Anura's POV
"Remember your birthday three years ago.."
*Flashback*
It was February 20th Dave's birthday, I was in our bedroom getting ready, I couldn't contain myself I was to excited to spend time with him on his birthday, I was so giddy that I struggled to put on my earrings, this year I went all out for him, At first I planned on giving him a surprise party at the house and invite his friend but I wanted him to have even more fun and let loose so I rented a VIP section in the infamous club diamond just for him and invited almost everyone he was cool with, I wanted tonight to be special for him, he was turning big 23 after all.
After I was done I slipped on my heels and stared at my outfit in the mirror, I wore a black midi see through dress with tiny diamond encrusted on them, I searched high and low for the perfect dress tonight, I wanted his eyes only on me, I smiled at the mirror hoping that he'd love the dress as much as I did, I grabbed my tote purse and belongings then left out our bedroom and went down the stairs where he was waiting for me, I smiled brightly once he noticed me going down the stairs but my smile quickly subsided when I saw the look he had on his face.
"What the fuck are you wearing?" He asked looking at me with a disgusted look, I frowned at him.
"Y- You don't like it?" I asked sadly, he shook his head.
"Hell naw, are you out of your mind? You really thought I was going to let you walk out this house looking like some hoe off the streets?" My frowned deepened his words were pretty harsh, I looked down at my feet, I didn't want to disappoint him so I quickly turned around and told him I would change my clothes, I went back upstairs and entered my closet looking for something different to wear, I was hoping that he'd like this dress I bought it for him after all, but I wasn't going to question him, I looked at myself in the mirror once again before changing my outfit, he was right I did look a little slutty in this dress.
I found another dress and slid it on, it was pink and match my skin perfectly, I knew pink was Dave's favorite color, so I hoped he likes this dress, I left out the room and went down stairs again, going down these steps in heels were killing my feet, I entered the living where Dave was seated I cleared my throat to get his attention.
"Do you like it?" I asked twirling around for him, I stopped once I realized he was mean mugging me again, I let out another sigh.
"Are you trying to embarrass me?" He asked standing up swiftly, I felt my heart jump slightly at his sudden movement, I started to fiddle with my fingers, I shook my head at his question.
"No Dave-"
"Nah! I think you are, bruh do you not see what you're wearing? it's like you don't even have any self-respect, It's worse than the first one, what are you trying to do at this party? Get other niggas attention?!" By now his voice was at a high octave, I shook my head at him.
"No baby I- I just.."
"You just what?!" He yelled causing me to jump, I frowned and looked down at my feet and twisted my fingers.
"I just wanted to look sexy for you." I said in a whispered tone.
"Speak up!" He yelled.
"I said I just wanted to look sexy for you." I said a little bit louder.
He sucked his teeth at me almost obnoxiously." Look-." He grabbed my chin to make me look up at him." There's going to be a lot of niggas over there, thirsty pervertive ones, and I'm not about to spend my birthday trying to fight them off all because you chose to not wear something decent enough to cover all of your shame, stay home." He let go of my face and backed up.
"No! I'm sorry I'll go change again." I said letting go of my fingers, I walked over to him and grabbed his hand." I'm sorry!" I apologize, I didn't want to stay home alone tonight, I've been cooped up in this house for to long, I wanted to spend time with him and have fun on his birthday, I didn't want to miss out on tonight.
Dave yanked his hand out of mine." You got one last chance to change into something decent, hurry up or I'm leaving you." He said, I nodded and practically ran back upstairs, all I wanted was to match his fly and look good along with him, I didn't want to look basic so I grabbed the nearest jumpsuit and placed it on, it was a blue velvet jumpsuit with gold around its neck and breasts area. I was very much aware about the men who'll be out in the club but I wasn't purposely dressing the way I was to get their attention, I was doing it for him because I noticed that's what he liked, I saw the way he looked at other women, half the time they were showing off their perfect bodies in revealing clothing, so I thought hey why not do the same, I just wanted him to look at me the way he looked at other prettier girls.
