Song - Fade Into a Dream by LEON
The next hour passes by in a blur. Before I know it, the rowboats are being lowered into the water.
I know I will have to face him, but I don't want to. I don't want to be a crying, sniveling little girl that fell in love with a stranger. Being with him all day, every day, made it all too easy to forget. He lives on the ship. I don't.
"Niamh." His voice is soft as he stands in my doorway.
I don't turn around because I can't. If I turn and look at him now, I won't be able to control the emotions that are threatening to spill out. My throat burns as I swallow down the lump that has been there all day.
"Niamh."
It feels like my chest has been cracked open. Mindlessly, I shove my few worldly possessions into my bag, anything to focus on the pain. This hurts worse than any physical injury I've ever endured.
His hand grips the back of my neck, spinning me around. My back hits the wall so hard that the air is knocked from my lungs. He attacks me with his mouth, his tongue taking over, leaving me with no choice but to let him take what he wants.
Tears spill down my cheeks so hot and heavy they burn my skin.
His hand fists my hair, pulling my head back, angling me however he wants. I don't resist, I don't have the strength to.
"Why are you crying?" His voice is so soft, he knows that one harsh word would crush me now.
"I-just-" I try, but a sob forces its way out instead.
"Niamh, look at me. We have to go get the bone-"
"Then you'll be off to Spain, I know." I feel the frayed edges of my heart hardening. Everything that was spilling out—the feelings, the softness, the fantasy—is now being pulled inward. I'm going to hide it away. I need to protect it. When he leaves me on the shore, I will be torn apart if I don't start pulling back now.
"I have to pack." I jerk myself away from him.
"Niamh," he sounds panicked. Maybe he was caught up too. Maybe the impending doom of our reality is only just dawning on him too.
His hand grips my arm, pulling to turn me, but the captain yells down, saving me.
"You should go," I don't turn to look at him. I can't. It hurts too much.
He hesitates for a moment, taking a step closer. His chest is almost flush with my back, I can feel the heat from his body.
"Silver!" The captain yells again.
When the door closes quietly behind me, I attempt to muffle the sound of my sobs with my hands. I know he feels the same connection, but everything feels tarnished. It isn't love.
I won't let him see me cry anymore. I let myself get too caught up in his beautiful eyes and strong arms. I'm alone in the world now. I've left my family and my home. I have to take care of myself.
Instead, I've fallen for the first handsome smile.
When I step out onto the deck, our eyes meet. As the row boat he was lowering crashes into the water below, he freezes, the rope in his hands slipping.
"Silver!" The captain screams as several other crew members shout angrily.
He jerks his head back, grabbing the rope tightly, trying to correct his mistake.
"I'll help you down," Big Jones steps forward, but Cooper comes out of nowhere, stepping in front of him.
"Don't touch her. I'll take her down." He growls, grabbing my arm roughly and pulling me forward.
"Don't rip her arm off, mate." Jones puts his hands up and steps back, but his voice is harsh.
Cooper only snarls and leads me away.
"Stay with me. When we get to port, I will carry you."
"Surely, I can walk-"
He turns, rage flickering in his eyes as a deep, rumbling growl vibrates in his chest.
Snapping my mouth shut, I tip my chin up and walk toward the side of the ship. He might be able to boss me around, but he can't make me be pleasant. He sure isn't.
The ride to the shore is long and uncomfortable. Everyone is on edge. Cooper's sudden foul mood seems to be affecting the entire crew. Even Mick and Potter are quiet.
I try to jump out of the boat when we finally reach the shore, but his arm wraps tightly around my waist.
The small fishing village is busy with people opening shops, ships bringing in fresh fish, and farmers arranging items for sale. Our burly group of giants stalks through the street. None of them stop to look at any of the interesting things in the stalls or storefronts. They don't seem to notice the way everyone cowers back from them, either.
But I do.
The women clutch their shawls, and the men try to hide the fact that they're looking at all. Children stare blatantly with wide-open mouths.
