A/N: whatever you think is gonna happen at the end of the chapter doesnt happen
i mean, to say you guys have.... asked for this chapter a lot, would be. an understatement. i mean some of yall went feral and i enjoyed watching every second of it. but guys. guys i finally got a chance to sit and write. and it's only cos i got sick. so this is written under a lot of writers block and panadol so strap in TIGHT
-
"Marinette, what note?"
Panic clawed through her. "Don't lie."
"I'm not lying."
No.
No.
"You never got the note?"
"No! I never got any note from you besides the ones in class we've passed."
The air around them stilled. Marinette's hands covered her mouth, the tide of grief in her eyes rising.
"Are you being serious?"
"Yes! Since when did you want to be friends!? You never gave me anything!"
Oh no oh no oh no oh no.
"You... actually thought your dad gave you that scarf?"
You could hear a pin drop.
Adrien went white.
His frame stiffened, eyes wide and as still as the billboard print of him in the distance. She could visibly see something dreadful come alive and reveal itself to him.
"The one... for my birthday? The blue one?" His face went brittle. "That you... stomped on?"
"That I gave you!"
"That—"
Oh. No.
After a fretted silence, Adrien's voice emerged at a new, wavering octave. "...You gave me that scarf?"
Marinette felt like someone was playing a sick joke on her. She held her arms close to her chest in self-consciousness and stared at the ground. "I... I made you that scarf."
"What?!"
She stared.
"Marinette, are you serious? You made me that scarf?!"
She nodded, weakly.
Adrien's exasperation featherly lifted. He now, too, had realised something that neither of them could put into the words.
She clustered further into herself. "I wrote you a letter with the present. I wanted to start afresh in case the umbrella really was an accident. Your dad's assistant told me to put it in the mail chute, and then—"
The scene flashed. She'd stormed, yelled, and ripped the hand-sewn scarf out of his hands and threw it to the mucky ground, symbolising the retraction of the peace offering he'd rejected.
"'He' didn't have a letter with it?"
"Letters don't mean anything!" he'd said, and she grated him about the worthlessness of the rest of the gift – speaking in metaphors, but Adrien would've thought...– oh boy. The things he would've thought...
"You made me that scarf?" he cried again, like it would help him believe it, or like she would admit that this was joke. Adrien surged forward. "You – And I said... But Nathalie— But!" He gripped his hair like he could pull it out. "Ah, they lied to me. I was told that it was— Man. She must have gotten rid of your letter and told me it was from my father, and I was... I was the hopeful kid that believed it..." The silence put on a few pounds and a new, trepid light entered Adrien's sovereign eyes. "My Father didn't..."
His father didn't give him a present.
He gave him another reason to hate her.
Marinette wanted to break out in sobs.
"Ahh! I'm such an idiot! I should've known that wasn't like him." Adrien drove the heels of his hands into his eyes. "And you were so mad... and I thought... Ahh! This is... this is just..."
Realisations were circling them. Too many; spinning and sending them spiralling. Marinette thought about Adrien's behaviour after that day and how, with her own animosity and unhinged meanness, it all made vile, awful sense – how that anchored them deeper into a caustic vat of rivalry and piling contention for months; how that coloured any other jab, snark, and disagreement from that point.
And yet all she could say was, "I'm sorry your father didn't get you a present."
On a surface level, his eyes were sad but behind them was something terribly frantic.
"That's nothing compared to what's happening right now. He can disappoint me my whole life but one thing is I don't want to disappoint you anymore, Marinette. This rivalry is stupid. How many times have we fought for reasons that weren't real? That we just didn't talk about? I mean, are you still mad about the gum because—" he pinched his nose, heaving a sigh like he was on the verge on an aneurysm, "—I was only trying to get the gum off your seat. I swear. Chloe put it there and blamed it on me. I wanted to explain myself but there was that akuma, and since then I know we've said some questionable things to each other but please, Marinette. That wasn't on purpose. Please believe me so we can—"
She leapt.
