"I hate this, I want to go home." Louis grumbled, throwing his chino pants covered leg over his thigh to get comfortable on the backseat of the Maybach he was sitting in for five hours already.
"I know, but you heard David. He doesn't accept a no and this will have consequences if you don't go through with it." Mallory argued from the other line of the phone for the thousandth time now. "Don't think too much, Lou. Try to relax and if you radiate the confidence you do in the office then everything will go just fine, trust me."
"Easy for you to say, but Harry will be there and Zayn. And Sheila who apparently still has some kind of obsession with me even after such a long time." Louis huffed annoyed.
"Can't blame her." Mallory chuckled. "I know you'll be just fine. Don't worry so much and I highly doubt they will do anything. I'm still not okay with how they treated you and I hate them for it and I still want to smash their heads with a baseball bat, but I'm convinced they started using their brains now and think of what they did and what impact that had on so many things, especially Harry."
"But still." Louis grumbled.
"You're sounding dangerously like Madison when she's trying to argue and you're a grown up man, so get yourself together and don't whine like a baby." Mallory said sternly. "You didn't want to get rid of him when you had the chance to, now you have to live with your decision and as for the others you are still their boss and you're not going to be alone with anyone if you don't want that."
"You're mean." Louis muttered.
"I'm not mean, Lou." Mallory laughed. "You know I'm right. If you're not feeling well call me and I'm gonna come and support you, but try it at least and don't always think the worst, okay?"
"Fine." Louis huffed. "I still hate this."
"I know. Text me when you arrived, yeah? I gotta go." Mallory chuckled and waited for Louis to agree reluctantly before hanging up.
Louis tried to get out of this -in his opinion- stupid team training he had to participate in as well which he didn't understand in the slightest, but after a lot of arguing with David he had no choice but to go through with it so here he was now getting driven by a transport service David hired to Berwick-upon-Tweed to spend three days with eleven of his employees- he was glad at least Laura was there as well after he insisted that he needed his assistant.
When they reached the small east coast town the sun was slowly setting and when they rolled onto the parking lot of the Berwick holiday park everyone was there already waiting for him. He hated that because they were waiting just for him and suddenly he knew it was a bad idea being late on purpose.
He looked out of the window seeing a pool of people, but as if it was natural he could only focus on one and he hated it. It was the same every time and no matter how often he told himself it was accidental, that he didn't care, deep down he knew it wasn't and one severe reason was their kiss two weeks ago. Harry was standing on the right end of the group a little aside from the others with Zayn seemingly in conversation and he couldn't take his eyes off him. He couldn't interpret what he was feeling every time he took him in, but he despised it. And he despised that he still- even after everything, after he ruined his life twice, ripped his heart out twice, and made him fall for him twice- couldn't not care about him.
"Sir?" The driver brought him out of his rigid and he shook his head quickly.
"Yeah, thank you." Louis smiled abstinently.
Once he climbed out of the car a gust of wind hit him and he was glad he decided against a button up and wore a turtleneck instead which was covered by his warm coat he was pulling on now to tighten it around his figure.
"Good afternoon." He greeted the group when he approached them with quick steps and received such in return. "Why are you outside? It's freezing." He cringed.
"To wait for you, Mr. Tomlinson." Sheila chirped with glistening eyes.
"I see." Louis smiled tight lipped with a nod. "Alright, shall we go inside? Laura do you have the reservations ready?" He turned to his assistant now who grinned at him and held up a card.
"Already checked us in. Here's your room key." She said and Louis took the card with a frown.
"Room key? I thought we have to stay in those caravans." He said and pointed to the overall fifty caravans that were standing on the huge property behind the main building where the dining room, the bar, the reception, the inside and outdoor pools were located.
"We do, but Mr. Evans booked a separate room in the main building for you." Laura said.
"Mhm, okay." Louis said still with that same puzzled expression on his face, but on the inside he was relieved that he at least had a proper hotel room where he didn't have to be on his own entirely when other people were in the same building as him. He was already worried being on his own for three days- two nights- in case he had one of his bad moments, but that calmed him down a lot now. "Alright. I have no idea what to do now to be honest so I guess we-" He started with pursed lips, but stopped when Laura grinned at him expectantly and he knew that look on her face, gesturing for her to take the word.
"Luckily I know." She chuckled and looked down at a sheet of paper in her hand. "We're supposed to meet the trainer who will accompany us the next three days in half an hour for an introduction round where he will explain everything to us. Until then you can go unpack and settle into your caravans."
Soon everyone was in their temporary homes unpacking. A few days ago a list went around for the people who were participating, being asked if they wanted their own caravan, but it was clear for Harry and Zayn that they wanted to share one.
"Are you alright?" Zayn wondered once he plopped down on the two seater couch in the small living area.
"Yeah, sure." Harry muttered, rummaging through cupboards to see what was stored in them.
