TW! Death, Grief and Eating disorder!
This is a part of a series. So there will be different parts with different Ghouls.
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I felt my strength slowly leaving my body. I knew that it was nearly over. I knew that I would die. I held my hand against my waist where I felt blood flowing out from a wound. It was very painful and I tried not to scream.
"Moon!" I heard someone scream my name and I knew who it was. Rain knelt down next to me and looked at me with a worried face.
"Oh, Moon..." he whispered and laid his hand on mine. i felt his hand shaking even though he tried to bide it. So I put a smile on my face even if I don't felt like that.
"E-everything will be allright." he whispered and gently took my head into his shaking hands. He laid my head into his lap.
"No." I said and tried to ignore my pain.
"Nothing will be allright." I laid my hand on his and felt his warmth. I knew I'd die so why should I lie?
"I won't make it." He looked away and I knew I was right. He thought the same.
Rain took a deep breath before he turned his head back to me again.
"I'm here with you." he said and I nodded.
"I will never leave you alone." I said to him and saw tears forming in his eyes before they rolled down his beautiful cheek.
"Shh..." I said. "Everything will be allright." my voice was shaking and Rain shaked his head.
"Not without you. I can't live without you." he started stroking my cheek.
"I will always be with You Rain, I'm a part of you. I'm the soft wind in summer you feel when you're laying on a flower meadow." I took a deep breath because It was hard to talk and breath at the same time.
"I'm the feeling of Raindrops on your skin... and... I'm the sunlight that makes everyone see your beauty." he had to smile. It was a true smile.
Suddenly he started summing a song. Already after the first notes I knew that it was "life eternal."
"Would you let me-" i started singing but he interrupted me.
"Shh." he laid a finger on his mouth.
"Let me sing. You should just listen to it." I nodded and he started singing.
"Would you let me touch your soul forever..." he sang the whole song and cradled me in his arms while I looked at him and tried to remember every detail of his handsome face. He wiped away a few tears from time to time and put on a fake-smile when he looked into my eyes. I guess he didn't knew that I still saw how worried he was when he looked away.
"If you had life eternal." he ended the song after a while and I was sad that I couldn't hear his angelic singing-voice anymore. But it was the right time because I felt that everything got better. But that wasn't a good sign.
"I don't feel pain anymore." I said to him and he looked even sadder.
"You're almost there, Pumpkin." Pumpkin. The silly nickname he gave me someday. It was the most funny nickname someone ever gave me. I had to smile immediately.
"I love you Shy Guy." Now he got a real smile on his face. I knew he loved this nickname. And now he looked at me the way he always used to look at me. Just like he was totally in love.
"I love you too, pumpkin." I looked into the sky . The sun was going down right now and the sky was red.
"Do you see the sunset?" I asked him and he looked to the sky and nodded.
"Yes. Of Course. It is as beautiful as you." I smiled and nodded. Now I could see tears rolling down his cheeks again.
"R-Rain." I said with a breaking voice. He was just staring at the sky so he wouldn't have to look at me again. I knew he just couldn't
"Please, look at me." I said and he did even if he didn't wanted to. He looked straight into my eyes.
"I-I want you... too look at the sunsets the way... you used... to look at me." I tried to smile but I felt not strong enough.
"I will." I smiled even bigger but I felt that I got weaker and weaker. I just saw his face and that was everything I wanted. I wasn't scared anymore because I knew that he was here with me until the end. And I knew that he would be okay someday.
"I-I love... you." I whispered when everything began to disappear.
"I love you too, pumpkin." The last thing I felt was how Rains lips touched mine. It was a last, soft kiss before everything got dark and cold and my heartbeat stopped.
~Rain's POV~
I was shaking when I stopped kissing her. I noticed that she died during the kiss but I didn't want it to end. I kept my eyes closed because I couldn't stand seeing her dead body. I didn't want to see her laughter gone. I didn't want to see her pale skin.
