YAZIA'S POV
I opened my eyes tentatively, squinting against the harsh brightness of the room. Blinking away the haze, I slowly took in my surroundings, my gaze settling on the pristine white ceiling above me. The sterile scent of antiseptic filled the air.
I can tell I am in hospital. Every muscle ached with fatigue, and a dull throbbing pain pulsed through my foot. With a soft groan, I shifted slightly in the hospital bed, the crisp sheets rustling beneath me.
As I let out a sigh, the weight of past events crashed over me like a lightning bolt. "Taehyung...", I said his name and tried to get up but stopped hearing a voice full of frustration cut through the haze of my thoughts... "Don't move", I glanced at Namjoon not hearing his words, and sat up.
"Your stubbornness will harm to real bad one day", Namjoon voiced out and I scoffed. No matter how exhausted or vulnerable I may be, I refused to let anyone dictate my actions. I would do what I wanted, consequences don't matter.
"What are you doing here?", I asked him not understanding why he was there. He should be with his friend, not me. By this my mind went to 'that thing' is he ok? I want to ask but my pride never let me.
"I am not here by my choice. Taehyung forced me to look after you.", Taehyung forced him? but why is he that nice? Why would Taehyung go to such lengths for me? Despite my best efforts to frustrate him, he still cared enough to ensure I was taken care of. I looked at Namjoon, narrowing my eyes in suspicion.
"If you are here who is there with him?", I blurted out, mentally scolding myself for the slip. I braced myself for a sarcastic retort, but instead, Namjoon remained surprisingly calm as he took a seat on the stool near my bed. Calm than I ever thought.
"I called his father he is with him your family is on their way too", he informed me, his tone steady and reassuring. I nodded. "What happened to the attackers and suppliers?", I asked him wondering what really happened. At that time, I was not in my senses all in my mind was how to save Taehyung.
Namjoon's response was nonchalant, his tone tinged with a hint of arrogance as he recounted the events. "About that... I called the police after dealing with a fair amount of them, and then I ran to save you both," he explained, his posture relaxed as he sat on the stool, one leg casually crossed over the other. I nodded in understanding, absorbing his words without much reaction.
"By the way I never thought you cry too", His tone got a teasing edge. This man just trying to test my patience. I cried and I was embarrassed, but my mind was not responding well, and my emotions just burst out, but can I show him I am embarrassed? No, never in my whole life I let anyone have this satisfaction.
"And I never thought it's your business", I retorted sharply, my tone laced with thinly veiled annoyance. Namjoon's chuckle only served to fuel my irritation, and I fought to keep my composure in the face of his amusement.
"I am fine you can go now." I glared at him and let these words out with a straight face. I turned away, refusing to let Namjoon see any further cracks in my armor. I may have shown vulnerability once, but I wouldn't make that mistake again.
"I don't like how proud and stubborn you are," Namjoon's voice softened, a rare moment of sincerity breaking through his usual demeanor. He stood up and looked straight at me.
"But despite that," he continued, "you still tried your best to save my friend." His words hung in the air, carrying a weight of acknowledgment and gratitude that caught me off guard.
"Even you have a PSTD and can't get inside the car-" My breath caught in my throat as he revealed a vulnerability, I had tried so hard to hide. "How did you know?" I interjected, the thought of anyone knowing my weaknesses was akin to being stripped bare. Namjoon scratched his eyebrow tilting his head.
"The doctor told me. He said you had a panic attack due to stress, and Uncle Kim mentioned your fear of driving." He told me casually.
"You did try your best and I am thankful. It was all your fault we ended up in the situation but thank you for being stubborn till the end." After a moment of contemplation, he nodded to himself. "I realize now that your unbearable habits aren't as harmful to others as I thought."
Namjoon saying all this gives me chills. I never imagined him saying all and it really scary. Is he the same man who spit insults in every sentence he said to me?
I cleared my thoughts and ignored his words I was not ready for Namjoon to be nice. Namjoon's sudden shift in demeanor was disconcerting, and I wasn't ready to entertain the idea of him being anything other than the abrasive individual I had come to know.
I removed the white sheets on me and looked at my foot in bandage my Abaya was still on me then suddenly I realized I was not wearing a hijab. If it was past me, she would be ok, but I felt uncomfortable it's been months of doing hijab and it felt unsettled not having one.
Namjoon felt it too and by his lowering gaze, I could surely tell he felt the restlessness in my body language. But why did he lower his gaze? He is one of the people who was at first to mock me on my religion then why?
"Wait a minute", Namjoon said and almost ran out of the room leaving me stunned. There are a lot of whys in my mind. In a few minutes, Namjoon came with a paper bag in his hands and held it towards me.
I took it confused and opened it. My confusion turned into shock seeing a white hijab inside the bag. I looked at Namjoon with a questioning gaze raising my eyebrows.
