphones in. His hearing was not as sensitive as mine, because he was younger.
It seemed that Jamie was taking the opportunity to make an escape attempt. It didn't worry me. That was all it would be. An attempt.
It only took me a second to pull on my long coat over my silk pajamas, and a pair of boots. It took less than a second for me to run down the four floors worth of stairs and through the house. Then, I waited a moment to allow him to get about two meters away from the door before I appeared in front of him.
He let out an involuntary yell of surprise as he jumped backwards away from me, and I allowed myself a small grin before I made my expression cool and distant. He was shaking his head in denial, his eyes wide.
"You- you're in the sun!"
I glanced upwards, shielding my eyes with my hand, before making an amazed face; I hid my apprehension for talking to him well. "You're a genius!"
But he was too shocked to be affected by my sarcasm, "But you're a vampire; you can't go in the sun!"
"Of course I can."
"No! I've seen vampires in the sun before; they screamed in pain and held their heads in agony!" I sighed,
"they must have been young and weak, as the years have passed I have grown more and more tolerant, of course, it still hurts... but I deal with it." I could tell that I had deeply unsettled him. That had been one of the constant reassurances in his life, Sunlight meant safety. Now that was ruined for him nowhere was safe. "Anyway! you didn't really think I would let you get away that easily did you?"
His eyes narrowed. "No."
"Although I suppose I'm not surprised... or disappointed. If you didn't at least try to escape you would be so boring... you could have made a more interesting effort though. The back door? Way too obvious." Although now it made more sense, if he thought we couldn't follow him out into the sun, he would have hoped to make a clean getaway.
"You wanted me to escape?" now he looked sceptical.
"Of course not, but if you insist on trying, you could at least be creative. Although, I would strongly advise against trying again, if Julia caught you she would not be as lenient as me."
"Why do you care?" his voice was sharp and mocking,
I hesitated, before saying part of the truth; "I don't like to see people get hurt unnecessarily".
"You hurt enough of my friends before, that didn't seem to bother you too much."
"That was necessary, if you had left me alone, I never would have harmed them, you brought it on yourself. You should be grateful I didn't kill them."
"If we don't stop you, you will hurt other people."
"I wouldn't want to hurt other people, people like you force me to."
"That's a lie, your kind enjoy hurting people, killing people, I have seen them, laughing while they do it."
"You have had a very limited experience of vampires Jamie," he flinched, but I don't know if it was at my casual use of the word vampire, or his name, now he was shaking his head so I continued, "its true, you have only met young, rogue ones, you have seen my mind, you should know this." My voice left the careful, patient tone and turned bitter at the end. I hated that anyone; especially him, had been allowed to see my private thoughts and feelings. It felt intrusive; it made me feel exposed and almost vulnerable.
His eyes widened, I knew he sensed how I felt, which made me angry, nobody was allowed to know me that well. How could he? After I had only known him a few days?
I watched him, and I realized that now he was actually starting to see me as a person, even though it completely went against all of the views he had hammered into him, he realized I had thoughts, emotions. I could also tell that this scared him, a lot.
He changed the subject. His voice was more careful when he spoke next; although I could hear the burning curiosity, and revulsion in there.
"You said that I... that I died."
"It is a theory, nothing more."
"But you think it's true?"
"You actually want to know what I think?" I knew my voice was incredulous.
His eyes narrowed. "There aren't a lot of sources of information for this type of thing. I don't have much choice." I considered and decided to let it go.
"Well, it makes sense, the information adds up, there is no other way I could think of for you to be able to... fight me the way you did, usually people can't even tell I'm in their head, let alone do anything about it." My voice turned sour again at the end, an unreadable emotion flashed through his eyes. He hesitated before speaking again, his tone mirrored mine;
"So I'm a freak?"
"No, you are not a freak as you so nicely put it; I am not even a freak, which is just what you have been conditioned to believe by your friends."
"Do not mock them, they're good people."
"I'm sure they are, that's why I haven't killed them yet. They are just... misdirected."
"That is a lie, they have always been right!"
"About everything?"
"Yes!"
"What about me? Were they right about me?" for a second he looked unsure, "am I really a mindless, heartless monster?" he looked away, unwilling to answer, "see? You know you were wrong, you just don't want to admit it."
He met my eyes, angry again;"Ok fine! I admit that you are not mindless, or even heartless! You even sort of care about people in your own strange way. But you are a monster; I can't change my opinion on that, ok? I just can't!" he turned and stalked back into the house, slamming the door loudly after him.
I blinked, well, coming from him that was practically a proclamation of his undying love for my entire race. At least it was an improvement on his former opinion... maybe.
I wandered around the house aimlessly, Jamie had gone safely back to his room, and I ended up in the back corner of the library on my piano again after going back to my room to get properly dressed. I no longer felt like sleeping.
