Josephine
The emotion of this day is indescribable.
We are doing so many things, at such a fast pace, that my enthusiasm is growing by the hour.
I can't wait to start shooting on set in earnest.
I have to admit that I still haven't fully recovered after the photoshoot we did this morning.
It was a whirlwind of emotions for various reasons but the best part came later, when I was getting ready to go out to lunch with the whole crew.
Hero and his erection.
It could be the beginning of an adult film.
I burst out laughing as I dry my hands.
My reflection in the mirror is of a genuinely amused girl.
Yes, the fact that Hero got excited while in the room with me, makes me smile. They were moments of panic and if I think about it, it makes me laugh even more.
I would have an avalanche of jokes to make to him just for the sake of annoying him, but I'm avoiding anything, since we are in the midst of an avalanche of people who seem to have eyes only for us.
By the way, Hero and I are sitting right next to each other, so we make it easier for everyone.
Luckily lunch is almost entirely a buffet and we don't have to constantly sit, in fact we are all moving around the room it seems.
I left for a moment to go to the bathroom, but now it's time to return to the table.
Our main orders are yet to arrive and there is a lot of chatter in the place.
We have practically occupied it all, given that there are so many of us. I think there are at least 50 people in here!
I introduced myself to everyone, I hope. I think it's important to establish a pleasant work environment and being kind to everyone is in my nature.
I don't like being rude and this also involves exchanging a word with anyone.
"Hey! Josephine!"
I turn towards a girl with short hair and funny glasses on her nose.
I recognize her immediately: the assistant costume designer from this morning.
She's much more relaxed now and I'm happy about it.
"Hey Annie!" I smile at her and hug her briefly, as if we've known each other for years. She will be around my age and in a room full of people much older than me, never seen before, it's nice to see a familiar face.
"I have prepared more clothes for the next dress rehearsal!" She announces enthusiastically, clapping her hands in front of her. A big smile paints her face and I smile at her reflexively.
"Did you choose them this time?" I ask in a mixture of surprise and relief. They will definitely be better dress than they were this morning. Not that it takes much, actually.
She nods happily "It's my first assignment! I really hope you like them!" She sighs as the smile suddenly disappears from her face.
I look at her questioningly and follow her gaze.
Hero.
She is looking at Hero who is approaching us.
I want to laugh, but I hold back. I don't want her to think I'm making fun of her.
"Hey! I was about to come see what happened to you!" He puts his arm around my shoulder, smiling.
He pulls me towards him and I breathe in deeply his wonderful scent.
It tastes like coconut and lemon, a strange mix but it's kind of a drug for me now.
"They had asked for a ransom, but I paid out of my own pocket!" I make fun of him. "If I was waiting for you... Pfff!"
"The famous 'toilet gang'! Brrr... how scary!" He says seriously and then bursts out laughing with me.
I think these jokes only make the two of us laugh, but that's okay. I love that.
I turn amused towards Annie, who is looking at us shocked. She is completely engrossed in watching Hero.
"Have you met Annie yet?" I look at Hero and he gives her a gentle look.
"No yet" he holds out his hand "Nice to meet you, Annie!"
His smile lights up the room and makes me sigh for the thousandth time today.
He is always so kind to everyone! I love it!
Annie hesitantly holds out her hand "Hi! Hey! Hey, there!What's up? How's it going?" She rants something as she smiles from ear to ear and makes a gun gesture, complete with a wink.
I feel like laughing terribly and try to hold back.
Plus, I'm glad I'm not the only one who freaks out around this guy. It seems to be a normal thing, so much so that he doesn't even notice it.
"You're the costume designer, right?" Well, you can say everything about Hero, but not that he doesn't have a special thought for everyone. He learn the name of each person in the crew and the task they perform.
It's impressive!
She nods quickly, eyes wide. She's probably wondering how he knows what her role is, if they've never spoken before.
I don't know how he does it, it amazes me every time too.
He will have a folder in which he keeps everyone's photos and names, like an FBI file. A shady past as a secret agent.
Who knows?
Well, maybe I've been watching too many detective films lately. This is the result!
"Good! We'll see each other often on set then. Did you choose my clothes today?" He continues with the questions, trying to put her at ease but she's kind of in a mystical trance.
