CHAPTER FOURTEEN.
what am i suppose to do if there's no you?
THEN.
FEYRE BLANCHARD felt misunderstood by many people in her life. Well, whatever life she could've possibly lived in the last nine years since she left the comfort of her mother's womb. Other kids in school would point and laugh at Feyre because she stood out with her bright and strange personality. Teachers would scold at her for things that felt meaningless because she couldn't read or write properly like the other kids in her class, or because she had a terrible attention span growing up. Even now, Feyre found comfort in allowing her mind and creativity to grow than be confined to the solitude of basic learning skills in the four walls of a classroom that she believed was pointless to a young girl like herself.
Even when Feyre met her grandparents for the first and last time, they stared down at her like she was inhuman, like some freak of nature. She once overheard her grandmother tell her grandfather that she had ruined her mother's life for something as simple as existing. Having a child and destroying your future is one thing, but tolerating the existence of a troubled child such as herself was downright ridiculous. Feyre was five years old at the time. She felt crushed to know her blood family could be so cruel towards her and her mother when they were suppose to show endless love without a single cost. But that was the first time Feyre believed she was nothing more than a burden to her mother. Her existence being nothing more than a fork in the road to what her mom's life could've been.
However, if there was one person Feyre believed would always be on her side through thick and thin — it was her mother.
Rosalind Blanchard had stuck by her daughter through every harrowing nightmare in the midst of every dark night, and every public outburst whenever Feyre saw something she was sure was watching her from a distance. Her mom would stay with Feyre until she fell asleep again in the comfort of the woman's arms, and tell the young girl that she just had an active imagination and nothing could be possibly wrong with her. Feyre felt as if she always had someone she could turn to in the middle of everything that felt wrong in her life. Her mom was her own personal superhero, flying in to save her daughter from the monsters, who often came to the girl in the form of her school bullies and cruel adults.
But when Feyre was sent to the school principal's office after causing a scene in the middle of the playground during recess, resulting in a dozen scared kids and concerned adults. Feyre believed it wasn't her fault, because she was certain she saw a creature made up of two different animals, a lion and an eagle. Or at least that was what she had been claiming earlier that day on the school playground. The creature didn't try to hurt her. Feyre didn't even think it posed as a threat, but the other students and even the teachers believed her loud ramblings of some half lion, half bird creature was the real threat. Especially when many worried parents were screaming at the staff to do something about the crazy girl with an obscure imagination.
So Feyre sat next to her mother in the principal's office and listened as the woman didn't even try to defend her daughter, and accepted the punishment, which was a week long suspension. Feyre didn't say much on the drive back home, but it was apparent to Rosalind Blanchard that her daughter was upset. And when they entered the four condensed walls of their small Brooklyn apartment, that was when young nine year old Feyre finally decided that she needed to speak her mind. Even in the face of her mother. "You didn't help me," She spoke, her voice barely above a whisper.
It was, however, loud enough for Rosalind to hear. She placed her daughter's backpack down on the table placed in the empty corner of the kitchen, before she turned around to face the younger girl. "What did you say, Sunshine?" She inquired. She knew her daughter was upset. She just didn't realise how hurt the girl had become until this very moment.
Feyre let out a quiet sigh, looking up at her mom with a sad look glazed over her eyes. "You let him stand there and say I was lying. I wasn't lying, momma," Feyre countered, her voice cracking in the process. Rosalind couldn't admit this out loud, but the sound of her daughter's frail and delicate voice made her heart ache. It broke her to stare into those brown eyes belonging to her daughter, and see nothing but pain and distrust.
Rosalind pursed her lips into a thin line for a moment. There were times when she would've fought tooth and nail to keep Feyre in that school. But this time around she sadly took the punches and allowed the principal to suspend her without a single protest from the woman. Under most circumstances, Rosalind would've defended her daughter in a heartbeat. But this time it was different because she knew her Feyre wasn't imagining the creature in the playground that day. Although most kids couldn't see it, Feyre could because she was special. However, that was a part of the young girl that Rosalind wasn't ready to face just yet. She could handle the bad dreams and the learning difficulties in her life, but not the spotting of monsters and other mythical creatures. Not yet. Maybe not ever.