I changed my heels to gold ones and went back down stairs once again, when I reached the final steps I heard Dave began to laugh, at first I thought he was laughing at something else but he was actually laughing at me, I looked at him sadly." You don't like it?" I asked already knowing the answer to that question.
"What do you think? Your hips getting a little to fat it's not cute." I looked at my hips and touched them frowning, he's right they did look a little to big, although I have been starving myself lately when I do get the chance to finally eat I pig out and all that weight seems to go to my hips.
"I know I'm sorry, I'll start working out more, but do you like my outfit?"
He shook his head at me."No you ain't got no sense of style, your ass cheeks stay ready to fall out your damn clothes they've gotten so saggy, you need to start hitting the gym." His words felt like knives to my heart, was I really getting overweight? I bit my lips trying hard to hold in my tears, I can't deny it he was right, I have gotten fat in the worst places, I've gotten chunky, and it's like no matter what I do I still can't seem to lose the weight" Come on grab your shit we're already late because of you."
"Sorry." I said softly walking behind him, before we made it to the car he stopped me half way and grabbed my arm gripping it tightly." When we get to the party you're not allowed to mingle with no body, I better not see you approaching nobody, if I catch you laughing and smiling in another niggas face that'll be your ass, if someone says hi to you and ask how you've been you respond politely and stay quiet after that, I better not catch your ass dancing or drinking just sit there and be quiet." He said through clenched teeth, I gulped and shakily nodded my head at him, he let my arm go and opened his side of the door and got in, I sighed and opened mine closing it once I was in, I've learned that when he would get like this it's best not to argue back with him.
It wasn't fair that I can't even have fun at the party I made for him but I need to think on the brighter side, we barely go out together and this is my chance to be around him even if it means not doing anything and just sitting there, although I wanted to have fun and let loose but I don't want to get him angry with me, besides the nights not over yet, I have a surprise for him waiting at home.
We drove silently to the party like we always do in every car ride, to break the silence I decided to compliment him." You look very Handsome babe." I said truthfully, he did look really good, I'm kind of worried at all the attention he'll be getting at the club by women, he stayed quiet so I continued you talking.
"Are you excited about being 23?" I asked.
"Not really." He said blandly, I smiled finally he's talking to me.
"Well tonight your mind will change, I went all out for your birthday and the cake I got you! Oh my gosh the cake you're going to love it, and after tonight you'll be getting a big surprise-"
"Oh my god shut the fuck up!" He said in an annoyed tone, I frowned at him. "I was just trying to make conversation-"
"Well don't, I didn't ask you to speak."
"Are you mad-"
"Yes I'm mad now shut the fuck up and enjoy the ride, stay talking bro, you can never shut up for once." He gripped the steering wheel and stared forward aggravatingly, I felt that same ache in my heart come back again, I bit my lip and stayed quiet the remainder of the ride, Dave absolutely hated conversing with me, I could barely get a few words out of him when we're alone, the remainder of the time spent near him we barely talked. At the house we were never near each other, mainly because Dave always separated himself away from me, I looked over at him in the corner of my eye and just seeing the look in his face made me know I was already ruining his birthday with my presence, I felt a tear streak down my cheek and I immediately wiped it without him noticing, I didn't understand why he was being so mean to me even after all I did to make his birthday so special for him.
We finally made it to the big building that had flashing lights coming out of it, he parked his car and we both got out the car, I knew not to wait for him to open my door side for me, I learned that the hard way, I followed behind him as he made his way towards the door, as I walked I heard other men doing cat calls at me, I rolled my eyes.
"Hey little mama." I heard one said.
"Damn she fine as fuck." I wrapped my arms around myself feeling uncomfortable at all the staring I was getting, Dave must've noticed because he grabbed me by my waist and we walked side by side, at first I thought he did it because he felt bad but really he did to assert his dominance like men always do, he gripped my waist tightly with his hands, I knew when he did that it meant I wasn't going to hear the end of it when we go home.