Hero's hand strokes my shoulder gently, drawing small circles, and I try desperately to focus on something else.
There is so much attraction between us, the air is electric.
"No, no" She shakes her head decisively "For now I'm assigned to Josephine" she looks at me full of pride. "Who knows, maybe one day..." She says it almost dreamily.
He smiles at her and nods "Great! Good job then!"
I hear her sigh, lost in who knows what thoughts about this fantastic boy who is hugging me.
I know, he has that effect.
"Could you excuse us for a moment? I need Jo for something."
Absurd. Whatever he says tonight, I can think of a dirty joke to tell him. Luckily I've managed to keep quiet for now.
Lips sealed!
We take a few steps away together and end up near a huge palm tree in the corner.
He takes his arm off my shoulder and stands in front of me.
I look at him waiting for him to say something to me.
"Anna asked me if we feel like rehearsing on set tomorrow, instead of in the hotel" He says in one breath. I have the impression that this worries him.
I don't know why, but it just seems that way.
I nod "Okay. No problem"
"At the lake," he says in a whisper, taking a deep breath immediately after.
He keeps looking at me like I should be the one worried. I don't see the point honestly.
In fact, I love the idea of starting to rehearse on set!
I look at him questioningly, trying to understand what makes him so nervous.
"At the lake!" He repeats, running a hand through his hair.
I know very well that if we go to the lake it means we will kiss, but I don't want anything else at the moment.
Hey, no! Tessa wants nothing else.
Not me.
No, no, no.
Tessa Lynn Young.
Understood?
"Great!" A sound escapes me that makes me sound more nervous than I actually am.
I let go of my anxiety as soon as we started rehearsing scenes together and now I'm just really excited.
But the idea of kissing him is even more exciting than shooting the entire film!
It's madness, right?
It will take crazy concentration to stay focus!
I sigh thinking how the hell am I going to kiss him thinking I'm Tessa.
"Great!" He repeats, looking at me carefully.
What exactly is he worried about? The thought that we will have to kiss, perhaps?
"What's bothering you?"
We exchange silent glances.
His eyes stay on mine until he finds the courage to speak.
"I..." He clears his throat "I wanted to apologize to you first" he lowers his voice to a whisper and comes closer to me.
He looks around to make sure no one is listening.
I smile at the thought of what happened in our room a few hours ago.
Our room?
"These are normal things, Hero. Really, I wasn't scared or anything!"
"Okay, but..." He sighs again "I wouldn't want this to change the relationship between us or for you to feel embarrassed being with me."
How sweet of him to worry about me like that?
My heart fills with sugar.
"Pfff... What nonsense! Nothing has changed!" I shake my head decisively. "Actually, maybe yes!"
He looks at me dumbfounded, without saying a word, worried again.
"You have no idea how many stupid jokes I'll make you as soon as we're alone!" I chuckle "You've only earned one way to let me bother you!"
He breathes a sigh of relief as he rubs the back of his neck, relieved.
"Everything is fine. Really! The important thing is that you feel at ease with me. And then I'm starting to get used to your jokes... Particulars!"
"Pfff... As if your english humor is better than mine!" I pat him on the shoulder making him laugh.
"So everything is okay between us?" He looks at me seriously.
I nod, biting my lip to hide a smile.
"And that brings me to another question!" Continues.
Jenny motions for us to join her at our seats at the table.
Hero looks at her and then at me, sighing.
He runs a hand through his hair again, looking back at Jenny who continues to motion for us to go there.
The speech will have to be postponed!
He sighs again, "Let's go...", as we walk together.
Our hands touch from time to time, but I try not to pay too much attention to it. I constantly feel like I'm a magnet, drawn to him, my magnet.
Lunch continues without a hitch and with lots of chatter here and there.
Every now and then I think about what Hero told me about tomorrow's program and a rush of adrenaline pleasantly runs through my body.
I don't know what he wanted to tell me just now, but I'm curious to find out.
Every now and then I turn towards him, sitting next to me and watch him while he talks to some of the guys from the crew. He laughs and jokes carefree.
It's a feast for the eyes!
