ROSE
(Present moment.)
I stared up at the white ceiling of Perry's loft, and got lost in my thoughts as I had barely slept during the night.
I was sleeping in the guest room, but I didn't get much sleep during the night because I recalled the memories of three months ago.
The way I had broken Lev's trust, but he still helped me by getting rid of Marcella's friend, even listening to me vent about my feelings.
If I was him at that moment, I would kill me, that's how guilty I feel every day when I think of him.
He was nothing but kind and generous to me, always taking care of me, listening to me, showering me with gifts, and I fell for that.
Never once in my life had somebody treated me that way, and I was starved for affection, starved for the affection he gave me.
That did not mean that I would give myself to someone who gave me the bare minimum of so-called affection, but for Lev I was struck off my feet like a person in love.
I sighed, glancing at the curtains, since it was early morning and the sun peeked through the closed curtains of the room.
For the past two weeks I had stayed at Perry's loft since my friends saved me from being locked in Damian's penthouse.
I didn't want to get out of bed, but not for the reasons one might think.
I felt exhausted and nauseous, I thought I caught a stomach bug, but I didn't vomit, as my symptoms were rather mild and they were slowly fading.
I currently laid in bed, enjoying the quiet moment of peace, until Perry knocked on the door and walked inside.
He closed the door behind him, and took a seat on the edge of the bed.
"The sneaky little whore is awake," He says, and I couldn't miss the playful tone in his voice.
I kicked him in the ribs, but he caught my feet and started tickling under them. I ended up laughing, as he enjoyed torturing me.
He stopped once Looking at me by Sabrina Carpenter began to blast through the speakers in the kitchen, indicating that Kiara and Eli were making breakfast.
"They seem to have the time of their life." I commented because of the thud in the kitchen due to Kiara and Eli putting on a performance of a lifetime.
"Eli and Kiara are inseparable." Perry mentioned, and I couldn't agree more, since they are childhood friends.
Perry let go of my feet while his gaze grew concerned as he looked at me, because a few days ago, I only told Perry about how I lost my virginity.
He was disappointed.
Though he didn't yell at me, instead he booked a therapy session for me, and the funny part?
An hour later the therapist called and canceled the appointment even if they didn't have a fully booked schedule this month.
Perry tried another mental health clinic, but an hour later they also cancelled my other appointment, to the point I wasn't allowed to book at any mental health clinic in the entire country.
I was Rose Knight to them, married to Damian Knight. I was part of the Spencer family, and the Knight family through marriage.
I wasn't allowed to be near any mental health clinics.
I wasn't allowed to be seen at any mental health clinics, so they banned me from them. Because my father has a team of people surveying my movements, not unless I'm by Lev's side.
Perry tried to book under his name, but he also ended up getting banned.
They knew about my best friend, who's my rock through thick and thin.
But I needed help, my mind was crumbling into pieces. It has been ever since I was born into the Spencer family.
"I tried in Europe too, but you're banned everywhere. Your father used all of his connections." Perry explained because he had tried to get me help all over the world, but failed.
"It's rather Damian's father and my father that used all of their connections together because my father is not that powerful, his power is still growing," I say, staring up at the white ceiling.
I was just seeking professional help, but they didn't believe in mental health.
They believed in good deeds and prayers.
"When is Enzo ending your father? If your brother is not going to do it, then what was the point with the marriage?" He asks, but I don't even have the answer to that question.
I told Enzo that teaming up with the Knight's wasn't good, but he didn't listen to me, he told me I was delusional.
Perry and I sat in silence for a few minutes until our friends called us for breakfast. We headed to eat, and I didn't have much of an appetite, but I forced myself to eat a little bit.
Afterward, I headed to take a nap. I have been taking excessive amounts of naps lately, as I have been experiencing a lot of fatigue.
I didn't think it was anything serious, but if I started to Google the symptoms of my sickness, I would order Perry to prepare my funeral next week because I was dying of an incurable illness.
I woke up much later in the middle of the day, and the nausea was still there, but luckily I didn't vomit.
I yawned, staring at the two cats that had made their way into the bedroom when I was asleep.
One cat was at the end of my bed, and the other laid on top of my stomach. Their fur was all black, the only difference was that one of them had blue eyes and the other brown.
Perry had gotten them two years ago, and they were his children.
Anus and Boner.
Perry is very creative with names. You should have seen it when he introduced his cats to the neighbor next door.
