The forest floor once more crunched underneath my feet as I made my way back to the duchy.
Leaving Ashe had been much harder than I thought it would be. In the end, he was the one who had to pull away and make me leave. Forcing my legs to move away from him had been painful, and I had looked back three times to get one more glimpse of him before leaving. There's no telling when I'll be able to see him again. So, I wanted the moment to last as long as possible.
I strode up to the large boulder that rested on the edge of the clearing. The large, open patch of grass was hidden by surrounding oak and birch trees. While the mansion is just past the trees on the other side, it can barely be seen through them. This made the clearing the perfect spot to get away from everyone, and, for that reason, it has become my retreat of sorts. I've never seen anyone else wander here. So, I often come here during the day whenever I need to take a break from the stuffiness of the mansion. At first, I was worried that I'd get in trouble for lingering in this place, but Jonie assured me that it was fine. Now and then, I bring a blanket here to lie on and watch the clouds drift by. It's one of the many things I do to forget about the bad things I face regularly.
But it's hard to forget the scars that mar this body and the person who inflicted them. It's difficult to forget a world that used to be my home and to stop missing it. The emptiness in my stomach is so loud, that it won't let me forget that I'm being starved. The stress of planning to run away refuses to rest in the backburner of my mind.
And it's impossible to ignore a prophecy that foretells your death.
So, I jumped when I had I heard the shuffling of feet that were not my own. I was hardly halfway through the clearing and began to panic, and my body completely stilled.
Why would anybody be out here this late at night?
My eyes darted around, but I didn't see anyone. And after a few minutes of stark silence, I loosed a breath. As I continued forward, I figured that it must have been a rabbit or another small animal. More than once, my heart has stopped over a squirrel.
Making it to the forest's edge, I felt relieved.
I'm just nervous. It's been a while since I've snuck out, but I'll get used to it again.
And I was thinking that very thought when something... or someone, rather, grabbed my arm and yanked me hard to the ground. I yelped, stumbling to my hands and knees in shock.
"Where the hell have you been?" An enraged, low voice asked me.
In horror, I watched two feet move in front of me.
No. No, no, no...
If Andreas has caught me here, then I'm as good as dead.
So, I was surprised – and slightly grateful – when I looked up to find a very angry-faced Keelan looking down at me. His white hair gleamed softly in the moonlight, but his eyes were as sharp and cold as ice. A pink light, a magic light, emanated from his hand, and he wore a dark green cloak with gold details that draped from his shoulders down to his ankles.
Why he wears clothes that don't suit him, I'll never understand.
What is he doing here? And how did he catch me?
"I-I..." My mouth turned to dust as I tried to think of an excuse, but it was pretty obvious where I'd been. My too-casual outfit, worn leather bag, and the fact that I'd been prancing through the forest made it extremely clear.
"Okay, if that question is too difficult to answer, then let me ask you this," he said gruffly and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Why in Tarareahn, have you been running a thrift stand at the night market?"
"What?" I asked.
"You heard me," he said dryly.
"How long have you known?" I asked in a serious tone and swallowed. "How long have you known?"
"So, you don't deny it," He exasperated.
I said nothing in reply. There isn't any point in denying it anyway.
"Since tonight, when I had sensed you leaving," he said after the pause while staring me down. "My magic tipped me off that someone had crossed over the border tonight. You know, the protective border I put up around the mansion this week? The one to keep you safe!" He shouted before sighing. "The only ones who can go through the barrier are the Howell family and the guards," he said and ran a hand through his hair.
"I was worried about your safety, so I assigned some of my knights to detail you," I groaned at his words, but he ignored me. "I gave them invisibility brooches, so you couldn't have known," he said with the pink light tinging his cheeks.
I was floored by his breach of my privacy. Especially when I'd respected his. So many times, I'd asked him different questions about magic, and I walked away every single time he refused to answer one. I never pried into the matter any further out of respect for his soul tie to the Mage Tower. But he couldn't let me have one secret of my own? It pisses me off.
Also, was I really that careless? The book had mentioned the border, but I thought it had been created after Isolde arrived. But I'd known that security had tightened, and it would have been an honest mistake if Jonie hadn't known about the new border. Still, I usually double-checked everything... I should have known, but I've been so distracted by my desire to see Ashe...
I hate being ignorant.
"At first, I figured that you were doing it for a thrill." He laughed nervously. "Then a knight spotted you with that... commoner," he spat. "He raced back here just to tell me. So, I sent him back to gather more intel. Imagine my surprise when he found your name listed on an account at a local bank. Like you even need it."
My stomach churned. "How did you even get that information?" I seethed, not quite caring that I was admitting to it. "Not only is the bank closed, but those accounts are private."
Keelan coldly laughed again. "Your blindness to the power of the Howell name still surprises me. Getting information like that was child's play."
