Avni could feel the jitters wrecking her body after the little act of bravery she just pulled last night. It was as if she was in a haze, after all those years of waiting while watching him from afar, he was finally in front of her, so close & so intimate, she couldn't stop herself from getting a taste of him, because in that moment she knew that even he wanted her, & she wasn't making things up in her mind, she had seen it in his gorgeous hazel brown eyes, she had seen the way his eyes dilated when they were so close to each other.
The whole night passed by in a frenzy, however, along with the dawn of the day, came the dawn of realisation of what she had really done! Neil didn't know about her one-sided obsession for him, and she felt like facing him at the breakfast was going to be awkward with a capital A!
However, when she came to the dining table, she observed that Neil was uncharacteristically chill as he served her food. He flashed a smirky grin at her as he wished her morning while she just tried to make sure that her lungs take in enough oxygen when her breathing became erratic.
Avni was chewing on the pancake when Neil suddenly got up from his chair & bent towards her over the table. She could feel her eyes widening the size of saucers as she blinked them rapidly when he put his hand on the base of her neck & held her chin with his thumb. Her chest heaved up & down when his thumb rubbed the corner of her lips in gentle motions.
A - Ky-kya kar rhe hain aap? - she breathily whispered.
N - Uh, there was some syrup there. Just helped you up! - he spoke too innocently as he sat back in his chair.
Avni did not miss the chortle that left his throat while her cheeks heated up & she was sure that they were the colour of strawberries now!
N - Uh, there is a party today, it's my friend Ali's birthday! Do you think you wanna come? - he asked as he took in a bite of pancakes.
A - Your friends won't mind me ? - she wondered.
N - No, Avni. - he smiled. I'm sure they'll enjoy your company. Be ready at 7 in the evening, okay? - he said while she just nodded with a smile.
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Avni looked at herself in the mirror as she took her look in. She had worn his favourite colour today, white! Her round-neck white kurta had high side slits & and she had paired it up with light blue denim with simple chappals. She had worn dangling oxidized jhumkas & had left her hair open. Crossing her index finger with the middle one, she moved out of the room as she nervously bit the corners of her lower lip.
The sound of her oxidized bangles grabbed Neil's attention as he turned to look at her. He was checking some mails on his phone when he turned towards her & looked up. He blinked away & in a haste to reply to the mail, he looked back at his phone but then bobbed his head back up when his mind finally registered the way she looked. Neil couldn't blink anymore as he looked at her. He had had his fair share of girls but had never seen someone so beautiful even in the simplest of outfits & with the minimal of accessories. She looked like a vision to him & he had a sudden urge to capture her in his camera & the thought was weird to even him as he had not picked his camera up in years now! What was this girl even doing to him!?
He was still in a state of daze when his phone rang, breaking his trance. Jolting a little in surprise, he picked the phone up & gestured Avni to moved outside the house as he himself moved out with her.
The car ride was mostly silent with music filling in for the silence. However, both of them did make sure to steal some glances when they thought that the other one wasn't looking.
Avni walked besides Neil as he walked them inside the party hall. He introduced Avni to his friend Ali, his wife Rhea, & some other friends while they all greeted her warmly. At the moment, both of them were talking to Rhea when she saw a lady approaching them. She greeted Rhea with a genuine smile & then turned towards Neil as she flashed a smile at him.
Lady - Look who is finally here! Long time no see, huh Neil? - she teased.
N - Just work, Tripti! - he scratched the back of his neck. How are you? - he smiled back at her while Avni just watched the two of them interact.
T - I'm peachy. But, I missed you, babe! - she said making Neil laugh while Avni couldn't really process what she just heard.
N - I'm sorry to keep you waiting, honey! - he laughed as Tripti put a hand on her chest dramatically making Rhea laugh.
Avni could feel her eyes stinging as a very known fear gripped her heart. She looked at Tripti through her peripheral vision & then looked at herself with her blurry eyes.
Of course he thought of him as a kid! She could never be the lady Tripti was! She was elegant & beautiful, while Avni couldn't even walk two steps without stumbling on her own foot. Of course, he would never see her as a woman!
Avni bit her lips and blinked her eyes rapidly while looking down as she tried to stop the tears from falling down her eyes & shifted on her feet uncomfortably.
T - Who is this pretty lady, Rhea? - she asked.
N - Oh! She's Avni. My...my friend! - he introduced before Rhea could.
T - Oh, Hey! Hi, Avni. I'm Tripti. I was in college with Neil. - she told as she stretched her hand out for a handshake.
Avni looked up at her, bit the insides of her lips as she looked at Neil who was smiling at her & then again looked back at Tripti. She offered her a small smile as she timidly shook her hand.
A - Hi, Tripti! You look beautiful! - she complimented genuinely.
T - Thankyou, Avni! So do you!- she smiled back while Avni just nodded.
The rest of the party went by in a blur for Avni as she tried her best to look alright when what she was feeling was far far away from being alright. She just wanted it to end & cry herself to sleep.
Neil doubtlessly noticed the shift in Avni's demeanor but couldn't figure what led to it. He even asked her if she was feeling unwell, or if she had a headache, if she wanted to head back home. But every time, she just said that she was okay, however, Neil knew better. So, after the cake was cut, he politely took his leave from Ali. Though he insisted them to stay, Neil convinced him that he'd meet up soon.
They were in the car when Avni was just looking out of the window as her hands rested on her lap. Exhaling a long breathe, Neil intwined the index finger of his left hand with hers. He slowed down the speed of the car as he tugged on her finger in order to make her look at him.