'I love my anus so much.' Perry said to the neighbor next door. An old man in his late fifties, who lives with his dogs.
'I play with my anus everyday, I can't seem to stop myself.' He added.
'Y-You w-what?' The startled and petrified neighbor questioned him.
'I can't forget to mention my lovely boner. He's like my child, he loves when I stroke him.'
I laughed to myself at the memory because I was there that day, laughing my ass off in the doorway.
Perry loves to give people a good scare.
Anus suddenly meowed, he was laying on my stomach and purred when I stroked his head.
The cat wasn't really friendly, he always hid himself away from others, and gave them death glares, but lately he was into cuddling, specifically with me.
I snuggled with the cat, enjoying a few peaceful moments until Anus jumped off the bed and headed out of the bedroom.
I also stood up from the bed, heading out of the room to see what my friends were up to because they are always up to crazy things.
I walked out of the guest room and into the living room.
In the middle of the living room, the couch and chairs had been pushed away, leaving an empty space in the middle for my friends.
Perry was sitting in the middle of a black circle, in front of him were pictures of Damian, Marcella, my father, my mother, and my brothers.
In the background, on the TV, was calm music playing that was about nine hours long. On the title, it stood, 'Banish negative energy in nine hours.'
Perry had his eyes shut, mumbling under his breath,"Be gone negativity."
Beside him, Eli and Kiara were wearing dark cloaks, they were actually wrapped around in dark bedsheets while they threw a little bit of ketchup on the pictures of my so-called family, as the ketchup would serve as blood.
I covered a hand over my mouth, clutching into my stomach and dying from laughter.
They finished the ritual by standing up and dancing around the dark circle.
"Hopefully they are gone now because nobody will miss them." Perry gave me one of his many smiles that were never ending.
Eli and Kiara finally took off the dark bedsheets while laughing at each other.
After things settled, they cleaned up the slight mess, as Perry threw the pictures of my family in the fireplace, spitting curses and wishing horrible things upon them.
Today we decided to have a movie day, as all of us watched a couple of movies, talked, cooked dinner, later we put on music and had karaoke in the living room.
All of us sang together until it neared midnight, and I was the first one to head to sleep, while the rest of my friends had a karaoke night with alcohol and snacks.
For the third time today, I headed to the guest room, falling on the bed, pulling the bed covers over me, cuddling into them as sleep came to me.
Sleeping helped me with the slight nausea that had overcome me these past weeks.
I couldn't drink alcohol because the strong smell made me nauseous, or any other strong smells.
When I was deeply asleep, out of nowhere, I suddenly felt two pairs of hands strangling my neck, cutting off my airways, and I couldn't breathe anymore.
My eyes shot wide open, scratching the person's arms, but it wouldn't budge, as they straddled me, pushing me into the bed.
The person wore a mask, and I couldn't see their face while they suffocated me, draining every inch of my life.
I thought I was going to die, but my survival instincts kicked in while I was being strangled to death.
I was going to die while I struggled against the masked person, scratching and kicking my feet, but it was all useless.
One of my hands stretched out to my side, reaching out and searching for any object on the nightstand, anything that would save me.
I grabbed a hold of an object, I didn't know what it was, but I hit the masked person extremely hard on the head.
The masked person fell on the ground with a thug, they collapsed on the floor beside the bed.
I coughed, letting go of the object in my hand and pressing a gentle hand on my neck, trying to regain my breathing as I slowly sat up, leaning against the bed frame.
I glanced at the person on the floor, who had fallen on their stomach, face first, as a pool of blood was gathering around their head, spreading on the floor.
The masked person seemed to be a man, dressed in all black along with a mask on their face, but I did not have a feeling like I had ever seen this person before.
He seemed to move slightly, trying to stand up, but my instincts kicked in again, and I fell on the floor, on top of the man and straddled him while taking his wrists behind his back.
"You f-fucking bitch, y-your father said that you're w-weak." He grumbled under his breath because he had little strength left.
"My father sent you to kill me?" I questioned him, as he chuckled, finding the situation funny, but I pressed tighter around his wrists, my nails digging harshly into his skin.
"W-Who e-else." He laughed a bit more, but as each second passed, he was slowly dying, and he could be saved, if I wanted to.
But somewhere deep down, I didn't want to save him, I wanted to make the man's final moments horrific.