"How. Did. You. Know?" I asked through grit teeth.
"Why the hell are you sneaking out, Adaliah? And with a commoner?" He spat. His voice was cold now. "You're lucky my guards didn't see his face. They said the alley you were... with him it was too dark. Otherwise, I would have him arrested and beheaded for touching you."
"Because I hate it here!" I yelled at him. "I'd rather live as a commoner for the rest of my life than be here!" I started crying as my dream, the light, was slowly slipping away from me.
His eyes widened. "You wanted to run away?"
I went silent in horror, realizing that I'd given more away than I thought.
Keelan's lips tightened into a straight line.
"You are doubly lucky that you chose to come home tonight. Security at the mansion is my job. If you had decided to run away under my watch, do you know what Father would do?" He hissed. "He'd scold me first for my incompetence. Then he would hunt you down," he said in a low voice before an intentional pause. "We would Hunt. You. Down."
Whatever peace had been between us this last year is surely gone now.
"I'm well aware that the duke would try hunting me down, but I have a pretty good plan. He would never find me," I hissed back. "I'm not stupid."
"Oh, because Nordia is so far away?" He snapped. "You seriously believe that we wouldn't find you? That we wouldn't risk crossing kingdoms to retrieve you? Hah," his hand went to his head, disbelief in his eyes. "You may not be stupid, but you are certainly naïve."
I stiffened. He knew.
"How...." I breathed.
"It was just a guess. You've asked me a ton of questions about the place."
Ugh, I really had been careless. I knew the risk of asking him those questions, but Keelan has traveled to Nordia once before. He's the only one who knows the kingdom well enough to feed me the kind of information that I couldn't find in the textbooks that I'd read.
"Is that why you asked me all of those questions about magic too? Were you looking for a weapon or an artifact to protect you?"
"No, I just..." My voice trailed off, my eyes turning away from his. "I just wanted to get away. I have no desire to continue playing the role of a perfect daughter."
It's not like I could have told him that I was being abused. Or better yet, that I'd fallen into earthea and possessed his sister's body while she'd been eaten by a beautiful monster.
Yeah, I bet that'd go over really well.
He shook his head. "Do you believe that running away would solve all of your problems?"
"No," I said softly. "I don't think it would solve all of my problems. Hell, it might even create new ones, but at least I'd be free," I said and tried to steady myself by remembering my daydreams of teaching in Nordia.
That was one of my motivations for leaving: to make a difference in the lives of the children who can't afford an education. Honestly, I don't have a clue about how to open up a public school, but I'm determined to figure it out. All children deserve a free education and a chance to make something of themselves... including poor, commoner children.
I don't want to watch another kid beaten for trying to feed his family.
"Free?" He moved his free hand and gently put it under my chin, tilting my head up to look at him more directly. "None of us could ever be free from our duties as children of Howell. You especially, could never be free." He spat. "We could never let you go so easily."
I slapped his hand away. "What are you talking about? The man you call father has never cared for me! He ought to be happy that I want to leave!" I yelled.
"That man," he emphasized angrily, "Whether you like it or not, has an agreement with the Igorian Council and King Orson involving you."
"What in Tarareahn are you – "
"The agreement is a promise of marriage between the daughter of Howell and the crown prince!" He stepped forward, and the hand I had pushed away was now clenched into a fist.
I paused. "Huh?" I asked confused.
"That means you stupid!" He yelled back at me, and the pink light in his hand grew brighter in his fury. "You are to be engaged to his highness, Prince Khol!"
I blinked at him, trying to process his words. The ridiculous words that I couldn't make myself believe. Because I really can't believe it.
I started laughing like a crazy person.
"Oh, that's rich," I said while waving him off.
"You think I'm joking?" He asked with wide eyes.
"Hah, I know you're joking," I said and pointed at him. "But you're not very creative with your threats," I sneered. "You must be very scared that I will disappear if you feel the need to stoop this low. I guess that you don't want to take time tracking me down if I do run. Not that you would find me... even if I did leave for Nordia and - hey!" I squeaked as he roughly grabbed my shoulder. His eyes narrowed.
"As much as I wouldn't want to waste time bringing you back home - because you and I both know that I would," he assured me. "I'm only telling you the truth. Why else would I threaten to have your lover arrested and killed?"
"Because you're a spiteful boy with nothing better to do than pick on your younger sister," I raged, wishing I could punch him.
"No!" He yelled and then groaned with frustration. "Because you," he said and coughed awkwardly. "Your innocence must be kept safe. Don't you understand how advantageous this marriage would be? What it would mean for the Howell dukedom?"
His words began to sink in, making me feel bitter.
No, I'm not just bitter. I'm angry. There is a rage inside of me that I feel for the real Adaliah, who had to put up with this trash. I don't care if she did want to marry Khol. I'm angry that every choice that should have been hers was taken away from her.