"Taehyung told me to give it to you after you woke up", it made me speechless. Taehyung, despite his own injuries, had thought to ensure I had my hijab with me. I pulled out the hijab and rolled it around my head with a faint smile I was not aware of for some seconds. I suppressed my smile.
"I still have the same question as before why you are wearing it when I have seen you without it what's the matter of you trying to cover up now?" I looked at him and my father's words came into my mind. I felt no anger like I used to feel when someone asked me this question in the past.
I took a deep breath. "My Allah ordered up to cover us and I am just following it", Yazia responded and Namjoon got more confused. "But why? it's not like no one ever saw you without it?"
I nodded and looked at my bandaged foot. "It's just a precautionary measure. I know you have seen me without it, but every time you see someone of the opposite gender, there is a chance they may become attracted to me, even if you have seen them many times before. I learned from a past mistake. If I had not been dressed modestly that night, would that guy have tried to hit on me? It's not always about clothing, but I can do my best on my end to reduce the chances of unwanted attention."
I told him my true thoughts and he fell in thoughts. I can tell he is trying to analyze what I said. Najoon sighed he asked genuinely curious. "Why do you really believe there is a god? did he ever come to you or you saw him?"
"I am not too much good with words like my little sister and may not know much about all this. I was a confused person like you till I felt it on my own. I was rebellious but I felt the darkness I was earning on my every wrong deed and I can tell you that darkness is soul-wrenching." I told him what I really felt and he sneered.
"You are just saying impractical things, that makes no sense", Namjoon's words held frustration. At this moment I wish I was like Ayzal who can answer his all questions. I know I can't but I still tried my best.
"When I was at my lowest, he was there to lift me up. Every time I was stuck, he helped me without fail. When I felt like nobody else was there for me, I found solace in Allah's presence. In moments of darkness, his name shone like a beacon of hope. Today, when I was faced with a helpless situation, he was there for me again. I asked for his help and now I'm alive, along with Taehyung."
Namjoon pocked his cheek and let out a chuckle. "It was me who helped you not the god or whatever you call him", Namjoon's tone was frustrated he was tired of this nonsense.
"I firmly believe that Allah was the one who sent you there and made the source. If it wasn't His will, you wouldn't have been able to save anyone," I said to Namjoon. He seemed lost in thought again, but I stand by my words with conviction. I can't do more than this.
The thought of Taehyung came to my mind. I held the corner of the hijab I was wearing. Is he ok? If he sends this to me it means he is fine but... I should check on my own.
I have many questions too. Why he risked his life for me? Why didn't he just leave me when I fell? Can anyone act this nice just for the show? I don't think so... I need to see him.
I moved to the side of the hospital and my legs hung down to the side. Namjoon snapped out of his thoughts as I moved and frowned. "Where are you going?" Namjoon was confused I stood up and put a little weight down on my foot.
A painful full hiss left my mouth. "Please stop moving around and get back in bed. Your family will be arriving soon", Namjoon told me and I limped towards the door ignoring his words. I need to see Taehyung.
"Why you don't listen to me? huh?", Namjoon's frustrated tone was back to the tone I appreciated more than that scary soft tone which made me feel like he was pitting me. I don't like it. I got out of the room. but realize I don't know what 'that thing' is.
"Where is Taehyung?", I asked Namjoon not finding any other way. Namjoon narrowed his eyes. "What's with you two, you both are concerned for each other like you have been friends for years."
"Are you crazy I am not worried or caring for him. He just got hurt because of me and I want to see if he is okay I feel nothing towards him except guilt", Why do my words seem like I am trying to explain myself?
"I Never said. you feel anything towards Taehyung, but you guys behaving suspiciously", Namjoon pressed on this topic again and I let out a frustrated sound. "Just tell me where he is if not, I'll find him on my own", I stated, and he chuckled. He is not sane why he is laughing?
"Wait I'll take you to him", Namjoon told me, and I leaned to the door taking its support waiting for him to show me the way. But to my surprise, he went back inside the room. Before I could ask him, he came out with a wheelchair.
Does he really expect me to sit on this? No, I am not that weak. "Sit on it I'll take you there", he waited for me to sit, and I stood stubbornly there. "I can walk", I told him, and he nodded skeptically. "Yeah... sure now sit."
We had a glaring competition for a while. I sighed getting tired and sat in the wheelchair with a frustrated expression. "You could have sat nicely, it's not good to always be persistent," Namjoon said and pushed the wheelchair.
I ignored him and let him push me to Taehyungs room. He stopped in front of a hospital room and gestured that we arrived. "You can go inside, I need to go and bring food for Taehyung", Namjoon said and left me there.