"You know I know when you're lying." Zayn noted and Harry sighed deeply.
"I don't know. It's bugging me and I hate that I can't do anything." He huffed and plopped down next to him.
"I mean, you could." Zayn shrugged. "Maybe now you get your chance."
"I respect his decision." Harry said immediately. He was relieved to be able to talk to him about that now since they started to have a proper friendship which contained communication and trust, but it still hurt talking about what he lost.
"I get that, but-"
"No, not 'but'. I fucked up and now I have to live with it and regret it for the rest of my poor life." Harry interrupted him harshly.
"If you say so." Zayn sighed. "But you're not making it any better if you're pitying yourself."
"Shut up." Harry grumbled.
"You're right, you should move on. I'm sure Sheila has better chances than you, she doesn't have a poor life like you." Zayn smirked just to piss him off and he was successful when Harry's head shot over to him and if looks could kill he would've been dead.
"Fuck you." Harry hissed.
"Why? I'm just trying to find the right thing to say because apparently everything is wrong." Zayn laughed.
"Because you're making fun of me while I'm having a major life crisis." Harry grumbled and got up. "Should've gotten my own caravan, you're already getting on my fucking nerves."
"Dramatic bitch." Zayn said with an eye roll when Harry stomped out of the room.
The main building of the 'Haven' had a large conference room that was mainly used for team building trainings where the group was seated in a circle now, including their trainer Pedro who looked into the round after a few welcoming words.
"Is there any superior present today?" He asked.
Everyone looked at Louis expectantly who was half slumped in his chair and not really interested, but sat up more proper and forced a small smile on his face.
"That would be me, then." He mumbled.
"I guessed that already." Pedro grinned.
"Actually, on a second thought, she is..." Louis pointed to Laura who gasped. "She is responsible for all of this and the planning and all that."
"He's the CEO, I'm just his assistant." Laura grinned that grew even wider when Louis shot her a glare, knowing he didn't actually mean it.
"Oh, that high of a position." Pedro said with impressed eyes. "Okay, then. I have one request which I'm not sure you like, but during the time you're staying here I want each of you calling each other by their first names."
"Including me?" Louis pointed at himself surprised. He didn't see that coming and just as Pedro said, he wasn't sure if he liked it.
"Yes. This is a team building training and there's no point in doing so if everyone addresses you with 'Sir' or Mr. whatever." Pedro said knowingly. "So what's your first name?"
"Rudolph." Louis said without hesitation and a serious facial expression.
Laura instantly slapped her hand on her mouth and leaned forward to hide the laugh, but she wasn't the only one and Louis couldn't suppress a grin either now.
"Seeing the reactions I don't quite believe you." Pedro said with a raised eyebrow but an amused twitch of his lip.
"Sorry. My name's Louis." Louis chuckled.
"Are you sure?" Pedro asked.
"Pretty much, yes." Louis smiled. "I can show you my ID if you want to."
"No need to, I believe you." Pedro chuckled. "Okay, then. For the next three days everyone will call you that with no exception."
"But I'm not even participating in the trainings, I'm just here to get to know them better." Louis argued.
"I am aware, but still. This is the rule."
"Why don't you participate?" Sheila asked curiously, but the disappointment on her face was visible.
"Because I'm the boss." Louis grinned at her, but he should've known it was a mistake of him when she gasped and blushed instantly, dropping her head.
He shot Laura a look who simply giggled in her hand knowing what he was thinking. They had a few conversations about Sheila already and she found it highly amusing how smitten she was for Louis and she thought back to the one time Sheila was in Louis' office to discuss her retraining where she was ready to jump up and call an ambulance being sure she'd faint, but surprisingly she made it out of the office again relatively fine- for her standards.
Louis was glad he didn't have to participate when he saw the first two tasks they had to do and he could relax and watch them. That was the compromise why he even went through with it, making it clear to David that he wouldn't do that. He reasoned it with still having to work while he was there so he couldn't possibly be fully present with his head. In reality he was terrified of embarrassing himself and being the laughing stock of the company and had one or two breakdowns at home because of it before he could convince David. So he was more than relieved when he told him it would suffice if he was there to get to know his employees better and vice versa.
In the evening when Louis was just on his way to dinner his phone rang and Madison's name popped up. Louis frowned seeing the time because usually after six they took the phone from her.
"Hi, darling." He greeted.
"Hi, dad!" Madison chirped. "How was your day?"
"It was good, I miss you though. How was school? Did anything exciting happen?" Louis wondered as he stepped into the dining room where everyone else was seated already and he sat down next to Laura and shot her a grateful smile that she kept a seat for him. Much to his dismay Harry was sitting opposite of her- and of him as well- and if he had to bet he was sure he did it on purpose.
"No, nothing. When are you coming home?" Madison asked although she knew the answer already. She still hoped he'd come back sooner.
