The world was spinning, a kaleidoscope of bright colors slowly coming into focus accompanied by a wave of cold nausea as sound is the next to return. It was far away and growing closer, getting louder as the ringing in her ears faded.
"Annie! Annie, come back to us now. Come on, Sorellina. That's it."
"A..Alessandro..?" Annie blinks, eyes coming back into focus seeing the ghostly man kneeling over her with worry etched deep into his brow, worry that smooths away once she turns her eyes to him.
"Si, it is me. You gave us quite a fright. What happened?" He helps her sit up and she groans as her head throbs enough to make her stomach roll. He rubs his hand along her back in a soothing manner, his hand colder than ice even through the fabric of her dress and she shivers, shoulders tensing. "Ah, mi dispiace. I am cold and that might make you feel worse."
"It's not that. I don't… I don't like when people touch my back."
Instantly he withdraws his hand shooting her an apologetic look. "Forgive me. I just wished to offer some comfort, not make you uncomfortable."
"It's okay." Annie blinks and looks over at him with a small but warm smile. "What happened?"
"That is what I was wondering." He eases off his knees to sit next to her, one leg straight with the other bent and he leans against that one in a relaxed manner. "I was arguing with mio fratello and then he broke off his sentence and pointed to you. When I turned your head was thrown back and both your eyes and the book were both glowing white. I could not get your attention but you were not like that for long before the book slammed shut and you fell back."
Annie blinks and looks around, spying the book on the ground next to her open but the pages blank as memories of what she saw spring to the forefront of her mind. "Ma. She was in the pool. She told me to do something with the book, and I did, and then… I saw it."
"Saw what?"
"My mom. Her life from when she met my father to the night he abandoned her on the steps of the Ministry. I saw… things, but I'm just as confused. Alessandro, " she turns to him, confusion and worry deep in her gaze. "I'm… I'm not just human, am I?"
He's silent a moment before eventually turning away with a sigh and slight shake of his head. "No. You aren't."
"He had wings." Alessandro turns back to her as she pulls her knees to her chest. "Large feathery wings, like a bird. They came out of his back when he flew away. I've never seen anything like it."
"He's one of the last. The others like him, they've all been hunted down."
"That's why he kept saying it wasn't safe? Why it will never be safe for me if people were to learn about the blood I share with him?"
He nods, and a silence falls over them. Annie looks back over the pond, no longer as bright as the moon has begun its descent as tears build in her eyes and blur her vision.
"I still don't know what he was, but I'm scared, Alessandro. Scared for what that means for my future. For the future of those I love and care for. People have already gotten hurt and died because of me… Just being around anyone puts a target on their backs as well and I don't want that."
"Is anyone ever truly safe in life?" He sighs and runs his fingers through his hair, pulling it away from his face. "My brothers and I, we thought we were safe here in our home, surrounded by our ghouls and yet we were still killed. You and Lilit thought you were safe at your home, but you were found and captured. The covens thought they were safe yet they were attacked. Don't be your mother, Annie. Don't let your fear prevent you from living your life."
"How can I hold it back? Knowing what I know, knowing how badly I want to keep everyone safe but at the same time just being near me paints a target on them." She's repeating herself and she knows it but no other words come as she sighs and rubs her forehead before raking her palm down over her face. "And what about Copia? What about this bond between us? He's just as much if not more so unsafe if he's with me. Maybe he was right in going away, in staying away from me. If he got hurt again because of me I would never forgive myself. Maybe…"
"Maybe what, Sorellina?"
"Maybe I should be the one to go. I know how to care for myself. Leave here and protect everyone I care for." The words hang heavy in the air and she feels her heart give a painful thump at the thought and for a moment she wonders if this is how her father felt.
"You would abandon your sister? Her child?"
"They have Mountain. He and Lilit are planning on getting handfasted soon. He'll take care of them. The pack will take care of them."
Alesandro shakes his head, his jaw tensing and flexing as he sighs. "No, Annie. You and I both know it would hurt you more to try and leave."
