Elena had never felt so torn before. It was baffling to her how someone who barely knew her could understand or perceive so much just by looking into her eyes. She lay in bed, tossing and turning, unable to shake the memory of the unsettling encounter from a few hours earlier. It was well past midnight, yet sleep eluded her, her mind consumed by the moments when she had felt uneasy and vulnerable under the scrutiny of a stranger. A persistent knot in her stomach refused to dissipate, like a rollercoaster of discomfort churning inside her. With a heavy sigh, she cast aside the thick blanket and sat upright against the headboard, drawing her knees close to her chest.
"I'm exhausted from all this overthinking! My mind is drained and overwhelmed by the constant stream of thoughts," she uttered wearily, her hands moving to her head in frustration. As Elena grappled with her inner turmoil in Kelan's room, he found himself in a similar predicament. Struggling to find sleep, he attempted to immerse himself in a book, hoping to divert his mind from unwanted thoughts. The soft glow of the lamp beside the couch provided just enough light to read, until he reached page 222 and was startled by the sound of a creaking door. Looking up, he was taken aback by Elena's sudden presence in the room, emerging from the shadows on the far left.
Setting his book aside, Kelan watched Elena as she made her way to the living room. With a shy smile, she tiptoed across the small space, her eyes meeting his. Returning her smile, Kelan gestured for her to join him on the couch. Elena giggled softly, sinking down onto the plush cushions beside him.
"You couldn't sleep either, huh?" Kelan murmured softly, his affectionate gaze lingering on Elena's gentle expression that stirred his heart. He found himself captivated by the myriad of facets she revealed, deepening the attachment he felt towards her. Suddenly, he noticed her head shake slightly in response.
"I...I...couldn't sleep because... I felt bad," Elena murmured, her voice barely above a whisper, as she pulled her legs up from the cold floor and crossed them together. Kelan smiled in understanding, giving her his full attention.
"I wanted to say sorry... for my behavior earlier! I shouldn't have spoken to you the way I did, especially after all the kindness you've shown me," Elena expressed with a pleading gaze that brought a smile to Kelan's eyes.
"It's okay... you don't have to apologize. I shouldn't have pressured you to talk about things you're not comfortable discussing," Kelan replied. Elena gazed into his sincere eyes, finding them to be mirrors of the soul. She could feel the weight of his distress following her earlier rudeness. Moving closer, she reached out and took his right hand.
"It's not that I'm not comfortable with you, I don't know what it is, but I feel so good and content when I'm with you," Elena shared, her voice filled with honesty and warmth.
"Since that day in the cabin, I've been feeling like I don't want to mess this up like I do with everything else in my life," Elena confessed, her voice carrying a sudden note of sorrow. Kelan felt a tightness in his chest as he observed her words, noticing the gradual shift in her facial expressions to one of sadness.
"No... why would you feel that way? Elena, I don't want you to think I expect anything in return for helping you. I'm not like that. I simply want to understand you and help heal the wounds that keep hurting you," Kelan spoke softly, squeezing her hand gently as he gazed earnestly into her eyes. Suddenly, tears welled up in her eyes, reflecting the pain and vulnerability she carried within.
"I don't want you to get to know the real me! I'm afraid you won't like me afterwards. I just feel like I will mess it up somehow," Elena's voice cracked as tears streamed down her face. Kelan's heart ached for her, sensing her vulnerability. Slowly but surely, he was breaking down her walls. With a sense of urgency, he leaned forward, gently cupping her cheeks in his hands.
"Look at me! Nothing you say or do will ever make me not like you! Nobody is perfect, Elena. And I know I certainly am not either. But I want you to understand that I genuinely mean it when I say you can trust me, as your friend," Kelan spoke with unwavering eyes, ensuring she heard his words. Elena sniffled softly, her gaze dropping to his lips. Fascination washed over her as she observed them from such close proximity.
"Is that what we are? Just friends?" Elena murmured, her question lingering in the air as she tilted her gaze back to his eyes. Kelan's jaw tensed as he delved into his thoughts, grappling with the realization that friends weren't supposed to feel or kiss like they had. He released a short breath, his hands retreating back to his knees.
"Yes, I suppose so," he answered unconvincingly, trying to maintain a slight distance from her. Then, unexpectedly, her words slipped out.
"Kiss me," she whispered, gazing at him. Kelan gasped slightly in disbelief, shaking his head slowly.
"No, I shouldn't do that, Elena," he muttered, meeting her gaze. Elena bit her lip in frustration, shaking her head in defiance. Ignoring his words, she pulled herself on his lap. Kelan found himself unable to resist, as deep down, this was something he had longed for as well, even in his wildest dreams.
"Kelan, please... I know you feel it too! Your blood boiling at the thought of kissing each other so passionately," she whispered, her seductive eyes inches away from his lips as she cradled his face in her hands. Then the inevitable happened, she didn't have to tell him thrice, he surged forward to meet her wanting lips and grabbed her hips as she started grinding down on him.
"Ah!..Mhh!" She moaned when she felt him hardening under her and he swiftly took the opportunity to slide his tongue against hers, it was frantic and passionate. His hands quickly were pulling her blouse off and cupped her tits when they came into view, realizing a bit late that she didn't have any bra on. Anxiously he pulled away from the kiss.
"N-no! Elena... I can't do this," he uttered between ragged breaths, struggling to maintain control. Elena narrowed her eyes at him, puzzled by his sudden change of heart.
"What do you mean you can't?" she asked, staring into his fearful eyes with deep puzzlement. Kelan focused on her face, noticing the offense slowly creeping into her expression.
"Elena, I... I just can't take advantage of you. You're not thinking straight, you're probably really emotional right now," he explained, showing utmost concern for her well-being. Elena couldn't believe what she was hearing. For the first time, a man was refusing to indulge her advances. Slowly, she turned her face away, trying to process his words.
"I'm not pretty enough for you? Is that why you're rejecting me right now?" she blurted out suddenly, locking eyes with his confused expression.
"What!? No, no, that's not what I'm saying at all! Please, just listen to me. I simply cannot kiss you and touch you like I just did because I'm not that kind of man,"
"We all know what comes next, and I refuse to take any chances!" he uttered in a serious tone, holding her face to look directly at him. Elena was utterly bewildered and lost by his revelation. She slowly moved away from him, getting to her feet and grabbing her blouse nearby. Kelan sighed deeply, rubbing his face in despair at the situation. His eyes followed her every move as she finally interacted with him again.
"What kind of man are you then, Kelan? Explain it to me better because you're confusing me!" she raised her voice in frustration, pacing aimlessly in front of him. Kelan swiftly stood up, grasping her wrists to halt her restless movements as if she was on the verge of losing control.
"I'm not the kind of man to sleep with someone on the first day of knowing them. I'm not the one to make love to someone I haven't recognized as my significant other. I'm not the type of man who engages in one-night stands for pleasure alone. If I ever make love to someone, it's because I want to be with that person and because I know they feel the same about me," he stated firmly, staring at her as she looked back at him with wide eyes. He wasn't one to take sex lightly like others who viewed it as a casual activity. To him, it was the ultimate sacred act of love.