When he turns to me, he places his hand on top of mine on the table and shakes it gently.
He doesn't seem to resist touching me either. I feel the same thing.
"Everything okay?" He whispers, looking at me carefully.
I nod. I would like to ask him what he wanted to tell me earlier but now probably wouldn't be the right time.
Hero, however, sees me thoughtful and is not satisfied with my answer.
"Write it!" He whispers to me again.
I furrow my eyebrows and look at him questioningly.
"Text me. Write it!" He smiles and then returns his attention to yet another person who is calling him.
In this case a tall, brunette woman with light blue eyes. She looks like a model because of how beautiful she is! She will be at least 20 centimeters taller than me!
I sigh, looking around thoughtfully but I am immediately awakened from the enchantment by a hand that, this time from under the table, intertwines with mine, tightening its grip.
I look up in surprise and meet his smiling eyes.
He mimes with his mouth "Write what you want to tell me" and it makes me smile.
That boy doesn't give up, eh?
I shake my head in amusement as I take my phone out of my bag.
'Are we secretly texting each other now?'
I send to his number and put the phone on the table, screen facing down.
Hero continues talking to the super mega model who is clearly flirting with him. You can tell from a mile away!
Banal. Granted. Boring.
Hero nonchalantly takes the phone from his pocket and opens the conversation with me, glancing at the screen briefly.
He chuckles before going back to talking to the girl in front of him and I giggle reflexively.
We laugh like two idiots without looking each other in the eyes.
'Yes' is the answer that comes to me, as he places the phone on his lap.
'Is this a coded response?' I type quickly, before dedicating my attention to the assistant director who is asking me questions.
'Yes' is Hero's reply, when I finally manage to pick up my phone, after a few minutes.
I want to laugh and I can barely contain myself.
'Is the super hottie telling you about her life?' I smile and send.
'Yes. No. I don't know', I intercept his amused look as he puts his cell phone away under the table again.
'A message longer than one word. Wow!'
'Yes'
I burst out laughing all by myself.
This is all absurd!
I hear him giggling next to me too but I try to look away, otherwise it will immediately be clear that we are texting each other.
There's no point even asking him what he wanted to tell me before, if his answers are monosyllables.
This all makes me laugh even more.
I also forgot what I was supposed to ask him.
A fork falls under the table, near my feet and I instinctively turn around, surprised by the noise.
I bend down to pick it up.
"Hey!" Hero whispers, taking me by surprise.
"You're crazy! What are you doing bent under the table?" This guy is going to give me an heart attack sooner or later.
"The same thing you do, apparently!" He takes the fork out of my hands "Thanks! I dropped it!"
I shake my head in amusement as I sit back down in my seat. He smiles doing the same thing, then picks up the phone again. All this while the super sexy model watches us curiously.
She's probably one of the few people I haven't introduced myself to. I don't remember her at all!
"Do you know Ramona?" Hero points at her and I smile at her, shaking my head.
I hold out my hand and she takes it in a firm grip.
"I just arrived a little while ago! Nice to meet you" she squeezes my hand and I quickly take it away, maintaining a formal smile.
"I'm Josephine, nice to meet you" Ouch, that hurt! Is she a bodybuilder? Did he want to take my hand off and keep it as a souvenir, by any chance?
"Oh, I know who you are, Josephine Langford!" She looks at me haughtily, although I don't understand why. "I personally dissected the clothes you wore today!"
Oh, she's the costume designer then?
The costume designer with shitty taste!
I want to laugh, but I hold back as much as possible.
"Ah, great!" I smile at her, not knowing what else to say.
I look to Hero for support and he jumps right in, asking her questions about her work.
It's like this now: we understand each other with a look. It's absurd and fascinating at the same time.
Finally the food we ordered arrives.
I'm super hungry and after the morning we've had, all I can think about is food.
And to the guy next to me.
Ok, so all I can think about is food and Hero, in that order.
Hero seems to think like me, as he devours the contents of his plate and then also goes around the buffet tables.
A little later he sits down again and calls me.
"I got some extra things for you too, if you like" he puts a plate full of super tempting things in the middle of our plates.
I look at him in amazement as he smiles at me. It's a really nice gesture on his part.