The woman slowly approached the girl and kneeled down in front of her, grabbing her little hands with her own. Feyre wrapped her petite fingers around her mother's, lifting her teary gaze to watch the woman smile sheepishly back at her. "Sweetie, you just have an overactive imagination. There's nothing wrong with it. But you can't go around scaring other kids—"
"I wasn't lying!" Feyre exclaimed, letting go of her mom's hands before she tried to storm off down the hall and towards her bedroom. But the familiar sound of her mom's voice was enough to make the girl stop in her tracks.
"And I believe you. I do," Rosalind blurted out, watching as Feyre stopped before turning around on her heel, a stray tear rolling down her rosy cheek. That was truly when Rosalind felt her heart beginning to shatter into a million tiny pieces. "It's just...not everyone gets it. That's why I couldn't say anything to your principal," The woman then sighed.
"But it isn't fair!" Feyre was beginning to raise her voice, her bottom lip starting to quiver in the process. "Everyone looks at me like I'm some freak. You did today when Mr. Adler was explaining what happened. I always thought you were on my side," She elaborated.
Rosalind shook her head. "I am on your side, Sunshine. I always have been," She defended, approaching her daughter. However, Feyre wasn't convinced by her words, causing for the girl to step further back.
"You're just like everyone else," Feyre shot back. Her bloodshot eyes narrowing into a hateful stare towards her mom before she turned around and ran towards her bedroom, slamming the door shut behind her. It was so loud that it could've been strong enough to make the whole apartment shake.
And all Feyre Blanchard could do was fall to the floor and cry. But little did the young girl know, her mother was doing the her best to muffle her own sobs on the other side of the door separating them both.
NOW.
Feyre Blanchard felt like the world was going to collapse in on itself and smother her to death at any second. Her chest felt tight with dread. Her veins felt like they were on fire, pulsating sharply with rage. She felt the fear creep up her spine and press harshly against the nape of her neck, like a hand had a firm grip on her neck. It was a harrowing reminder that something had gone terribly wrong, and for once she might not be able to fix it. Her breathing then became irregular and erratic, like she was on the brink of a violent panic attack that planned to suffocate her whole at any given moment. Everything around her as she marched her way through camp, passing other fellow campers, some she considered her friends, started to fade out of her peripheral vision, drowned out by the static flooding her eardrums.
Her mom was dying. She was dying and Feyre couldn't do anything to stop it. Naturally, Feyre would've found a solution. If she had been there she could have protected her mom from the monster that found its way to their doorstep. If she was a better healer than her siblings, she would go straight to that hospital and save her mom. But Feyre Blanchard was no god. She wasn't powerful enough to heal such extensive injuries. This was something completely out of her control. Feyre always dreamed about leaving camp to reunite her mom in the flesh. She just didn't think it would happen like this. Not only was she leaving camp, but she was leaving to see her mom one last time. . . to say goodbye. A day Feyre believed would never come.
Feyre wished this was all some sick and twisted nightmare. She hoped she would wake up at any second, call her mom, and everything would go back to normal, and everything would be okay again. However, that was a dream, and this was a her unfortunate reality.
And to make it worst, her father was here. Apollo had spent eighteen years ignoring Feyre the best he could. He claimed her when she came to camp, sent her the occasional gift, and that was it. He was never the father she needed. He was never there when it mattered most and she resented him for that. It was more than just resentment. Feyre hated Apollo with every fibre of her very being. She hated him for abandoning her. She hated him even more for abandoning her mother. She hated that he let Alina and Delia down when they needed him most of all. And now he was showing up like it would make a difference. The very thought of having to spend the whole day with him on one of the worst days of her life made Feyre Blanchard want to scream.
