✧𝙽𝚘𝚊𝚑✧
"Cameron! Let's go. We're late." I call out as I hastily pour what's left in my mug into a theromos to take to work with me.
"Coming!" Cameron calls back. I head off down the hall to make sure he actually is. He's in the middle of stomping his shoe the rest of the way on. When it is, he grabs his little backpack off his bed from beside Gus and rushes over.
"Go wait by the door." I dismiss him. He's already walking around me. "Hey, princess, we're heading out now." I warn as I approach the bathroom where she's still getting ready. Just as I walk into the doorway, she steps away from the sink, dropping her straightener even though she wasn't finished straightening a chunk of her hair. I grimace a little when she quickly collects her hair to hold it out of her face while she doubles over the toilet. "Okay," I whisper as I step further in to hold her hair back for her. I hold it in one hand, using the other to rub her back.
When she's done, she flushes the toilet and pops right up like it never happened. "Okay, love you. See you after work." She hums casually.
I back up as soon as she steps a little closer. "Uh-huh," I lean in quick just to kiss her cheek. She scoffs at me while I do.
"I wasn't going to kiss you."
"Didn't want to take any chances." I shrug her off and take a step back out of the room. She shakes her head with a little smile and reaches over for her toothbrush. She's brushed her teeth a number of times already this morning. "All right, love you." I hum as I quickly head back down the hall.
"Wait,"
I backtrack immediately. "Hm?"
She holds out my thermos that I set aside once I came into the bathroom to hold her hair back. "You forgot this." She smiles.
I smile back and reach out for it. "Thanks."
"Bye." She calls after me as I turn and jog down the hall to meet Cameron by the door. Gus barks at me as I pass the bedroom where he's still lazily sleeping. He hates it when we run in the house.
__________
I think it's pretty obvious that most people hate going to work. Even those people who have their dream jobs. I doubt they all wake up in the morning just buzzing with excitement to work. At some point, you'd have to get tired of it, right?
I don't have my dream job though. I have a normal job. I can't really say everyone hates their jobs since I don't know what it's like to have your dream one, so I'm going to stick with saying the majority of people hate their jobs.
I hate mine, but I go every morning to get it done. Not because I want to, and not even because I get paid for it. Mostly because now and days, coming home from work is the highlight of my day. I always liked coming home to sleep, even before Kiara and Cameron. But now I'm not excited to sleep. I'm excited for all the other stuff. The fun stuff.
It's just me and Cam for a few hours when I get off of work. Today, we spend it going to see a movie in the theater. A kid's one, of course. Animated with those random bursts of songs and choreography that everyone and their mom just somehow know.
I don't know. When we get out of the movie, Cameron says he loved it so I guess that's all that really matters about it.
It's nice to spend quality time with him during those couple hours we have together before his mom joins us, is what I'm saying. He's getting older, and I know there will be a few years there where he won't even be able to look at me without making a sour face and groaning at me for embarrassing the hell out of him. Which I will be doing. Can't say future Cameron is wrong for the groaning.
For now though, my son beams up at me and tells me he loves me when I reluctantly agree to go get ice cream with him under the condition that he doesn't say a word to his mom about it. Not because he hasn't even had dinner yet, but because ice cream now makes her sick. Strawberry ice cream, to be exact. I feel bad for her every time Cameron asks for some.
He takes my hand and holds it as we cross the street to the ice cream place, and he only lets go once we're back on the sidewalk so he can run over and open the door. He ends up opening it for a woman and her daughter, but plays it off as if he meant it. He gives a smile I'm quite familiar with and sharply nods to the woman when she gasps and exclaims about how much of a gentleman he is.
I shake my head with a smile as I follow him into the ice cream shop. "Thought you had a girlfriend, Nut." I murmur.
"No." He argues simply as he skips on up to the counter to look at the flavors of ice cream behind the glass.
He looks around as if he doesn't choose the same thing every time. "Hi, how can I help you?" A guy behind the counter asks while Cameron squints at the ice cream. I get two medium bowls of rocky road.
Cameron turns to me after I finish ordering. "I want rocky road." He informs, unaware that I made the decision already.
"Okay, Nut, I got it. Go find somewhere to sit."
He pivots and marches along towards an empty two seater table. I smile to myself as I watch him struggle to climb up onto the tall stool at the table. He's already complained to me about how the other boys in his class tease him about being the shortest boy. I was quick to assure him he'd have a growths spurt in a couple of years like I did, but I don't think it helped that much. He doesn't really get what that means.
I nearly laugh at the reminder of what it was like for me. Pretty much the same as him, really. I wasn't the shortest, but I wasn't the tallest. I think I was actually the second shortest boy in class until I hit fifth grade. At which point I somehow got somewhere around five six or seven. Then by middle school I was one of the taller kids in class.
"Okay," I breathe as I come up to the table with two bowls in my hands. I slide one of them to him. "So, how was school?" I ask as I take a seat in the stool across from him.
"It was okay. I got partnered with Ava again for painting."
I raise a brow. "Ava, huh?"
He shrugs and pokes at an almond in his ice cream. "She's not that mean." He decides thoughtfully.
"No? Think you could be friends with her?"
He sighs while he thinks about it. "Mm...I don't know." He eventually dismisses. "Did you have fun at work?" He moves on.