Above all, there are many different foods that touch each other!
"Could you stop making yourself more and more adorable? It's annoying!" I joke taking a sandwich from the plate "Thank you!" Whisper. His smile widens even more and he chuckles as he continues eating.
"I see you're learning," I giggle, pointing to the plate he's brought over now.
He shakes his head in amusement "I didn't do it on purpose, there was only one plate on the table!" He immediately justifies himself.
"Yeah, yeah. I'll pretend to believe it!" I take some pasta with my fork and point it at him laughing "The truth is that you are behaving like normal people and not like a psychopath! That's progress!"
"Would I be a psychopath?!?" He burst out laughing scandalized "This is madness!" He makes fun of me, saying the phrase I always say when something seems absurd to me.
He suddenly leans over and bites into the pasta for me, taking it straight from my fork.
After a moment of amazement, we burst out laughing again like two idiots.
I put a huge forkful of pasta in my mouth and eat satisfied.
"Yeah, yeah man!" I tease him, imitating his accent when he talks to friends on the phone.
We both continue to laugh as we taste everything on our plate.
At this point, however, I feel obliged to reciprocate the kind gesture he had towards me.
I observe the dessert buffet from afar and it looks very inviting!
I'm really incredibly hungry today.
I stand up, while Hero turns to me, continuing to talk to the director of photography. He looks at me questioningly but doesn't ask anything. I smile at him and step behind him, sliding my hands gently over his shoulders.
It's amazing how much I need constant contact with him.
He takes my hand a few moments before I take it off his shoulders and squeezes it almost in a caress. It lasts a second and my hand is back at my sides.
I bite my lip under his smiling gaze and walk away.
It was a poor contact and I would like more. Much more.
I take a deep breath and try to focus on the buffet.
Meanwhile I hear Hero resume the conversation he had briefly interrupted when I stood up and I concentrate on what I have to do: choose sweets for me and for him.
First rule: take more dishes. Food should not be touched on the same plate. So says British etiquette according to Hero, apparently.
If he can put everything on one plate just to make me happy, I can do the same thing by taking more plates.
I giggle to myself as I take three saucers and choose as many desserts.
I return to the table super proud of my choice but above all curious to see what Hero will look like when he sees all these different dishes.
Except that, when I sit down again, under the gaze of those close to me, given the disproportionate quantity of sweets I have taken, Hero is no longer at the table.
"They're for Hero... I didn't get them just for myself!" I smile a little embarrassed.
I look around, under the questioning gazes of others and sigh.
"He got me some food from the buffet, I wanted to reciprocate..." I justify myself again and I don't even know why.
Do I have to explain to someone?
And if I wanted to eat all these desserts, what problem would there be?
I look around, but there's no sign of Hero anywhere.
Well, it means I'll eat in the meantime.
Minutes pass and the boy who crowds my thoughts lately seems to have just disappeared and, if we really want to be precise, even the super model Ramona, aka shitty costume designer, is no longer seen anywhere.
I'm not a jealous person. I've never been this way, not even when I was in a relationship, and I have no idea why my stomach feels so burning.
I eat a huge forkful of Sacher to suppress the absurd thoughts that are coming to me right now.
Did he go to the bathroom?
And then, even if he had secluded himself with Ramona, what would be the problem?
He is single and can definitely do whatever he wants.
Pfff... Imagine if I'm jealous! What nonsense.
I finish the sacher without even realizing it.
I look at the other sweets in front of me and I don't see the point in wasting them like this, right? It would be a real shame.
Two pieces of tiramisu are looking at me invitingly and who am I, to refuse?
I change my plate and move on to the tiramisu.
Hero's chair moves and I turn, eager to see him again. Finally!
I can't really be jealous, right?
That would be madness!
Anna smiles at me and my idea of seeing Hero shatters on my face. She sat in his place and I hope with all my heart that she doesn't understand what I'm thinking.
"He went with Ramona" she looks at me hesitantly to gauge my reaction.
Well, I'm definitely an open book.
"Who?" I casually eat another forkful of dessert.
"Jo, is everything okay?" She places a hand on my shoulder. She almost seems sad to me.
Why?
