"Get up! Get up!" Troy's voice was as if muffled. He lifted me off the floor, trying to pull me away from my sister. I couldn't move. A slap brought me to my senses.
"Hey Della, please, we don't have much time, it's time to go!"
Like a robot I began to do what Troy said. After washing the blood off my hands and face in the bathroom, I quickly grabbed my backpack and clothes. When I walked out into the room, I saw Troy stabbing Robert's head. I squeezed my eyes shut so I wouldn't see him do the same to Clara. But he must have finished with her first, because as soon as I appeared he screamed:
"Let's get out of here! We might have been heard!"
We went downstairs. We walked through the familiar square of El Bazaar. We entered a narrow corridor and ran through it to the entrance. All of this happened in a couple of minutes, I was uncomfortable in these shoes, so I couldn't hurry anymore once we were outside the gate. It was all a blur. I was in shock.
I don't remember how I got in, how Troy started the car, or how we drove. I woke up when it had been a long time, and we were in some woods. Troy stopped and looked at me. I looked up, too. His eyes were on fire. He was almost ecstatic at what had happened and got out of the car. I did too. We were silent for a while, then he looked at me.
"You look fucking great!" he said, examining me with a hungry look.
"Do you like that dress?"
"I like you, not the dress."
He pulled me to him and kissed me. I responded, but after a few minutes I pulled away. He realised the shock had worn off and I was starting to realise what had happened.
"Della, nothing is your fault. Remember this. She attacked you on her own. Besides, your sister was a rare cunt. She's the reason that scumbag attacked you. She's the reason you snorted coke, killed that guy in L.A. You deserved a holiday. She would have killed you herself if you hadn't killed her."
"Troy, I killed her... No, I really killed her. Is this real?!"
"Listen to me," he took my face with both hands, "we're not going to talk about this anymore. Ever. It never happened. Do you understand me? If you meet family, you tell them she's gone. She ran away. Just like before."
I nodded yes. Troy let go of my face.
"Where are we going now, Troy?"
"Let's try to find something new. By the way," Otto reached into his trouser pocket, "while you were there 'smiling' and 'batting your eyes', I didn't waste any time either", suddenly he handed me the watch.
"But how?"
"Very simple. I stole it. She didn't wear it. I guess it didn't fit her hand," he laughed.
I put on my watch. I felt calmer. I kissed Troy on the cheek.
"I love you so much, Della. My fists are still clenched... When I saw that freak on you... Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! I wanted to kill him so bad. I'm so happy because I killed him."
"Thank you for making it in time, Troy."
"I just felt that something was wrong. I just had a cramp in my chest. It's so disgusting to think that I might have been late... Baby, I'm sorry I let you go at all. I bought your words about the baby... What an idiot, I'm sorry I didn't keep you from this..."
"Troy, it's not your fault. I was just naive. And you were right about everything. You have no idea what they were saying, thinking I didn't understand. I'm so sorry I didn't bring my gun."
"Wait, what?! Did you go there without a weapon?! How could you?! Are you crazy?! I won't let you go anymore. I'm a complete idiot for falling for your persuasions and trusting you!"
"Troy, please, I'm sorry..."
"Come here," he put his arms around me and rested my head against his shoulder, "I love you so much, I was so scared for you, I've never been scared of anything, but this time my heart just squeezed.... I'm so scared of losing you."
I pressed against his shoulder. He was so strong and brave. I loved him very much. He saved me. We stood like that for a long time, until I was too cold in this dress. I decided to change into my usual clothes. And then we drove off again.
"What are we gonna do?"
"Why don't we try to get to Canada?"
"Why not Alaska?" I laughed.
I couldn't understand why I didn't care about Clara at all. I guess I hadn't realised it had happened at all. Maybe I didn't feel guilty because she almost got me raped by that arsehole?
"You shouldn't say that," Troy interrupted my thoughts, "when I was still at the military base, we had a connection to Canada. Things were relatively good there. Large areas, few people."
"Let's give it a try. But it's pretty far away."
"I know. But anyway, we'll go through the states. If we find something better, we'll stay there."
I nodded.
After a couple of kilometres, the road got dark. We noticed some movement up ahead. Troy thought it was a walker. I had a strange feeling it wasn't.
"Pull over, let's see who it is."
"Della, if it's not a walker, it's alive. Even more so better not to stop."
But still, Troy listened to me and slowed down a little.
"A dog! It's a dog, look! I haven't seen them in a long time!" he shouted, ahead of me.
Otto got out of the car. I loved animals, but I didn't get this excited at the mere sight of them. Troy surprised me. He started stroking the dog, and he started licking his hands. For some reason, I thought it was a boy.
"Get some food, Dell!"
I took some tinned food out of my rucksack and gave it to Troy. He opened them and put them in front of the animal, then turned to me with eyes begging like a child's. It's the way parents are persuaded to buy a kitten or a puppy. It was clear to me: Otto would take the dog. I smiled and nodded.
Troy opened the boot and moved the stuff into the cabin, making room for our new friend.
"I'll call you Khan," Troy stroked the doggie behind his ear as he ate.
Suddenly a man appeared from behind the bushes, I tensed up and shouted to Troy. He looked up.
"He already has a name. Oscar. That's my dog."
The man came closer and closer to us. Suddenly he stopped very close to us and stretched out questioningly:
"Otto?!"
"And who are you?"
"Don't you recognise me? I'm Lee. Mad Dog."
I was surprised by what I heard and got out of the car to see if it was true.
