I woke up very early. I lay there staring at the ceiling for a couple of minutes, then I looked at Della. She was still sound asleep. On a sober head, her words yesterday seemed more plausible to me. Maybe she's right? Maybe I shouldn't trust Aron and let him get closer? I just feel like if I give him a chance, I can turn a blind eye to the fact that he and she were... Oh, no, I can't. As soon as I thought about it, my fists started to clench on their own. I drew an image of Aron in my head and imagined plunging a knife right into his heart. Oh, how I wanted this... I wonder how long it will take he to turn? After 75 minutes, considering the height and age. Maybe a little longer... In fact, I could take him away from the ranch and put a bullet in his forehead there. Even if I were suspected, it is unlikely that anyone would openly accuse me. Although, of course, I don't think Della would have believed in such a happy accident....She would have left. No, I need to be a good guy so as not to ruin our relationship, they are already in a dangerous position...
I shook my head to banish thoughts of killing Aron. For some reason, I didn't want to get up at all. But I did it anyway. I went to the bathroom first. After brushing my teeth and washing my face, I looked at myself in the mirror. In fact, I haven't done this for a long time... it was strange to see my face. I looked a little tired and unshaven. So I decided to improve my appearance by at least getting rid of the stubble.
Returning to the bedroom, I looked around, put on a shirt and went to the window, it was open. The light morning freshness cheered me up. The ranch was still asleep, the grounds empty except for the guards.
I wanted to drink coffee. I decided to cook it for Della and me, bring it to her right in bed, it would be a great romantic gesture. The thought of romance made me shudder a little. Who am I turning into...? But it serves me right... Well, I have to show her that I can not only shoot, kill and drag her into the basement, otherwise she will stop loving me. I have to be careful. And I kind of want that. Yes, I definitely want to, it's just that I'm somehow unaccustomed to the role of someone who gives flowers and all that... By the way, it would be nice to get flowers again somewhere. Actually, there's an old lady at the ranch who grows something. At least she's done it before. Mrs. Clayton. She and her husband lived in the van they came here in many years ago.
I left the house and went to them. After a couple of minutes, I reached my goal and wondered: should I wake them up and ask politely or just pick flowers...? Oh, what have I come to?! I'm going to ask, seriously? But I can only pick a few flowers, and I don't want a few flowers, I want a whole bouquet. I want the best for her. And so I knock on the door... What a jerk I'll look like. I crossed my arms over my chest and rolled my eyes in anticipation. Mr. Clayton opened the door for me a couple of minutes later.
"Troy? Something happened?" The old man adjusted his glasses in surprise.
"Good morning. Yes... I mean, no, I just need to ask your wife something."
"Vanessa," her husband called, "come here, please."
Mrs. Clayton soon appeared, looking sleepy. She greeted me and looked at me a little embarrassed.
"Could you let me pick your flowers?"
"What?" the lady was surprised.
"You see, I want to do something nice for Adaline. And it seemed to me that..."
"Oh, Troy, you don't have to go on, of course, of course. I am so glad that someone finally paid attention to my beautiful roses! I just wanted to trim them today! Do you need it right now?"
"I wish," I shrugged.
"Okay, dear, I'm just going to get the scissors," she smiled.
After a couple of moments, a full-fledged bouquet appeared in my hands.
"So, this is the fifteenth, do you think you have enough?" Vanessa asked.
"Oh, I think so. I owe you one. Thank you."
"You know, it's good that you decided to give her flowers, Troy. And it's good that you asked for permission, and not just tore them off."
"To be honest, I hesitated," I winced slightly in anticipation of her condemnation. But it did not follow.
"I'm glad you're getting better. I used to think you were a little... how to put it mildly... not of this world... Don't be offended..."
"I'm not offended. I'm really trying to improve. Listen, can I ask you a question?"
"Come on!"
"Why do you grow them? Don't get me wrong, but it's a waste of time..."
"Flowers remind me of my home and the normal world... And this are also beautiful. And, as you can see, they are not so useless," the old woman grinned.
I thanked her again and ran into the house. Suddenly I was hailed.
"Hey, Troy! Can't sleep early in the morning?"
I turned around. Aron was there. He was standing next to the fence and smoking.
"Hi... Yes, I couldn't sleep."
"Is this for her?" He nodded at the flowers as he approached me.
"Well, not for you," I rolled my eyes.
"It's beautiful. But she won't appreciate it."
"What makes you think that?"
"She doesn't like roses," he spread his hands, "want?" Aron handed me a pack of cigarettes.
"I don't smoke."
"So, what are your plans for today? Will there be a sortie?"
"Actually, today is the day off for the whole squad. Only those in uniform are standing around the perimeter."
"I was hoping to have fun again by clearing everything of walkers..."
"I think you should meet the people at the ranch today."
"Okay... Have a nice day."
I nodded and went home in silence.
After putting the coffee on the stove, I started looking for cups. I wonder if she really doesn't like roses? Or did he lie? What does she like at all? What is her favorite color? What subject did she like at school? What is her favorite dish? And the music? A movie? I don't know anything about her at all! And that fucking Aron probably knows everything. I felt so disgusted when I remembered what he said about flowers... I wanted to throw them out the window. I almost did it, but the coffee boiled. Spit. I'll just bring flowers to her. And come what may!
I poured the coffee, put the cups on the tray, put some cookies in there, took the flowers in my other hand and went to our bedroom. Suddenly Nick appeared from the direction of the stairs. As soon as he saw me, an evil grin appeared on his face. He was about to say something, but I beat him to it.:
"Just say a word, Nick! And you will move to another house!"