So, Andreas promised his daughter's hand to Khol? But which daughter was never specified since Adaliah was believed to be the only one, which only makes the situation worse. Maybe it explains why Adaliah had been so possessive of Khol. He'd been promised to her first. I hadn't known, but maybe she was told around this time before the story took place. Granted, I bet she was told under better circumstances.
It also explains why Andreas did so much for Isolde in the original novel. He must have decided that she would marry Khol instead. When Isolde arrived in the story, the duke practically showered her with gifts and attention. She is the powerful, lovely daughter that looks like him. The daughter who brought good fortune and fame to the dukedom.
Adaliah had no magic, and her appearance sparked scandalous rumors that she was also an illegitimate daughter, being the product of the late duchess's secret affair. It's my one guess as to why Andreas hates Adaliah. So, why did he allow the engagement between Adaliah and Khol? While Isolde is illegitimate, she's the daughter of the duke. If Adaliah was found out to be illegitimate, then it would be worse for her as the daughter of the late duchess and another man.
The agreement with the council must be the reason why it was so easy for Isolde, an illegitimate daughter, to marry the crown prince. Since there had been a formal agreement, the Igorian Council must have been forced to follow through with it. No one would have thought twice about the change – especially after the execution of the original bride.
"I don't want to marry the prince," I said through clenched teeth. "And I'm done talking to you about this," I said, standing up before brushing the dirt and grass off of my pants. For once, I'd gotten too much information out of Keelan – enough to satisfy me for a while.
I walked past him before looking over my shoulder and saying, "Now, if you'll excuse me." Then I began walking back towards the clearing. I wouldn't cross the border, but I don't want to go back to my cage right now.
I heard him mumble something, but I ignored it. I was too angry to listen. So, I was shocked when both of my arms were grabbed by two guards. I began thrashing around, but I couldn't get free.
I hate this. I hate being weak. I hate being Adaliah Howell.
"Turn her to face me please," Keelan commanded.
The two men, covered head to toe in metal armor, twisted me around to face the mage. Once I had been turned around, the men held me there. I tried ripping my arms away, but they held them firmly. They were pressing so tightly, that I knew I'd have fresh bruises tomorrow.
Using his magic, Keelan levitated towards me. I'd seen him do it plenty of times before, but it's still strange to watch. While mages can't fly like those with a wind affinity, they can levitate a few feet in the air. But I've read that it's a very difficult skill to master as it's easy to lose control.
"I'm not telling father about this because I don't need him to believe I'm incompetent," he spat the last word. "From here on out, you will not be allowed to leave the duchy without an escort. If you try, then I will find you and throw you into the dungeon. Do I make myself clear?"
Wait. Does this place have an actual dungeon?
I gaped at him. "I'm not allowed to leave anyway! Why do you think I snuck out?" I seethed. My room was as good as a dungeon anyway... albeit a comfy one.
He ignored me, looking at the two soldiers who were pinning me to their sides.
His feet floated back to the ground as he said, "Take her to her room. I want two guards posted at her door and two below her balcony. Make sure she has an escort when she leaves her room from now on. It can be one of you or a maid, but she should never be left alone. I will relay this to Maid Grellace myself."
"Yes, sir!" The two men responded enthusiastically.
I wonder if they are enjoying this.
Keelan turned his gaze towards me, and I dropped my head. I refused to look him in the eye. He's taking away my one chance at freedom. Denying me the only thing I've wanted since falling into this place.
"You'll regret this," I huffed.
But the white-haired mage didn't answer me. Instead, he dramatically whipped around and walked towards the mansion. His dark green cape flowed behind him.
When he was out of sight, I tried squirming out of the guard's grasp, but it was no use. There would be no running away now. No trips to the market. No more late-night kisses and comfort... at least, not anytime soon. Isolde will appear, and the original storyline will begin.
And I'm going to be a part of it whether I like it or not.
After the guards shut my bedroom door, I hit it repeatedly while screaming. No one could hear me always. Andreas had someone enchant this room with silencing magic. Anything that happens in here can't be heard by anyone outside of the room when the doors are closed.
When my hands became sore, I crawled away and cried on the floor for a while. At one point, Jonie had tried to come in, but I sent her away. I couldn't face her right now.
In the hour after that, I screamed and cried some more until my voice was hoarse. I picked up random things and threw them across the room. I threw a real tantrum, just like the real Adaliah had in the novel. And I let myself act that way. With everything I've been through in the past year, I deserved this one small moment to lose my sanity.
For once, I was grateful that the room was enchanted to be soundproof.
It was almost dawn when I finally calmed myself down, and I was exhausted. But I needed time to let that anger boil over because it helped me to realize something: being caught this one time doesn't mean I should accept my fate here. The story hasn't started yet. There's still time for me to change that destiny.