Never before had she been so shameless in hugging someone, latching herself, instantly, to him like he was a long-time friend she hadn't seen in years. An inexplicable, interchangeable whelming coursed through the body that had dissolved her into a sniffing girl buried in his chest. Her arms tightly wound him like he was something most precious to her.
"I believe you..." she whispered. "I'm so sorry ... I'm so sorry..."
She hugged him tight, because she'd finally let go of something horrible.
Overcome by the billions of feelings exploding within, Adrien hugged Marinette, cradling her sobbing head. She mumbled an incoherent chorus about how sorry she was about not believing him and tearing the scarf and creating a mess for them to live through. Inside, he wept bitterly, but his mouth uttered nothing. His glazed-over eyes sought console from the glimmering sky with questions about how. How did they do this to themselves? How could they be so stubborn?
Had he gotten the note, where would they be now?
But their towering thoughts were soon knocked over.
A crash.
A scream.
An akuma.
An akuma! Now! Out of all nights!
The distant cries weren't their internal monologues, or hearts, or resolves. It came from the dark hole of their unwanted responsibility that crept up on them like a plague. Marinette's skin went cold realising that an akuma had broken loose close by and Ladybug – stupid Ladybug! – was due to show up, just as things were finally being cleared with Adrien.
Like the same fear had struck him down, Adrien wrenched her into him. "Akuma. We're getting to safety."
Her badass Ladybug mode sucker-punched emotional-Marinette out of the way, and quickly she was jumping out of Adrien's grip and thinking of ways to split up.
But still being fazed meant she didn't think fast enough, so now she'd just pushed Adrien away and was staring at him, frozen, cold lines on her cheek from the wind hitting the tears' paths. And just like that she'd already hurt him again.
"I—"
She what? Needed to go transform into a superhero to fight beside the man she was supposed to be in love with?
"Marinette, I understand you may be conflicted about how you feel about me right now and—"
"No that's not—"
"—and want some time away from me but I need to get you to safety." Adrien's eyes were brimming against his serious expression. "Please."
She nodded, swallowing something tight. "The beach cubicles." Taking his hand, she pulled him the direction of the single booths. Under the building or any hidden crevice would've made more safety sense for any other two people, but one of these people was a begrudged superhero who wanted nothing more than to go home, eat too many pastries, and draft out every interaction with Adrien from his perspective then feel horrible about herself. But instead, she had to fight an innocent pawn of Hawk Moth's while Adrien waited in a toilet for her.
Even worse (better), he complied wordlessly to being split because now he thought she needed space from him!
-
Thank goodness they'd split up so he could turn into some faux-leather clad clown with cat ears. Just what he needed tonight, amongst tactfully avoiding Lila, being caught-out by Luka, and realising he'd been an absolute douche this whole time to Marinette.
(Okay, he knew that – more so that a fat chunk of why suddenly didn't exist.)
Also, his dad, really did just turn out to be 'Gabriel Agreste'. And nothing more.
"He couldn't even design you a scarf?" Plagg was muttering as Adrien fashionably smacked his head against the cubicle wall. "I would've at least ripped some cloth off those sheets at the warehouse and stuck a cheap card on it."
His face was a turmoil of red, strain, and dried tears as he sliced a look to his kwami. "Plagg..."
"What? I'm trying to talk you through it."
Adrien held his fists to his forehead. The screams outside worsened as if his brain had escaped and was crawling around the city.
"Your dad sucks," Plagg corrected. "Is what I'm trying to say."
"Thank you, Plagg." He exhaled, slinking to the floor and covering his head – Just for a moment, he promised Ladybug to himself.
"So it's not your fault."
Adrien cracked open his gaze feeling Plagg's magical paw on his shoulder.
"It's not your fault, you know?"
His jaw hardened.
"Adrien. None of this is your fault."
"It is a little bit."
"You didn't know. And if you never tried to talk it out with Marinette, neither of you would've found out."
Adrien swallowed.
"You didn't know, Adrien," Plagg affirmed harsher. "If you had, you would've fallen in love with her a lot sooner."
"I'm not—!"
Plagg's unimpressed expression was there as his head shot up.
Adrien turned away, gripping his knees and silently wondering what excuse he still had not to be irrevocably in love with Marinette.