As Feyre continued to walk towards her cabin to grab her backpack, planning to meet her dad by Thalia's tree, she was quickly spotted by Luke and Alina who were seated outside cabin eleven. Alina made an attempt to call her older sister over, but she quickly caught on that something was off when Feyre walked straight passed without even acknowledging either of them. However, if you were to ask Luke, the tears forming in the girl's eyes was what gave her sadness away in seconds. This caused for Luke and Alina to turn to one another, the pair exchanging a series of worried glances before they stood up and trailed close behind the girl.
When Feyre entered her cabin, she was relieved to find it was empty. The remainder of her siblings must be training or getting some lunch. The girl quickly walked towards her bunk and kneeled down, her knees scraping against the hard wooden flooring. She then grabbed her backpack before she leaned down and began to rummage through her things in hopes of finding something incredibly important. But much to Feyre's surprise, she wasn't having any luck. When her mom told her to pack a couple of bags because she would be staying somewhere for a long time when she was fourteen, Feyre took that literally and packed most of her belongings. Now she couldn't find the one thing she needed most of all in the midst of all the clutter underneath her bed.
"Feyre, you okay?" Feyre recognised that voice. It was Alina. She stopped what she was doing for a moment and looked over her shoulder, tears in her eyes to see Alina wasn't alone. Luke was standing beside her, the both of them staring down at her with concern.
Feyre ignored the question and returned back to searching through her things. "I didn't get a chance to tell Chiron about the camps allegiance to one another. Something else came up," She informed. She wanted to try and keep the details of her current dilemma to a minimal, not wanting to share the burden of her mother's imminent death. It was her responsibility to bear. She couldn't push that onto someone else.
Luke crouched down beside his best friend, watching as she didn't even acknowledge his presence next to her. "Are you trying to look for something?" He asked. Feyre didn't stop looking through her stuff while she parted her lips to speak again.
"Yeah, a stuffed bear that I brought to camp with me. I know I still have it here somewhere," Feyre replied. The girl was becoming more erratic, like she was on the verge of a full blown panic attack. Feyre then let out a bitter chuckle, almost amused. "All of the lectures I give this cabin about keeping everything cleaned and organised and I can't find a stupid stuffed bear," She laughed again, her voice cracking in the process.
Alina frowned in response to her sister's words. "You're looking for that old bear? What's so important about it?" She interrogated further. The girl then let out a quiet scoff. "Come on, what is this about? Because a stuffed bear can't be that important—"
"It is important, okay!" Feyre exclaimed loudly, her harsh tone being enough to make Alina flinch in response when she heard her sister cut her off so suddenly. Feyre was quick to realise the errors in her response and stopped what she was doing, staring down at her things before she let out a quiet cry. "I'm sorry, Alina. I didn't mean to snap. I just really need to find this stupid bear because it's important that I have it with me. This is so stupid. I don't—"
Feyre was beginning to ramble, her shaky voice starting to concern Luke and Alina. The pair looked back at each other for a moment before Luke placed his hand gently on Feyre's shoulder. "Hey..." Feyre stopped what she was doing when she heard Luke's comforting voice, causing for the girl to glance back at her best friend. "Whatever is going on, you can tell us," He encouraged softly, his gentle gaze staring straight back into Feyre's teary eyes.
It was in that moment Feyre sighed in defeat, followed by a few strangled cries that she had been keeping in from the moment Chiron gave her the devastating news about her mother. It was clear she couldn't keep it hidden anymore. Feyre then inhaled sharply and lifted her gaze to stare between Luke and Alina. "My mom was attacked by a monster. She's in the hospital and it looks like she's not going to make it," She announced, her voice shaky as she spoke.