"It would hurt, but if it would keep them safe I would do it in a heartbeat."
"But they wouldn't be. The Magistratus will still come for us. Have you forgotten the spy still has not been found?"
"But if-"
"No." He shifts and leans over, icy palm cupping her cheek and turning her to face him. "You will not go. You will not even entertain that idea. Am I clear? People here need you Annie, and despite what you think you are the safest within these walls."
"I'm just so scared…"
She bursts into tears then and he pulls her into his chest, arms tight around her as he lets her cry. He whispers soft comforts into her hair as she clutches to him, her sobs hard and shaking her whole body. Eventually she calms, sniffling and trembling but the sobs stop and her hold on him loosens yet still he holds her refusing to let go until she shivers from the almost overwhelming cold radiating from him.
"Alessandro?"
"Si, Annie?"
She hesitates, brow furrowing as she chews on her lip. He shifts slightly, using his thumb to gently dislodge it from her teeth and she looks up at him meeting his warm smile as he waits for her to speak.
"Copia…'
"What about him?"
"Are we really…?"
"Soulmates?" Alessandro asks, seeing the hidden question burning in her eyes. "Si. You and mio fratellino are destined to be together by forces far out of anyone's control. He will do right by you, Annie. Even if you were not soulmates, he would care for you with all that he has, with all that he is for as long as he lives."
"That's what the pull in us is, then? What longs, no, demands for us to be together?"
He nods slowly with a sigh. "Each mated pair feels their bond differently. Some stronger than others. The one you share with him is the strongest I have ever seen."
"It's changed, though. Since Midsummer. Even without everything else going on, how it feels now… it makes me uncomfortable. It's too demanding and I'm just not ready."
Alessandro looks down at her as he gently brushes her hair away from her face. "It is a supernatural force that, like me on this side of the veil, knows things and pushes you towards what it thinks is needed and it feels that you and he should consummate and fulfill it. To do so would make it stronger, and by that, the two of you would be stronger, especially with your emerging powers. Surely though you've noticed that it is not always that of a sexual nature. You both have felt each other's pain through it. Your longing. Loneliness. Anger."
Annie nods as she thinks about it, and while she's been told of things happening to her because of it, things that Copia went through because of it, it did make sense. A way to know how the other is, when they're in danger or trouble. She knows it's saved her life more than once by alerting Copia to something being wrong.
And even if it wasn't there, she knew that she still would have been drawn to the adorable man. Would have loved him regardless. Goddess, she wanted to be with him. Be his in all ways. Her heart yearned for it, pull or no pull, but her mind…
"I can't get past my trauma," she confesses softly. "We've grown closer, we've been intimate several times but each time I think I'm ready, I - I just… can't. I can't get past the rush of pain and fear and panic that threatens to drag me under." She inhales deeply, the pull of air shaky and halted as she blinks away tears. "I love him, Alessandro, but I don't see myself ever capable of being with him like that."
"You will, Annie. You will because you love him. Because he loves you." He gently cups her face again, thumb brushing against her cheek to wipe away tears she didn't realize were once more sliding from her eyes. "I know this because the love you two share is something I sought in my life with all the wrong people. It was only in what was my final year that I realized I'd had it already in the most unlikely of places.
"Life is unexpected, Annie. And it can be short. Take this advice from a dead man who was blind in his life." He takes her face gently between his hands as he looks her in the eye, a warm smile on his face even as his eyes reflect sadness. "Live every day to the fullest. Take the risks well worth taking. And love like there is no tomorrow, no matter how that may be."
Annie looks up at him as his words sink into her. He wasn't the first one to tell her to be brave and go for what she wants. She doesn't know why, but… him saying it made her believe it. Perhaps she really was overthinking everything. But, even with this, the fact remained that Copia was away and he wasn't going to be back any time soon, not for over a week at least. Possibly a month at most. The pang of loneliness hits her hard then.
