Twenty-Five
The second I lunge backwards, towards the door into the school, Jagger grabs my shoulder and yanks me back. I bump into his chest and he wraps his arms around me, more like caging me in than a backwards hug.
“We have to go, Sloane,” he whispers.
I can’t believe what he’s saying. We’re not even going to look for the child? We’re just going to leave him here to die from starvation or be eaten by zombies? Are we just going to continue on and forget about him, acting as if he never existed?
“He must have walked away from me in the cafeteria,” Jack says quietly, more to himself than the others. “I didn’t notice. How didn’t I notice?”
“None of us noticed,” Cole says, resting a hand on Jack’s shoulder. Jack brushes him off and shakes his head in disbelief.
“We need to go,” Jagger continues, his tone harsh this time. “We can’t go back, Sloane. It’s too dangerous. All of them are in the school now.”
I try to wrench out of his grasp and twist and turn until I’m facing him. He grips my wrist tightly as I try to pry his fingers one by one off of me, but he won’t let go.
“Let me go get him,” I snap, trying not to yell as much as I’d like to. “You all can go on without me, I don’t care! Just let me go!”
Jagger grabs my other wrist and yanks me roughly forward, almost into his chest. He looks down at me, his eyes glaring at me as his hands cut of circulation in my arms,
“It’s a suicide mission,” he hisses. “I’m not letting you kill yourself.”
“We need to go,” Cole says, plunking a hand down on Jagger’s shoulder. “Now.”
Jagger nods and turns towards the gate in the fence, the one we need to open to get through. Cole stands in front of it, waiting while Jack follows behind me. I move not by will, but as Jagger pulls me along. I dig my heels into the ground, do whatever I can to get back to the school, but it’s no use. Jagger has a death grip on me, literally – he believes that if he lets me go, I’ll die.
I have no choice but to leave the child.
Tears run down my cheeks as Cole starts to fiddle with the lock on the gate, trying to get it open. It takes longer than we thought, and eventually groans are coming from within the school. The zombies still don’t know we’re out here, but it won’t be long before they do.
“Can you pick it?” Jagger asks.
“Does it look like I have something to pick locks on me?” Cole snaps. He’s aggravated, which to me is a sign that we should panic. We can’t climb the fence; Bullet can’t get over and I’m not leaving him too.
“I can shoot it off,” Cole continues, “but that will alert them. We won’t have much of a head start.”
Jagger looks back towards the school and shifts his grip on my arm. “I don’t think we have another choice.”
“Get ready,” Cole says, aiming his gun. I move closer to Bullet, making sure he’s going to be okay to run with us, even though he always is. Jagger’s fingers twitch on my arm and he meets my eyes.
“Am I okay to let you go, Sloane?”
I shake my arm out of his grasp and nod, avoiding his gaze. “I’m fine.”
“Do it, Cole.”
The bullet echoes through our ears and creates a metallic sound once it hits the childproof key lock. It falls to the ground, easily broken, and Cole throws open the gate. He’s just rushing through it with Bullet matching his pace when a loud sound of breaking glass comes from behind us. Despite knowing what it is, we all look, just to see if we have a chance to get away at all.
The zombies are trying to climb over one another to get through the square of glass above the door handle. It’s enough to fit one of them through, but they’re all fighting, pushing against each other at the same time. When one screw untangles itself from the metal in the door, the others start to spin after each other, the door coming closer to breaking.
“Come on!” Cole shouts. I turn around and he’s gesturing for us to come, waiting for our group to run. The zombies will be on us at any moment, and we don’t have much of a chance to get away. Eventually we will tire, the adrenaline will turn into exhaust, and we’ll have to let them catch us.
“We have to take some of them out!” I call back. “We won’t be able to make it if we don’t!”
“No, we need to go now.” Cole sounds scared. “Get her, Jagger!” He takes off running without us. Bullet jumps back and forth, unsure of whether to follow Cole or stay with me.
