Saffron's POV:
It's been three months since I started dating Easton, and everything feels just right. He's everything I'm looking for in a partner - cute, funny, and passionate. But deep down, I know the real reason why I'm drawn to him.
Every time I look at Easton, I can't help but think about Erynn, They have the same easy smile, the same relaxed disposition, and a shared passion for music. I've tried to push that thought aside, but it creeps up on me whenever I'm around him.
Maybe that's why I'm so infatuated with him. Erynn was the love of my life, my first real relationship, and it still hurts when I think about what we had. But here I am, starting something new with someone new, and it feels like I'm betraying her.
Erynn, even after 8 months still occupies my thoughts. I still miss her, no matter how busy I get or how distracted I am, I still find a split second to think about her. I still couldn't shake the feeling that she was the one I was meant to be with.
The truth is, I'm using Easton to fill the void that Erynn had left behind. Easton is a musician, like Erynn, and there were moments when he would say or do something that reminded me of her. I tried to ignore it, and told myself that I was just happy to be with someone who actually makes time for me.
At first, I though he was charming and funny, and I was drawn to his infectious energy. But the more time I spent with him, the more I realized that he was nothing like Erynn. Not to mention, there were some red flags here and there, like when he would only talk about his music and barely ask me about myself. But I brushed it off, thinking he was just passionate about his craft.
As time went on, I realize I can't keep living a lie. I knew I had to be honest with him. I couldn't keep leading him on, pretending that everything was fine when it wasn't. I owed it to him to be truthful, no matter how much it hurt.
I felt guilty for leading him on, but I didn't know how to break things off without hurting him. I was scared of being alone, and I didn't want to face the fact that I still love someone who might never come back to me.
But every time I thought about ending things, I feel like a terrible person. Easton had invested so much time and energy into our relationship, and I felt like I was just throwing it all away.
——————-xx—————-
Not knowing what to do, I dialed Madiha's number, feeling a wave of anxiety wash over me. I needed to talk to someone, someone who would listen and understand. As the phone rang, my heart pounded in my chest, and I could barely catch my breath.
"Hey, Saffron! What's up?" Madiha's cheerful voice greeted me on the other side of the line.
I took a deep breath, trying to steady myself before plunging into the heavy topic that weighed me down. "Hey, Madiha... I need to talk to you. It's about Easton," I managed to utter, my voice shaky and filled with an undeniable sadness.
"What's going on?" Madiha asked, her voice laced with concern. "Are you okay?"
The words stumbled out of my mouth as I poured out my conflicted feelings. "I think... I think I want to break up with Easton, but I feel so guilty about it. He's a good person, you know? He genuinely cares for me, and I don't want to hurt him."
Madiha listened patiently as I poured out my heart to her. I told her about my mixed feelings towards Easton, and how I couldn't help but compare him to Erynn. I talked about my fears of being alone, and my worries that I was making the wrong choice.
Madiha didn't judge me or try to tell me what to do. She just listened, offering supportive words and gentle reassurance.
There was a brief pause before she responded, her voice gentle and comforting. "Saffron, you can't base your decisions solely on guilt. You have to think about your own happiness too. It's okay to prioritize yourself."
Tears welled up in my eyes as Madiha's words sank in. I had been so focused on protecting Easton's feelings that I had forgotten about my own. I couldn't continue pretending, pretending that my heart was fully invested in this relationship. It was unfair to both of us.
"But what if I'm making a mistake?" I whispered, my voice trembling with doubt. "What if I regret breaking up with him? What if I'm letting go of something good?" Like what I did with Erynn.
Madiha paused, her voice filled with understanding. "Listen, Saff, only you can truly know what's best for you. It's normal to have doubts, especially when you care about someone. But deep down, you have to trust your instincts. If you're staying with Easton out of guilt or..." Madiha paused, letting silence linger in the air. "...or because he reminds you of someone from your past, it's not fair to either of you. You have to be honest with yourself and with him."