"Are you okay, Sorellina?"
"No," she answers truthfully. "But I will be. Eventually."
"Alessandro?"
"Si?"
"Where was it you found that love?"
His smile softens as he looks across the clearing to where Lilit stood with Omega with a fond smile, the two seemingly lost in their own conversation as the little witch tosses her head back in laughter, the ghouls shoulders hunching with his own. "It was always right in front of me but I was too blind to see."
"Omega?!"
Alessandro laughs softly and nods, and if a ghost could blush he certainly was. "Si. My faithful friend and companion for so many years. We aren't bonded by fate like you and my fratellino, or like your sister and her ghoul, but we have our own connection."
"That's why he stayed after you died."
"That's why he stayed. The ones who killed my brothers and I, they were not truly ghouls but the Clergy did not know that. All they found was a ghoul mask and they assumed, hence why Omega's pack was banished back to the pits. It was thought they did it, as a way to rebel against their summonings and bindings but the Clergy were wrong. Bonded ghouls cannot harm their masters. Cannot harm anyone without command and even if one was given they could not kill a Papa, current or retired. Only my father could have commanded such a thing, but he would never. He was a terrible and absent father to us, but he was our father nonetheless and with us being the last of his line he had to hold faith that we would continue it. No, those who killed us were human and innocent ghouls suffered for it."
"And you don't know who it was?"
He shakes his head with a sad sigh. "No. I know many things, but that still eludes me. Eludes us."
"I'm sorry you died, Alessandro."
"Me too." He sighs and runs his fingers through his hair again, pushing it away from his face. "Me too."
Distantly, Annie can hear the bell chime from the Ministry, tolling out four times before falling silent.
"Is it truly so late already?" Alessandro asks as he sits up, gazing up at the opening in the cavern ceiling.
"It seems so. I…" Annie sighs softly and looks at him. "I don't want to go. I've enjoyed your company, Alessandro. It's made me feel like I'm not so alone."
"Oh, dolce Sorellina." He reaches out and rests his hand on hers. "I am always around, and I am always there for you. Both me and Omega."
"It's not the same, though."
"I know. Soon, hopefully, we won't have to rely on full moons and thin veils to speak to one another. Who knows. You may even be able to meet mio fratello some day."
"I'd like that."
"For now, you must return. I will have Omega escort you two back safely." He rises to his feet before helping Annie to hers, bracing her arm as she sways a moment. Once steady and book in hand they make their way over to the other two, Lilit looking over with a warm smile. Omega's amethyst eyes shine behind his mask and he nods his head when they approach.
"I'll be sure they get back to their rooms safely."
"Ah, you know me so well to know what I would ask of you," Alessandro says with a smile. "Grazie."
Omega nods his head again before stepping back as Lilit walks over.
"You take care now, Papa. Don't be such a stranger either. While I enjoy their company, Matty and Gio can be quite dull."
Alessandro laughs loudly at this as he shakes his head, smile wide and lighting up his face. "Si, I know how they can be. You forget they are my brothers and I grew up with them."
"Poor you."
Alessandro laughs loudly while nodding his head, his smile even wider as he reaches out to envelope her in a gentle hug with a kiss to the top of her head. "Be well piccola madre. You still need plenty of rest for the little one."
"We'll be fine. Mounty and Annie take good care of us. You'll be at the hand fasting, right?"
He smiles and nods, stepping back. "Si, we shall be there. How could we possibly miss such a joyous day?"
"Just making sure. I'll be sure to save you three seats."
"Grazie, Lilit. I will see you there, if not sooner. For now, take care and be well."
He looks at Omega who steps over and offers his arm which Lilit takes before he leads her back down the path. Annie moves to follow them when Alessandro grabs her arm.
"Annie, remember. Do not let fear control you. Trust in the bond, in the love you have for mio fratellino. All will be well."
"I'll try. Take care, Alessandro."
