It's when the sunrise peers through the window curtains that I slowly open my eyes. I take a deep breath and see my hand still on Claire's side; neither of us moved an inch. I move my hand to stretch my arms and body awake and feel Claire moving her legs around. Since she's rolled over I couldn't see the phone in her hand when I went to kiss her shoulder. She must've been up a little longer than I have.
She finished typing something and put it down to roll over to me. Neither of us say anything, just tangling our legs and hands together. She lets out a few cute groans when stretching one arm out across my face and I laugh, playfully pushing her arm off and moving my body down. We cuddle a bit more when my head is laying on her stomach and she's playing with my hair.
"So, what do you have planned for us today?" I mumble and kiss her abdomen.
"It might be a bit windy but we're going to take a ferry tour. Is that okay?"
"Of course. I'll wear my fanny pack," I make her laugh and that makes me smile and kiss her more.
It doesn't take long for me to get ready when she's still trying to figure out what to do with her hair. I look at her from the bedroom and smile as she stares in the mirror holding a hair tie in her hand. I walk out to the living room thinking it's probably a good idea to call my dad and text my friends after realizing they sent me multiple messages wondering what I'm up to.
"You're lucky I'm up early," his mouth sounds full of food. "How's the convention? What's on the agenda today?" No suspicion, I'm still in the clear.
"It's really cool, I've met a lot of people, have gotten to know my coworkers, and I've seen some nerdy things!" I feel a little guilty with how good of a liar I am. "Today there are a few guest speakers and tech presenters I think so I'll call you later."
"Okay have a good day. Have you talked to your mom?" He asks as he bites into something and chews.
"I texted her a little bit yesterday." My mom and I keep it short and simple, she's not up my ass as much.
"Good. Well, have fun. Call me later."
"Okay, love you."
I read a few more messages. One from Tayler, to which I respond that I'm wrapped up all weekend. Another few from Megane.
"What the heck is going on over there?!" "I'm dying to know."
I respond to her that we're keeping busy and I'll have a full report when I get back.
I feel guilty for lying to my dad and Tayler for a few minutes when Claire walks into the room and my mind shifts elsewhere. She decided on a simple pony tail that probably took no effort at all yet looks flawless.
"I just called Edan and he should be downstairs with the car in a bit." She walks over to the pantry and grabs two waters.
"Sounds good. Just gonna respond to a few texts, might have forgotten to tell my friends I was leaving town."
"Do they know about me?" I can't read her expression if it's concerning or just curious.
"They saw us dancing at the club but that's all they think happened." I freeze for a moment. "Should I tell them? I mean my sister knows..." I feel anxious and nervous; I don't want to ruin anything.
"Well I've told my best friend about you and Edan is sworn to confidentiality but that's up to you! Don't think you have to hide things just because of my profession, you have a life too. I trust you."
"You told your best friend?" My nervousness went away the minute she said that, and I feel like a giddy kid inside.
"You met her at the club, the one who stopped that loser from talking to you so I could steal you away." She let out a small laugh and felt her phone ringing in her hand to see Edan calling. "Shall we?"
I follow her out the door with the intention to finish this conversation. There isn't exactly a 'Dating a Celebrity for Dummy's' book so I need to ask all the questions I can while I'm here with her. Are we even dating?
As we step into the elevator my mind wanders off again to what this is. She flew me out here, she took me to a public art event, and now she's taking me on a ferry tour. That sounds like dating. Oh, and we've had sex.
I'm in the midst of a back and forth conversation in my mind when she takes my hand and walks us out to the car; Edan standing with the door open as we approach. I let her in first, follow, and Edan shuts the door behind us.
"There are a few hats and jackets in the back in case you want them for the ferry Miss Claire," Edan shuts his door and puts the car in drive.
"Thanks, E." I say staring out the window not realizing what just came out of my mouth and both of them turn to me.
"Did you just give Edan a nickname?" They look at each other and laugh.
"I like it, P" He says back to me, laughs, and drives us off into the hustle of Saturday traffic.
Claire laughs with me and smiles, taking my hand and scooting in the middle seat next to me. I go back and forth with the view of the city and looking at her as I play with her fingers in my hand.
"What's your favorite thing?" I look at the city and figure she'd get that I'm asking about New York.
"Everything." She says confidently though I was hoping for something more specific. "I know I've said it before, but really everything, Parker. The people, the sounds, the shows, the night life, how vibrant it is, the opportunity; there's too much to choose from."
"I like this place." I smile at her and keep her hand tight in mine.