I wasn't physically strong, the reason I could hold the man down was because he was weak and dying, or else he could have thrown me across the bedroom.
A thing I could do was to scare him, that it would leave a scar on his soul.
I leaned closer, my chest was almost pressing on his back as I whispered against his ear, "I wonder if I should stop you from dying? That you could live just a tad longer and get tortured? Who knows what kind of valuable information you have about my father?"
"And you're g-going to t-torture me?" His voice was filled with sarcasm, and he started to laugh louder.
"Of course not. I'm weak and fragile, I faint at the slightest sight of blood and I cry at any given opportunity," I tell him.
"But do you want to know who's not weak or fragile? Who loves the sight of blood? Who would make you want to kill yourself before they could hurt you?" I add.
His laughter starts to slowly die down, like he knows what I'm about to say will not be good.
"Lev Mikhaylov."
He had turned quiet because nobody wanted to cross wrong paths with the Pahkan of the Bratva, the mob boss of the Russian mafia.
"Do you remember the guy on the news, about a month ago? The guy whose dick got cut off and had it shoved up deep in his ass, then stitched shut?" I say, and the man shuddered under me because he was terrified.
There was no more laughter coming from him.
"Do you want to be the next victim?" I ask him.
The man began to sob, peeing himself in the process and staining the carpet on the floor. He cried some more, until he stopped, and he was dead.
The man was dead as I got off him, and stood beside his corpse.
I took sharp breaths, running a hand through my hair because I didn't know I had it in me to kill him.
The man was dead, and I killed him, because he deserved it.
I would do it all over again if I had to.
I glanced at the object I had killed him with by hitting harshly in his head, and it was a candlestick made of metal, the stick was sharp and hard as the top of the candlestick was covered in blood.
I stared at the opened window, the curtains slightly flapping because of the calm wind outside.
That was how the masked man made his way into the bedroom, by breaking through the window, and trying to kill me when I fell asleep.
Perry's loft wasn't that high, it was only on the second floor, and people who worked for my father knew how to kill and climb.
"Thank god he didn't try to kill me when I was suicidal," I mumble under my breath.
Outside the guestroom, my friends were still having karaoke in the living room, the music was loud as they sang, and they were a little bit drunk.
Perry sang on top of his lungs, my heart will go on by Celine Dion, he had done it the entire time the masked man was dying.
But now that the man was dead, I needed to get rid of his corpse.
It couldn't stay in Perry's loft in case my best friend got the cops called on him, he would be framed for murder if they found the dead man in the guest room.
I was panicking inside, not because I killed the man, but I was afraid of getting caught, or my friends getting framed for something they had no part of.
I stared at the corpse, I had killed, but no overwhelming emotions came to me.
I had seen enough death around me. My father made me used to death, and I saw many people die in front of me.
My father never hid the mafia business, instead he showed us the blood and the corpses on the floors, and what he did to someone who betrayed him, everyone except for Marcella.
My brothers and I had seen it all. All of us had different ways to cope.
One brother was living in a state of denial.
The other one drowned himself in drugs and sex.
Enzo was seeking revenge, at the same time he was seeking our father's attention, he was a lost child in a man's body.
And me? I was seeking Lev's attention. An older man I saw as a father figure, and at the same time somebody I would want to pursue a romantic relationship with.
The way he caressed my cheek whenever he bought me a dress and I looked into the mirror, telling myself how much I loved how I looked.
He praised me, telling me what a good girl I was for appreciating myself because he knew about my deep-rooted insecurities, and how much I would compare myself to others, tearing down myself in the process.
I almost forgot that there was a corpse next to me, someone I had killed for the first time, but the mere thoughts of Lev made me forget about the dire situation.
I glanced at the corpse, and in the back of my mind an idea started to consume me.
The idea of paying a visit to my half-sister along with the corpse, what kind of reaction would she have once she finds a corpse in her bed?
The reaction would simply be priceless that money could not buy.
°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･
DAMN, WE'RE OVER 9K READS??? IT WAS ONLY YESTERDAY WHEN I HAD 70 READS AND THEY WERE ALL FROM ME...( ◡̀_◡́)ᕤ
I CANNOT THANK YOU ENOUGH FOR READING THIS STORY!!! (,,>﹏<,,)
STAY TUNED FOR THE UPCOMING DRAMA OF THE INFAMOUS HOLLYWOOD COUPLE LEV AND ROSE! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)