Because Hero first invite me out to dinner and then disappear with a Russian whore, to do who knows what?
They will be kissing on the back.
Or worse, they'll be having sex in the bathroom.
Damn!
My heart skips a beat.
Nah, I'm not jealous.
All this has no effect on me.
Nada.
Rien.
Nothing!
"Of course I'm fine!" I look at her like she's crazy.
The only one going crazy here is me!
My attention falls on the last plate of dessert but I give up: I would feel bad if I ate it all! The black forest cake seems really good, but it would be the final blow for my already upset stomach!
I've never been jealous of anyone in my life, what's this about now?
"Mmm..." Anna sighs, leaving a caress on my arm "You can confide in me for anything. I wanted to let you know" she smiles kindly at me and I almost feel guilty hiding from her what is happening between me and Hero.
But the question is: is something happening or did I just imagine it?
At this point I have doubts.
Hero returns, after an infinite amount of time, and smiles at Anna, asking her for information about tomorrow.
I can't follow the conversation. I'm hypnotized by Ramona who is fixing her makeup, very concentrated, practically in front of me.
There are toilets for this, perhaps she isn't aware of it. I should point this out to her.
The idea that they could have seriously secluded themselves somewhere together makes my blood boil in my veins.
I know, I have no right to think these things and blah blah blah, but I think them. Arrest me for this!
I'm more and more nervous, in a loop of incoherent thoughts and I just want to get out of here. I need to get some air.
I suddenly stand up as Anna looks at me in surprise. Hero smiles and watches me grab my bag from the chair.
"I'm going out for a second. I have to make a phone call!" Lie. I just need to go out for a breather!
I have chaos in my head!
I come out like a hurricane and breathe in the hot Atlanta air. Anything, just to not stay in there.
This terrible climate that makes me sweat instantly is also reassuring, but I don't regret the air conditioning in the restaurant if it means being alone for a bit, to calm my thoughts.
I take out my cell phone and consider whether to call Mia. I do a quick calculation of the time zone but I don't think it's worth calling her when it's late in the evening at her place. She has an audition tomorrow for a fashion house and will have gone to bed early.
My cell phone vibrates in my hands.
'Tonight, you and me. What do you say?'
It's a message from Hero. My heart skips a beat but I remind myself that this is the same boy who disappeared, for what seemed like hours, with a beautiful woman. Beautiful and looks like a model. Nothing to do with me.
I sigh, rolling my eyes. I turn my back to the restaurant to prevent anyone from seeing what I'm doing and I'm fascinated by observing the people going in and out of the nearby shops.
A few minutes pass and little by little the mind seems to calm down. The nervousness is passing and I can see things more clearly.
But, as my mother always says: if something is wrong, you have to talk about it!
And that's what I'll do, as soon as we're alone again. I just have to find a way to not look like a jealous girlfriend.
"You got them for me" I would recognize his voice anywhere, with this damn sexy accent.
Damn him!
I turn and find him next to me, with his hands in his trouser pockets and a light smile on his face.
"You bought me sweets, Anna told me" he continues in a whisper.
"Yeah!" I turn back to the street, sighing softly.
"Thanks... Even though you practically ate them all!" He chuckles, rubbing the back of his neck.
I appreciate that he wants to ease the tension but it's not making the situation any better. Not at all!
I keep telling myself that I have no right to be angry, but I am and there's nothing I can do about it now.
"I'm sorry. It took me too long to get back to the table" I feel his gaze on me, but I don't turn.
I close my eyes, rubbing my shoulder. It's been bothering me since this morning and the tension I feel now doesn't help at all.
When I open them again, he has come closer and is practically in front of me.
"Are you angry?" Keep watching me to figure out what's wrong.
"A little... Yes, a little... But it will pass soon, don't worry!" I take a deep breath.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
The only way to resolve my doubts is to talk. I know this too but pride is always a big obstacle to overcome.
I clear my throat "The tiramisu was excellent, the sacher a little less"
Evidently nothing of what I had in mind came out.
"I'm sure of it" he sighs "The black forest on the other hand wasn't that great!"
I look up at him indignantly "Did you eat my dessert?!?" I blurt out, as if the problem was actually the dessert. Nothing could be further from reality.