I let my fingers wander over the keys without paying much attention to what I played, it didn't matter, the sound soothed my nerves and I breathed out slowly, sighing.
A while later I paused, Jamie was leaving his room, I heard the door move quietly, but I went back to my playing, he was probably just going to get some food. Humans did that a lot. But then I stopped again; he was coming along this corridor, away from the kitchen, towards me. As I stopped playing he hesitated... he must be following the sound. There was no other reason for him to be coming this way.
I considered, I could leave now, before he got here... but he would think that was cowardly, even though it was just because I didn't feel like talking to him. He had a habit of irritating me, amusing me and interesting me all at the same time in every brief conversation we had. Although I don't think he realized that yet. I would stay and see what he wanted.
I resumed playing, and after a moment he came up behind me, stopping a couple of meters away. I ignored him and finished the melody before I turned around to face him; I raised an eyebrow.
"What?"
he was watching me with an odd expression, "You play?"
"Yes... I like music; I can play a lot of instruments." Clearly I was not living up to my monstrous reputation very well. He frowned.
"You play?" I echoed his question; he hesitated, reluctant to answer.
"I used to."
I remembered, a brief flash of one of his memories, I grinned: "Your mother taught you to play, you spent a lot of time with her" he flinched and glowered; apparently he didn't like me mentioning his parents. Understandable I suppose.
"Don't do that."
"What?"
"Use things you stole from my head, its wrong." I realized that he hated that I had seen his mind just as much as I hated that he had seen mine. Well, at least the feeling was mutual. I simply nodded.
"Ok, I'm sorry."
His eyes widened in disbelief "That's it? You're actually apologizing?"
"Yes, I apologize for bringing the subject up, but I don't apologize for getting them out of your mind in the first place, that was for your own good." This made him angry again.
"How was that for my own good? It would have been for my own good if you had never brought me here in the first place! Why did you? Are you going to let me go or are you going to kill me?" I sat in silence while he finished his rant and hesitated before answering, I had to admire the courage it took to demand to know your own fate.
"Firstly, it was for your own good because if I didn't do it, Julia would have, and lets just say she is not as... careful as I am." I gave him a moment to digest this before continuing, "I brought you here because I need information, and you were the easiest way to get it, and because I didn't know what else to do at the time." I added softly on the end "and I don't want to kill you." He stared at me; I knew he realized I hadn't actually said that I wouldn't.
"So do you actually have a plan, or are you planning to spend the next hundred years hiding here?"
My eyes narrowed slightly; "Yes actually, I do have a plan, but for your information I could quite easily spend the next hundred years here... that would be terribly boring though."
"So will you tell me the plan?" I considered
"I suppose it wouldn't do any harm; I am going to talk to them again."
"And that worked so well last time."
"ahh but this time I have you, I will make them listen."
"What if they don't?"
"They will, they care about you, yes?" I gave him one of my most dangerous grins; he shuddered and began shaking his head, "don't bother trying to deny it, I know what you mean to Sam. I've seen it in his eyes when he looked at you, he will listen." He swallowed.
I softened my tone slightly, feeling slightly sorry for him, "I don't want to hurt anyone, don't worry too much" I turned back round in my seat, facing away from him, feeling slightly awkward. I wasn't good at comforting people, I never really knew what to say. I allowed my reflection to fade away without really thinking about it, so that he couldn't see my face in the mirror.
He let out a gasp of surprise, which made me turn back to him in alarm.
"What?"
He pointed. "Your reflection just... vanished."
"Oh yes it does that," when he continued to look alarmed I took pity on him and explained, "its only visible when I think about it, if I get... distracted then it vanishes again." I shrugged "younger vampires usually don't have one at all, it takes time and practice to learn the control necessary to make it clear enough to see."
He didn't seem to know what to say to that until he blurted: "How old are you?"
I frowned before replying coolly; "Old enough."
He looked away for a second before hurriedly looking back; he disliked taking his eyes off of me for long, he didn't trust me not to hurt him. Smart boy.
I stood up and jumped down from the low platform the piano stood on. Jamie automatically stepped away from me and almost backed into Julia who had just appeared behind him, causing him to do a strange jump sideways to avoid both of us. I ignored him and focused on her, she had an excited grin on her face.
"So when do we leave?" I gave her an exasperated smile.
"I should have known you'd be listening; tonight, we leave tonight. Be ready." She did a mock salute, putting on an accent,
"Aye aye captain!" I nodded and she disappeared again.
I shook my head to myself, she was one of my oldest friends but I never had understood her eagerness to get into trouble. I liked action and adventure, but not trouble. Trouble just meant the few people I liked might get hurt, and then I would be alone. Not a nice thought.
I could hear her telling Chris in one of the sitting rooms, and then the sounds of them both getting ready to go. Jamie was watching me warily from a distance away, with a curious look in his eyes.