More cries rippled along the riverbank and filled Adrien's clenched fists with sweat.
"Ladybug!" a citizen cried, alarming his sulky-pants to his responsibility.
Plagg nudged him. "Ladybug needs you."
As Adrien transformed, he cynically wondered just how untrue that was.
-
As Chat Noir, one of the best and worst parts about his job was figuring out what led to an akuma's tantrum and what the heck their given power was. It was more fun below baby blue skies, missing history class, and especially not right after an emotional revelation that made reality seem pale and far away.
So for now, he couldn't care who, what, or why this akuma was what it was. His main priority was getting back in time for Marinette not to think he'd ditched her and consequently, ruin all the fresh grounds they'd made – if they made any. What if she still needed time to hate him? What if she found him gone during the attack and assumed their conversation just became all too much for him?
Not that he could think about that now. Not when half of Paris was being... digested?
"Why is it eating everything?!"
"Less questions, Chat! More helping!"
"I am helping!"
Ladybug's yoyo flew by him as she whipped through the street, marking each corner to wrap the magic string around the– the...
"Why does it look like that!?"
"It's an akuma, do you think it's supposed to look conventional?"
"Well It doesn't look ventional either!"
Ladybug facepalmed as a freakishly large tongue lurched at him, and his jaw dropped in horror. There was no way this was an akuma. Out of every miraculous-hungry villain, why did it have a mouth that big? Why did it have to actually want to eat him? Why? Why tonight? Why was he alive? What was this life for?
"Chat Noir!"
He was so, so out of it.
For as much as he was dazed and disgusted, Ladybug was reckless and frustrated. Their banter lacked a light-hearted touch and her face sat like stone. Her moves were jagged, fast, and followed by groans, like she couldn't wait to leave – like she couldn't stand working beside him tonight. She had an attitude and Chat Noir didn't need that right now. He didn't want Ladybug chastising him and spewing orders because he kept zoning out.
What he wanted, was Marinette.
Compared to the rest of the night, Master Fu steering a bike towards 'Feast' in a Hawaiian shirt retelling all sorts of lore (that somehow Ladybug already knew) didn't even surprise him. He didn't care for it. Whatever miraculous plot progression this was, he was out. He didn't need to know. He'd let it play in the far background. He may have been strapped in a magical suit, shorter hair caught by the wind, and shooting ice cream at the sentimonster (he knew this one wasn't an akuma) on the pedalling back of André's cart, but tonight he was still Adrien. He didn't feel like Chat Noir.
"I am not in the mood today, Feast thing! Go find a lollie-ring instead!"
When ice cream ran out, the trio led the creature to the Eiffel Tower, where Chat could cover for Ladybug as the others discussed something probably helpful. She and Fu hid behind a slanted bus with his ridiculous model face postered on it. He noticed the angle made it appear the grinning idiot was eating the dirt and felt the display was pretty apt for the situation.
Meanwhile, he was dodging a 10-foot tongue that was increasingly long, increasingly persistent and— Yeah, there went his staff.
Of course that was when Ladybug tuned back in.
"Chat!"
"He just swallowed it whole! That wasn't my fault!"
She leapt toward him, and if she wasn't also dodging a 10-foot tongue, she would've stomped crankily. "What is with you tonight?"
"Me? Me? You're barely thinking before you act! You're missing half the time!"
"At least I'm aware I'm in a battle and not in la-la land!"
Heat surged up his neck. He stood slack-jawed with indignant brows like an outraged child. "La-la land?"
"Look out!"
He was eaten.
He was eaten, it was a whole thing. No big deal – Ladybug joined him willingly. Some internal battle with her lucky-charm metal detector and yada-yada happened. As they swam inside (inside! its! body!), they searched for the amok in control of its sentience until destroying the master staff and exploding Feast into bubbles.
Fighting a new Hawk Moth play tonight? Just what he needed! Just. What. He needed.
"That took too long," Ladybug sighed with her head low. Their jewellery had already taken half its warning beeps.
Oh, and ladybug's attitude. Also just what he needed.
"L-B, please." He pinched his brow.