He ends up stopping halfway in the field to turn around, looking at all of us like we’re crazy. And honestly, maybe we are. We need to get a head start to get away from these zombies, even though we don’t stand much of a chance, and here we are, standing still. Maybe we’re retarded.
“Sloane.”
I whip my head around to meet Jack’s gaze. My hair flies into my face and falls quickly away so I can see him clearly. He looks pale. And more strangely than that, he looks numb. Slowly, I reach my hand out, ready to grab him and pull him along. It’s like subconsciously I already know what’s happening – that my head is trying to get me to change the outcome before I even know what the outcome, or what I’m changing, is.
“You and Jagger go, I’ll hold them off.”
“What?” More glass shatters across the playground. “No, Jack, come on. We need to leave.” I don’t know why I’m telling him this. Not only do I know it’s pointless, but I also know that Jagger has been telling me the exact same thing.
I grab his hand, try to pull him along, but he just intertwines his fingers with mine. He holds my hand tightly, but I know he’s soon going to let go.
“I’ll distract them. You two need to go, get to Fort Saunders. You’ll be safe there. You might find your family, Sloane.”
My eyes grow wide. This is the most I’ve heard Jack speak since the church tower and now he’s telling me he’s staying behind and something about my family.
“Ask Jagger and Cole about me,” he continues. “They’ll have some stories to tell. About me, about your past. Just promise me you’ll get to safety. Promise me you’ll be safe.”
Alarm bells go off in my head as more sounds come from across the yard. We’re already rushing our words, but we’re still wasting so much time. I can’t leave Jack behind. I just can’t.
“Jack, no-“
“Sloane!” He’s shouting now, no longer like the sad, angry Jack from before. Even though I don’t remember him or know who he is, somehow, just somehow, he seems normal. “You need to go! I’ll be okay! Please, just leave!”
Using my hand which he’s still holding, he suddenly pulls me into him. I hit his chest roughly as he wraps his arms around me. He rests his head on top of mine, almost like he’s snuggling into me. He pulls back slightly, looks me in the eyes, and then does something that makes my heart stop – and not necessarily in a good way.
Jack kisses me.
It’s just a mashing of lips together before he quickly pulls away. Then, without another word, he shoves me out of the fenced-in playground.
I stumble into Jagger who catches me just as Jack slams the gate shut. The sound is metallic; ringing through my head like something that’s more important than it seems. Jagger, like me, is speechless as Jack makes sure I won’t be able to open it. He pulls out his gun, ready to defend himself for the short remaining parts of his life.
Or so I think.
Jagger wraps his arms around me, trying to pull me away. It’s like he knows what’s going to happen before my brain can process it, trying to get me away so I don’t have to see.
“Goodbye, Sloane,” Jack says.
Jagger yanks me away but my feet refuse to move. I’m being dragged just as the door bursts open and the zombies run through, finally free. Some of them are broken even more than before, having to fight their way through the others to get the door open and get out. It’s like they feel no pain or care about their own survival. All they want is us.
“Get her out of here, Jagger!” Jack screams. His voice is so hoarse sounding, so strong that it shakes me inside.
Jagger is pulling me away rougher than before, yelling in my ears for me to move, that we have to get to safety, but I can’t move my feet. They’re stuck. My whole body is frozen.
Jack is sacrificing himself.
As the zombies grab him, Jack doesn’t move.
Somehow, he stands still as they grab and tug him, sink their teeth into his flesh. He winces, but doesn’t cry out; doesn’t run. He doesn’t even shoot them. When he raises his gun, a scream leaves my lips. I can’t help it. It’s so loud; so throttling that Jagger tries to cover my mouth.
Jack lifts his pistol up and presses it roughly underneath his jaw. I can only imagine the cool metal on his skin, the burning of it being his last feeling. The zombies are in on him now, ripping chunks of his skin from him and spraying his blood everywhere. He still doesn’t move.