He leans over and places a cold kiss to her forehead before letting her go, watching as she follows after her sister and his ghoul as they head back to the Ministry. Annie had some answers now, and he hoped that, for the time, it would be enough. Shadows were stirring like coiled vipers ready to strike. He knew things now, things that have been and those yet to come, but there was still so much he could not see. That he did not know. And it worried him. All he had was his faith that things, at least for Copia and Annie, would work out.
____________________________________
~Wednesday Morning: Estonia Abbey~
Copia's internal clock, which had never led him wrong before, refused to wake him yet again and again he was left rushing to ready himself for a busy day without any time to pause for a much needed coffee. He and his ghouls had arrived late last night after their Ritual, and while they had off for the day he would be very busy attending to duties here. It was days like this, where there was no time to rest between Rituals, that he regretted his choice to stay on the road. On top of that, the longing for his woman grew by the day and he hadn't even been gone that long.
Last night he had been plagued by nightmares once more, woke drenched in sweat and panic and nearly sliced his face with his claws, which had reappeared in his sleep, the dark gradation of discoloration of his skin reaching his shoulders this time. It had taken him several tries to clear his mind and return them to normal like Aether had taught him. Thankfully, though, whatever it was seemed to only affect his arms. Still, it worried him and when he had a free chance he sought out the one ghoul he could confide in about it.
"Aether!" Copia calls down the hall, seeing his tall broad ghoul exiting the refectory after lunch. "Amico, a word, per favore."
The ghoul stopped and looked at him confused, a slight tilt to his head before he nodded, waving his pack mates on as he joggs over to the man. "What's up, Boss?"
"I must speak with you. Come," Copia replies in Italian as he turns and walks down the hall towards the gardens. Aether follows, confused and concerned as he watches Copia walk, taking in how he seems nervous and jumpy, arms almost stiff at his sides with his hands in loose fists. It's not until they find a secluded corner far from any prying ears that he even remotely relaxes.
"Copia, what's going on?" Aether asks in a hushed tone.
"It happened again." Copia crosses his arms tightly over his chest, his shoulders hunched forward as he looks around wearily. "The… change. To my arms."
"Do you know what could have triggered it?"
"I had a nightmare."
Aether nods slowly, easing his own stance slightly as he thinks. "That could trigger it. What was your nightmare about?"
"That is the thing. I do not remember. I finally went to sleep late last night and woke up mere hours later in a cold sweat overwhelmed with panic and my arms had changed." Copia sighs lightly, pursing his lips slightly as he turns away to look down a row of blood red roses. "I've been having nightmares nearly every night we've been away. Here I was worried about Annie having them yet I am the one plagued."
"I can tell that you've been off. And, if I'm honest, it's been getting worse, Copia."
"You think I do not know that?" He sighs softly, raising a gloved hand to cover his forehead, thumb and middle finger rubbing at his temples. "Still, it is better that I am away from Annie. I won't put her at risk because I don't trust myself."
"Is it?" Aether lifts his own free hand to rub the back of his neck with a sigh. "I'm.. I'm not so sure, Copia. I'm actually getting quite worried."
"What is there to worry about?"
"Your health, first of all. Mental and physical. You really haven't been well, Caro. Now, don't get me wrong, to anyone else you may seem okay but I know you well enough to know that you're not yourself. Your performance on stage seems strained. You've been a bit pitchy and missing lyrics here and there. At the Abbeys you're constantly on edge and have been rather short with others. Even the last ghoul summoning wasn't as smooth as the others have been and that never happens. Not with your perfectionism."
"What would you have me do?" Copia spits out with a heavy sigh. "I am doing my best, Aether. Doing my duties to my people and wobbling the asses of thousands of fans and would be initiates night after night."
"Go home. All of us. Go home and you take a proper rest. After what happened on Midsummer Eve…"
Copia shakes his head, turning and walking down a worn path towards a stone bench that he perches on, his leg bouncing as his hands clasp together and rest on his lap. "There is too much to do. Too many of my people to see. I am to be Papa someday and I need to show the congregations they can count on and follow me. Trust me to lead them."