The crew doesn't care.
Cooper is holding my hand so tightly that I'm sure he's going to snap all the bones in my fingers. When the streets open into a small country lane with fields dotted with houses on either side, he scoops me up.
I'm breathless already, but I want to walk.
"I can-"
"No."
Pouting, I cross my arms and turn my head away.
When the sun is high above us, we stop by a thin stream. Everyone bends down to splash water on their faces and get a cool drink. Everyone but me. Cooper still hasn't put me down.
"Girl," the captain calls. "What did you bring for lunch?"
Turning to Big Jones, I reach for the bag he's already holding out. "Bread, salt pork, and boiled eggs."
Cooper sets me on my feet, slowly, like he's reluctant to do it.
Making my way to each crew member, I pass out their rations before slipping away to the stream. Dropping my bag, I slip off my shoes and roll my pants up to my knees.
"What are you doing?"
Groaning, I ignore him and soak my feet in the water.
"Niamh," he rumbles.
"Cooper, can you just let me be? Just for a moment?" I snap, turning back to face him.
His expression closes up as he turns and stomps away angrily.
As I quietly eat my bread, I wonder if I will be happy here. Maybe I can stay in the port village. I could probably be a barmaid. I've never done it before, but it can't be any worse than serving the crew.
I bite my lip, fighting the urge to cry.
I won't admit it out loud, but in my mind, fear creeps in, consuming my thoughts. Maybe my mother was right about me.
I gave my virtue to the first man to show me a bit of kindness. Now, he's going to leave me here, in a new country, all alone. I won't have him to help me, or protect me. Without him, I'm likely to starve, or worse.
Then, perhaps the most horrifying aspect of this cruel reality is knowing I'll never meet another like him. In a way that feels a bit like magic, I felt a tug in my heart the moment our eyes met.
Shouting pulls me away from my thoughts. As I rush back to the crew, I'm met with Cooper and Big Jones rolling over one another, fighting for the upper hand.
"Cooper!" I scream as he lands a blow to Jones' cheek.
Jones snarls and pushes him, rolling to force him to his back in the dirt. He doesn't waste the opportunity to throw his balled-up fist into his face twice. I can hear the sickening crack of bones from here.
The rest of the crew is watching the captain, waiting for him to allow them to intervene.
Before they have to step in, Jones pushes Cooper away, sending him back where he trips on a large rock. When he falls, Jones rolls his neck and storms past me toward the stream.
Cooper jumps up and starts to go after him, but I sidestep, cutting off his path.
"Move, Niamh."
"No," I fold my arms across my chest. Narrowing my eyes, I wait for him to try to brush past me, but he doesn't. Instead, he grabs my arm and yanks me away.
Further up the stream, in the shade of a large tree, he finally stops. Dropping my arm, he starts to pace angrily.
"What hap-" I'm cut off by his mouth on mine. My back is quickly pressed to the trunk of the tree.
"You're mine." The gravelly bark of his voice makes me shiver. "I will come back for you. Or- I-" he stutters. "One way or another, I will have you. Do you understand?"
Using my hands to force his face back, I look at the swollen, bloody skin around his eye.
"You're hurt."
"I'll be fine." His eyes burn into mine.
He shifts between my legs, pressing himself into the material of my pants.
"I'll come back," he whispers against my ear. "I'll find you. As soon as this shit is over, I'll come for you."
The desperation in his voice makes me want to believe him. To trust that this isn't the end of everything.
His teeth scrape against my neck as he inhales deep, ragged breaths.
"Cooper," my fingers slide through his hair, taking a tightly gripped handful at the base of his neck. "We should stop," the breathless whisper that I barely manage to choke out is lost in a moan as he starts to suck my skin between kisses.
"We're leaving, boy," the captain's voice makes us both freeze. The moment is ruined, effectively stomped dead before it had the chance to happen.
"Later," he groans, holding my chin tightly as he kisses me again.
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