He grimaces and looks to the sky.
Jack pulls the trigger.
My scream turns horrifying as Jack’s body slumps to the ground and all the monsters cover him with themselves, tearing his body into pieces. Jagger pulls me away and I take one last look at Jack. All I can see sticking out from the hoard is his foot, the shoe scuffed and bloody yet it remains untouched.
Jack is dead.
Jagger takes my hand and together we take off running towards Cole. Bullet is waiting for us when we reach them and together, the four of us take off running. Tears are streaming down my cheeks and my feet are slipping in mud, but no matter how much I slip, Jagger doesn’t let go of my hand. He grips it tighter than before, making me run so hard and so fast that I can taste blood in my mouth. I think he knows I’m just about ready to give up, ready to stop and let them have me. Emily is a zombie, Jack just killed himself for our sake. What’s the point of running to safety if the people we knew, the people we loved, are dead?
My shoe slides in the mud and I collapse onto my knees, covering myself in the dirt. Jagger’s hand tears from mine and I realize I have no will to get up. Everything is finally sinking in, here, in the middle of the field. Everything is becoming real.
“What’s the point?” I ask out loud. I’m breathless.
Jagger takes my wrist and pulls me to my feet. I’m deadweight, not helping him in the least but somehow he manages to get me to my feet. When he does, he intertwines his fingers with mine. I keep the hand that Jack held clean.
Cole turns around to look at me as we break into a run yet again. His eyes are bloodshot but I can see the worry in them as he catches Jagger’s eye while we sprint.
“Don’t let her go,” he says to Jagger, as if I’m not right here. “If you do, she’s going to go back.”
I part my lips, ready to object, to fight with him, but I don’t find the words. Maybe he’s right. Maybe I would run back to Jack, to the toddler, to the zombies. Maybe I would just end everything as soon as Jagger let me go.
When we break the treeline at the end of the field I feel like I can’t breathe. I’m choking for air, unable to get enough into my lungs. We pause on the grass beside the pavement, through the trees and away from the field. I think we’re a safe distance away but I don’t care enough to check. I double over, placing my hands on my knees. Cole and Jagger do the same and my hand is still being held.
I feel like I might throw up. My chest, lungs and throat hurt so bad that I want to collapse on the ground and stop breathing all together. My throat is sore from the screaming and the running, but I’ve stopped crying. Somehow, everything feels surreal, like even though the weight of it all just hit me, I feel like I’m dreaming.
“The station is up ahead,” Cole pants. Bullet is tiring right along with him, but we all know that we can’t stay here for long. We have to get moving.
We start moving again, this time at a slower pace. Cole starts to jog but quickly stops, too exhausted to try anymore. We walk through empty streets and sidewalks, not seeing a single zombie. I don’t know if it’s pure luck or all of them migrating to where we crashed the Hummer. Can they really hear the noise from this far?
Everything seems out of focus. I think running so much and the trauma of what just happened are getting to me, willing me to collapse. I still might even have a concussion.
“Up ahead,” Cole gasps.
We all slow to a halt to stare the subway station up ahead. It’s a large, pale beige building in the distance with Central Transit Subway written above the rows of double doors entrance. Newspapers are blowing everywhere from a broken stand lying on the stones that make up the area of the front. They flap in the wind, creating the only sound.
“We’re here,” Jagger breathes. “We made it.”
But for what cost? We lost two of us, we lost our families, we lost our lives. Is going on the train to Fort Saunders really worth it? It was what Jack wanted us to do, so in some form I owe it to him. But somehow, even though I should be excited, relived – anything, I’m not. I’m dreading this. This feels like it’s the end, without really being the end.
“This is it.” Cole sounds the happiest I’ve ever seen him. “We’re safe.” After a few moments, he turns around to us, raises his arms in the air. “We’re safe!”
The three of us and Bullet walk towards the walls of the subway station.
We’re safe.