"What are you doing here? Why aren't you with Walker?"
"I left. I got tired of being his messenger. I'm a legend now," Lee nodded toward the dog, laughing.
"Everything good at the ranch?"
"Yeah, fine. Greetings to you from your loved ones," he nodded his head in my direction.
"Where you headed?"
"To El Bazaar. Thought I'd meet you there actually."
"There's nothing to do there. We just came from there. Unless you've got a couple of kilos of extra bullets, it's not worth going."
"Right, well. I'll check it out for myself anyway. I want to see for."
"Suit yourself," Troy made a blessing gesture.
"Where's Clara?" asked Lee indifferently.
Troy and I looked at each other.
"She decided to continue the search alone," I lied.
"I see," the Mad Dog stretched out without enthusiasm. It was clear he was just being polite, "Where are you going now?"
"To San Marino," Otto lied.
"What's there?"
"We don't know, we'll see."
"Well, see you later, mates. Good to see some familiar faces," Lee made a parting gesture and headed off, Oscar ran after him.
"Amazing meeting, of course, who would have thought it!" Otto shook his head.
"Don't feel bad, Troy," I put a hand on his shoulder.
"Why should I be?"
"Because of the dog."
"I wasn't upset, don't make it up!" he waved me off and walked to the car with assumed indifference.
I smiled to myself as I breathed in the fresh night air.
After driving a little more, Troy suggested making a stop. We came across some kind of supermarket.
"We'll spend the night there."
"I don't think we should get out of the car, Troy. There may be people here."
"We'll drain the gasoline and take everything from here."
I didn't argue. Otto drove closer to the entrance and parked. I went out and immediately came across a dead man — already a common thing. Without hesitation, I stabbed him in the head. The walker fell, literally crumbling into pieces.
We came to the entrance of the store. We decided to check first whether it was worth going there at all. Looking inside through the window, I realized that there was no one there. I opened the door and went in first. Suddenly, Troy pulled back my hood. I was already scared, but then I heard him grumbling:
"Why do you always climb ahead of me?! It can be dangerous!"
I made a face and mimicked him in a half-whisper. He just shook his head in response. I liked it when he pretended to be such a serious guy. It looked funny. Although sometimes, of course, he went too far with tyranny.
"Why are you such a bore?" after a couple of seconds, I asked out loud. Now it became clear for sure that there was no one in the room.
"I'm just worried about you", he chuckled.
"You're starting to look like a mother hen."
"What?" he turned around.
"What you heard. I'm not five years old, I'm not a child."
"You are everything to me in one person. And the child as well."
"Troy, it's not sexy."
"Della, what do you want?"
"I want to understand why you started behaving like this... So thoughtful or something..."
"Don't you like it?"
"I just don't understand you. You were different on the ranch."
"It's not a ranch. There I was sure that nothing was threatening you. Not anymore. Think for yourself how many things that could kill you have happened just these days. I don't want to lose you. More precisely, no. I'm afraid of losing you", he paused for a second, sighing in puzzlement, "for the first time I'm afraid of something. I can't even believe it myself. In general, I do not know what you think of me, and, frankly, I do not care."
"Troy..."
"Wait", he made a stopping gesture with his hands, "I haven't finished yet. Moreover. You left the ranch because of me. Although I didn't ask for it, but since you chose me, it means that I have to take care of you and be for you not only a lover, but also a father, mother, brother and friend, whom you left there, again because of me. And now a sister... In general, Della, think what you want. You may be angry, but I want to do everything so that you are safe with me. And I will do it. I understand that I can't replace your whole family for you, but I will try very hard. I value your life more than mine. And believe me, you're the first person I've ever felt that way about. I had no one but my brother and father, who didn't need me at all. Now I have you. I have nothing more important than you", he breathed.
It was difficult for him to speak. I kept looking into his eyes, they were so empty that if I hadn't heard what he was talking about, I would have thought that he definitely wasn't telling anything super important.
Troy's words were a revelation to me. I didn't think he was so sensitive. Before this speech, I was convinced that I love a tyrant and a psycho who just likes to mock me, who considers me his thing. But now...
All his confessions up to this point were pleasant, but I didn't take them seriously. It seemed to me that we were just together because we are so comfortable, and that's it.
Troy was generally quite impulsive in words. It was possible to divide in two everything that he said and desired at a certain moment, because it was unknown whether he really wanted it, he really thought so, or it was just a momentary impulse.
No, he wasn't a liar. The second he voiced something unusual, he really believed it. Then the tension subsided. For some reason, right now I didn't want to think about whether his words were true. Now I wanted to believe. But was it worth it? Of course not. You'll never be able to believe people's words. They are terrible manipulators. You need to look at the actions. And his actions so far have been much more revealing than his words. Judging by them, he was ready, if not for everything, then for a lot for me. So why not take his word for it now?
I suddenly wrapped my arms around his neck.
Troy laughed and in a second turned from a serious guy into a cheerful one.
"I just feel good with you, Troy. This has never happened to anyone before you."
"Because I'm the best... But seriously, Della, I'm sorry."
"For what?"
"For the way I sometimes behave."
"Are you talking about trying to strangle me?" I laughed. Actually, it was funny right now. Then not really.
"And about that too. I don't understand how you put up with it. I want to strangle myself for this later, when I let go. You know, something is covering me, but I'm not a bad person. I'm trying to fight it."
"I know."
He hugged me. His strong hands were so gentle. I pressed my ear to my chest and heard his heart beating.