"Oh, so much fun." I nod quickly. No, today actually sucked. I got chewed out for a mistake I didn't even make.
Cameron smiles though. "That's nice." He acknowledges. I chuckle. "Today one of the sixth grade teachers left." He adds, going back to his day.
"Like, they took an early day?"
"No. She's gone." He hums casually. I stare awkwardly at him, waiting for him to clarify.
"Is...she okay?" I slowly ask when he just doesn't continue at all.
"Yeah. She's having a baby like Mom is." He finally clarifies.
"Oh, so she went on maternity leave." I nod. He shrugs me off. I chuckle and look down at my ice cream, trying to play it cool while I take the chance put in front of me.
Cameron hasn't asked any questions since we told him he was about to be a big brother. Other than asking if Mom was going to have to get new jeans again, he hasn't really asked or talked about it. We don't think he's upset—we think Kinsley would've called us into their session or told us how we can properly handle him and his emotions about it if that were the case.
He seems pretty okay with it. Indifferent. It's almost like he doesn't realize being a big brother means there's a whole other kid in the house. We reasoned with him and said it was like Elaina and Jacob. She's a big sister now, and there's a baby in the house. He said he understood what being a big brother is and got offended we thought he didn't. But...I mean, the kid just doesn't seem phased at all.
"So, uh, speaking of a baby," I begin, not even looking up from my ice cream in case I spook him. "You thought about if your new sibling is a boy or a girl?"
He scrunches his nose. "I don't know."
"What do you want it to be?"
"Um...Well, a little brother would be cool because he could play fighter with me."
"Uh—I don't think we're gonna play fighter with the baby, Nut."
"But Mom really likes Elaina. I think she wants a girl baby." He continues as if he hadn't heard me.
He's not wrong. Kiara hasn't said what she wants or what she thinks it is, but I see the way she plays with Elaina's hair. I think she'd like a daughter too. Then again, I doubt she'd be disappointed if it wasn't a girl.
"Thought about what we should name the baby?"
"Rex." He offers simply.
I squint. "What if it's a girl?"
"Rexis."
"Rexis?"
He looks at me like I'm dumb. "That's the girl part of Rex." He scoffs. I'm surprised he doesn't end his sentence with a snarky duh. "Like how you call Uncle Alex the girl part."
"What, Alexis?" I laugh. It makes sense. Rex and Rexis. Totally valid options for a baby name.
"Uh-huh,"
"Let's see what Mom says." I decide, mostly just curious to see what Kiara's face will do. She's very expressive lately for some reason. Can't quite hide her thoughts anymore.
Cameron moves on with ease. I try to force myself to accept the fact that he's simply just as okay with this as he's acting. His act never falters, and he lets himself ask a confused question here and there which is pretty normal. I guess we're just waiting for a second shoe to drop which isn't going to happen.
I make a face when Cameron makes a bit of a gross sound little kids make when they eat. Can't wait for him to grow out of that. "Are we gonna go to Great Grandma and Great Grandpa's house still?" He asks curiously, moving on with ease.
"Yeah." I hum, nodding along as if I hadn't forgotten all about it. Only a few people are going, from my understanding. I don't exactly know what their reason for this particular gathering is, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't want to go anyway. "Why? You don't wanna go?"
"I do." He's quick to insist. "I don't think Great Grandpa knows me, but Great Grandma's nice." He reasons casually.
I chuckle to myself. "They both are." I agree. I don't think my grandpa fully remembers who Cameron is every time we go, but he's nice to him nonetheless, still treating him like the rest of the grandkids.
"Are Angela and David gonna be there too?"
"Probably." I shrug. "I don't really know who all is coming." I quickly admit before he can start grilling me for the entire fucking guest list. It's sort of his thing.
"Who do you know is coming?"
I sigh deeply. "I don't know, Nut. Uh," I shake my head as I look off to the side to think. "Aunt Jenny and her family, Auntie Ally, um...I don't know—A few other cousins and people." I shrug again helplessly. "We'll see when we get there, how's that?"
He frowns, unsatisfied. He accepts it nonetheless though. "Okay." He mutters as he sadly pokes at his ice cream.
I don't understand his need to know the entire guest list when we go places, but I understand that he does have a need. So, I take a breath and weakly continue with more specifics that I do have. Or at least suspect. I offer what I can because there's no harm in it. It's not like it's this fully inconvenient thing that I'll have to go out of my way for. Even if it was, I'd do it anyway.
He's only curious, and it costs nothing to do what I can to try and soothe that curiosity. Besides, I vaguely recall being overly curious about random, mundane things when I was his age too. In some ways, I get it. I get the frustration he must feel when his curiosity can't be helped either.
As upsetting as it is for him to be left with unsatisfied curiosity, I can't help my little smile as I tell him what I know to try and help him. It's another one of those many things I find we have in common, and I always like finding those little things.
Whether they're not so great traits or not, we have it in common. They're nice little reminders that he also has some of me in him too. I just like finding all of those little traits from me hidden in the ones that are his own. He's still his own person despite having a lot of his mom and me in him.
I don't think I'll ever stop looking for these little details about him. The way he talks, the faces he makes, even his way of thinking. I already know I'll probably go the same with this new baby. It's that curiosity.