N - What's wrong, Avni? - he asked slowly. Do you miss Indore? - he spoke again when she didn't say anything.
A - No - she shook her head. I'm fine, its..its nothing! I'll be fine. - she tried to give him a small smile but it came out more like a grimace.
N - Is it about something that I did? Did I..upset you anyway? - he looked at her as he stopped the car at the signal.
A - No! - she chuckled. It's about something you didn't do! - a hopeless sigh left her mouth as she spoke under her breathe but unknown to her, he heard it anyway.
Neil was silent during the rest of the ride & Avni couldn't wait to dash into her bed & cry her eyes out. Reaching the apartment, both of them silently moved towards the corridor where their rooms were. And, just when Avni was about to open the door of her room, Neil held her wrist as he felt her pulse on his thumb. Avni gulped as she turned to look at him & raised her eyes brows at him.
N - I hope you know that I & Tripti are just friends! - he spoke nervously as he was too unsure of her reaction. Uh, the way we addressed each other at the party...it's an inside joke among our friends' group. We, had played a couple in one of the dramas at our college! - he told while looking at her for her reaction.
Avni tamed her stupid heart before it could start racing again with hope at what Neil had just said. She couldn't let herself fall for him even more than she already had without knowing how he felt about her. She wasn't going to ask him if he loved her yet, but she definitely needed some confirmation or some sign, that he intended to love her, that he intended to give them a chance! Cause if not, she was in for huge trouble! Her heart could only take this much!
A - Why are you telling this to me, Neil? - she asked while looking into his eyes & just like that, Neil could feel his dark brown forest being taken over by charcoal black night!
N - I don't know! I..I just needed you to know that I am not seeing someone. - he spoke as he voice grew hoarse.
A - Why? - she whispered.
Neil didn't know how to answer that. He didn't know how to explain the pull he felt towards her, he didn't know how to explain the tug his heart felt every time she smiled at him, or with him. All he knew was that he didn't want her to distance herself from him, he knew he was being selfish, they were probably not the best match out there. She probably deserved someone who was young & outgoing as her, & not someone who struggled to cope with his parents' death even when it happened thirteen years ago! She deserved someone better!
And, suddenly, Neil felt too exhausted to fight back the pull he felt towards her. He was too drained & needed some comfort that only she seemed to provide. So, thinking that he would take care of it all when the morning comes, he allowed himself the night to dwell upon his irrational thoughts.
Still rubbing his thumb on her wrist in circular motions, he stepped towards her & pressed his lips against her cheek. His lips lingered there as he took in her scent & felt her pulse rising against his thumb on his wrist. Avni clutched the hem of his shirt as she held on to it to keep herself from stumbling back. Her chest heaved as she inhaled deeply, brushing herself against his chest.
Just when Avni thought that the butterflies in her stomach were going to explode, he pulled back & rubbed the tip of her nose against his.
N - Good night, Avni! Please lock your door! - he said as he turned around & entered his room while Avni tried to calm her racing heart down.
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Neil woke up in a gloomy mood the next morning, he had no office since it was a Sunday, and, he wanted to sleep through the day, but let's just say that he & sleep weren't really on quite good terms! Changing into his joggers, he went for a morning run & came back a little late than his usual time.
However, he wasn't expecting to see what he found when he came back. There was her! Wearing a flared off white suit, she had tied her long hair in a loose messy bun with her round earrings dangling from her ears, brushing against her neck. She struggled with the dupatta on her shoulder as she packed some food in containers & Neil was sure it wasn't just for the two of them. It was enough to serve fifty people. His brows furrowed in confusion as he walked towards her.
N - What are you doing, Avni?
A - Oh, you came back! - she looked at him. I, uh, prepared halwa - puri. Do you...do you think you'd like to go to the nearby old-age home with me? - she asked nervously as she fiddled with the lid of the box in which she had packed puri.
N - Why today? - he asked with an expressionless face.
A - Neil! - she exhaled a breathe. I know it's your parents' death-anniversary today! Papa told me you'll be wanting to sleep through the day. But, please come with me! - she blinked her eyes.
Neil could feel his throat clogging up with emotions as his eyes started to sting. He didn't really know if he teared up because he was missing his parents or, because he was so grateful for Avni's presence.
He had lost his parents in a car accident when he was just fifteen years old. Ashish & Neela, Avni's parents were like family to his parents. They had been childhood friends. And, after his parents' untimely demise, Ashish & Neela had done their best to give him the best life possible. They took care of his studies, his interests & all other things. They had always visited him on this day while he was in school, & honestly, summer-breaks at their home were the only time of the year which didn't feel gloomy. Neil could never thank them enough for what they had done for him. They were his family, his found family that he was sure his parents' had blessed him with.
Neil only realised that he was weeping when Avni wiped his tears with her finger tips. She had wrapped her index finger around his & was rubbing her thumb against his knuckles as he stood there while blinking his eyes.
A - It's going to be okay, Neil. - she said with a small smile. We're going to be okay! - she murmured as she wrapped her arms around his torso & put her head against his chest.
Neil's hands itched to touch her, to hold her, and his heart finally got a taste of what peace felt like, of what to have somebody felt like, & he wanted more! He put one of his hands on her lower back & the other on her neck as he pulled her more into him. He inhaled deeply as he put his chin above her head & hugged her tightly.
A - Now go, take a shower! You're sweaty. - she laughed through her teary eyes as she looked up at him.
A deep chuckle left Neil's throat that vibrated through his chest & Avni could feel it with her palm against his chest as she watched him.
N - Give me 10 minutes, I'll just come! - he said as he rushed towards his bedroom while Avni just nodded in answer.