I pushed the door and it opened but the loud voices made me stop in track. "You will never change, is there anything you can do right", It was Uncle Kim from his tone I could tell he was really mad. Is he scolding Taehyung?
"Because of your rash decision, Yazia got hurt, and you are lying on the bed injured. Who told you to act impulsively and just go out fighting with suppliers? You were aware they are dangerous." Uncle's tone was harsh and his words felt like a tight slap.
Did he misunderstand? "Why he is blaming Taehyung for all the trouble I created?" I asked myself in confusion. "Sorry Dad I made a mistake. I am sorry. I'll apologize from her and Uncle Saad too." Taehyung tone was low and tired.
Why he is taking the blame for my mistake? I felt bad Uncle was harsh. Taehyung is injured and getting scolded because of me. I felt guilt washed over me. "Don't just scold my son, let him rest", Taehyungs Mother said and I gathered the courage to enter.
I opened the door and everyone looked at me making me more nervous but I hid it well. "Yazia!", Aunt said and rushed towards me and helped me to enter inside by pushing my unnecessary wheelchair.
Uncle smiled and then looked at me with concern. "Yazia... how are you feeling now? and why are you wandering around you should rest." Uncle said with a worried tone and Aunty hit his shoulder and spoke, "Stop scolding everyone. go and bring Taehyung's stuff from home and check where her parents are."
Uncle sighed and obeyed Aunt's order. I chuckled looking at them. I felt a strong gaze on me and I didn't dare to look at Taehyung for some reason.
"Yazia are feeling ok?" I nodded at Auntie's question. "I am fine now, don't get worried I can walk it's just Namjoon wanted to be dramatic", I told her my disapproval for wheelchair. She laughed and patted my cheek.
"I am sorry for what happened, and I am thankful you helped Taehyung despite your-" I cut her off before she could mention my PSTD and spoke, "It's not a big deal, I just did what was right and it all happened-"
"Because of me." My words were cut off by Taehyung and I narrowed my eyes. Why he is taking the blame? I glanced at Taehyung who was sitting there leaning on the bed looking at me not even blinking.
I held eye contact with him not loving away and he looked away and smiled. "Don't look at me like that, my warrior I told you it made me weak", I widened my eyes and my first instinct was to look and Aunt Kim. Who shook her head and chuckled.
"I have some work, Yazia look after him in a minute I'll just come after doing my Important work", she said and dashed out of the room. What she would be thinking. This shameless man. I'll kill him with my bare hands. "Ash... Yazia Muder is haram you can't", I thought in my mind.
"Why did you say that in front of her, She will misunderstand", I glared at Taehyung and he chuckled but hissed in pain making me forget about my anger. "Are you ok?" I am not sure why my tone is this soft and concerned.
"Just guilt Yazia. You are guilty", I told myself. Taehyung showed me a thumbs-up and smiled. This man is really getting under my skin. "She knows, I told her about us", He said in a weak tone.
"There is no 'US', stop assuming things", I said sternly and licked his lip. "Come on I am injured trying to save you and you are being mean to me", He whinned and I scoffed.
"Why you took the blame?", I inquired and he gave me a confused reaction. He is a good actor, but when he really needs those skills, they disappear. It looks fake. "Stop acting like you don't know anything you are aware of what I am talking about."
He gave me an embarrassed smile and looked into my eyes. His eyes are deep telling a lot of things I want to ignore. "I told you I'll take the blame for your every mistake, I never say things I don't mean."
His words left me speechless. I want to hate him but why he is just making it difficult for me day by day? 'Yazia don't let him get you, be strong' I repeated these words in my mind.
"You don't have to do anything for me, neither taking blame nor taking a hit for me", my words came out weak the harshness I wanted to add was not even near my words.
"But I want to, and you can't stop me from doing anything", his words hold determination and I gave him a pissed looked. "Do whatever you want," I retorted, my words laced with irritation. "But I still don't like you."
Despite my best efforts to maintain a facade of indifference, I couldn't help but notice the boxy smile No, why I am noticing how his smile looks?
"Stop! Yazia", I warned myself.
"But I want to ask you something", Taehyung said and I narrowed my eyes. "What? " He gave me a look I was unable to comprehend. He asked the question and left me confused. Does he not remember
"You said we met in childhood I want to know when? how? and why?"
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"I created a facade of strong me and no one is allowed to cross it"
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Hoping you to be in god health I am really desperate to end this book before I start my tutoring session for Medical's entry test, I want to study without al this on my mind whole day. I don't know about other authors but I can't help just to think about it whole day and deciding how can I write it better!!
Pray for me. I want to find path I can walk on and it's difficult!! No one can relate to Suga's "So Far Away" more then me these day... One of my all time favorite!
I am just ranting, don't mind me!! keep smiling! hope your deams come true!!
VOTE!! and COMMENT!!
From V
*:･ﾟ✧