"In two days, love." Louis said softly.
"I miss you too." Madison said with a thick voice and Louis suppressed a sigh, knowing how hard it was for her.
"I know, but it's not for long, you know that." He said appeasingly. "You should put the phone back before mum notices anything, okay?"
"How do you know she didn't allow me to?" Madison asked surprised.
"Because I know you. Don't give her a hard time, okay?" Louis checked and Madison agreed, telling him she loved him. "I love you too, darling. Good night."
Once they hung up Louis sighed deeply.
"Everything okay?" Laura asked.
"Yeah." Louis muttered. "Maddie is just having a hard time with me being away now."
"Oh, no." Laura breathed out compassionately. "Why's that? Is she okay?"
"Dunno, probably just being in a difficult phase right now. She's incredibly clingy and stuff. It's not making it better that I'm working so much." Louis chuckled sadly.
"Maybe you should work a bit less then." Laura smiled knowingly.
"Tell that our clients." Louis laughed. "Maybe I should consider adjusting the company structure. What about another assistant? Or someone to specifically take over the stock market, that would be a huge relief for me."
"Why don't you combine the stock market responsibility with the appointment of the deputy managing director?" Laura suggested.
"Laura?" Louis hummed and waited for her to turn to him curiously. "That's an amazing idea! I'm gonna have a call with Mr. Evans as soon as we're back and I'm gonna give you full credit for that."
"Louis, you don't have to-"
"I don't care." Louis grinned.
Harry always liked Laura, she was sweet and kind to everyone and her personality was one of those you couldn't not like, but seeing her talking to Louis so casual now as if they were best friends bothered him more than he wanted to admit. He felt the need to find out if they were more than colleagues, but while he was watching them during dinner he noticed something else that worried him more than anything else.
Louis barely touched his food that was placed in front of him and on a second thought Harry hasn't seen him eating properly at all- not when they didn't talk yet, not when they were friends and more, not since then. Until now all he ate were small bites of his food or a snack, but that was it. The thought of not having noticed that before made Harry feel sick an he was suddenly not hungry anymore. Could it be that Louis had trouble eating? Was it because of his struggles? What even was going on with him? What exactly were his struggles?
One thing led to another and Harry was trapped in a spiral and questions he didn't have an answer to and he was ashamed that he never properly thought about them earlier. He remembered Louis' arsenal of pills, his fragments of stories from his past, his uncontrolled emotional outbursts and lastly his absence for weeks after trying to take his life. Were all these things connected?
Harry tried to fight against the most obvious answer to that, not wanting to believe it, but as much as he thought of another explanation, an easier and less painful one, he couldn't find one. He didn't notice how he was staring at Louis the entire time and he didn't notice Louis caught him and stared right back at him either- only when Zayn nudged him and leaned over to him.
"Harry, stop staring at him." He hissed quietly.
"Huh, what?" Harry shook his head quickly, looking at his best friend perplexed.
Zayn just shot him a look which Harry didn't get and he simply shrugged it off and turned back, but his breath hitched when Louis was still looking at him with slightly squinted eyes as if he was trying to figure out what Harry was thinking of.
"What?" Harry dared to ask quietly without breaking eye contact.
"Nothing." Louis breathed out.
They continued staring at each other when suddenly and without any kind of warning Louis shot up from his chair and hurried out of the room as if he just remembered something urgent and Harry was left there sitting at the table looking after him baffled on what the hell just happened.
Louis didn't want to leave his room anymore after he saw something in Harry's eyes that made him shut down entirely and he just wanted to crawl under his duvet and cry and he didn't even know why. He had no idea what triggered him so much, but as he was pacing up and down the room with shaking hands and his fingers being in movement all the time unable to keep them still he thought he was going crazy.
It took him hours until he could get the shaking of his body under control, his clothes were drenched in sweat and after a much needed shower he felt better. His mind was still running, but he felt calmer and more balanced so he felt like he was ready to call Mallory now.
"Hey, you." She greeted after the second ring. "How are you?"
"Better. Had a strange panic attack or something, not as bad as usual but...I don't know. But I feel alright now." Louis explained shortly.
"I'm glad you are and that you were able to get through this on your own, though you could've called me."
"I know." Louis smiled gratefully. "So, uhm...I'm about to go to sleep..." He said quietly.
"Alright, then." Mallory said and a second later there was a beeping sound in Louis' ear and he took it off to see an incoming FaceTime call from her. He accepted and sighed relieved when he saw her face on the screen.
"You really don't have to. I'll manage." Louis said with a shaky voice, not wanting to be a bother to her, but he was still glad she assured him to help him through the evening right before going to sleep so he wasn't alone.
"Don't be silly and get in bed now." Mallory smiled and Louis did that, his camera shaking when he got under the duvet and turned on his side with one hand squeezed under his cheek.