We entered the club while everyone outside waited to get in line, we didn't have to wait because the bouncer knew me, the loud blaring nose got louder as soon as we walked in, Dave let me go and I lead him to where his birthday party was being held at, it was on the top floor a private secluded area for special occasions."here it is." I said to him, I moved aside and let him do the honors of opening the door, once he did the sounds of many 'surprises' came from his friends who were at the party, I noticed him smiling brightly as he began dapping and hugging each one of them, I knew he'd love it, I don't know why he was acting like such a sour cat.
I greeted the ones who greeted me like Dave asked me too and took a seat a little further away from him, but close enough for him to see me, I smiled and watched him laugh and mingle with his friends, it was almost like seeing a child in a candy store, I rarely get to see this happy side of him.
"Hold on y'all—" he walked over to where I was seated, my heart jumped in my chest because I thought I was in trouble for doing something wrong but instead he took my hand in his and got me up from his seat and walked back over to the crowd of his friends, he lifted up his glass and stared at me" I wanna say a special thank you to Anura for going all out for me on my 23rd, you really know how to throw a party and make a guy feel special, thank you." He said causing me to smile brightly, I didn't expect him to thank me at all for tonight, after his mini speech everyone started chanting for us to kiss, by now I was already blushing hard and grinning, he looked at me and gave me this look which didn't set right with me, but he covered it up with a quick smile and leaned into kiss me, it was slow and lazy, almost as if he wasn't into it, he pulled away and smiled at the crowd and let go of me, and that's when I realized it was just a stunt for the crowd of his friends, to once again assert his dominance and let everyone know I was taken.
I sat down and stayed seated and let him and everyone else have fun, I was approached on multiple occasions being asked to danced but I'd quickly lie and say my foot hurt and I couldn't dance, I was hungry so I got up and went to the bar to get something to snack on, I got Dave all of his favorite foods and snacks, I noticed that he didn't grab anything to eat here so I grabbed him a plate and filled it with food, when I turned around I saw him laughing and smiling in another women's face, I definitely don't remember inviting her, I watched her place her hands on his arms and stared at him flirtatiously, I could feel my cheeks heating up, I let out a breath and tried to stay cool.
"Don't cause a scene, don't cause a scene" I said silently to myself, I forced a smile and walked over to them, when Dave noticed me he took one step back from the women which seemed very suspicious.
"Hey baby, I got your favorite." I said shoving the plate onto his hand, making him almost drop it, I gave him a sarcastic smile and faced the unknown women.
"And you are?" I asked.
"Would you excuse us?" Dave said to her, she smiled and nodded walking away from us, Dave turned me around and gave me his infamous death glare.
"What?" I asked innocently, he stared at me for a good minute then smiled.
"Can you tell the people in the kitchen downstairs to bring down the cake you were talking so excitedly about? I wanna try it." I smiled brightly and nodded at him, I got all excited about the cake and completely excused the fact that he was possibly flirting with that girl.
"Okay I'll be right back, you're going to love it!" He smiled at me and gave me a kiss on the forehead, I went downstairs to get the cake but little did I know that him telling me to go get It was an excuse to keep me out of his section, because when I went back upstairs after being told the cake hasn't arrived yet I was told by the security guard who was on the top floor that I couldn't get back into the party.
"Why can't I come in, I'm the one who started this party." I asked irritatingly.
"I'm sorry Ma'am I was getting strict orders not to let you back in."
"From who?!"
"The birthday boy I think." He said shrugging, I felt my heart drop, I placed my hand on my chest as I stared in disbelief, I couldn't believe he really ordered the security guard not to let me into his party, even after spending all that money on making it special for him, this is what I get in return, I quickly turned around and walked away, there was no point of trying to force myself in because I wasn't getting into that party period, I didn't know what to do after that, I didn't know how I would get home, I couldn't even call him since I don't have his phone number, not like he'd pick up my call even if I did call him.