I didn't want to see how the life disappeared out of her body. And I didn't wanted to see how this beautiful person just stopped existing.
I didn't know how long I sat there before I finally opened my eyes. She laid there with closed eyes. It was like she was just sleeping. I started crying immediately, I couldn't believe that she was dead. I pulled her closer, I hid my face in her hair and started screaming. How could she be dead? I continued crying while the sun was going down.
"Rain?" After a while I felt a hand on my shoulder. I knew that it was Sodo even if I didn't looked at him. I just felt it. But I didn't wanted to look at him.
"Sh-She is gone!" I whimpered while I still cried into her hair. I heard that Sodo knelt down next to me and started stroking my back.
"Shh..." the short Ghoul started cuddeling me. I didn't wanted to cuddle right now but I had no energy to tell him.
"She can't be dead." I said and couldn't breathe anymore.
"Come on Rain. Let's go home." He said but I didn't wanted to. I just wanted to hold her.
~seven months later~
I sat wrapped in a blanket on the balcony. It was the beginning of fall and the wind was getting colder. I didn't felt the coldness. Well I just ignored it. It was way to cold but I didn't wanted to go inside. It's been a long time since her funeral and her death but I wouldn't break her promise. I had put my feet on the railing and was looking into the evening sky as the sun was setting.
"Look at the sunset the way you look at me" I heard her voice in my head again. For the last seven months I have sat on the balcony every evening and watched the sunset. I felt like I'd look at her because the sunset was nearly as beautiful as her and reminded me of her.
"Rain?" I heard Swiss Voice like through a wall.
"Rain?" he repeated which was the reason I started looking at him.
"Here again?" he asked and I just nodded without saying anything. Swiss sat down on the other chair. We were quiet for a while.
"Don't you wanna eat?" he asked and I looked at my plate with the untouched food. Pasta. I used to love this meal but I just wasn't hungry. I haven't eaten anything in days, which is often the case lately. I was now very thin and you could clearly see my ribs but I just wasn't hungry. Life was just meaningless without her, why should I eat? Or what should I do in any way? I don't eat, I don't sleep. I just sit in a chair the whole day and look at a wall because I feel so much pain that I couldn't move in any way. And sometimes I just feel nothing. No pain, no sadness but also no happiness. There was nothing. Like there just would be a black whole where my heart used to be.
"Come on, eat something." Swiss tried again but i just pushed my plate demonstratively towards the bigger Ghoul.
"This can not go on like this." he said desperately. "You can't stop eating and freeze your ass out here every night!" provocatively he pulled up the zipper of his jacket.
"And if I can." I mumbled and heard him sighing.
"Rain... we just want to help you." he said softly. I knew that he just wanted to help me but I also know he couldn't.
"I don't need no help unless you can bring me back my Moon." I said and felt tears forming in my eyes.
"But I can't" Swiss said and I nodded.
"I know. And that's why you're going now."
"Rain please, let me help you." I didn't answered him. After ten minutes he stood up because he knew I wouldn't answer.
"Rain... If you wan't to talk, if you want to get some distraction or if you want help, please just talk to me. I'll always be there for you." he said before he finally left.
Now I was alone with just myself looking to the sky and thinking about that beautiful Ghoulette that came into my life a few years ago. I still hadn't changed the background of my phone. It still showed the picture of me piggybacking her. You could clearly see her beaming grin on it.
I just wished that she could sit with me here right now. That I could hear her talking about some shit that was going around the Ministry. She was always the first that knew somebody's secret or any gossip. And I was the second one that knew it because she always told me.
Now I never knew what was going on but I wasn't even interested in it. After a few more moments of staring at our picture, I threw my phone on the table and continued looking at the sky. It was one of the most beautiful sunset I've ever seen and it reminded me even more of her.
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I hope you enjoyed it. Actually I was very sad during I wrote this but I also loved this chapter.
Next one will be Aether but you can decide which Ghoul I should write after the Aether one!