"How was your day?" Louis asked and from then they made small talk and Mallory could see him getting tired, his eyes getting droopy.
He was just about to fall asleep when a blast of wind tore open the window making Louis jump.
"What was that?" Mallory asked worried.
"Just the wind." Louis rubbed his eyes and sat up. "Lemme just close the window."
He walked over to the window and closed it, just wanting to turn back around when he saw Laura sitting outside of her caravan on the steps with her arms thrown around her legs and her head dropped.
"Hey, Mal?" He asked as he slowly brought the phone up with a frown.
"What's wrong?" Mallory asked.
"Uh, I don't know." Louis said with a deep crease on his forehead. "Can I call you later? I have to check something real quick."
"Yes, sure." Mallory said confused. "Are you sure everything's alright?"
"Yeah. I'll tell you later, yeah?" Louis asked and Mallory nodded before he hung up and got dressed in the first things he found- grey sweats and a red jumper.
Once he was outside the lashing wind crawled under his clothes and he shivered visibly. He threw his arms around himself and hurried over to the caravan and even from afar he could hear Laura crying.
"Hey." He said softly when he sat down next to her and she flinched in surprise, but quickly wiped her tears. "What happened?"
"N-nothing." Laura croaked out and pulled up her nose.
"You know you can talk to me, even if it has nothing to do with work." Louis said with a nudge against her shoulder.
"I know, it's just..." Laura broke off when another wave of tears overcame her and Louis forgot about all professionalism when he pulled her in his arms and rubbed her arm letting her cry against his shoulder.
"It's okay." He whispered. "Do you want to go inside and you tell me what happened?" He suggested and Laura nodded weakly.
He helped her inside and once she was sitting on the small couch Louis draped a blanket over her shoulder and took a seat next to her. He didn't say anything not wanting to pressure her, so he just sat there and comforted her quietly.
"I'm so sorry, I didn't want to bother you or make you feel like you have to-" Laura burst out crying once more and dropped her face in her hands. "-this is so inappropriate, I'm sorry!"
"It's not, Laura! I promise, it's not! I'm here because I want to help you, to listen to you and whenever you're ready you can talk to me and if not then that's fine as well. Okay? I want to be here." He said determined.
It took another ten minutes until she was calm and from then she was just staring ahead.
"How do I tell this my boss?" She mumbled abstinently.
"Don't think about that right now. I'm not your boss at the moment." Louis assured.
"I'm pregnant." Laura blurted out. "And I told my boyfriend and he left me. I'm on my own and I have no one. I don't know what to do!"
Without saying anything Louis scooted over and pulled her in his arms once more, holding her tightly as she broke down completely and drenched his jumper with tears.
"Laura, look at me." He said softly, but determined. Once she was looking up at him with red and puffy eyes he gently grabbed her jaw to keep her from looking away. Because he knew she wanted to. "I won't let you deal with this on your own, okay? I will support you with everything you need, no matter what it is. You're not alone and I won't ever leave you alone with this. Do you understand that?"
"W-what?" Laura sniffled perplexed. "N-no, yo-"
"Uh-uh." Louis shut her up with one look. "I mean it." He said seriously. "Whatever you want to do, whatever you need I will support you. You are not on your own. Never!"
"Thank you! Thank you so much, but you don't have to! This is too much to ask and you're my boss and I'm just a nobody and annoying and, and, and-" She broke off when another outburst hit her and Louis couldn't help but chuckle at how adorable she was. "Don't laugh at me!" She hiccuped.
"I'm not laughing at you." Louis chuckled. "Gimme your phone and come here." He said and opened his arm once more waiting for her to hand him over her phone without questioning it. "Here. That's my private number. Whenever you need anything and no matter what time, you call me, alright?"
"No, I can't-"
"Laura." Louis said with raised eyebrows.
"Okay." She breathed out. "Thank you so much."
Louis stayed for a little longer, they talked after she calmed down and he waited until she was asleep before he left the caravan quietly, making sure not to be seen to not start any rumors- that was the last thing he needed now.
When he was back in his room the first thing he did was slumping down on the bed, processing what Laura just told him and he fervently hoped she would take up on his offer and call if she needed him. He felt sorry for her and he knew how hard that was because he knew that situation already. His first thought was that he wanted to help her because she reminded him of Mallory, but on a second thought he realised how much he actually cared about her and how important she became to him throughout the last year. Even with her only twenty one years of age she was incredibly mature, intelligent and without her Louis knew he would've gone down already, so there was no doubt he'd be by her side now.
He got once more disturbed before he had the chance to call Mallory back, this time by frantic knocks on his door. He didn't think much of it when he strolled over to the door and ripped it open expectantly, just wanting to get it over with whatever the person on the other side of the door wanted so he could finally go to sleep, but he wasn't prepared for what was about to happen.