I went back to the main floor, I could feel my feet aching in these heels, I pushed my way through the crowded dance floor and walked towards the bar and took a seat, the building may be packed but I felt completely alone, I turned my head to look up at the section Dave was in, it may be secluded from the rest but you can still see everyone in there, I couldn't spot him so I turned back around and ordered a soda, I was handed the drink and took a sip from the can. I begin feeling someone's eyes were on me, I looked around but nobody was staring at me, I took out my phone and began scrolling through it, I wasn't in much of a mood to have fun anymore.
All I wanted to do was crawl into bed and go to sleep, I sighed and took another sip from my drink, after a few minutes I felt the urge to pee, I got up and rushed to the bathroom, it took me awhile to get my way through the crowd, it was almost as if the building just kept getting even more crowded by the second, I finally made it to the bathroom, it was surprisingly empty, I felt relieved that I didn't have to wait in a line, I entered one of the stalls immediately regretting the jumpsuit I was wearing, I unzipped it and squatted down on the toilet, after I was down I flush and zipped my outfit back up.
I heard the bathroom door open but didn't think much by it until I walked out of my stall, there was a man standing in front of the bathroom door, I looked at his hand and noticed a switch blade was dangling from his fingers, I felt my heart rate move rapidly, my whole body completely froze up as we both stared at each other quietly, he gave me a sinister grin that caused a shiver to run down my spine." Y-you can't be here." I said finally having the courage to speak, his smile became wider and he continued staring at me, I thought about all the most unthinkable things he was going to do to me, in this conveniently empty bathroom space, I thought about how he was planning on violating me and possibly hurting me in the process if I fought back, I thought about the potential rape I was going to have to deal with for the rest of my life.
I moved slowly away from the stall keeping a close eye on him, I backed up towards the sinks praying to god someone would just walk in and help me, he followed making my heart rate accelerate even faster, I began to fear for my life, I could already feel tears dripping down my cheeks, I was completely terrified."Please you don't have to do this." I begged.
"I've been staring at you the moment you walked in here, you're so beautiful." He finally spoke, he continued walking towards me, I quickly took a step to the side and tried running towards the door, I felt him yank me back by my hair and hold me in a choke lock, he slammed me back against the hard floor and I let out a loud yelp, I started screaming out for somebody to help me but my cry for help couldn't be heard due to the loud blaring music coming outside of the bathroom.
I felt his fist come in contact with me cheek, I could taste the bitter iron sensation of blood as it dripped out of my mouth, he reached out for his knife and pointed it towards my neck."if you stay quiet I won't hurt you, just relax." He said in a tone that made me want to vomit, I felt sick to my stomach, all I could think of was Dave in that moment, all I could think of was a time where promised me he'd always be there to protect me, I desperately wished he'd barge in that room right now and save me.
The strange man who was about to rape me held a firm grip on my neck blocking my air way, he removed his knife from my neck and began tearing my outfit not carefully enough I could feel the sharp tip of his knife cut my skin as he tried forcing my clothes off, I tried pushing him off but he placed his whole body weight against me preventing my to move.
By now tears were dripping so rapidly from my face that I could barely see his face anymore."P-please no! I don't want this." I said as I watched him grip my bare breast, I closed my eyes tightly and looked away from his disgusting stare, I sobbed quietly as I felt him begin to violate my body, he ripped my jumpsuit all the way to where he was able to reach my private area, he unzipped his pants and in that moment I finally realized that this was it, I was about to get raped and Dave was no where near to save me.
I cried harder and found myself screaming out Dave's name to help me." Dave! DAVE! PLEASE DAVE SAVE ME, OH GOD SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME!" The strange man punched me harder than the first time knocking me completely out of consciousness.
****
End of flashback
"Just when I got punch the women's bathroom was bombarded by a group of men, they pushed and dragged the man off of my unconscious body before he could actually rape me, some other man tried waking me up and when I finally did wake up my eyes immediately went to the group of men punching and beating up the man that tried raping me." I said looking at Dave, he stayed quiet so I continued speak.