"What?" Luke replied, sounding surprised by Feyre's sudden news before he shook his head. "But that doesn't make sense. Monsters don't attack mortals unless there's a demigod close bye. The only way your mom would've been attacked is if—"
"Someone summoned one to attack her..." Alina trailed off. She was almost too stunned to speak while she continued to tower over Feyre and Luke. "But who would do something like that?" Alina questioned in a rhetorical manner before she kneeled down beside Feyre on the other side of the girl.
Feyre shrugged her shoulders, sniffling quietly. "I don't know. Someone who was after me, or someone who wants to lure me out of camp. That's why Chiron is giving me permission to leave camp for the day. I wanted to bring you guys with me, but Chiron said it was too dangerous to let other demigods leave camp because the monster was never caught or killed. But here's the kicker...dad is taking me," She explained.
"Wait. Dad's here?" Alina inquired, sounding almost hopeful with her brows furrowed together. "Man, it's bad enough that this is all happening, but dad being here just makes everything a lot more worst for you," She then elaborated further.
Feyre nodded, "Yeah. I told him to meet me at Thalia's tree, but honestly...I would rather do this alone with the risk that I could get torn apart by some monster than be with him. I mean, he abandons me for eighteen years and shows up now? It's pathetic," She explained before she wiped away her tears. "Now if I could just find this bear..." She trailed off before she continued to rummage through her belongings.
Luke leaned over and picked up something. This caused for Feyre to lift her gaze to see the stuffed bear she had been looking for these past few minutes in her best friend's hand, a ghost of a smile etched at the corners of his lips. Feyre took it from him with an appreciative look glimmering in her eyes. "Thank you. I know it's dumb, but my mom gave me this bear when my nightmares were really bad when I was little. It made nights a lot easier for me. If I have to come back to camp before she's gone, I want to leave the bear with her so she knows she's not alone. So in a way, I'll still be with her," She told them both.
Alina gently nudged her sister, shaking her head in the process. "It's not dumb. It's actually really sweet," Alina reassured her.
"And just because Chiron and your dad think your mom won't pull through doesn't mean she won't," Luke added. He paused for a moment while he used his thumb to wipe away a stray tear rolling down Feyre's cheek. "If your mom is anything like you, there's no doubt in my mind that she'll be okay."
Feyre smiled back at Luke for a moment before she parted her lips to speak again. "Thank you, guys. I really needed to hear that," She replied. But she still remained doubtful about her mother's fate.
"That's what we're here for," Alina informed. "You should get going. We'll be here for you when you get back," She encouraged, a gentle and almost apologetic look twinkling in her eye. Feyre noticed it quickly. So quickly that she thought nothing of it, believing her eyes were just playing tricks on her.
Feyre allowed the thought to roll off her shoulders before she began to pack what she needed for the journey ahead. All she could think about right now was her mom, and the dreadful day she would be forced to spend with her father. Feyre just hoped she could get this over and done with quickly. The sooner she visited her mother and got back to camp, the sooner Apollo would leave and head back to Olympus, and the sooner she would never have to see him again. As much as her heart continued to yearn for her father to be in her life, she hated him more than enough to wish the polar opposite of her childhood fantasies and hope he would disappear again, just like her did eighteen years ago.
By the time Feyre reached the camp border, her backpack hanging over her shoulders, she was met by Apollo who stood on the outside of camp. He lifted his gaze to stare directly back at his daughter, a sympathetic stare evident in his electric green eyes before he parted his lips to speak. It was like there was so much he wanted to say, but didn't know how to find the right words. If you were to ask Feyre, there was nothing Apollo could say to make her feel better about saying goodbye to her mother, or make up for the years of abandonment. She looked straight back at him with hate and burning rage in her eyes, her jaw clenched tightly before she interrupted whatever pathetic speech he had prepared when he volunteered to take her to see her mom one last time.
"Save it because I don't want to hear anything you have to say," Feyre interjected, her voice harsh and cutting straight to the bone. Apollo glanced back at his daughter, his lips pressed into a thin line while he listened to her speak. "You are here for one thing. That's to take me to the hospital to say goodbye to my mom, and then back here. This isn't some sort of father/daughter road trip where we bond, get over our differences, and reconcile our relationship. I just want to see my mom one last time, so let's go and get this over with."