They quickly went blank again when I faced him; I nodded in his direction before returning to my bedroom to gather the small amount of things I needed to take with me.
I put all of my things into the various pockets of one of my long coats with fewer tears and holes. I often added extra pockets inside so I could hide things in there. I slipped my knife into the waistband of my jeans from under my pillow where I usually kept it. It made me feel safer, (even if I was unlikely to need it) along with my keys and the keys from a Ferrari I had in the garage building downstairs, it was one of my faster cars and I wanted to get back quickly.
I also removed the small, delicate, intricately carved white gold cross, attached to a thin chain that I always kept in the pocket of whatever I wore. I wasn't especially religious, even though at the time when I was brought up, religion was one of the most important factors in people's lives; I did believe that there was probably some sort of God, although I was highly doubtful he cared about me in the slightest. Or if he did it would probably be because I would be going to hell. I had broken most of the commandments and other things people weren't supposed to do by now. But no, the reason I cared about the necklace was because William gave it to me. A while after he died I also threaded my wedding ring onto the chain: it was safer there than my finger. Like the cross it was delicately carved white gold, also incorporating red and white stones into the design. Besides, I suppose I was no longer married to him anyway, if the lines "til death do us part" are true.
I hadn't known him long at the time when he gave me the cross, only a couple of months. But he gave the it to me for protection. It was widely believed that vampires feared the cross; they couldn't touch it. This was a complete myth of course, but people didn't know that. I could walk around in the middle of a vampire hunt without the slightest suspicion directed toward me. It saved me a lot of trouble.
I held it up and watched it sparkle in the faint light. On impulse I fastened the chain around my neck. I hadn't worn it in a long time; it made me feel safe, even if there was no real reason why anymore.
*
I went downstairs to find Jamie sitting in the kitchen staring out the window. He eyed me nervously when I came in the room but I ignored him.
In the fridge there was only three blood bags left. One each. I would have to get some more at the nearest opportunity. I pulled my bag out and hunted for a glass in the cupboard. I deliberately didn't look at Jamie while I downed the entire glass in one, and then slowly licked a small drop of blood from my lips. I ran my teeth over my fangs as they retracted back up, and blinked to return my eyes to their normal colour. Only then did I glance at him.
He was still looking out the window, although now he looked slightly green.
I grinned, "It could be worse" this made him look at me.
"How?"
"I could be eating you." he just stared at me in silence. "You look faintly revolted." I laughed to myself, which earned me another glare.
I shrugged and washed my glass out at the sink before turning back to him,
"What are you looking at?"
"Nothing. Outside." I looked out the window,
"It's a nice day, very... frosty looking." A harsh laugh escaped his lips, I looked at him curiously
"You're talking to me about the weather now? I should write a book: topics to discuss with your evil kidnapper." I sniffed;
"I'm not evil."
"That's a matter of perspective."
"How so?"
"Well, to me, and most of the human race, you are evil... however you don't consider yourself evil." I shrugged slightly,
"We each have our separate opinions," I turned and said over my shoulder: "would you like to go outside?" To say he was surprised was an understatement.
"Why?"
The evil kidnapper jibe had ruffled me slightly."Don't want to take you back looking too pale now do we? I hear vitamin D is good for you... although probably not for me." I saw the way he looked out of the window. He hated staying inside too long, like me.
"Aren't you worried I might escape?"
"Not in the slightest" he chose to remain silent, I knew there was no possible way he could, even in the unlikely event that he managed to get away from me; he couldn't get over the fence without being impaled or electrocuted.
I went outside and sure enough a few seconds later he followed me; I knew he couldn't resist. I wondered if he would try to escape.
The cloud cover was quite thick but I slipped my sunglasses on anyway to save me having to squint. Drizzle fell lightly onto the frosty grounds.
I let him lead, and he wandered off towards the lake through the trees, I easily slipped through the undergrowth without having to pay attention to where I placed my feet. Jamie had to be slightly more careful, cautiously stepping over logs and brambles to prevent himself from falling, allowing me to overtake him. I glanced back at him
"See? It is a nice day!"
"This is the complete opposite of a nice day; it's wet, and freezing!"
"True but from my perspective it is a nice day... I don't get cold, and more cloud cover equals less sunlight, so good all around." He just grunted.
It was surprising how normal a conversation I could have with him, he seemed to have gotten slightly used to talking to me, although I suppose that was inevitable with the amount of time I had spent with him... but it was clear that however long he had spent with me, he still hated and feared me, sadly, I didn't expect that to ever change.
We arrived in a small clearing. A huge tree stood in the centre, the massive branches that reached out on all sides kept the surrounding area free from any undergrowth apart from some fairly short grass, which was able to grow in the sparse light.