"The man that was next to me wrapped his jacket around me and helped me off the floor, by then I was just so frightened that I could barely move, my whole body felt heavy I was still in a state of shock, my mind was completely blank, He helped me out the club and had me sit in his car, he tried leaving me in his car to go back and handle the pervert but for some reason I wouldn't let him leave me, I remember begging this complete stranger to stay with me, because I feared if he left me alone the same thing that happened in that god forsaken bathroom is the same thing that'll happen outside the club, he listened to me and stayed with me, he actually stayed with me and never left my side that night, I just balled out crying on this strangers chest." I quickly swiped my cheeks ridding it of the tears that were streaking my face.
"He told me that he ran the club, and when he saw me he wanted to approach me but noticed that I was with you, but that didn't stop him from keeping a close eye on me, and honestly I'm actually glad he did, because if he hadn't seen me enter that bathroom with that man following behind me I would've ended up getting raped, it just sickens me so much then after everything I been through that night when you saw me with the man who saved me you immediately got angry and assumed that I was cheating on you, and when I tried explaining to you that I almost got raped, you said the most vile shit to me that it damn near broke my heart."
****
Flashback
"Who the fuck is dumb enough to stoop so low as to raping you? I mean have they seen you? Are they blind? You're just using getting supposedly almost raped as an excuse to cover up the fact that you out here all comfortable with some other nigga."
****
End of flashback
"You didn't... believe me, hearing those words come out your mouth shattered something inside of me, the fact that I was sexually assaulted and you didn't give not one damn hurt me, like you don't understand the excruciating pain I felt that night, I had proof, ripped clothes, cut marks, bruised cheek and nose from the rapist switch blade but you still wouldn't believe me, you didn't even want to take what I said into consideration, you didn't care at all." I let out a shaky breath as I remember how Dave beat me so brutally that same night all because I was with some other guy.
"You beat me... so bad that same night, while you were just hitting me and hitting me over and over again I secretly wished for that same man to save me one more time from you—" I placed my hand near my heart because I could already feel my chest aching all over again." So when Dave, when have you ever been there for me? Because when I needed you that night you weren't there to protect me like you promised, you weren't there to save me."
I buried that memory way deep deep inside my mind never wanting to remember what occurred on his birthday, eventually pushing the thought away helped a lot, I didn't think of what happened that day mainly because I wouldn't allow myself to, I didn't want to have to face that awful night again.
I know that doing that is incredibly unhealthy but I just refused to allow myself to constantly recollect a time that I almost got raped, ever since Dave started abusing me I've gotten pretty good at pushing awful things he's done to me to the back of my head and only remembered them when I wanted to.
I looked at the back of Dave's head, he continued to stay quiet, I heard him softly sniffle, I looked at him with a raised brow and peered my head to look a little closer at his face, I noticed tears were streaming his face I rolled my eyes at him."You're right—" he said. "I haven't been there for you like I promised I would in the past, I know you don't want to hear this but I'm really sorry I didn't believe you, you're right I should've been there to protect you it's just... just seeing you there with that guy riled up something inside of me, I was just furious seeing you with another man who wasn't me." He said wiping his cheeks.
"But why Dave? You never even liked being around me-"
"I know! I know that, but honestly it's all a lie Anura." He said finally turning his head to look at me." When you left me I never realized how empty it felt being in this house by myself, I've taken you for granted, I know that I acted like I didn't like being around you but that wasn't true because I did enjoy it, every day when I'd come home from work you'd always be there with your delicious home cooked meal waiting hot and ready for me, you were always here with a smile so bright, I know that I constantly pushed you away but I partially did it because I loved how you'd beg for me and my love, I loved the attention, loved seeing you beg, it made me feel even more wanted."
"That's sick Dave." I told him, I knew though that he had some sort of enjoyment from me begging him to love me, I'm disgusted with myself for even forcing myself on a man who wouldn't even give me a time of day.