"I guess it's time for a new plan," I concluded as I sat down at my desk.
First, I need to write a letter to Ashe. I'll explain what had happened and have Jonie deliver it to him. She would have to visit the city soon and could give it to him then.
My heart ached at the thought of being away from him again.
Fortunately for me, Ashe and I do have a backup plan. We had made it right after I finalized our original plan. We decided that if I was ever caught trying to run away, instead of Nordia, we would buy a boat and sail to the other side of earthea to a small kingdom called Miriand. It's rumored to be a beautiful, extravagant place where refugees and criminals sometimes flee. Ashe had always dreamed of sailing across the world, and I shared that sentiment. And I decided that if things boiled down to this plan, I'd sail as far away as possible, which makes Miriand the perfect destination.
This plan was almost our first one. But after realizing the risks of sailing that far, we chose to put it away as a backup plan in case Nordia didn't work out. We silently promised that we would follow this plan if the first one failed.
Again, I wasn't about to involve myself in another stupid tie.
Yes, when the timing is right, I would run. Not stopping at Nordia. No, I'd take that boat and sail far, far away from this place. Ashe and I would find a new life in Miriand.
I took off my pants and threw the tunic over my head before changing into a nightgown. Then I stashed the clothes and leather bag underneath the loose floorboard that was hidden under the rug beside my bed. I'd been storing my runaway items here for a while. Sugar and salt were hidden in tins. A few changes of clothes were folded and stored in a pack. Maps and other necessary items were stowed there as well.
I bought these things from the market recently. It's probably another reason why Ashe thought I was ready to go. But really, I'd bought them anxiously. Preparing to run away isn't exactly new to me. Just like before, I want to make sure that I'm doing everything carefully. That I'm being smart in gathering things together.
Unfortunately, I hadn't accounted for the magic in this world to betray me.
As I waited for sleep to overtake me, I began thinking of how I should deal with Isolde's arrival. I'd been hoping to avoid it, praying that I could leave the moment her name slipped from someone's lips that weren't my own. For months I've checked newspapers, trying to figure out an exact timeframe for her arrival. I thought that a great anodyne like herself would have her name plastered on the front page of the paper, but there were only articles about the squabbles in the country villages.
Well, whenever she gets here, I need to be the kindest and most selfless person possible.
To make matters more difficult, my reputation among the nobility is riddled with all kinds of rumors. My legitimacy as the duke's daughter is only one of them. There are rumors so well-crafted that, being a reader of the novel, had thought they were true. It wasn't until I possessed this body that I found out they were lies.
As soon as Isolde steps past the mansion's gate, she'll be warned about me – no matter how much progress I've made in a year. If I can't convince her of my true nature, then I'm doomed. I'll have to win her over if I want to survive this story.
It doesn't even make sense to me. How could someone who's kept locked away be gossiped about? I understand that I'm the daughter of the duke, so gossip is going to come along with that... but all of it is bad gossip. Not a lick of it is positive.
The only explanation that I could come up with, is that someone is deliberately spreading lies about me. I'm not sure who, and I'm not sure why. What I do know, is if I'm forced to stick around long enough, then I'll find the person or people responsible for it. And do... something about it, I guess.
I groaned as my hands went to my head. It's an annoying problem to have, but it isn't the most important one right now. The rumors and their perpetrator can wait. Right now, my overall reputation doesn't matter either. I only need to focus on Isolde's perception of me.
My simple idea to be kind, which I'd come up with nearly a year ago, is the plan I'll continue to follow. Treating Isolde with kindness ought to help change things to some extent.
In the original novel, Andreas throws Isolde a grand birthday party for her eighteenth birthday. Adaliah, jealous of Isolde, tries tossing wine onto Isolde's dress. Graced with luck, Isolde is rescued by Khol, who intervened just in time. Adaliah ended up leaving the party, as the crown prince made a scene to embarrass her.
Changing this part of the story would be easy. First of all, I would never pour a drink on Isolde. Even if I did want to hurt Isolde, throwing a drink at her is child's play. There are much more satisfying ways and safer ways to vent anger.
Unlike Adaliah, I would never take revenge on anyone. By nature, I'm not a violent person. When Wyatt stumbled into my house, the hit I got on him was lucky. I have no idea how I would hurt someone, especially with a body like this. I'm not strong enough to fight, and I don't have magic to scare people into submission. Even if I had those things, I wouldn't risk being executed. Taking revenge would be pointless.
The one thing that still concerns me about making changes to the story is the concept of the butterfly effect. One small change could affect the rest of the story – and not necessarily change it for good either. Unlike Earth, earthea might have magic, but over the years, I've begun to understand that this place has many of the same principles of science that my world has. So, when I do make changes to the future of this world, I need to make them carefully.
That is if I want the future to be a happy one.