Apollo was too stunned to even speak. He didn't expect such a cold response from his daughter, but he shouldn't have been surprised either. This caused for him to nod his head. "Of course..." He paused. "Well, we should get going, I guess," He added, his voice barely above a whisper. It was unlike him to be so quiet, but in the face of the daughter he had been hopeful to meet face to face after all this time, and be welcomed by cruelty, well, it was enough to knock the God's confidence completely.
Feyre let out a sigh and stepped over the barrier for the first time in four years since her mother first dropped her off all that time ago. Now she was faced with what would be the hardest task of her life. More difficult than fighting monsters and preventing a war between the gods — it was saying goodbye.
The journey back to Brooklyn, New York, was far from comfortable. Feyre Blanchard could think of a million things she would have rather been doing than sitting in a red convertible with her dad in the drivers seat. Fighting a sea monster, or jumping into Tartarus ran a bell, and sounded a lot better than the current situation she found herself in. When Feyre pictured herself in a car with her dad, way before she found out he was a god, she often believed it would be him teaching her how to drive with firm instructions and gentle words filled with encouragement. However, that was a dream, and Feyre's unfortunate reality was them sitting in silence while he drove through the busy streets of New York City.
Brooklyn still looked the same just as Feyre left it when her mom drove her to camp four years ago. The busy streets were still packed with commuters and tourists. She could spot three different restaurants she and her mom had eaten at on special occasions, like birthdays, or that one time a twelve year old Feyre met one of her mom's short term boyfriends. She remembered liking him, but then he found out that Feyre was referred to as a problem child and didn't want to take on the weight of that responsibility. But Brooklyn was still the same city she loved. It wasn't the most beautiful place in all of New York, but she would always call it home. The girl's only wish was to return back again one day under better circumstances than the one she was stuck in.
When Apollo parked outside the hospital Rosalind Blanchard was staying in. . . The hospital she was dying in, Feyre felt this unspeakable weight begin to crush her chest. From the moment Chiron gave her the terrible news, she had been silently hoping it was all a lie, or some sort of nightmare. But now that she was faced with the horrible truth, Feyre couldn't help but realise this was in fact happening. And it scared her to death.
Sighing quietly, Apollo turned to the girl who was peering out the window, looking up at the tall building that resembled the hospital. "Whenever you're ready, we'll head inside," He informed softly.
That was all it took for Feyre to grab her bag and climb outside the car, slamming the car door shut behind her. Apollo was quick to follow his daughter inside the tall building, both of them being welcomed by individuals dressed in scrubs rushing around the entrance and carrying on down the barren corridors. Feyre felt the weight on her chest continue to apply pressure to her ribcage, but she managed to find the courage to put one foot in front of the other and ask the receptionist if she could visit Rosalind Blanchard. The woman at the desk gave them the name of the floor she was on and room number with ease. This allowed Feyre and her father to make their way upwards to the intensive care unit.
And when Feyre found the room number and stepped inside, she felt herself stop dead in her tracks when she saw the state her mother. There were wires sticking out of her body and a breathing tube shoved down her throat to help her breathe since she clearly couldn't do it on her own. All of this was hooked up to various different monitors at the head of the hospital bed, the heart monitor beeping loudly to let Feyre know her mom was still alive. At least for now. And it was in that moment all of this became real. She wasn't pining on what ifs and hypotheticals anymore. Seeing her mom in such a horrible state was enough to make Feyre inhale sharply, tears forming in the corners of her eyes when she realised her mom was actually dying.
Feyre turned around for a split second to spare her father a quick glance. She saw Apollo waiting by the open doorway, leaning against the doorframe with a sad look in his eyes. Feyre shook her head and turned back around before she approached her mother. As she got closer, Feyre began to notice all the bruises and deep scratch marks burrowed deep into her olive skin, marks left after the attack. Feyre choked back on a sob that was trying to climb its way out of her throat before she took a seat in the empty chair placed beside her mother's bed, quickly removing the backpack from her shoulders and placing it down beside her in the process.
