"No! P-please, tell me that's not true! It can't be!" I yelled unable to keep the tears down.
I was trapped in the basement chained once again. The silver was burning my wrists, but that was the least amount of pain I was feeling. Tears streamed down my face at a rapid pace. I struggled to pull my wrists out of the clasps. I really wish I was double jointed. I needed to be next to his side. I needed to be with him. I couldn't believe what was happening. My vision was a blurred mess, but I knew what I was seeing.
Jackson's pack invaded us this morning. Lucas ordered me to hide in the basement. He couldn't risk Jackson getting his hands on me. Lucas fought at the front line. All I could hear for hours was the growls and screams of pain until it all stopped. The world went silent. I had thought we had won. It was the exact opposite. An hour later, I saw Jackson creeping down the stairs dragging a body behind him. Lucas' body. He was dead. My father trailed along behind him. I couldn't keep my screams in. I yelled for Lucas. He couldn't be dead. I won't let him die. I need him.
My father instantly turned towards me dragging me by my collar as I yelled and kicked. They brought us into the back room. My father lets go off me in order to untangle the cables. I ran towards Lucas reaching for his hand. I felt his pulse only to find none. He had a large wound on his left side. A bite mark from Jackson. The one that killed him. I couldn't go on without him.
"Lucas! Lucas! Please come back to me! Please! I love you, Lucas! Please. Please." I yelled at him expecting a response even though deep down I knew I wouldn't get one.
Lucas dying wasn't the only pain that stung me. Jackson being right killed me. My father came to our pack to take me, faked his death and wrote me a note saying how strong I was just to make me believe that I could win this war. When in reality, I never had a chance. I'm weak from the silver, but I'm even weaker now that I've found the truth. I wanted this nightmare to end. I wanted my father to look at me in the eyes and rip out my heart. I can't fight anymore. Lucas is gone, my friends are gone, my pack is gone. I have nothing left to live for.
"Mia, Mia, Mia...I told you that you couldn't win against me. Against us. You were so caught up in your imagination that you didn't realize you lost this battle from the very beginning. You had no shot at winning. And look!" Jackson spoke sternly.
He walked over to me and lifted my face. He smashed my cheeks as he moved my face to see Lucas dead on the ground.
"You killed him," Jackson spoke violently.
"No! No! I didn't kill him!" I screamed. I couldn't have.
"But you did sister. You killed your mate."
"I didn't! You did!"
"Just think. If you didn't fall in love with that bastard then he might still be alive. You could've stayed with your family and grew up in the pack you were born to. Instead, you slept next to the enemy. We needed you back and the only way to get you back was for him to die. It was your choice. The choice you made turned out deadly."
I couldn't believe what Jackson was saying. He was right. I did kill him. I caused his death. Why do I have to hurt everyone I care about. First Nora, then Tyler, and now Lucas. I could feel myself fading away.
"Come my sweet child. I tried to save you, but it turned out fatal for us both. You were meant to be up here with me. Come now!" I heard my mother's voice speak.
This was a dream. It had to be.
"Mia? Mia? Wake up!" I heard Lucas calling.
As he spoke, he began shaking me in an attempt to wake me up. My eyes flung open at the sound of his voice. It was a dream. I was relieved for that. I instantly sat up noticing Lucas had already gotten ready for the day. His black hair was perfectly combed back. He wore a suit. Why was he wearing a suit? I wondered. "
Are you okay?!?" He asked me in concern.
"Yes...why wouldn't I be?" I said slowly.
"You were whispering that you didn't kill someone. You looked like you were about to break down in tears."
"Well, I'm fine." I shot back angrily.
Just the thought of that dream pained me. I felt like Lucas was expecting me to tell him what it was about, but I can't. I won't.
"What was your nightmare about? Jackson?" He concluded.
"Please stop!"
It was about Jackson, but I was afraid if I told him then he wouldn't let me do anything alone again. I just want to be alone right now as I figure some things out.
"Mia? What's wrong?" He began to sound more concerned.
"Stop suffocating me!" I blurted out without thinking.
I wish I could take that back. Lucas looked taken back by my words. We both weren't expecting this to happen. Especially considering what we did last night. Lucas' eyes reached mine. He looked full of pain. He carefully got up and left the room. I felt terrible for what I said, but it was the truth.
I grabbed the pillow that was next to me and placed it in front of my face. I began screaming into it. It felt good to scream, but I knew it wouldn't fix things. I'm so sick of Jackson ruining everything. Ruining me. I yanked myself out of the bed to get ready so that I can fix things with Lucas before anything gets worse.