Edan pulls into a tow zone but obviously gives no fucks as he parks and turns to us.
"It seems a bit windy, so it'll be a little cooler out on the ferry. I'll grab you both jackets and hats. Just fasten it tight." He steps out, opens the back door to pull two thick jackets and two baseball caps from a bin, and hands them to us still in the back seat.
"Thanks, E." Claire says to him and looks childishly at me.
I grab the cap and notice the NY Yankee logo on it.
"Of course." I look at Claire with a smirk and put it on.
"Not a fan?" She smirks back to me as she puts hers on.
"More of a Cubs follower but I look good in anything." She flirtingly slaps my arm and pushes me out the car door.
Edan follows us as we get to the ferry waiting area and hands Claire our tickets.
"Call me if you need anything. I'll be here."
We hear an announcement that our ferry is ready to board as we stand in line. I look around to see if anyone is staring at us, but so far, we're clear. We walk on and she immediately finds the stairs to walk us to the top.
I still keep my eyes out for anyone following us or staring but everyone seems to be minding their business. I'm just used to the chaos I see on TV. We get to a railing and just hang there, staring at the city as the ferry pulls away from the dock. We're leaning over the railing when I take her arm, wrap it under mine and kiss her cheek. She plays with my hands when I start to shift my body to face her. A view of the city in the background with the most beautiful girl in front of me.
The ferry goes around Manhattan showing views to the entire skyline and eventually the Statue of Liberty. We don't talk too much with the wind blowing lightly in our faces, but we hold one another never wanting to let go. I look around to a few couples taking pictures and pointing out landmarks. Claire must have seen me doing so.
"Give me your phone." She demands, and I comply.
She finds the camera app and pulls me in close, "Smile". I grab her close as she takes our picture with the city as background. Cheesy selfie. She brings it closer for us to see.
"I love it." I say and put my phone back in my pocket.
We walk off the ferry and see Edan waiting for us, following him back to the car.
"Thank you for everything." I whisper in her ear as we walk.
"More adventures to come." She whispers back to me and kisses my cheek.
My heart races and I can't help but let out a big grin. There really is something here. It's not just an experiment for me and not just fun for her. All other realities escape me as I walk with Claire down the streets of Manhattan. My mind not once wonders to work, friends or Sean . My mind is occupied by the fact that I have never felt this way, and so suddenly. I've known Claire a few weeks and can't see the rest of my life without her, without this feeling.
On the way back to her apartment I'm feeling a mix of genuine happiness and confusion. My mind paces back between wanting to keep seeing her to wondering how dating her could ever work. Up until the night I met her, my life has seemed like a puzzle that was already solved. The pieces were all there, I just needed to put them together. I'm not sure that I even want to solve that puzzle anymore.
Edan pulls up to Claire's apartment and parks.
"Will you be needing anything else today, Miss Claire?"
"I think we're all set for today, thank you Edan." I get the feeling her mind is doing the same thing mine is.
Claire goes to the kitchen the moment we walk into her apartment and grabs two wine glasses. It's just after lunch time. She preheats the oven and I walk slowly to her wondering what we're doing. She pulls the box of pizza from the freezer and finds a cooking tray to put it on. I take the box and open it as she pours us a glass of white wine. She hands me a glass and I set it down; I can tell something is on her mind. I grab hers from her hand, set it down, and hold her face in my hands. I take off her hat and toss it somewhere in the living room, kiss her a few times and look into her gorgeous green eyes, "Something's on your mind."
I put the pizza in the oven as she takes our glasses and walks to the living room. I take off my hat and shake my hair around as I pop a seat next to her on the rug sitting against the couch. She takes a sip and looks at me, I can't read her expression.
"So, we obviously like each other." She says calmly.
"Obviously." I nod.
"And I know I've only known you like one week and it was probably crazy that I flew you out here so suddenly but of all my experiences and adventures, I've never felt like this. Not with anyone or anything." My nervousness fades and I look at her with sincerity.
"I haven't either, Claire. And I know that may not be saying much since I've only had one long relationship my whole life, but ever since I caught your eye that night nothing has been the same for me." I take a deep breath and know I have to put it all out on the table, "I don't know what it is about you or about us, but life seems much more vibrant and meaningful. I'm still figuring it out but, fuck, I want to keep doing things with you." I take a sip from my wine and lightly scratch her leg.