"Mom, it's me..." Feyre trailed off, her voice barely above a whisper. "It's Feyre. I'm here," She called out to the woman quietly. A small part of the girl had hoped her mom would hear her voice and suddenly wake up. It would be declared a miracle and everything would go back to normal.
However, when Rosalind Blanchard remained still without a single movement, or a raise of heartbeat on the monitor next to her, Feyre felt her hopes and dreams become nothing but a pile of ash all over again. Sniffling quietly, Feyre leaned down to her bag and unzipped it. "I brought you something," Feyre muttered, and retrieved the old stuffed bear from the bag before placing it next to her mom. "You always said to me that I would be safe in my dreams if I had him. I can't stay long so I wanted you to have a piece of me just in case..." Feyre couldn't even bring herself to say those words out loud.
It was in that moment Feyre Blanchard realised she wasn't ready for this, for any of this. She didn't want to say goodbye to her mom, or be forced to bury her in the dirt six feet under a couple of weeks from now. She didn't want any of that. But this was unfortunately something she had no control over. This caused for Feyre to reach forward and grab her mother's frail hand with her own, giving it a gentle squeeze. "I'm sorry I wasn't here for you. If I had been then maybe I could've fought off that monster. And I'm sorry for the things I said the last time we talked. I didn't mean it. I know you just wanted to keep me safe," She rambled, allowing the tears to fall down her cheeks.
"It's okay. If you're trying to hold on for me, it's okay to let me go. I want you to get through this more than anything, but if you're ready to go, then go," Feyre told her mother softly, her voice cracking in the process. "You don't have to stick around for me because I'll be okay. I won't be alone. I'll have my sisters, my friends, Luke...Mom, I'll be alright. You don't have to be in pain anymore," Feyre explained, saying all the things her mom needed to hear if by some miracle she was listening to her voice.
But deep down Feyre felt like her heart was being ripped violently from her chest, being forced to plan the rest of her life without her mom at her side. But if the woman was ready to leave after all the sacrifices she's made for her daughter, then Feyre had no choice but to be the selfless one this time around.
Feyre wiped away the salty tears from her cheeks. "I love you, mom," was the last thing Feyre said before she let go of her mother's hand and stormed out of the room, pushing past her father in the process, leaving him alone with the dying woman.
Apollo turned back to where Rosalind Blanchard lay still in the hospital bed, guilt, and grief washing over him like a tidal wave. Slowly, he approached her and took a seat in the empty chair where Feyre had been previously sitting, a lump lodged in the back of his throat when he saw the state she was in. Between the medical equipment and the way Feyre spoke to her seconds before, he felt all the emotions a mere mortal was supposed to feel. In that moment, thousands of memories he shared with Rosalind Blanchard began to flash through his mind, memories of them together playing like a supercut. He was immortal and lived a thousand lives, but nothing compared to the memories he had with her.
"Hey, baby..." Apollo whispered softly, grabbing her hand with his own and lifting it up to his lips, pressing a gentle kiss to her knuckles before he thought back to the last conversation they shared, wishing there had been more.
THEN.
Rosalind Blanchard felt her chest ache when she heard her daughter's sobs from her bedroom, knowing she had been the cause of it. She didn't defend her own daughter when the school principal was telling them she was a troubled child and needed to have more discipline in her life. Rosalind just took the blame and shouldered it all on her own like she always had been. She had been doing it for nine years, so there was nothing new about the responsibility of taking care of a child as special as Feyre. Rosalind gladly took on the weight of that job and loved her daughter through every nightmare, and any person who tried to darken her daughter's everlasting light and creativity. And normally Rosalind would know what to do under these circumstances.
