"Life is hard. Then you die. Then they throw dirt in your face. Then the worms eat you. Be grateful it happens in that order."
- David Gerrold
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My mind raced too fast for me to catch up.
Merrill gave me a sympathetic smile and disappeared, leaving me alone to think about his words.
My sister was dead. Gemma, the always smiling woman, was dead.
The odd thing? I didn't feel like I should feel after hearing about her death.
After all, it meant she would be here soon. I would see her again, and I would be able to talk to her again. She will meet Elaine, and maybe those two will get along.
I hoped they would get along. Just imagining my sister not liking my girlfriend, my soulmate, was making me feel unwell.
But for Gemma, none of this was ideal. She had left mum behind, and she wouldn't have the opportunity to go back to earth whenever she pleased.
My thoughts ping-ponged in my head without any order. They weren't making sense. A few words would try to push their way to the front, only to be pushed back again by another thought that tried to surface.
The thought that eventually won the upper hand made me smile. I would see Gemma again and be able to talk to her again.
In Shimmerland, the death of a beloved one had a different meaning. On earth, it meant you would never - as far as the living ones were concerned - see that person again. For us dead souls, it simply meant we would see the person again.
I would see Gemma again.
"Elaine!" I called with a sudden outburst of glee. I placed my hands on her shoulders and gently shook her shoulders, trying to wake her up.
She stirred in her sleep and batted my hands away, before slowly opening her eyes. Blinking twice, she squinted her eyes as she saw my face only inches away from hers. "What?"
I chuckled at her grumpiness. "We have an assignment!"
"What?" She repeated, her voice void of emotions.
"We, my dear, have a new assignment which means there is a soul out there we need to catch," I explained, even though she knew exactly what I was talking about.
"Wait," Elaine finally said, yawning lightly, before sitting up on her hands. "What?"
I rolled my eyes and shifted my weight until my legs were dangling over one side, my feet pressed to the ground. The thin blanket slipped from my body as I stood up, snatching my boxers from the ground and putting them on before facing Elaine again.
She looked so angelic and sweet, her hair messy from the little sleep she was able to catch, and the thin blanket wrapped tightly around her, giving me a perfect view of her hardened nipple.
My eyes focused too long on them and when I finally looked up to meet her gaze, I found that she had been watching me the whole time. Smiling sheepishly, I shrugged my shoulders. "We have a new assignment, so get dressed and let's go!"
"Why are you so cheerful?" She asked warily.
I opened my mouth to reply and tell her who our new soul was, but my words got stuck in my throat as Elaine threw the blanket aside and slowly stood up. She wandered around the bed in her naked glory and stepped right in front of me, kissing my cheek and then leaning down to grab her underwear.
"I-" I tried talking, but had problems to gather my thoughts.
My eyes followed the curve of her breasts before they were hidden from my view. A black shirt was thrown over her upper body and she shimmied into a pair of dark skinny jeans.
I suspiciously eyed the t-shirt she was wearing. "Is that mine?"
She nodded with a grin. I watched as she lifted the hem of it and put a knot in the fabric so it didn't fall over her butt anymore but still covered her stomach.
"So, what exactly-" Elaine began talking, but I paid no attention as she lifted her arms to push her hair back and tried to ease some knots, only to reveal a thin strip of her stomach. The shirt didn't cover her fully, in that case.
Something inside me snapped. Like the switch of a light, I lost control.
Stepping forwards, I put my hands on Elaine's waist and immediately captured her lips with mine. Elaine was clearly taken by surprise as she lost balance and fell backwards on the bed, tugging me down with her.
Still, I never disconnected our lips. Mine moved feverishly against her, my tongue invading her mouth without hesitance. I trapped her lower lip between my teeth and pulled lightly before releasing it, letting it snap back into place.
Elaine's fingers ran up and down my back and finally settled on my shoulders as I started kissing her neck, my lips ghosting over the hickeys I had left on her soft skin. Just as I was about to deepen some and leave new ones, Elaine pushed against my shoulders, stopping me from going further.
