Full Moons are always rough for Remus. I always try to be there for him as much as I can. It's hard, because he distances himself from me. Today is the first full moon while I live with him, and for the past few days, he was distancing himself from me, even sleeping in the little shed in the backyard. It was magicked so that he couldn't get out, even in wolf form.
I sat in the kitchen, my heart aching as I heard his howls coming from the shed. My hands twitched, as I fought the urge to go with him into that shed to help him. The howling went on throughout the entire night, and I stayed up, not getting a wink of sleep. Soon, the sun rose, and the howling stopped. I jumped up from my chair and ran out to the garden, just as Remus stumbled out of the shed. He was bloodied, with new cuts and gashes, and he could barely stand.
"Remus!" I gasped.
"Last night." he gasped. "Worst. One. In a...while."
I wrapped my arms around him. "Let's get you to bed love."
I helped him up to our room and laid him gently on the bed. I hurriedly took off his shirt and I grabbed my first aid kit and my wand. I kept whispering sweet nothingness into Remus ear as I cleaned off his wounds and then I started dabbing ointment that Pomfrey had given me. I dabbed it all over his new gashes, while stroking his hair. I tapped my wand and bandages wrapped around him. His eyes were fluttering and my heart ached.
"Remus, don't fall asleep yet." I said softly. "Let me fix you up something quick to eat."
He shook his head.
"Just toast." I insisted.
He didn't respond, so I ran downstairs and quickly smacked some jam on a piece of toast, and brought it upstairs. I fed it to him and then wiped his face.
"Water. Drink some water." I said, holding a cup to his mouth. When he finished, I helped him lie back down and I pulled the blankets over him. I tucked him in and kissed him softly all over his face. "I love you Remus."
"I love you Sara." he rasped.
"Don't speak." I said softly. "Rest up." I stroked his hair while his eyes fluttered closed. His breathing evened out as he fell asleep, much quicker than I had ever seen him fall asleep.
I bit back a sob as I watched him sleep. I continued to stroke his hair with one hand as I put my other hand over my mouth, so quiet my crying. It hurt that Remus was hurting so much. I hated how he had to go through his every single month. I hated how I couldn't be there during his transformations. I hated how we had no wolfsbane because we couldn't afford all of the ingredients. I had offered to beg Snape for the ingredients, but Remus said he didn't want to show Snape that he needed him. I thought it was incredibly stupid. I kept stroking his hair, when a knock sounded throughout the house. Remus didn't move, so I kissed his forehead softly and ran downstairs.
I was surprised to see Tonks, Ollie, Fleur, Bill, Fred, and George. Bill was holding a bag.
"What are you all doing here." I asked.
"It was a full moon yesterday, wasn't it?" asked Bill.
"Oh, yes. It was." I sighed. "Remus is sleeping right now. Last night was a rough one. It was bad."
I stepped back to let them all in.
"So, you haven't had any transformations, have you?" asked Tonks with great interest.
"No. The only thing that's really happened is that I have much better hearing." I smiled slightly. "So be careful with what you whisper around me."
We all sat down in the kitchen, and Bill made tea for us all.
I sighed and yawned widely.
"Did you sleep at all last night?" asked Ollie, eyeing me.
"No." I rubbed my eyes.
"Merlin, your eyes are so red." said Tonks.
"You should get some sleep." said Fred.
Bill used his wand to hand everyone their cups of tea. I sipped mine. "I had to stay awake for Remus. I couldn't sleep. All I heard was his howling and-" I broke off. "And I can't sleep now. What if he wakes up? He'll need me."
"Why don't you sleep?" said Ollie. "And we'll hang around and we'll be here if Remus wakes up."
"No. It's fine."
"Get some sleep." said Bill firmly.
So that's how I found myself curled up on the couch. I decided to let Remus have the whole bed to himself, plus he was probably still in too much physical pain to sleep with me. I curled up on the couch, but I had a hard time sleeping. Ollie came to check on me. "Ah, insomnia, your old friend?"
