[POV: Andreanna Saunterre]
You know, for a second there I thought I being a little overdramatic about the whole... boy plus hygiene thing.
I was not dramatic.
Not in the slightest.
"Oscar, please keep to your side of the room!" I said, again, kicking another item of clothing from my side onto his. Though we had divided the room evenly, somehow Oscar still managed to traipse his stuff over onto my side. Why does he need to take everything out of his suitcase? It's one night, I thought, shaking my head and preparing for the next sock, shirt or shoe that would inevitably land on my half of the room.
It was bordering 11pm and I wasn't feeling tired at all. The opposite, actually; I was far too awake. Up until this point, Oscar and I had had things to occupy us. First, it was the bike meet - which was everything I wanted and more, by the way - then, it was the (slight) argument, then it was trying to find a place to have dinner. But now, it was just the matter of... you know, going to sleep, and all that.
Which, normally, would've been the highlight of my night if it wasn't for the glaring presence of a boy.
The hyperawareness that I was sharing my space with a boy was biting at me. It's literally Oscar, I kept telling myself. Oscar, who is not on drugs. Oscar, who's middle name is Jack. I almost laughed, but managed to keep it in.
If he's not a morning person, I gather he's definitely a night person then? That's normally how it goes, right? Love going to sleep, hate waking up. I rambled on in my head, trying to make as much noise mentally as I could to distract myself from how awkwardly quiet the room was. Except for Oscar's loud rummaging, of course. Hold on...
"What're you even looking for, Oscar?" I asked, realizing that he'd been searching around in his suitcase for several minutes.
"I can't find..." He said, struggling, "I think I've forgotten my sleeping mask."
"You... use a sleeping mask?"
"Yes, Andi." He turned to face me, "I use a sleeping mask."
"Hey, I wasn't making fun! I use one too, sometimes. When hotels don't have dark enough curtains. Don't you hate that? When they barely darken the place? It's basically like leaving a light on— what's the point?!" I kept going until I saw that Oscar was staring at me with raised eyebrows and was nodding along to what I was saying, not amused. I wondered why, and gathered that I was just listing all the reasons he brought a sleeping mask. Or, was supposed to bring a sleeping mask...
I laughed awkwardly, "You can use mine." I said quickly. "If you want." I got up from my bed and retrieved it, handing it to him. At first, he gladly accepted it, before he saw what it looked like. He stared at the mask in his hands for a good while before looking back up at me.
"Really?" He said, turning it around and showing me my own mask. I looked at it, with it's two closed cartoon eyes that had thick lashes and sparkly eyeshadow on them.
"You don't want it? Fine. I think these curtains are at least 75% blacked out, so—"
"Yes, fine, it's fine—" He sighed, "Thank you."
Then, it was quiet again. Once we'd both gotten settled into bed it was even quieter. I felt awkward; like I had to say something.
"What was your favourite bike?" I asked, on a whim.
It took a while, but he said: "Uh... there was a nice orange one that I saw—"
"Mine was the Triumph, definitely."
"Yeah, that one was cool. I liked that one, too."
After another beat of silence, I once again felt the need to speak.
"Second favourite bike?"
He sighed, and I immediately regretted everything I'd ever done in my life up until that point.
(Okay... slightly overdramatic...)
"You don't have to ask me all this, you know." He said sleepily, "You don't have to fill these silences."
He was right, obviously. I fidgeted with my fingernails and bit my tongue. I managed to last in the silence for a while, but...
"So... how's racing going?"
I heard him roll over, "Okay, now you're reaching—"
"No, seriously!" I defended myself, "I actually do want to know." I said, still fidgeting with my hands. "I remember my first season in MotoGP; I don't think I breathed for the entire 9 months." I said, truthfully.
He chuckled, clearly nodding off, "I mean, yeah. I guess that sums it up."
Is he just going to agree with everything I say?
I sighed, still not feeling an ounce of tiredness. "You don't seem stressed. Like, at all. It's weird, especially since I know now that you're not on Xanax." I joked; all I got back was a laugh, no response.
"I wish I was like that." I said, accepting my fate of not being answered. I therefore got comfier in my bed and prepared to try and sleep. "I remember the media being all over how stressed I looked the entire season. I can't hide that; My face exposes me."
"Yeah, I know."
I turned my head to his direction instantly.
"What's that supposed to mean?" I questioned him, surprised he said anything at all.
"With Charles." His words were spread out - clearly, he wasn't really paying attention to what was being said and was just speaking his mind, too tired to think properly. Unless, I thought, he's the type to get super truthful at night.
"When? I haven't even been around him that much, especially not with you there." I said.
"Yeah, that's—" he yawned, "the point." He exhaled deeply. I assumed he was done with the conversation, so I turned onto my side, facing the wall. But he wasn't done; "Whenever he's there, you make a face and run away," he said.
My eyebrows scrunched together, trying to remember back to times where he could've seen me do just then. Before long, I realised I'd done it quite a lot in his presence. Shit, I thought, I thought I was getting better at the whole 'not being completely and totally obvious' thing.
I didn't really know what to say next. Again, he was right. How does he do that? Is it the tiredness talking, or do I actually— I held my eyes shut for a little too long, unable to get them open without consciously trying. I brought my legs up higher as I was still on my side; trying to get warmer.
After a while, I thought of something.
"Bad habit, I guess." I closed my eyes again.
This time, I let the silence last. I didn't feel the need to say anything more, since I neither knew what to say nor wanted to say anything at all.
Oh, fuck. I suddenly thought. Something had slipped my mind.
I hope he doesn't snore.
"Andi?" I heard my name come from the other side of the room, unexpectedly.
"Hm?" I mumbled, wondering if I actually heard anything at all since it was so quiet.
"Do you really think all this is going to work?" Oscar said.
Guess it's his turn to ask all the questions, huh?
I thought about it for a while. I began biting my nails again.
"Yeah." I said, "I do. It's gonna work." I brought my legs up even higher and closed my eyes even tighter. I stopped myself from biting my nails and placed my hand below my head so that I wouldn't be able to do it unconsciously. I took a deep breath.
"I know it will."
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Hhehehe the busiest school term OF MY LIFE is overrrr so you know what that means.. 🤭
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Also, can we just get a round of applause for Oscar GETTING P4 IN THE AUS GP???!!!