"I know, because in the end all that pushing caused you to run into the arms of another man." I stayed quiet not knowing what to say to him, because he was right he did push me into the arms of another man, someone who actually cares about me.
After a minute of complete silence Dave spoke again." I have borderline personality disorder, it stems from the loss of my parents, when I realized how deeply I was falling for you I pushed you away before you could push me away like they did, it's a coping mechanism my therapist said I created to prevent myself from getting hurt, I didn't want to get to comfortable with you, it's obvious that I have abandonment issues which is why I treated you so awfully, because I didn't want you to do me like my parents did. All my life I held in so much hate for them, they left me at foster home then two years later they died in a car accident right after, I bottled up all that anger and only released it on you when I was feeling upset, and I'm sorry I'm so sorry I did that, I just never knew how to cope with the loss of my parents."
"I never had a family before." He continued." I spent all of my childhood in a foster home because nobody wanted to adopt me, I was one of the unlucky ones, all my friends got a family, a new home and I was stuck at the same foster home until I turned 18, luckily for me I was a complete genius, I earned a bunch of scholarships and had a lot of money saved over from working, and a little bit of money my parents so graciously save for me when I turned 18."
I stared at him shocked, this was the first time he's ever opened up to me about his parents, I never knew they died I just assumed that he didn't have a good relationship with them and that's why he never brought me around them, while I'm over here pissed at my parents for giving Luna more love and attention Dave never even gotten the chance to experience what it's like to have a real family.
"I'm sorry you had to go through that." I found myself saying, I felt terrible, even more terrible that I didn't know.
"Nah it's okay, I'm the one who's sorry—" He crawled back closer to me on the bed and held my hand." I promise you that I'll change my ways and become the better man you've always wanted." He said staring up at me sincerely, I removed my hands from his and looked away from his eyes, knowing that if I did I'd just fall for him all over again.
"We're not getting back together"
"But—"
"No who's to say if I did forgive you, right now, you wouldn't return to your abusive ways, who's to say you wouldn't go back to neglecting me and treating me like complete shit."
"Anura I put my pride aside, realized that I needed to change and I went to therapy, I'm out here opening up to a complete stranger, I wouldn't even open up to you, which says a lot, I'm doing this all because of you, I want to be a better man for you."
"I know you've cheated on me in the past." I said, he looked at me surprised." Yeah I'm not stupid, I know you've been having an affair for almost half of our relationship, but I never said anything because I was scared to believe it at first, I was so so in love with you that I honestly thought that you can cheat on me all you want just don't do it in front of me, I didn't care who you were sleeping with, I didn't really care who you were spending your time with when you went MIA on me all I cared about was you coming back home to me in the end." I covered my eyes with my hands to stop my tears, I felt so incredibly stupid and naive.
"H-how come that when I changed my appearance for you, you still never found me beautiful, you'd stare at me as if I was the most hideous person in the world, you'd body shame me so bad to a point where I'd literally starve myself, you'd make me feel so insecure that I was willing to do any thing for you to notice me."
"You're the most gorgeous women I've ever met, you're a goddess sent straight from God himself, your body is amazing, I only fat shamed you on purpose to prevent you from leaving me, because I thought manipulating you into thinking if you aren't even good enough for me what makes you think you'd be good enough for somebody else as a way of making you insecure." He said causing me to remove my hands from my face, I stared at him blankly.
"And that's exactly why I'll never get back with you, it doesn't matter how much you've changed, I can push back all the shit you've done to me but that doesn't necessarily mean I've forgotten about them, what we had was over the moment you weren't there for me that night."
END
Just kidding y'all, this was a super long chapter so enjoy and leave me alone and stop harassing me on Instagram, I didn't really like this chapter but the next shall be juicy and messy, somethings finna go down with Ai and Dave 👀get ready.
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btw: THANK YOU SO MUCH DECEPTION IS AT 100k reads!!!! I couldn't be a more proud mama ❤️