"Didn't you get it for me?" The smile disappears from his face.
Are we about to fight over dessert?
I would laugh if I wasn't getting angrier and angrier.
"Of course not!" I snort "I..."
Seconds pass, but I don't continue the sentence.
I should admit that I'm stupidly jealous and that I'd rather argue over dessert than talk to him about this thing, because it seems absurd to me either way.
"Do you want to be alone for a while?" He asks sensing my agitation.
I nod decisively "Yes!" I would like to go back to the hotel, but I know that would be rude to everyone.
I'll just have to stay out here for a few more minutes and then hope that this lunch will end soon. I'm shocked.
"Okay..." He turns and walks back towards the restaurant entrance.
He stops after a few steps and turns back to me.
"I know you're probably going to say no to me now, but if you'd like, I've booked something for the two of us tonight. It's a surprise. I'll send you the address so you can choose whether to join me or not."
I look at him and feel terribly guilty for treating him like this.
I sigh, closing my eyes.
Pride must be put aside, in certain cases. And this is one of them.
"Hero..." I take a deep breath "Can we talk for a moment?"
We are adults, I can't behave like a two year old.
Damn pride!
He nods and walks back to me, hands back in his pockets.
I spot a bench at the side of the restaurant and I signal him to go and sit there.
We'll be out of sight and earshot of prying ears this way.
"I know, you'll probably think I'm crazy and I wouldn't even blame you." Not the best way to start a speech, but it's the best I've managed to do at the moment.
He looks at me attentively, remaining silent next to me.
"It's none of my business, I'm aware of that but I need to know something. Where did you go with Ramona before?" I say it all in one breath.
I'm proud of myself because I managed to give voice to my doubts, without them wearing me down inside.
It took a while, but the result counts.
"We were in the next room, there was less noise" he replies, observing me attentively.
I don't know if I want to hear what he has to say. I probably screwed up asking him.
"I booked something for tonight and I needed her help. Her husband is the director of photography and has a place downtown"
I look at him in amazement and mentally record the words he just said to me. Especially the part where she is married!!!
"Ah!" That's all I can say.
My mind sometimes goes on absurd flights of fancy that deserve an Oscar!
Shit! Why do I always think the worst?
"With such short notice She had to contact the staff personally to book everything!" Continues.
"Everything... what?" The pieces of the puzzle are falling back into place. Indeed, the gentleman who sat in front of me was also missing from his seat. The director of photography, in fact.
"That's if you still want to go out with me!" He bites his lip and sighs, ignoring my question. "You don't seem very enthusiastic anymore."
What a fool I was! I even treated him badly and he's here still inviting me to come out! I sigh, closing my eyes for a moment. I at least owe him an apology!
"No, Hero!" I shake my head "I'm really sorry for my behavior before! I still want to go out with you! I panicked when I saw that you two disappeared together and..." I sigh looking for the right words.
"Were you jealous of me and Ramona?" He says this with genuine amazement on his face that makes me blush.
I run a hand over my face and sigh.
How did I think of something like that?
"I like you jealous!" He jokes, giggling and lightly pushing my shoulder.
"Oh, stop it!" I pat him on the shoulder right before he starts tickling me. I burst out laughing loudly, wriggling on the bench under his amused gaze.
"Time out!" I shout bringing my hands forward.
He grabs them and brings them to his chest.
His heart beats very fast, I can feel it thundering under my fingers.
"So for tonight..." He asks again for confirmation.
"Yes!" I reply, making him laugh.
"Yes?" He repeats amusedly.
He puts his arm around my shoulders and pulls me towards him, placing a kiss on my head.
I nod smiling as my nervousness melts like snow in the sun.
"Yes," he whispers into my hair again.
I can't wait for tonight.
I have less weight on my stomach.
"But I don't forgive you for eating my cake!" I point a finger at his chest and we both burst out laughing.
"I'll make it up to you!" He whispers giving me shivers everywhere.
This day is full of emotions.
And it's not over yet!
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Author's notes
Get ready because the next chapter will see Hero and Jo going out on a date and who knows what will happen?
Any guesses? ❤️
Thank you so much for reading my story!❤️
A Hug
Vanessa