"I do too, Parker. I want to keep this going how it is but I do have to say, it'll be so much harder to be with me than how you know dating to be. We've been lucky this weekend with how there's been no cameras in our faces, but it gets bad sometimes, really bad. And not just that but my schedule lately is the busiest I've ever been, partly why things were so tense with Jason." I can feel her starting to get worked up, but I can't stop her as much as I want to kiss her lips quiet.
"Being busy is one thing, but to also be across the country so often and traveling for work as I do, is hard and I can't have you flying out to me every week. You have a life and goals too; I can't ask you to do that."
I grab her arms to calm her down a bit.
"It will be hard, there's no doubt about it. I understand you don't want to give up everything and fly out to see you all the time but what if I want to? Let's at least see where this goes." She looks from my hands on her legs to my eyes. "Claire, what if I've been so unknowingly unsatisfied with my life that maybe what I want is to actually try something new? I'm not saying I'm going to pack up my things and follow you around but, I don't know, maybe eventually I can see myself in this city? Or see myself traveling around. It's a lot to say for knowing you for a short time but let's just see? One day at a time." My expression turns happy and optimistic.
"Let's not think that far ahead. With how flexible my internship is and how you travel to the west coast sometimes, we can see each other." I take a deep breath and can feel her fingers tangling in mine; my eyes look at our hands. "I don't want to go the rest of my life not feeling how I do now, that seems like a life of misery."
We're both twirling our fingers around and softly scratching one another's hands for a few quiet seconds. I take a moment from thinking about my time with Claire and contemplate whether I really enjoy engineering, my internship, or having my life so planned out. I think about what the hell I would do for money if I decided to just quit everything and pack my shit to move to the city but that's too risky for me; much too out of my comfort zone. Then again, Claire has showed me that that is what life is all about. She can see my eyes gazing back and forth, unfocused looking around the room.
"Don't do anything rash." She catches my immediate attention because she probably knows exactly what I'm thinking. "Whatever this is, it's great. It's amazing, and I know we can see each other here and there but don't lose sight of your dreams for anyone. You have such bright future ahead that I don't want you to give up anything for me." My eyes shift back down to our hands.
I sit for a moment in silence and can feel her observe me. Am I really contemplating changing my whole future, quitting my one last semester of school, and leaving the one place I have only truly known to be home, for a girl? But it's not just a girl. It's not just Claire Emerson. It's a serious fucking game changer. It's real emotion and real happiness that is energizing through my body giving me the best feeling I have ever known. She isn't like a drug causing my body to be addicted, she is the cure saving me from a toxic cycle of expectations.
"I won't do anything rash." I decide to not make an incredibly life changing decision without taking the time to think for myself and I can sense that it's what Claire would want me to do anyway. "I just feel so exhilarated with you and would like to see where things go."
We both smile and untangle our fingers to take a sip of wine when the oven goes off. Claire fidgets when I motion her to sit while I get up and take the pizza out. I can sense her green eyes locked on me.
"Pizza cutter?" I place the pizza on the counter and look at her pointing to a drawer.
"Two drawers from the sink." She takes another sip of wine. "Do you smoke?"
I set the pizza cutter down on the counter waiting for the pizza to cool off and look at her a little off guard.
"Like cigarettes or weed?" I realize I must sound like an innocent high schooler.
"Weed." She says bluntly.
"I mean sometimes, but I don't own my own pipe or have a weed guy." I say jokingly to lighten her seriousness. "Do you?"
"I rarely get to, but I enjoy it sometimes."
"Yeah, same here." I open a few cupboards before I find the one with plates.
"Do you want to? I have some. If you want. Just edibles." She smiles at me probably knowing how much this is throwing me off.
"Alright," I laugh, and she gets up from the couch and goes to the pantry.
"Do you want a brownie or gummy bear?"
"You pick."
She opens a bag and hands me a small green gummy bear. I bite half and look at her. She takes a whole one; guess I should do the same. I turn around to the pizza and start cutting it into six slices and hand Claire a plate. We each grab three slices and I walk towards her dining room table as she walks to the living room.
"Nope, we're gonna do this day right. Get high and eat pizza on the floor, watching TV." She says to me then bites into a slice.
"You brought me out to New York to eat frozen pizza on the floor?" I say sarcastically and smile.
We sit down on her rug and I finish the rest of my wine realizing how fucking cross-faded I'll end up being with how much of a lightweight I am. Claire turns on the TV to a comedy special I've never seen.
"These days are my favorite." She says wiping her hands with a napkin and placing her finished plate across the coffee table.
"Mine too," I say with my mouthful chewing the last bit of the crust; she lets out a small laugh and kisses my cheek.