Jamie paused to see why I had suddenly stopped,
"That's a big tree."
"It's the oldest and largest in the grounds... I should know; I planted it." I heard his fast intake of breath but I didn't turn back to see his expression. I really should pay attention to my words more.
I walked over to the thick trunk and gently laid a hand on the rough bark. This was William's favourite tree. He would spent hours sitting around in the branches, usually with me; there was plenty of room. The thick canopy filtered the sunlight to the extent that it didn't bother us. I remember, once he carved my name next to his. It was a terribly cliché thing to do, but it was very sweet of him all the same. I wondered if it was still there, but I resisted the impulse to check and turned away sharply. This was not the time.
Ignoring Jamie's curiosity at whatever expression had been on my face I continued on through the trees. After a moment I heard him following me.
I stopped when I reached the edge of the foliage. The trees stopped at the edge of the long meadow that sloped quite steeply down to the edge of the lake. The cold season meant that the ground was only covered by short, pale looking grasses, but I knew when the weather grew warmer, hundreds of wildflowers would grow creating a beautiful view.
However the harsh weather did give it a different kind of beauty. It looked wild and cold, the bare, claw like branches of the tree that grew at the lakeshore sparkled with frost, as did the raw ground and occasional bush. The thick white cloud cover gave the scene an almost lilac tinge.
I stopped to admire the scene, causing Jamie to jump back to avoid colliding with me. I thought maybe I should try to slow my actions down a bit, more like a human; it had not been long since I was at school surrounded by them but already I was getting out of practice; letting little things slip that show I am not quite normal.
A rabbit was down near the lake. The second it caught my scent it froze in terror, whiskers quivering, before bolting for its burrow. Most animals are naturally afraid of me. They recognize what I am much better than humans. Although, I do often get along with predatory animals, they recognize a fellow hunter and respect me.
I glanced at Jamie but his expression was unreadable as he took in the scene. I found myself wandering what he was thinking but as usual I was unable to get anything from him. Usually I have a general sense of how people are feeling even without consciously using my powers. This only made me find him more interesting.
I sat on one of the large gray rocks that stuck out of the ground a few meters from the tree line, content to admire the view. The rocks made it seem as if the ground had been ripped open with their rough surfaces flowing almost seamlessly into the hard earth. I trailed my fingers along it aimlessly, tracing random patterns in the stone. Tiny flecks shone slightly in the dim sunlight.
Jamie stopped a couple of meters away from me, eyeing me suspiciously but I remained silent.
He broke the silence first."You like it here."
It didn't sound like a question but I nodded anyway, he frowned, I could tell he was still trying to work me out, confirm the new doubts he was developing about me and others of my kind. Just by liking something it showed that I had feelings, emotions just like everybody else. I could also tell that he didn't like that. It contradicted too many of the beliefs hard wired into his brain. "But... how? Why?" his curiosity was getting the better of him again, forcing him to voice his thoughts out of frustration.
I shrugged again, and then smiled to myself, "do you want to know how and why I like this place or how and why I can like this place?" This caused him to frown again. When he remained silent I decided to answer the easiest question; "I like it here because it is peaceful... this is about as close to a real home as I have had in a very long time. Plus the landscape is beautiful... it has a raw quality which is often lost these days." The corner of my mouth twitched into a half smile "I like to be outside, in the open... it is much preferable to being trapped in small crowded modern buildings with little character." I stopped and frowned to myself slightly unsettled at the amount of honesty I had just used. It is not often I talk about myself that much.
He was watching me with another unreadable expression on his face; I looked away, focusing on a small rock on the ground, his close scrutiny causing an unexpected moment of shyness. I hadn't felt self-conscious in centuries, which made me all the more uncomfortable.
He took a step towards me, and then another, until he was directly in front of the rock that I was balanced on. I finally risked a glance upwards and met his eyes. They burned with an intensity I'd never seen and my breath caught before rapidly speeding up, as my body forgot that it no longer needed oxygen. The closeness took me by surprise.
I felt myself lean towards him, as though I had lost control of my movements and he leaned towards me until our faces were centimeters apart. One of his hands slowly reached up to cup the side of my face softly and I felt a shiver run through him as he laid the other on my upper arm. I inhaled his tantalisingly warm scent and I knew if it was possible my heart would be racing to match his. It would be so easy to close that insignificant gap between us...
My lips brushed his gently, and I felt his surprise, and for an instant he responded before his hands suddenly turned hard and angry as he roughly shoved me back.
I was too caught up in the moment to respond with my usual reflexes and regain my balance, so I fell backwards and landed heavily on more rocks a few feet below me, cracking my head hard.
He recovered quickly, only stumbling slightly before he turned and ran, whereas in my first attempt to get up and chase him my knees buckled as red dots swam in my vision, which was fading to blackness around the edges.