However, it was different this time around because it was starting. The nightmares she could handle to some extent, but the mystical creatures and violent monsters was something that Rosalind just felt like was too much, even for her. The woman was warned about this moment. The moment when Feyre would start to act different and see things that only she could see because she was special. Rosalind believed it would be a lot longer before Feyre started to display behaviours such as this. But it was happening now and she had no idea how to control it, or slow it down, and that scared the woman most of all.
Rosalind was hoping to sweep this entire ordeal under the rug and bake Feyre's favourite meal. But as she stood there, dishing up the freshly baked mac 'n' cheese into two bowls, she felt her hands beginning to shake before she dropped the serving spoon back into the piping hot dish she just pulled out of the oven. Rosalind wanted to cry, scream, and then hug her daughter and tell her she was perfect no matter what. However, the fear of what the future held for Feyre loomed over Rosalind like a dark shadow and she didn't know what to make of it. And then she started to wonder if someone else might have the answers she was searching more than ever right now.
The woman pulled open one of the kitchen drawers and grabbed a box of matches, picking one out and scraping it across the edge of the small box, igniting the flame. Rosalind then stared down at her dinner, and with a shaky breath leaving her quivering lips, she dropped the burning match into the bowl. She then watched as the food displayed in front of her eyes began to burn while she stood there and hoped, hell, she even prayed for some sort of sign that he was close. That he was listening somewhere out there in the universe. That he would hear her call and come running when she needed him most of all. Rosalind knew it was naive. Every other time she called since the birth of their daughter, he was silent, and she was left alone, but this time had to be different. It just had to be.
And after Rosalind Blanchard let out a quiet sigh filled with defeat, believing she had gone another day ignored by the man who had claimed to love her, she was ready to call it a night. Then, all of a sudden, she felt a gust of wind blow out the burning bowl of cheesy pasta, followed by a quiet creaking of footsteps against the old wooden floorboards of the beaten down apartment. Rosalind didn't even need to be facing him to know he had heard her call and decided to show up when she needed him most of all. The feeling of his presence was enough to make Rosalind let out a shaky breath filled with relief, a stray tear rolling down her cheek while she tried to find the courage to face him for the first time in nine years.
When Rosalind turned around she felt her heart swell in her chest when she came face to face with Apollo again. He looked a little different than she remembered, but she could never forget his handsome features and his beautiful green eyes that made her heart soar. Even after all this time she was still just as infatuated by his mere presence like she was when they first met. "You came?" Rosalind then questioned, sounding almost surprised.
Apollo chuckled lightly, his hands behind his back while he slowly approached the woman. "You called," He reminded her.
"It doesn't normally work," Rosalind retorted in response. She wanted to force a smile in his presence, but the dull ache erupting occasionally in her chest was a gentle reminder that she didn't call Apollo here for a catch up. She needed him to help with their daughter. "It's happening, Apollo. I can handle the nightmares and her dreams of the future. But I can't do this. Feyre was suspended from school today because she believed she saw a half lion, half eagle creature," She explained further.
Apollo nodded, a quiet sigh leaving his lips. "I told you this was going to happen. She would start to see things that aren't actually there. If it's happening now, then it won't be long until she starts attracting monsters—"
"Then tell me what I'm supposed to do," Rosalind spoke up, cutting the man off with a frustrated look plastered across her face. "Because I need her to be safe. I need her to know it's okay to be different and I don't know how to do that," She added, desperation laced in her voice.
"There is a place where she could go," Apollo replied, and Rosalind already hated the answer. They had spoken about it once when Feyre was born, and she hated the thought of having to send her away. But judging by Apollo's expression, it was the only option for their daughter. "Camp is the best place for someone like her. There's a protective barrier around the grounds so no monsters can get inside. She'll be around other kids who are just like her. Rosalind, we talked about this when Feyre was born. You and I both know it's the best option for her," He elaborated, hoping to encourage the woman to make the right choice for their daughter's sake.
