4~ He's A Hayes
School ended in a non-memorable way. The day was boring but I'm glad it went by faster than expected. The most exciting thing to come out of this was my encounter with Saida. I still couldn't make sense of what it meant, but my mind couldn't stop thinking about it either. So much so that my dance teacher called me out for being distracted. It wasn't the best day to start pointe when there was so much more to be worried about. I clamored to get to the next level for 3 years and I'm already about to squander it. There needed to be a balance between my level of focus and telling Saida I had feelings for her. It was so hard to figure out but I'll get there.
As for the end of the day, David and Issac had practice while Kailey, Mason, and I were supposed to go to Saida's. She wanted to have this sleepover for whatever reason. The details were missing on our part, but Saida insisted we come. No one could ever turn her down. Especially not when she made that cute pouty face. Her brown eyes got bigger than they already were with her voice getting high-pitched. The manipulation was calculated but it's only because I like her so much.
Unfortunately, Mason decided to back out last minute since they had a private date with someone. That came as a shock to us all. Mason dated but they never dated exclusively. To add to that, this is the first time they won't disclose a name. The person they were seeing was a complete mystery. No matter how much we begged and pleaded, Mason would not give us any details. Not even a small hint as to who it was. They were afraid we would guess it too easily if a hint were given. They were most likely right about that.
So, without Mason, it was just us 3 going over to Saida's. It was much more relaxing riding in the car either way with just her and I. Kailey followed behind us as she drove her Tesla to school. The air was breezy as Saida had the windows rolled down. It was perfect with the spring-like air as it wasn't too cold nor too hot. Now and again I'd look over at Saida whose hair flowed through the breeze so elegantly. My heart comes to a stop every time she comes into my view. She made everything look effortless.
Peaking over, Saida caught me staring as she pursed her lips. My head quickly snaps the other direction because I didn't want her to see the longing in my eyes. I never used to be so wrapped in her. My crush was still prominent but way easier to manage back then. Prom was causing my feelings to heighten to new levels. The fear that she'd find out without me saying anything nestled itself in the back of my mind. Everything would go to shit if she knows without me telling her.
Still, Saida giggled trying to stay focused on the road. "Is there something on my face now?" She asked. Her voice was giddy.
My head shakes with a slight smile on my face. "Nothing I just...I wish I could be as gorgeous as you." I admit.
Her eyes rolled. "Oh, stop that Summer. You're beautiful." She smiles. "Stop self-loathing because we have other important matters to discuss."
I laughed. "Yes ma'am."
I wouldn't call it self-loathing. What I said is truly my opinion. Of course, I'm not attracted to myself so I'm a little biased. She never did like when people told self-deprecating jokes. She believed that everyone was beautiful in their own way. It would be nice if that were true but some people are simply ugly. And I'm not talking about physical appearance.
I'd listen to her as we approached Saida's house. It wasn't the thing I loved to do in my free time, but here we were. Her mom is very...condescending in a way that just ruffles your feathers. She's sort of nice to me because my stepfather, Jeremy, works for their family and has for years. That was about the only person under her that she respected. Status and money were the most important to her parents. Her brother, who had a thing with my sister, is more like Saida where they don't care about any of that. At least their kids turned out normal.
Kailey, not being far behind us, parked her car next to Saida's in her family's garage. We headed inside saying hi to Jeremy and pre-warning him about my mother's emotional state. This is something he was used to by this point and expected nothing less when he went home. Thankfully Jeremy wasn't anything like my mother and thrilled to see how far I've come. My mom was such a sap.
Passing through, we made it up to the third floor of her house, yes it had 3 floors. That was when she decided to hit us with her prom plans. They weren't too shocking, but a lot to take in. Especially knowing I'd have to be around her mother for this to happen. There's no way my mom would go for this as she wasn't too keen on her either. If this is what she wanted, then I'm willing to suck it up.
"Did I mention how great your mom is?" Kailey asked. She loved the idea of going dress shopping.
Saida clapped her hands. "I know we don't have the theme yet, but I figured this would be the perfect way to be color-coordinated for our picture." She says, before turning to me. "You're okay with this right?"
I nod even though secretly I hate it. "Yeah...yeah it's smart actually." I couldn't help but lie.
"Theme aside, did you and Issac decide how you're going to show up to prom?" Kailey had to ask that.
It's bad enough they were together but listening to them plan out their relationship was triggering. I know it's ridiculous of me to get bent out of shape. At least if Mason were here they could stir the conversation to something else. I'm not interested in knowing what expensive vehicle Issac's parents were going to rent out for a one-night occurrence. Or about how they were going to slow dance to the first romantic song that is played. That was great for them but not for me. My ears rather listen to anything else.
Fortunately, Saida didn't have an adequate answer to give her. She seemed upset by the question more than anything. The way she quietly sat on her bed with this glazed look in her eyes had me perturbed. Whenever she had the chance to talk about Issac she never passed on the opportunity. Her voice became giddy, her eyes filled with unprecedented joy, and the look on her face couldn't be denied. Something was going on between them but she wouldn't say what.
Fiddling with her fingers, she pushed a loose strand of hair behind her ear before answering. "Well...not exactly." She says, "he doesn't seem as interested as I thought he'd be."
I scoffed. "Is he ever interested in anything other than himself?" I asked sarcastically. Now wasn't the time to be so blunt but it's true.
Kailey rolled her eyes in annoyance. "He's a Hayes Summer, of course, he's set in his ways." She didn't disagree. "But they're perfect for each other. Do you know who's in line to win best couple? They are!"
Her argument was mute. Being voted best couple didn't mean they were the best couple. Saida deserved someone attentive to all her needs. Not just when it was convenient for them, but every day. I don't remember the last time she even talked about going out on a date with him. If he wasn't wrapped up in football, or trying to outdo me, he was off partying with no regard to if Saida wanted to spend time with him. That's a far stretch from being the best couple. Probably the best at being distant if an award truly mattered.
I may have shot myself in the foot opening my mouth like that. Saida looked at me with worry in her eyes. Like I said, my opinion meant a lot to her. If she felt that my feelings were off about Issac, she'd start to question herself. The last thing I wanted was to try to sway her views on him. She needed to come to that conclusion on her own. As much as it'll be easier for me to confess, if she were happy then I'm happy too. Saida is still my friend above all else.
Standing, Saida grabbed my hands, looking up at me with a worried glint in her eyes. "You...you don't think Issac is right for me?" She questioned.
Realizing what I had started, I switched my tune to a more positive outlook. "That's not what I meant," I say. "As his girlfriend, you have the right to demand more of his time. That's all."
Kailey sighed. "I suppose, but Saida, you've had a crush on him for a long time. Be happy that your mother was able to pull some strings." Her ideology was all the way fucked up.
Saida pursed her lips listening to what we both said. Neither of our answers made her happy. Kailey was pretty much telling her to be grateful. While I told her Issac is a shitty boyfriend. Had her mother not forced the relationship, maybe it could have been a lot healthier. I also don't know what they're like when it's just them 2 alone. For all we know they might have some things in common that we're just not seeing.
Hard conversations were never fun for Saida, so classically, she dropped the subject. I didn't blame her with Kailey and my horrendous perspectives. We needed to be better at considering how that may make her feel in the long run. Though we both had our agendas to fulfill.
"I'm starving, let's go beg Jeremy to make us dinner," she says with a bright smile. It was nothing like masking your pain to get by.
You have to give it to her; she was good at making us completely forget what we were talking about beforehand. This is supposed to be a sleepover.