Worried, I pulled back and sat up, looking down at her to see what was wrong.
Her lips were parted in a surprised 'o' and her breathing was shallow while her eyes glinted with joy. Nevertheless, she shook her head and sat up as well. "Harry."
The way my name left her mouth made me wonder what I had done wrong. There surely wasn't a line I had crossed - after all, we had done far more than kissing already.
"Wasn't there an assignment waiting for us?" She asked, her voice only loud enough for me to hear her.
"Assignment?" I asked dumbfounded for a moment, before realising why I had woken her up in the first place. "Oh my gosh, yes! The assignment. Gemma!" I exclaimed, making her jump from the sudden noise.
Seeing as Elaine was already dressed and I was still in only my boxers, I put on the first shirt I could find and squeezed into my favourite - and probably only - skinny jeans before pulling Elaine on her feet and making her follow me to the bridge.
The whole walk was silent, Elaine only eyeing me as if she waited for an explanation. When she realised I wouldn't give her one, she started speaking. "Gemma?"
I nodded. "My sister."
The endless field came in sight, but Elaine stopped before our feet hit the grass. "Your sister?"
When I had mentioned her name before, Elaine probably had thought I was talking about a random Gemma. I twirled around to come face-to-face with her, noticing the little frown between her eyebrows. "My sister," I repeated, confirming it.
"How... how are you feeling about it?" She asked, uncertainty lacing her voice.
I shrugged my shoulders. "I'm excited to see her again. We've always been really close. I'm also sad for her, because... well, you know." I didn't have to elaborate, Elaine knew what I meant.
"Do you know how she ... died?" Her voice dropped to a whisper on the last word.
I shook my head. "But I'm sure we'll find out now."
I dodged further questions by quickly hurrying across the field to the bridge, not waiting for Elaine to catch up with me.
Once on the other side, I was mildly surprised to end up in my old bedroom. Instead of looking closely at the minor changes my mother had made, I left the room and wandered through the hallway, calling out Gemma's name.
"Harry," Elaine hissed behind me, finally having caught up. "Don't avoid me."
Smiling apologetically, I didn't give her a reply. "Gemma? Where are you?"
"Harry?" This time, it wasn't Elaine's soft voice questioningly calling my name. No.
I spun around, too quickly for Elaine to register what had happened. She bumped into me and I steadied her by her shoulders as I looked over them to watch my sister appear out of the bathroom.
Dressed in nothing but a towel.
My eyes immediately fell on the rather large laceration on her head, the blood dripping down to leave a trail behind her.
I dropped my arms to my side, leaving Elaine enough space to face my sister as well. My mouth opened to let some words escape, but it seemed as if I had lost my voice. I couldn't help but to just stare at Gemma, not knowing what to say.
As it turned out, I didn't have to say anything.
My sister rushed forward, arms outstretched, and as soon as her intentions became clear, Elaine stepped aside. Gemma's body collided with mine as she wrapped her arms around my neck, hauling me forward into her.
Shocked, I numbly put my arms around her lower back, gently hugging her back.
I met Elaine's gaze, frowning at the sad smile on her lips. Tears brimmed in her eyes, but I shook my head, not wanting to witness her crying. She bit her lip and nodded, blinking rapidly to make the tears disappear.
"Oh, Harry," Gemma cried, her body shaking with silent sobs.
"It's all right, I'm here," I tried to comfort her, my hands rubbing up and down her back.
Minutes passed achingly slowly, but eventually, Gemma pulled back to look at me with red eyes, her cheeks wet from the tears she had cried. "You look different but then again, you don't. Your hair is a little longer, and you're..." Her voice faltered for a moment, until she finished her thought, "and you're happy."
In that moment, I was certain my head would explode. Everything was happening too fast, and it seemed like only minutes ago that Merrill had told me about a new assignment.