"You think I don't know that?" Rosalind snapped at the man, blinking away the tears that threatened to fall. "I know that camp will keep her safe. It's just..."
Apollo knew the woman wanted to get something off her chest, but it was like she was too afraid to say it out loud. "You can say it, you know," He encouraged.
"I don't think you'll like to hear what I have to say," Rosalind countered, knowing what she was thinking was hurtful in more ways than one.
"You can speak freely with me. You know that," Apollo reassured her, nodding his head as a sign that whatever she wanted to say, she could say it free from judgement or scrutiny.
Rosalind stared back at the man standing in front of her for a moment before she released a shaky breath past her lips. "When Feyre was born, you told me she was destined for greatness. You held her in your arms, looked into her eyes, and said she would be important one day. That means your family have already mapped out her life before she has a chance to figure out who she is. She's only nine. She's a child. And one day the weight of the entire world will be forced onto her by you and your family because she's of use to you," Rosalind explained again, wiping away a stray tear.
"But to me she's already important. She's my whole world," Rosalind continued to speak, a small smile tugging at the corners of her lips. "She's your daughter and she's going to be destined for greatness, like you've already seen. But she's also my daughter. She's kind. She loves animals, and watching old movies with me every weekend. She loves home baked mac 'n' cheese and getting milkshakes from the diner down the street. She loves music and she wants to learn to play the guitar."
Rosalind then swallowed thickly. "That's who our daughter is. And I want her to know who she is before she's forced into your world and told who she has to be to appease your family," She confessed. Apollo studied the woman's face for a moment before he nodded his head because he understood her reasons. Rosalind then let out a sigh. "But I just feel like I'm failing her," She admitted.
Apollo was quick to walk towards the woman until he stopped directly in front of her, his tall figure towering over her before he slowly reached up and tucked some of her raven black coloured hair behind her ear. "You are an amazing mother to our girl. Everything good about her comes from you. She doesn't realise it yet, but one day she'll understand everything you did, it was to keep her safe and protected," He reassured the woman, his gentle and sweet voice sending chills up Rosalind's spine.
Suddenly, Apollo rested his forehead against Rosalind's while he caressed her cheek with his hand, causing for the woman to melt underneath his touch, like all the stress and negativity had quickly subsided. Apollo grazed his thumb against Rosalind's soft skin, static electricity erupting between their skin-on-skin contact. "I hate this..." Rosalind breathed out, her voice shaky as her eyes fluttered shut. "I hate having to stay away from you," She continued to whisper.
"I know, my love. But Zeus is a little temperamental when it comes to you and Feyre. He believes it's better that I stay away from you both. I'm risking a lot coming here now. He would probably smite me where I stand if I'm not careful," Apollo replied. He then pulled away so he could now stare into Rosalind's gaze, their eyes meeting for a moment while he continued to caress her cheek. "But someday things will be different. We'll have the future I promised."
Right on cue, a loud rumble of thunder erupted from the sky above which was rare during the summer. It didn't take a genius to figure out that the god of the skies had found out where Apollo had scurried off to and was demanding his return home to Olympus. Rosalind let out a quiet breath, not saying another word when she realised the sad truth that Apollo would have to leave her and their daughter again. Apollo slowly leaned forward and pressed a gentle kiss to the woman's forehead while her eyes fluttered close again, allowing the kiss to linger against her skin for a moment before his presence disappeared.
And when Rosalind Blanchard opened her eyes again, he was gone.
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authors note.
ROSALIND AND APOLLO TRUTHERS RISE!!!!
I'm sorry this chapter took so long to get written and published. I spent last weekend in London with my friend and didn't really have the time to write. And I wanted this chapter to be as perfect as possible because I wanted to capture the love between Rosalind and Apollo and show you guys that they still have this deep and genuine love for each other even after years of separation.
But I hope it was worth the wait and that you enjoyed it. I'll be posting the next chapter some time next week and I think you guys will be very happy with it 👀🤭