After my shower, I got changed into light wash jeans, a white blouse, a gray sweater, and, of course, my white glittery flats. I searched the alpha house, courtyard, and every store searching for Lucas with no luck. Where could he be?
I decided to see if Tyler knew and besides I was going to visit Tyler anyways today. I still felt responsible for his pain.
As I made my way down the path towards the hospital, I continued to look for Lucas. I got up on my tiptoes a few times in an attempt to see over people's heads. At one point I thought I saw him. I ran over to him only to find out I had discovered a complete stranger. It was very awkward trying to explain to him why I had run over to him. He looked at me with a smile and continued on with his day. This search was useless.
I finally arrived at Tyler's room after climbing five flights of stairs. They put Tyler in a private wing. I also asked the receptionist for Nora's room, but she was released this morning. I walked in only to find Tyler reading a book while eating potato chips.
"Should you really be eating potato chips?" I giggled.
"Why yes. Yes, I should. The hospital food they tried serving me is crap." He joked back. There is no surprise that hospital food sucked.
"How are you doing? I mean with everything."
"Besides the fact that I'm forced to eat terrible food, I'm doing great. Enough about me. What happened with Lucas and you? I mean seriously. One moment you're in love and the next you despise each other. I can never keep track."
Tyler was right. One minute we love each other and the next, we don't. It seems to always crash and burn when we are not on the same page of things.
"I don't know Tyler. I don't know. It just seems like Jackson is the root of the problem."
"Mia, I'm going to be very frank with you. Jackson is a problem, but he isn't the big issue. You are. You still haven't let go of your old life. That life is dragging you down and is taking what you have with Lucas down with you. The only way for your new life to work is for you to let go."
Tyler was right. He is always right. I am the problem causing a million other problems.
"Thank you. Do you know where I can find Lucas? I need to talk to him." I replied in determination.
"He told me not to tell you. But Mia. You know where he is."
I gave Tyler a faint smile. I don't know where he is. That's why I asked him. I created a map in my head checking off everywhere I searched. Then it hit me. I know where Lucas is.
"Thank you!" I said as I bolted out of the room.
"Oh, Mia!" Tyler called. I went back into the room. "I suggest you take a horse," He said as he looked down at my shoes. I couldn't hike in flats. "I almost forgot. You better hurry."
"Why?" I asked confused. "For the paint war of course." I had no clue what the paint war was, but it had no time to question it.
-------
After about thirty minutes, I found Lucas sitting on a rock staring at the waterfall where we had our first date. I jumped off the horse and began walking to him.
"Can I sit?" I questioned.
Lucas gave a nod and I began to sit down. We both didn't make eye contact. We stared straight ahead at the lake. There was a lot more tension here than last time.
"I'm sorry." We both said at the same time.
"Please don't be sorry. I'm sorry that I suffocated you." Lucas began to say.
"Stop speaking," I whispered as I placed a finger on his lips to make him be quiet.
"You're the one who shouldn't be sorry. I should. It's just that, I'm struggling to try to find my place here. I'm still attached to my old life and I can't find a way to let go. And then with what Jackson said to me last night..." I began to explain.
"What did Jackson say?" Lucas asked cutting my sentence off.
Tears began to trickle out of my eyes once again. Lucas pulled me to his chest.
"Jackson said the truth. I can't win. I'm so sick of trying to act strong. Trying to put on a brave face when I'm lying to everyone including myself. I can't keep doing this. I can't keep pretending like everything is okay when it's not." I sobbed.
"It okay Mia. I don't want you to keep pretending. Please just talk to me. I'm here to listen." Lucas spoke reassuring me.
"Thank you," I whispered.
"For what?" He smiled.
"Being mine."
Lucas then kissed me on my cheek. His kiss radiated heat through my body.
"Lucas, what's a paint war?" I asked innocently.
Lucas lifted me from his chest and stared at me in disbelief. "You've never heard of a paint war before?" I nodded my head no at his question. "A paint war is basically when you through the paint at people. Except we do it after every ball to ruin all the dresses and suits."
"Are you serious?!"
"Despite our reputation, we know how to have fun. Do you want to join?" He smiled. I nodded my head until my expression turned sad. "What's wrong?"
"I don't exactly have a dress. Remember?" Lucas laughed at my question.
"You can join wearing what you are now. Not everyone decides to wear their dresses to it. Anyway, we best get going now."
We both got up from the rock. Lucas walked towards the path while I walked towards the horse I brought.
"Lucas?" I said as I signaled the horse.
"Right." He laughed as he walked back towards me.