I remember my first day in the temple. Coming to stay with the other children who were further advanced than I, I started my training later than normal. I believe I was 7 or almost 8.
I didn't have a lot of friends then. I began to get picked on because of how I was a late bloomer in my connection, it bothered me at first but after a while I didn't care. It slowly stopped as the others grew up and realized I was more than capable of catching up to them.
That first day was the scariest moment of my life. I was terrified of this world being introduced to me. The force I thought was a myth until I felt it running through my veins.
There was only one person that settled my nerves that day. I was waiting for my first class with Master Windu, and I was lucky enough to sit next to the young boy, Anakin Skywalker. I remember him smiling at me.
"You're new?" He questioned. This question inadvertently caused others to ask and take notice that I was indeed new to training. "You don't look familiar?"
"Yes, I am." I told him, I was so embarrassed. "But just because I'm late doesn't mean I'm not just as capable as everyone else."
"I know, I'm 10 and I only started last year. There's nothing wrong with it." He told me. It calmed my nerves a little to know someone else had gone through that feeling of insecurity. "I'm sure one day you'll be a great Jedi."
As for life before that I only remember images. I've blocked out most of it all to focus on the future. A flash of my fathers face or my mothers hair. I wonder what staying in that good part of that life might have entailed. Maybe I wouldn't be lying here tonight awake from unsettling dreams.
My dreams had been increasingly stranger. Never have they been full stories, but images and feelings. No two have been exactly alike so I've always dismissed them. But every time the feelings that came with them stayed. For someone who always pushed away every feeling, this was tough to handle.
I stayed in bed that morning as long as I could. Knees to my chest watching the sun rise from the wide window to the right of my bed.
By now I am a true Padawan learner. I've been taught so much yet I always know there is always going to be more for myself to learn. After so many years, I've been building my Jedi reputation. Its very rare that a female or daughter is blessed with the Jedi gene. Or if she does for one to be strong enough with the Force to be able to train to use it.
For years, I was always looked at as fragile and weak. But after the last 7 years of being on nonstop missions, learning and being passed from Master to Master I feel as though I am no longer seen as "the weak girl."
Today is the day I reunite myself with Anakin Skywalker. The one labeled as the Chosen One. He's been off and on missions since less than a week after I met him. It will be weird to see him again, surely. It will be most awkward because I've thought of him every day for his kind words to me and I know I will need to reintroduce myself to him today.
Jar Jar Binks excruciating voice knocks at the door. Already I hate mornings, having to be woken up abruptly like this makes my head ache.
"(y/n)! Itsa time to get ready for the meeting with Senator and the other Jedi!" He yells as if the door is sounproof.
"Okay, I'll be there soon." I tell him to get him to go away. I stay put for another 10 or so minutes before brushing and braiding my hair back. Then I slip into my Jedi uniform, clipping my lightsaber to my belt and walk out to find the Senator.
"Good Morning, Miss Amidala." I say as I walk to the little coffee table in which we will discuss the Senators safety.
"Good Morning," she laughed, "how many times do I have to tell you, you've been a protector of mine nearly 3 months now you don't need to call me Miss Amidala." She laughs and I roll my eyes.
"I apologize, Padme. Its just a habit at this point." I tell her,
"It's alright." She puts a hand on my shoulder, "Are you nervous?" She asks, seeing my increasing nerves. And it's true, I am nervous. I'm nervous if Anakin remembers me, I'm nervous if he doesn't. I'm nervous if Master Kenobi doesn't believe I lived up to a reputation, or even what that reputation is. Padme knows my little secret too. Over the last 3 months together we've gotten pretty close.
"I suppose. I haven't seen the two in around 9 or 10 years." I sigh, "Besides, I also don't understand why they need to be here, I've been handling you just fine on my own." I tell her.
"I know you have, it wasn't my choice. The Chancellor believes that the threat has increased now." She says and I nod my head knowingly as the elevator door opens.
"Obi? Obi!!" Jar Jar's voice echoes through the hall. I stand up a bit straighter now, feigning confidence.
"Captain Typho, I'm head of security here." they bow back. I look at Anakin who barely gives me a glance. I let out a silent sigh, in that sigh I try to let go of my feelings of attraction. He's grown up so incredibly handsome. It really isn't helping my childish emotions.
"Obi-Wan, it's very good to see you." Padme shakes his hand.
"And you, Senator."
"And- Ani? Goodness, you've grown." You're tellin' me, Padme.
"So have you, milady." they shake hands and I swear I sense feelings toward her.
"Welcome. Oh, and this is-" Padme starts and pulls me forward.
"(Y/N). We know." Anakin stops her and hold out his hand to me. "It's good to see you again." He smiles.
"Y-You too." I swallow my feelings in my throat to smile back. And shake hands with Obi-Wan.
"It's an honor to meet you, Master Kenobi." I tell him.
"Also an honor." Obi-Wan smiles.
"I must say I found it surprising when the Chancellor told me that he was assigning more Jedi to the task. (Y/N) has been doing such an excellent job on her own to hold off the threat." She tells them as we walk to sit down on the couches.
"Thank you for your praises, Senator." I tell her formally, nervous still.
"I'm sure she has. (Y/N) has quite the impressive reputation. But I'm afraid the threat to your life has become much more serious as you must know from the last attack." Obi-Wan alludes to the last attack of shots being sent through the window. I had to jump on Padme and take some shots on my arms from her attacker before I was able to begin fighting and deflecting their shots with my light saber. I was barely able to hold them off. My defeat of whoever it was was a triumph.
"I suppose. I just wish I knew who it was that was trying to kill me." She sighs.
"I'm sure we will find out who it is." Anakin says, Obi-Wan throws him a glare.
"We will do everything we can to protect you." Master Kenobi corrects.
"Surely by protecting her we will find out who it is, that is what I meant." Anakin repeated.
"We will be doing what the Jedi council told us to do." He tells Anakin, Anakin rolls his eyes. I feel like chuckling but I know I can't, they argue about silly things nonetheless. "You will pay attention to my lead this time."
"Perhaps with three of us here the threat will be resolved much quicker." I assure them.
"We are happy you're here. The threat is much more serious than the Senator makes it seem." Captain Typho nods.
"If that is all I believe I will retire." Padme yawns. I hold my arm out to escort her to her room.
"You'll be okay." I assure her. Also to myself a little bit.