"What about the wedding?"
"What wedding?"
"Mountain and Lilit's. She'll be showing much more before we can blink, enough so that her clothes won't be able to hide it and they want to get married before that. Before they tell the rest of the Ministry about the baby."
"I… did not know they were planning for it to be so soon."
Aether sighs lightly and eases himself down next to Copia, reaching over to rest his hand on his still bouncing leg to stop the movement. "Because you've been so focused on everything else, so in your head that you haven't been present when he talks about it before the Rituals. "
"When are they planning it for?"
"The 24th. In the middle of the break between Russia and Canada."
"That… that is only a week away!"
"Exactly." Aether sighs softly, looking over at Copia with his eyes showing his concern. "Please, Copia. Reconsider this path you're insisting on being on. You've been so absent already. Would you really choose to remain absent and miss things such as this?
"I know you're scared of hurting Annie. But you're hurting her regardless. Hurting yourself and those around you that love and care for you. If you're this bad after only a couple weeks… I fear to imagine how much worse it will get."
"I must. At least until the break. But when we go home, what will I do, Aether?"
"You go to your woman and you talk to her. Explain to her what's been going on and what you've been feeling."
Copia lets out a tense huff of a laugh with a roll of his eyes. "Si, I could see just how that would go. 'Annie, I'm back for a little bit but I won't be staying because I'm overcome with fear that I may force you into a situation you do not wish because something in me demands it to the point I've nearly forced myself on you just to fulfill it. A situation I promised would never happen with me.'"
Aether sighs softly and fights the urge to rake his hand down his face since his mask would be in the way. "Vincenzo… I'm serious. You need to talk to her! You can't keep hiding this from her, or your transformations. What happens if you have another nightmare and, Satan forbid, you accidentally scratch her or she wakes up and sees it?"
"You are not helping!"
"I'm trying to. But it's hard to help someone when they're consumed by fear. I could go on and on until I'm blue in the face but it won't matter until you're the one willing to listen!"
Copia looks at him for a long moment before turning away with a sigh. Deep down he knew Aether was right, knew his fear was preventing him from so much but what could he do? He was truly at a loss.
They sit in silence, Copia withdrawing into his thoughts and his faithful ghoul watching on with concern. It's quiet in the gardens, the siblings tending to classes or chores and the ghouls assigned to the gardens kept a wide berth from the Cardinal.
The silence is suddenly broken by Aether's phone pinging its notification tone and he shifts after a glance at Copia, pulling it from his pocket to check the text as another notification sounds. His brow furrows behind his mask and he clears his throat.
"Ah, Copia?"
"Hmm?"
"It's for you."
"Che Cosa? What do you mean?"
"Here." Aether hands him his phone, the Cardinal frowning as he takes it.
Mountain: Aeth, can you hand your phone to Copia? Lilit said he was with you right now.
Mountain: Copia, it's Annie. I talked with Alessandro last night. I need to see you. Need to talk to you. Please, come home.
"Copia..? What does she mean she talked to Papa?"
The man blinks and looks at his ghoul, his face pale and eyes wide with a building panic. It takes him a moment to calm his now rapidly beating heart enough to answer.
"She… she and Lilit can see and speak to the dead. Alessandro, he is still around and he has spoken to them both. He was to give Annie insight about her father and her locked away powers." Copia finally looks up at Aether, seeing the array of shock and confusion followed by acceptance flash in his blue eyes. "No one else knows. Not for certain, really."
"What do you think he told her?"
"I have no idea. But, it appears that we have a change in our plans." Copia types out a response before handing the phone back to Aether as he stands up. "Come. There is much to do today."
Copia walks down the path they came, his demeanor still tense yet somehow relaxed. Aether watches him turn the corner before glancing at his phone.
Me: We will be home after the Ritual tomorrow. Te amo, amore.