"You were out of it, Chat. We're superheroes. We have a responsibility. We have to keep each other accountable."
She was pacing, fingers carding through unkempt bangs while her ponytail, long and streaked red, swung with each stride.
As if this visual of her wasn't enough, he pointed out, "You're out of it too."
"At least I didn't zone out and get eaten!"
"What do you mean?! It was part of your plan."
"But you didn't know that!"
"You know why? Because you never let me in on your plans! You just expect me to trust you every time! That's why I wasn't worried when Feast got me."
Ladybug smacked her hands to her face. "That doesn't mean you can just get captured by the enemy all the time, Chat! It's careless. You keep getting caught by akuma."
"They're sacrifices to help the battle!"
"They're not always!"
He stepped back, hurt. Hurt and tired and not in the mood. Their miraculouses beeped.
His boots scraped against the gravel and a lamppost hit his back as he watched Ladybug mutter through bitter breaths. He could attach her demeanour to five synonyms of stressed as she paced before the Eiffel Tower, the soft lights belying the inner torment rippling through her.
"Chat. Look. I'm just struggling right now with the idea of letting you go. And... and so many other things..."
"Ladybug." He took some strides to approach her, then held her shoulders like that first battle; that first time he looked at her like something more than a friend. They were in the same spot under the Eiffel Tower, him beholding the same, brittle girl unsure of herself. But the sky was dark now, and her hard-cut face had seen more of the broken world. "I'm still here, aren't I? I'm not going anywhere."
"But you will!"
"I won't!"
She fought with her emotions. "You don't know what I'm saying..."
His claws pressed into her spotted fabric while he sighed. "Ladybug, you always bring me back. You always do, okay? We're a team. We're superheroes. Superheroes."
"Ugh! Exactly! We're just superheroes!"
He didn't know how to calm her. "Ladybug—"
"I keep watching you sacrifice yourself, Chat! And it's a constant reminder that our partnership won't last forever! That one day you won't be by my side!"
"I'll always be by your side, M'l– Ladybug."
She looked like she'd been stung. Her gloves fell over her scrunched-up face. "Dang it Chat, that's not what I'm talking about!"
He stared, befuddled.
"I'm just– I have to remember I'll lose you one day. That we'll go our separate ways when this is all done. I'll never know you. And I've already got a lot on my plate right now, so maybe I'm spewing nonsense—"
"Ladybug."
"—or maybe it's not about that. Maybe it's because I know I'm just a partner to you, maybe even a good friend, but I'm still just–" She clenched her teeth and screwed her eyes shut. "I'm still just accepting that it's all we'll be, okay?"
She moved back, marching away and holding her head as if to herd the explosive thoughts back inside.
"Ladybug." He surged forward. "Ladybug! Ladybug—!" She wouldn't turn around. He was far too emotionally exhausted to process whatever this was; her words sat in his brain like a foreign object, taking him so aback that he couldn't for a second process the pulsing predictability of her meaning. He needed an elaboration. He needed more words, more expressions, more sanity on his own behalf to deal with this. "Slow down! Please. What are you saying?"
"I don't know!"
He chased her. "What did you mean by that?"
"Ugh, nothing! It's nothing!"
"What did you mean you're accepting that we're only good friends?"
What did she mean.
What did she mean.
"I just...!"
"Ladybug!" His voice had been raised, but that time the still area echoed with a genuine cry, the laces of panic straining it in a noise that finally made her turn. "Please! What do you mean you're just a partner to me?!"
Her earrings beeped imperatively. She shook her head, backed up, and then readied her yoyo.
"I'm sorry, Chat. I wasn't supposed to bring this up again. I'm... I'm just sorry."
Then just like that, she zipped off into the black abyss.
"LADYBUG!"
His ring beeped one last time.
And Adrien's knees hit the ground a second before his tears.
-
A/N: oh you wanted fluff? oh you wanted reconciliation? I didn't get that vibe. I DO remember people wanting more Ladybug and Chat tho :D
As always leave your theories and recommendations on what will happen next and do not die while i leave you guys hanging (again). LOTS OF LOVE FOR ALL OF YOU - Em