"Yeah." I smiled, flattered that Ollie remembered about me having a hard time sleeping. "Remember when we were sleeping in the Great Hall? I couldn't sleep much that night."
"I remember you telling me that." Ollie whispered, sitting on the ground in front of me.
"Percy was kind that day. And Remus got me some water." I smiled at the memory.
Ollie smiled too, squeezing my hand. "Sleep, love."
I finally found sleep, and I dreamed of Remus and I having a normal life, where he wasn't a werewolf, and we lives happily together without the fear of war looming over us. I woke up a few hours later, with all of my friends still in the house. I stayed silent when I woke up, non of them having noticed my open eyes, as they were mostly facing away from me as they talked and laughed quietly so that they wouldn't wake me up. I was grateful for these people, there for Remus and I no matter the flaws we had in our lives.
George noticed me wake up first. "She's awake!"
"Remus?" was the first thing I asked.
"He didn't wake up yet." said Bill. "I checked on him. He's still sleeping like a baby."
"Did you check if he's even breathing?" I asked, sitting up straight, looking at them wearily.
"Don't worry, he's just sleeping. I checked." Bill said firmly.
"Sorry. I always think of the worst case scenarios." I said, rubbing my eyes with a sigh.
"That's normal." Fleur said, with a small smile. "You are worried. We all are."
"Remus is just so exhausted." I sighed.
"I know." said Ollie. 'But hey, that's why we brought a bunch of tea."
"Oh, so that's what was in Bill's bag?" I asked.
The all nodded and I smiled. "I love you guys. I appreciate you being there for me."
"Ah, don't get all sappy on us." Fred grinned.
"It's true." I insisted. "You guys are great." I looked at Fred and George. "As dumb as you both are, your mother raised you well."
They both shook their hands, pretending to be embarrassed.
I stretched up my arms. "Ugh, I haven't had good sleep like that in a while."
I heard footsteps coming down the stairs and we looked to see Remus, still shirtless with his bandages all around him, rubbing his eyes.
"Remmy!" I jumped up and ran to him. "How are you feeling love?"
"Like I just turned into a werewolf yesterday and attacked myself." he said bluntly.
"Oh darling, come here." I led him to the couch. "Let me get you a sweater."
I ran upstairs and grabbed the first sweater I could find. I ran ack downstairs and helped him put it on, kissing his forehead. "Would you like some tea? Are you hungry?"
"No, I'm just exhausted." he looked at everyone. "What are you all doing here?"
"Just wanted to come and check in." said Bill, smiling. "We wanted to make sure you and Sara were doing alright."
"We remembered how last night was a full moon so....." Ollie's voice trailed off.
Remus smiled weakly. "Thank you."
"Just rest Remus." I said.
He curled up on his side and put his head on my lap after I sat down next to him. I sighed, stroking his hair and looking down at him as he fell asleep again.
"Poor bloke is so tired." said Fred, looking at Remus sleeping.
"I know." I said, tracing the scars on his face softly. "But he's so strong too." I smiled softly.
"Yeah. He is." Bill nodded in agreement.
I looked up. "Any news on Katie Bell?"
"No, she's still in St. Mungo's." said Tonks. "I think she's going to have to stay there all throughout Christmas break too."
"Oh the poor girl." I sighed. "I knew her. She was only a few years younger than me. Very sweet girl. It's a shame what happened."
"Mad-Eye, Kingsley, and Minerva are trying to figure out who it is." said Tonks.
I thought back to a letter Harry had sent me, where he confided in me telling me he thinks it was Draco Malfoy who sent Katie off with the cursed necklace. I didn't have the heart to tell him I thought he was being the stupidest boy I had ever talked to. I just wrote back to him telling him to have a chat with Dumbledore about it instead.
I leaned my head back against the couch. "I'm so tired of all of this. I just wish we could go back to just a few years ago."
"Me too." Fred said.