Her words resonated with me, and a sense of clarity washed over me. I had been ignoring the truth, clinging to a relationship that wasn't right for me. It was time to face my fears and prioritize my own happiness.
"Thank you, Madi," I said, my voice filled with gratitude. "You always know how to put things into perspective. I don't know what I would do without you."
"You're welcome, Saff. Remember, I'm here for you no matter what. Take your time and make the decision that feels right for you. You deserve happiness."
As I hung up the phone, I felt a mix of emotions swirling inside me. Breaking up with Easton wouldn't be easy, but I knew it was what I needed to do.
I know it's going to be a difficult conversation but it has to be done. I fell asleep thinking about how to break the guy gently.
Unbeknowst to me, being gentle is the last thing I want to do to him tomorrow.
———————x——————
I could hardly believe my eyes as I stood frozen in the doorway of Easton's apartment. My heart dropped to the pit of my stomach as I took in the scene before me. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. There they were, Easton and another girl, laughing and holding hands like they were the only two people in the world. My heart sank as the realization hit me like a ton of bricks - Easton had been using me all along.
As I watched them, my mind raced with questions – how long had this been going on? Was I just a pawn in their twisted game?
I felt a mix of anger, betrayal, and heartbreak welling up inside of me. It was as if the ground had been ripped from beneath my feet, leaving me lost and vulnerable.
As I stepped into the room, Easton's eyes shot up to meet mine. We locked gazes, and in that moment, I could see the guilt written all over his face. But it wasn't just guilt. It was something else. It was a look that said he knew exactly what he had done and that he didn't care.
"What is going on? Who is she?" I spat, my voice trembling with a mix of anger and hurt.
Easton sheepishly looked down, unable to meet my eyes. "Saffron, I... She's my girlfriend. We've been seeing each other for a while now."
The words hit me like a punch to the gut. The devastating realization struck me - Easton had only been with me to further his own career. All those dreams we had talked about, all the support and care... it had all been a façade.
At first, I was more than willing to support him - attend his gigs, write about his performances, and recommend him to my contacts in the music industry. However, I never knew that I was merely a stepping stone towards his success.
My face red in anger, I clenched my fists tightly by my side. "You used me, Easton," I whispered, my voice choked with emotion. "I gave you everything, and you used me for your own gain."
Easton's face twisted into something uglier than I had ever seen before. "You were just a means to an end, Saffron. I used you to further my career. She's the one who I really love..."
I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Anger began to burn me, fueling my words. "You made me believe in us. You made me think we had something real. How could you be so heartless?"
Easton stood up, a bitter smirk playing on his lips. "Love is just a game, Saffron. And I played it better than you did."
I took a step back. How could I have been so blind? How could I have trusted someone who saw me as nothing more than a means to an end? The weight of his betrayal threatened to suffocate me.
My blood boiled with an intensity I had never experienced before. The anger that consumed me was an inferno, raging out of control. It fueled my every thought, my every action. How could Easton have done this to me? He used me as stepping stones to his own selfish desires.
My voice dripping with venom. "You thought you could play me like a fool, Easton? You thought you could cheat on me and use me to further your own damn career? Well, congratulations! You succeeded in showing your true colors, in revealing just how much of a heartless asshole you really are."
My words were sharp, like daggers cutting through the air, aimed to inflict as much pain as I felt inside.
Without hesitation, I slapped him across the face with a force fueled by hurt and anger. The sound echoed through the room, followed by a stunned silence. Easton recoiled, his hand instinctively reaching to his reddening cheek. In that moment, I felt a twisted sense of justice, as if that slap is a small victory in reclaiming my shattered dignity.
"Fuck you, Dickhead." I took a deep breath, turned my back on Easton, and walked away with my head held high. Eventually, the anger began to subside, leaving behind a mix of exhaustion and bitter resignation. In that moment, I made a decision. I would no longer waste my energy on someone who had proved himself to be an asshole. I slammed the door, knowing this would be the last time I think of him.
——————-xx—————-
(A/N:) The new guy came and went just like that lol. Just a short chapter that I felt is needed for the story.