The world was spinning, constantly pushing forward, and I couldn't stop it.
"And you're the reason," Gemma continued, facing Elaine. I noticed that her eyes, so similar to mine, fell on the black t-shirt Elaine was wearing. It didn't take a genius to figure out it was mine. Or that I left the hickeys on Elaine's neck.
Surely not the first impression Elaine had wanted to make, but I knew that Gemma didn't mind. Once she saw the two of us interacting together, or once we had a private chat and I could fill her in on everything, she would understand. She would understand that Elaine was the one for me, my person.
Elaine was taken aback by my sister's words and looked at me with wide eyes, silently pleading me to help her out. As I didn't know how, I began to state the obvious. "Gemma, you're only wearing a towel."
Both girls looked at me like I had grown another head, the topic change coming out of nowhere.
"I mean... please don't tell me you tripped in the shower and hit your head. That's probably the most stupid way to die," I said, my tone reproachful.
"Well," Gemma said, clearing her throat with a quiet cough, "I certainly didn't choose to die. It happened so quickly and then, out of nowhere, I was looking down at myself. I'm still in that stupid bathroom and mum has no idea I'm dead! She's going to lose her mind!"
My eyes twitched. "This is going to kill her," I whispered softly.
"Harry," Gemma said, standing right in front me, "your death has completely torn her apart. She was only slowly starting to heal again."
"It's not my fault that I had a car accident," I tried to defend myself, only to understand that Gemma wasn't trying to blame me. She was only worried about our mother. "Mum will learn to deal with it. She's strong, she can handle it."
"Handle both her children being dead? I don't think so."
I was silent, too stunned to say anything.
"How about we bring you to Shimmerland first and get you some clothes? And maybe treat your wound? Then we can talk about all of this and yeah, figure something out," Elaine suggested, her voice soft.
"Hang on, I don't even know your name," Gemma pointed out, the conversation about our mother momentarily forgotten.
I stepped around Gemma to wrap an arm around Elaine's shoulders, pulling her to my side. "This is Elaine, my girlfriend."
Gemma snorted. "You died and got a girlfriend. Mum would be so proud of you."
"Shut up."
"I'm serious. She really would be. Anyway, hi Elaine, nice to meet you. I'm Gemma," she finally said, addressing Elaine as she outstretched a hand.
Elaine hesitantly shook it. "Hi."
"I hope the two of you get along because there is no doubt in my mind that my darling sister will spend a few days with us," I mumbled.
"Okay, we'll drop her off at the Council Hall and then she can come with us," Elaine said, ignoring my words and smiling at Gemma. "No, wait. We'll go home first and get her some clothes, then she can go to the Council Hall." Thinking about her words, she nodded. "Yes, that's a better plan."
I smiled dryly at her. "When we're at it, we should also ask them if we're allowed to finally spend some time apart."
"Wanna get rid of me?" Elaine asked, raising her eyebrows.
I chuckled. "No. ... I mean, yes, that too, but I don't wanna be one of those couples that spend every single minute together."
"Not our fault, we were forced," Elaine pointed out. "And it worked well until now, didn't it?"
Gemma was watching our exchange like a ping-pong match.
"True," I agreed, pinching Elaine's side as I kissed her temple. She wriggled in my grip but couldn't escape. "Let's go."
On that note, the bridge appeared behind Gemma. She eyed us for a moment but then decided to trust us.
To be honest, I admired her courage. If I were her, I'd have more questions before I'd even consider agreeing to go anywhere. Especially dressed in only a towel.
But not Gemma. She trusted us - or more likely, me - and crossed the bridge, only looking over her shoulder to ensure that we were following.
By the grin on her lips, I could tell that there was a lot on her mind.
Also, by the twinkle in her eyes, I could tell that I would have to prepare myself for what was yet to come.
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A/N: I'm the worst at updating and I'm so very sorry about it. Thank you to anyone who's still sticking around!