He raised his hands and backed away, still grinning. I shook my head. Yes, it's unusual for me to be in the role of a romantic. Opening the door of the room with my foot, I entered and first of all put the coffee tray on the bedside table. Then I sat down on the edge of Della's bed and ran my hand through her hair. She opened her eyes after just a couple of moments.
"Troy?"
"Good morning!" I handed her the flowers, and my heart beat faster. I was embarrassed. I was ashamed...? No, is it even possible to believe it?! How strange it felt to me.
Her eyes widened and she propped herself up on her elbows.
"Wow!"
"Do you like it?"
"That's not the right word! They're great! But where did you get them?"
"A secret," I broke into a smile.
"Troy, they are very beautiful, I just love flowers... Thank you. It's so nice that I can't put it into words," she hugged me tightly, "is it just me, or do I really smell coffee?"
"Oh, yes... I made us coffee."
"Who are you? And where is my Troy Otto?"
"Oh, come on, I'm very versatile!"
"You're the sexiest man on the planet," she said, taking a sip of coffee, "I want you right now!"
I was so pleased to hear that she was pleased with me.
"Should we take a shower together?" She smiled playfully.
How sex with her drove me crazy. It was as if the human body was too good to feel it... When I was inside her, my brain was boiling. I was ready to cum before I even started... Her moans, her movements were so exciting that it seemed to me that I was on another planet. Everything about her turned me on. Her figure, her face, her lips and eyes... How I loved looking at her, touching her, possessing her.
I wanted to please her, I wanted to be the best lover for her. I wanted to make every moment of our intimacy unforgettable...
I remembered our first sex. Oh, that was unexpected. In fact, at that moment I didn't know if she liked me, I just wanted to possess her. I wasn't sure what she wanted, but I didn't care. I just wanted to take her because she looked like something I should have had. Yes, it's selfish, but at that moment I wasn't thinking about her feelings at all. I just fell in love and impulsively wanted her. Probably, if she hadn't agreed with my wish then, I would have taken her by force... It's hard for me to admit it. It's quite unpleasant to realize that I'm a bad person. But I would do it. I'm just glad I didn't have to...
***
"Don't you want to go for a walk?" I asked Della, lying on the bed. As always, she stayed in the bathroom longer, and we talked through the wall.
"Where to?"
"Well, we'll just go outside the ranch, take a little walk, talk and all that... Just you and me. Right now."
She peeked out from behind the door:
"This is something new, come on!"
We left about ten minutes later. The sun was already shining outside the window, although the day was just beginning. People were slowly going about their business. Someone was going to have breakfast, someone to the warehouse. Passing by the guards, we greeted the guys and said that we would be back soon. My mood couldn't be better.
"Look, Dell, I don't know anything about you at all."
"Come on, what important things can you not know?"
"Absolutely everything important I do not know. What are your favorite flowers?"
"I don't know myself, " she thought, "I like everyone... They're all wonderful."
"Let's say... What is your favorite color?"
"Probably blue. Although I can't say it's just it."
"What is your favorite movie? A book? A song?"
"It's too complicated, Troy... I didn't think about it for so long that I managed to forget. Actually, I love Harry Potter."
"God, are you serious?"
"Oh, Troy, well, I said it's hard for me to answer. My thoughts haven't revolved around such things for a long time. And "Harry Potter" is a great books! And movies. Not just for kids!
"Okay, what's your favorite dish?"
"Is this a compatibility test?" she laughed, "well, let's say... carbonara pasta!"
"And what subject did you like most at school?"
"Literature and History. And you?"
"I had biology before I was kicked out of school," I grinned.
"Well, and the color?"
"I don't know. I didn't think about it."
"Well, I know all about your favorite music... Heavy rock will save the world... What about books? And movies?"
"Okay, I've hardly read any books. Only if there is scientific literature, but it is difficult to single out a favorite there. Film... fuck knows. I can't say that I have one at all."
"What is this conversation about anyway? Do you think we're not close enough?"
"I just thought when I was walking home with flowers that I don't know anything about your tastes and preferences at all. But it's probably important..."
"Troy, actually, it's not that important right now. Now we live in a world where there is almost no time for this..."
"Well, you find time to read!"
"Rarely. In any case, there are many other things that are more important now."
"But still, it bothers me that I don't know some little things about you that he knows..."
"So is it because of Aron? Troy, come on!"
"I can't stop being jealous at the snap of my fingers! It doesn't work that way! In general, I have not yet come to terms with the fact that the person who is with you... who is with you, will now live next to us..."
"Tell me what you wanted to say in full. Who what...? "
"Who slept with you! Whom you loved and whom you once chose!"
She stopped.
"Troy, I'm not happy about the current situation either, but what should I do? Do you want to kick him out?"
"No. Don't want... Although no, to be honest, I really want to, but it's wrong, so I won't. He doesn't give us any trouble. Maybe someday I'll be able to come to terms with it... I don't know. I just want to have an advantage over him to feel more confident."
"Troy..."
"And don't tell me it's there! That's not true! You and I are going through a difficult period!"
"Troy, problems in our relationship will not push me into Aron's arms, be sure."
"I really hope so..."
"I love Britney Spears. You asked about music. In general, I'm a music lover. I like a lot of things about music."
"Do you have the same answer to everything?"
"It's just hard to choose one thing when there are so many good things around!"
"Oh, I hope it's not like that with men?!"
Della laughed. I caught her laughing...
I felt so good with her, so calm. She was my safety zone when we weren't fighting.
In fact, it's nice to have someone close. All my life before her it was as if I had no one. Of course, I believed in the illusion of family, but Della's support is so strong that I can't compare it with anyone else's...